There's no way I like gals, right? chapter 1

1

There she is. Again. Fuck. I hate her so much. I hate her confident smile. Her stupidly cute face. her overwhelming bright and bubbly personality. I hate it. I hate it, hate it, hate it. Honestly. The world would be so much better off without people like her. These people on the top of the social hierarchy, who think everyone else is but a mere slave to them. These people, who can do anything they want, without a care in the world simply because they are ‘popular’. These people. Who ruin the lives of people like me.

And the one I hate most is none other than the most popular girl in our year, Akari Tanaka. She’s currently sitting there on a table, chatting away with her popular group of friends without a care in the world. The rays of sunlight shone on her, casting an almost bright aura around her, as though to say, ‘back off, lowly peasant.’ The radiance leaking through the windows only accentuated her perfect features. She had a small, cute face. Big stunning eyes, which glistened like jewels in the light, a small, petite nose, and a bright cheerful smile. Her flowing and vibrant hair that draped down her shoulders, and cute bangs which covered her forehead. Her figure also was top tier. She had big boob–

Wait, what the hell am I thinking!!! I thought to myself. I hate this girl. Why am I talking about her like I’m a schoolgirl with a crush. There’s no way I would like her. Someone so self-centred and arrogant. R-right? I-I’m a girl myself anyway! T-there’s no way I like other girls…

Right. I’m also a girl myself. A girl who is the complete opposite of Akari. I’m Hina Sasaki. And I’m a loner. I have a small face, with half-lidded eyes which constantly had dark eye bags clinging onto them. A small, round nose, with big, black framed glasses perched upon it, and a quiet mouth which barely ever spoke to anyone besides my own family. Scruffy, dishevelled black hair flowed from my head, and all this was perched on a skinny frame devoid of any curves which would attract gazes. I was also short. Rly short. Even for a girl. So short that I’ve been mistaken to be a couple years younger than my actual age multiple times. I would never think of myself as cute, or anything near Akari’s league –

“Hina”

My teacher’s cold and harsh voice cut through my thoughts like a knife. I was brought back to reality almost suddenly. She stared at me with a condescending glare.

“Answer this question.”

“Y-yes..”

I replied meekly.

I slowly and nervously got up from my seat and began frantically flipping the pages of the textbook. In all honesty, I hadn’t listened to the teacher at all, and I was now suffering the consequences of being in my own little world. As I desperately continued to search for the question, I could feel it again. The stares. I hated being put on the spot. I could feel everyone’s stares on me. Scrutinizing every little detail or action I do, just waiting for me to mess up so they can make fun of or jeer at me. They all looked at me with intent eyes, just waiting. My throat seemed to grow tighter as it became harder to breathe. My head started hurting, and my knees grew weak. It took all my strength at that moment just to stand. My breathing grew more heavy and rapid as I could feel their sinister stares scan all over me, waiting for me to mess up like the loser I am.

“I’ll answer it!”

Akari’s sudden cheerful and bright voice cut through my dark thoughts like a bright sun on a rainy day.

“Are u sure?”

The teacher asked

“Yes!”

She replied enthusiastically. She jolted up from her seat and answer with a loud, “24!”

“Mhm. That’s correct. Pay attention next time, Hina.”

“Y-yes..”

I immediately sat down and was consumed by my thoughts again. Why did Akari answer for me? it intrigued me, puzzled me. Why would such a popular girl like her help out a loner like me? no, no. that can’t be it. She couldn’t have been helping me. S-she was just… reinforcing her position by correcting the loser! Yea! That’s right! There’s no way someone like her would do that out of the kindness of her heart.

Right?

The bell rung, signalling the end of class. I breathed a heavy sigh of relief and lazily began to pack up me pencil case and books. I could hear the snickers and taunts from the students around me about my incident earlier, but I was powerless and could only ignore them. as I packed up my things with my head down, I heard footsteps approaching me.

“Hina?”

It was the same cheerful voice which had saved me before.

“Ur name is Hina, right?”

I looked up and slowly took in the view of Akari in front of me. I inspected her delicate, elegant features, and her graceful ways. Maybe for a bit too long.

