Chapter 1:

This Journal Feels... Wrong

Men Journey Journal


Tanaka was a well known hiker, always smiling, always full of energy. He had a way of making people feel like every climb, every trail, was just another step toward something greater. 

But now, he had been missing for a month. No one had seen him, no one knew where he had gone.

On this freezing morning, as the wind howled through the trees, I stumbled upon something strange. A worn-out journal lay half-buried in the frost covered dirt. At first, I didn’t think much of it. Just some old notebook someone had dropped. But when I picked it up, dusting off the damp cover, my eyes narrowed at the words scribbled in bold, uneven letters:

I am God.

I hesitated. I’m not religious. Haven’t been for a long time. So why was I even bothering to pick up something with "God" written all over it? I almost left it there, but something about it felt… off. Too deliberate. Too personal.

Curiosity won. I flipped it open, expecting to see prayers or something spiritual. But instead, I found scattered thoughts, timestamps, and strange coded markings. 

The next section caught my eye. Written in large, confident strokes at the top of the page were the words:

Quote of the day.

Beneath it, a statement that made me pause:

I am God, and I can do anything. God is not real, but I am, and I can do anything I set my mind to.

I read it again, unsure what to make of it. Was this arrogance? Delusion? Or just someone trying to push themselves forward? My eyes drifted to the next line.

Am I arrogant for calling myself God? Well… maybe I am. I should be more humble.

At the bottom of the page, there were rough sketches, a star, a mountain peak, and messy scribbles forming a conclusion:

Maybe I’m no God, no higher force, or anything like that… but I am the best that I can be.

I stared at the words, rolling them over in my mind. They weren’t particularly deep or groundbreaking. If anything, they felt like a mix of motivation and insecurity, written in the heat of a moment.

Maybe I shouldn’t be reading this. It felt too personal, like something never meant for anyone else's eyes.

I flipped through more pages, running my fingers over the ink that had slightly bled into the paper. Then, I stopped on a page filled with repeated handwriting someone had been practicing their signature.

Tanaka.

Some guy named Tanaka, huh.

Who am I, you ask? That’s a question I’ve asked myself more than once, and I still don’t have the perfect answer. Why am I not religious? That’s easy: because I don’t believe in it. I don’t want to live by someone else’s rules, pretending there’s a higher power guiding my every step.

 Was I ever religious? Yeah, when I was younger, I thought maybe I could find something in it. There was this girl, really pretty, and she believed in all that stuff. So I thought, "If she can believe, maybe it’s worth a shot." But now? I’m an atheist. And I’m proud of it. I don’t need religion to tell me what’s right and wrong. I believe in living in the now, in making my own choices, carving my own path.

These days, I’m all about finding meaning in the present. It’s not some big spiritual thing, just the small moments the kind that can shift your whole perspective in an instant. Sure, I still have my dark days, and life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. There’s no denying that things can feel hard, even overwhelming. But here’s the truth: I still have control. I can still choose how I see the world, how I act, how I move forward. And that’s powerful. I might not have a higher power to lean on, but I have myself. And that’s more than enough.

Lately, though, I’ve been feeling stuck. Not because I’ve lost faith in the world or in myself, but because I’ve gotten too comfortable. Too... predictable. Everything feels like it’s on autopilot, like I’m just going through the motions. Life should be more than just checking off boxes, shouldn’t it? I want something new, something to shake me up a bit. And then I found this journal. "I am God," it says, in big, bold letters. Ridiculous, right? But maybe that's the point. Maybe I need to tap into that kind of confidence the kind that says, "I am in control. I am capable. I am enough."

Maybe it’s not about believing in a god, but believing in myself. Maybe this journal is exactly what I need a reminder that I have the power to break free from the monotony and start something different. I don’t expect it to be life-changing, but maybe... just maybe... it’ll give me that spark I’ve been missing. I’m ready for something more. Something real. And I think this journal might just be the first step.

At that moment, I had no idea that the man who had written this journal had been missing for weeks.

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