“Uh.. ur name IS Hina right?”

“Y-yes!”

I was instantly snapped out of my thoughts and could now feel a heat rising to my cheeks.

“That was a close one huh? Luckily I saved u~!”

Akari sung, in an almost, cheerful, sing-song kind of way.

“Y-yea..”

I tried to hide the redness which was creeping up to my cheeks due to Akari being so close to me. I breathed a shaky sigh.

“My name is Akari Tanaka! Nice to meet you!”

“Oh.. I know who you are.” I mutter coldly. “Everyone knows…” I added under my breath.

“what was that?”

“n-nothing!”

Akari suddenly leaned in close and began scanning over my face. She inspected me with a fiery intent in her eyes.

“You look really red.. are you sick?”

“N-no! I’m absolutely fine!”

She leaned in closer, her face painted with scepticism.

“Are you sure?”

Our faces were now only mere inches from each other. I could hear and feel her soft breathing and smell the scent from her fragrant hair. My head began to spin, and I desperately had to conceal the blush which was slowly appearing on my cheeks.

“I-I have to go.”

I suddenly stood up and grabbed my bag, heading out of the classroom efficiently and swiftly. Once out of the view of any classmates, my mind started rambling again.

W-what the hell was that? Why was I so flustered and nervous? I-I don’t like her! N-no way right? And why did she come up to talk to me… R-right! She had to maintain her image of a kind and popular girl, so she did so through comfort a loser like me! T-that’s what happened.

R-right?

I couldn’t sleep a wink last night. All night I was tossing and turning in bed, my mind clouded with thoughts. The dark bags under my eyes had only become more pronounced, as they clutched to my droopy eyes. I stumbled drowsily through the street, an occasional yawn escaping my lips. If only I could sleep right now on the street –

“Hina!”

H-huh! N-no way.. d-don’t tell me..

“Hina!”

The loud voice called again, ringing through the silence of the calm morning streets. It was Akari. No doubt.

“Wow! What a coincidence! I never see u on my walk to school!”

She said as she approached me.

“Y-yea… I couldn’t really sleep last night… so I’m walking to school later than usual.”

“Oh… yea I can see that. You really couldn’t sleep huh?”

I nodded shyly and thought to myself, ‘and who’s fault is that huh???’

“Are you sure you’re not sick? I mean… yesterday before you ran off you looked really pale.”

“I-I’m fine!”

“U sure?”

Akari leaned in closer again. I was again temporarily starstruck by her pretty and delicate features. she leaned her face in closer and looked at me as though inspecting a lost child. We stopped walking, and she slowly reached her hands to grab my face and gently placed our foreheads together.

“Hmm… your forehead does seem a little hot”

I felt a familiar heat rise up, a blush threatening to paint my features. I hastily pulled away.

“W-what are you doing???”

“Oh. Just checking your temperature.”

I couldn’t bare to look Akari in the eyes, much less even look at her, without the threat of red tinging my cheeks. I quickly turned around.

“I-I gotta go…”

I clutched the strap of my bag, head down, and I ran. I ran all the way until I had reached the school gates. As I tried to gather myself through a few deep breaths of the tranquil morning air, my mind was instantly racing with thoughts.

W-why? Why am I reacting like this? To Akari out of all people? Theres no way, right? I don’t like girls. I-I’m not lesbian…A-Akari’s just… trying to get a rise out of me! Yea! I bet this is another classic case of the popular kid teasing the loner to get a reaction out of them! N-no other reason! B-but… then… why am I reacting like this to her?

I exhaled a final time and tried to mentally prepare myself for the school day ahead. I cautiously but swiftly paced through the school gates, until I reached my shoe locker. I changed out of my shoes into my school slippers, and walked to my classroom, prepared to start the day.

I sat down, and sure enough, there they were again. The popular kids. Akari and her friends were again seated around each other, chatting away blissfully without a care in the world. Fuck. Why do they get to live so carefreely just because they’re popular. Makes me sick. So sick honestly. They live, so unconcerned and oblivious, knowing that they are levels above mere peasants like me. The world would be so much better off without them.

I looked over to Akari again. Like usual, the rays of yellow sunlight which coated the room was really bringing out and accentuate her soft, flawless features. Fucking slut. I continued stalking her, as if I was a killer scouting out her next victim. She continued giggling and chatting, probably about how many guys she’s been with or whatever popular girls talk about these days. She then turned to me. And waved.

My body and mind instantly froze. It was as if my brain suddenly short circuited, instantly clearing the ability for me to form any coherent thought. All I could do was stare mindlessly at Akari, who was waving to me with her usual bubbly grin. I felt the familiar feeling of heat rushing up again, threatening to tinge my cheeks rosily. Something tugged at the edges of Akari’s lips, and her signature grin turned into something of a mischievous smirk. I instantly looked down to my table, not daring to pull my head back up again. Maybe not for ever.

W-why did she do that? S-she was teasing me, right? Y-yeah… surely... that’s why she was smirking at the end. There’s no way such a respected and revered queen like her would wave hello to a loser like me. S-she was just teasing me. I’m sure of it.

I spent the rest of the class with my head down. I did not dare to look up, not even for a split second. My mind was still filled with thoughts… thoughts about Akari… I abruptly slapped both my cheeks with my two palms, causing a soft smack sound. The self-inflicted action did little to ease my mind, as my brain continued to race with thoughts of Akari. No way. I-I don’t like her. Not at all. She’s just…very memorable. As I stared down at my textbook, the words on the page turned into a jumble of words and symbols. I could not concentrate at all.

I sighed heavily as I sat down in my usual place for lunch. It was a wall of one of the lesser used buildings, with a few weathered wooden benches and a vending machine serving as décor. The wall was originally painted a bright white but had now faded into a much more softer colour due to the elements. No one ever came here, as the building had not served any practical purpose. It was the only place where I didn’t have to deal with people’s constant stares and muttering. Being invisible was better than being bullied.

The vending machine was still boasting fresh refreshments every day, which often surprised me, as no one ever thought of coming here to purchase a drink. It was a long walk from the nearest class. I placed my pink plastic lunchbox and opened the lid, revealing the contents. It was always made by my older sister – I was too lazy to cook anything myself. I scanned over the box of food. Tamagoyaki, kaarage, salad, etc. With a quiet phrase of gratitude, I picked up my chopsticks and began to eat. I then heard footsteps approaching and froze.

Why? No one ever came here! Why today? What could they possibly want? My mind continued to race with questions as I heard the footsteps come closer. With a swift turn around the corner, I could make out who it was. Akari.

H-huh??? W-why the hell is she here??? N-no way… don’t tell me… she found out I ate lunch by myself and is going to bully me for it??? I kept my guard up and avoided eye contact as much as possible, like a prey minding its own business.

“Hina?”

Oh no.

“O-oh…hi Akari…w-why are you here?”

Akari’s puzzled expression morphed back into her bright usual smile.

“Oh. All the other vending machines in school were taken for maintenance today, but I guessed they missed this one, since no one ever goes to it. I just needed a drink”

“A-a drink… huh…g-go ahead”

What the hell??? Why am I saying go ahead like I own the vending machine??? I verbally berated myself

“Thanks!”

Akari took out two silver coins and slotted them into the vending machine. With a loud ‘ka-thunk’ sound, echoing in the silence, she reached down to grab her drink.

Don’t look at her ass. Don’t look at her ass. Don’t look at her ass.

“Hina? Are you alright? You ran off this morning…”

“Y-yeah! Absolutely fine!”

I jolted up, snapped from my immoral thoughts. Akari smiled reassuringly and waved her soda can in the air, which glistened in the sunlight.

“Do you like this drink?”

“H-huh?”

I looked at the can she was holding and read it.

“S-sorry… I don’t really drink coffee. It’s too bitter.”

“So, you prefer tea more? Or soda?”

“U-uh…I don’t really prefer one over another…they’re both better than coffee though at least.”

“Yea…I can see that. I don’t even know why I started drinking coffee honestly. I guess it just made me seem more grown up. Which I guess allowed me to make more friends.”

This bitch! I thought. All she cared is being popular!

“B-but… its still very bitter. I can’t deny it. I-I hate how it tastes.”

“H-huh?”

I was suddenly taken aback. This was the first time I had seen or even heard of Akari, the Akari Tanaka, being uncertain about something. Her usual smile faded a little, but she quickly caught wind of it and plastered on her signature grin again. She then slotted another two coins, and with another ‘ka-chunk!’, she threw me a can of melon soda.

“See you!”

Oh no. Don’t tell me she was going to eat lunch with me every day from now on.

Finally. The end of school. I exhaled and packed up my pencil case and textbooks, shoving them tightly in my book bag. I walked to my shoe locker and changed from my slippers back to my shoes. The school was quiet and empty, as I had decided to wait a little longer than everyone else to leave in case Akari somehow caught me again. The school yard was tranquil, with the trees swaying and leaves rustling in the autumn breeze. The vast and expansive concrete tracks laid in front of me, its weathered and cool grey soaking in the last of the evening rays. The orange and red leaves continued to dance, and at each end of the field was a white rusty goalpost. The lush green grass surrounding the yard had now faded into a more rustic greyish green. A few scattered balls laid on the field, soccer, baseball, basketball, etc.

“HEY!”

I jolted as I heard a loud shout behind me. And it didn’t sound like Akari. I slowly turned around.

“What are you doing, are you in a club?”

It was a teacher.

“N-no…”

I mumbled pathetically.

“Then go home. Students who aren’t in clubs can’t stay in school after class”

“Y-yes…”

I muttered sheepishly. I then turned around with my head down and walked to the train station as fast as I could.

I always took the train to school. I don’t really know why. I guess it was just a sense of comfort. Theres no judging or jeering. No ‘I’m better than you’ or ‘I’m more popular than you’. Everyone was the same, just people minding their own businesses, with their own goals and places to be. It was quiet. But a comforting type of silence. Everyone, with their own purposes, not judging or teasing anyone else who was different.

As I made my way through the streets, I again internally cursed at listening to my sister. She had recommended me to go to a high school situated in Shibuya, that way I could ‘enjoy my youth’. Yea. Only if you actually had fucking friends. To loners like me, the urban jungle was just another tiring and long obstacle before I got home.

“Curse you big sis…”

I muttered under my breath.

It was quite late by now, so the streets lights had already been set up and people were already out. The vivid and bright neon signs and billboards shined brightly, each with a different product or ad screaming in your face. Idol and anime posters hung from each building, each showing a new show or a ‘supposedly’ attractive man, though I had yet to find one to swoon over. The tall concrete office buildings and department stores were tightly packed and sandwiched between one another, each one taller than the last. Tall, black streetlights were so plentiful that they made it seem like it was as bright as day. The grey and dull concrete sidewalk sprawled everywhere, each end snaking into another road or alley. It reflected the kaleidoscope of colours casted by the bright signs and lights. The constant sea of moving people emitted a loud murmur of chattery and laughs, as I navigated through the sea of pedestrians. The loud honks of taxis rung through the air, mixed with the sounds of buses and other cars. Shibuya made me feel even more small and alone. And I felt lonely enough.

As I made it to the station, I scanned my JR card and hastily made it down the stairs to my platform. The platforms had a flooring of yellowish-white marble tiles and pillars. Dim fluorescent lights hung from the ceiling, emitting a dull buzzing. You would think for a city like Shibuya, they would at least upgrade their train stations. The walls again were plastered with billboards and advertisements. However, this was still much calmer than all the commotion which occurred above. I exhaled and calmed myself down as I stood waiting for my train. the signature green and silver train soon arrived, paired with an announcement on the intercom. I waited patiently for the passengers to file out of the train, before stepping on the train myself. I finally breathed a sigh of relief as I collapsed onto a seat, exhausted.

“The next station is Nakameguro”

The loud announcement jolted me awake from my daze, and I slowly came to my sense again. I adjusted my glasses and slowly got up, preparing to leave the train.

Finally, home. Or Nakameguro. Nakameguro was one of the more quieter and calmer neighbourhoods of Tokyo, something I greatly appreciated. The streets here, unlike Shibuya, were unassuming and quiet, with old brick buildings lining the streets. Faint glows and dims occasionally radiated from izakaya’s and restaurants. A few modern and polished buildings here and there, emitting bright lights which lit up the whole street. Bicycles and minivans would occasionally whiz through. The grey concrete path echoed the sound of my footsteps.

“I’m home!”

I knocked on the door

My sister opened the door.

“Who is is it?”

I heard my mother call, presumably from the kitchen

“It’s Hina!”

I stepped in the house and gently closed the door behind me. I changed out of my shoes and into my slippers, and slowly advanced to the sound of my mother’s voice. I was correct. She was in the kitchen. And she did not look happy.

“Where the hell have you been???”

“U-uh… I had to do something after school.”

“U-uh… a club.”

I couldn’t bear to tell my mother that the real reason was to avoid a girl.

Her face suddenly contorted into an expression of joy and surprise.

“Y-you joined a club???”

“Yes mom…”

“Wow! Really? That’s a first! I never expected you to, since you’re so shy and all. But this is great! Maybe you’ll make some friends!”

“Yeah mom, maybe…”

“Aww don’t be like that sweetie. This is an excellent opportunity for you to socialize and make more friends! You could even invite some over!”

“Yeah…”

I slowly paced out of the kitchen and into the living room, slumping on the couch like a lifeless corpse. My sister, Hana, walked over to me with a mischievous grin plastered on her face.

“What do you want.”

I snapped.

“Oh… nothing, just… wanted to ask what club you joined”

“I-I, uh… T-that’s none of your business!”

“Oh? Don’t tell me you lied to mom…”

“T-that’s…”

She sat down next to me and leaned in closer.

“I know why you lied… and don’t worry I’ll keep it a secret…

“W-why did I lie?”

“Because you were secretly hanging out with your friends! Of course I would know! I used to do that all the time!”

“U-uh… yea… right… friends.”

I nervously agreed. She couldn’t have been further off from the truth

“So… I’ll keep it a secret, ok? I knew you would appreciate my high school offer eventually!”

“U-uh… yea… Shibuya at night was… fun.”

“I know! Why else did you think your big sis recommended you go there?”

She announced triumphantly and proudly.

“Yea… thanks.”

Her playful smirk contorted into a full-on grin.

“Were there any guys?”

“Go away!”

The next day, I made sure to wake up extra early to avoid crossing paths with Akari. I got up half an hour earlier than usual, which caused my sister to stir.

“Wha…why so early today?”

I suddenly jumped up, not expecting to have waken anyone.

“O-oh… morning sis.”

“Mornin”

She yawned and stretched her arms over her head. Her loose and baggy pyjamas were draped over her curvy body, and her long hair was messy and unkempt. Her pale skin was accentuated by the cold morning darkness.

“It’s not fair…”

I mutter, glaring at her breasts, which were much bigger than mine. Unlike my sister, I was still flat as a board.

“Huh? Wha was that?”

“Nothin…”

“Oh…I get it…”

“Get what…”

“You’re going early today cuz you’re meeting up with a boy aren’t you?”

Her words took a few seconds to process in my brain.

“W-what???”

I sputter

“N-no! Ofc not!”

“Then why else would you get up so early… I always have to drag you out of bed”

“I-I just felt like going early ok!”

“Alright, alright, whatever you say.”

She chuckled to herself as she lazily paced back to her bedroom

The morning commute to school was less intense than the commute after school. There were usually less people, although granted there still was a lot of people. I stepped out of the house and breathed in the cold morning air. I had never gotten up this early before, so the streets seemed eerily quiet. As I walked through the empty and tranquil streets, the only sounds which could be heard were my own footsteps and the occasional van or bicycle passing by. Every store was still yet to open, all barriered shut by their steel shutters. I eventually reached the station and settled down on the train.

“Phew. Looks like she’s not here”

I thought to myself as I looked around, hiding behind a tree in the school front yard. I could feel the many gazes of curiosity and judgement stab my back, but I continued to scout out the area for any sign of Akari, I exhaled when the coast was clear.

Then it was the same routine. Shoe locker. Change shoes into slippers, then gather my textbooks and head to class. The class settled as the lesson started. The lesson went on. When suddenly…I felt a paper ball hit the front of my head.

Finally. It’s started. I thought to myself. The bullies have really ramped it up. They’re not content with just words anymore. They’ve started to use physical methods as well. I exhaled and braced for the next paper ball to be thrown my way, but it never came. After a while of shutting my eyes, I opened them, confused. No one in the class seemed to be paying attention to me…so who? I glance at the crumpled ball of paper on my desk, and slowly uncrumpled it, hoping to find a clue about its owner.

“Hi Hina!”

It said in bold and scribbly letters. I looked up, confused as to who this letter originated from. My eyes met Akari’s, who smiled happily and waved to me. It was her who had thrown the ball. She’s definitely teasing me. I thought to myself.

At lunch, I had to move from my usual spot in fear of bumping into Akari again. The only other place I knew no one would go was an empty classroom. I slid open the door to the empty and quiet classroom and sat down carefully on one of the old desks. I opened my lunchbox and began to eat. The sound of my loneliness echoed through the empty hallway.

PE. Fuck. I absolutely hate PE. It’s the one subject I dread the most. I clearly was not born athletically gifted. I’m short, skinny and slow. The complete opposite of Akari. Akari was not only gifted in the looks department but maxed out on the athletic department as well. She’s fast, strong, and energetic. Her movements are swift yet graceful, and her abs… oh…

I began imagining Akari’s toned body which was concealed under her sports uniform. Those contours… edges… W-what the hell am I thinkin??? I suddenly slapped myself again with both my palms, this time making a sharp clap sound. No no no no… why am I thinking about her in this way? I-I don’t even like her…I’m sure of it.

I walked into the change room and slowly unbuttoned my uniform. I then slipped into my sports uniform and cautiously walked outside to meet the rest of the class.

“We’re doing laps today.”

The gym teacher said. A collective groan escaped from the class. The gym teacher was a tall and burly man, with short, striking black hair and piercing eyes. The outlines of his muscles could be seen through his tracksuit. No one dared to disagree with him. The gym teacher then randomly split us into groups, with one group running at a time. I brought my knees to my chest and slumped, nervously waiting for our turn.

The whistle blew, and I went forward with all my might. As I continued running, the sound of my feet meeting the floor became less frequent, and m breathing grew more ragged and rapid. The more the lap went on, the more my vision blurred, and the more difficult breathing became. My throat felt like it was closing in, and my breathing only grew heavier. I panted desperately as I continued stumbling, each step heavier than the last. My form turned sluggish as I slowed down, and I bent over, panting. The sweat trickled down my cheeks and eyebrows, seeping into the concrete track below.

I took a big sip of water, relieved that PE was finally over. As I sat there exhausted on the floor, I could hear murmurs and mutter behind me. I could make out it was the voices of two or three boys.

“Did you see her?”

“Yea! She was so fucking slow!”

“I know right! Like how the hell was that even possible???”

They then all laughed in unison and continue to hurl insults my way. I hated it. It’s all coming back to me again. The popular kids picking on the loners. Just because they’re popular, they’re allowed to look down and jeer at people below them. Those on top of the social hierarchy, who can insult anyone below without a care in the world. I dropped my head down onto my knees and pulled my knees closer to my chest. Please stop. I thought to myself.

“What the hell did you just say?”

The sharp but recognisable voice cut through my dark thoughts like a blade. Akari? Oh no… she was probably going to join them in bullying me wasn’t she. And just when I thought she wasn’t that bad…

“What the fuck did you just say?”

Akari repeated again to the boys, her tone sharp.

“Aw hey Akari! We were just talking about this loser. She was so fucking slow in class, you wouldn’t believe it!”

“Yea! You should’ve seen her! She was pathetic!”

That’s right. I am. I’m pathetic. Nothing but a pathetic loser.

“Don’t hey Akari me.’

Akari growled.

“A-Akari?”

Another boy said, his tone slightly shaky and wavering.

“I said don’t hey Akari me? Don’t associate me with assholes like you! Urgh! You guys are the real pathetic ones! Bringing down everyone just because you think your better! Honestly! You guys’ fucking disgust me!”

“Akari we were just joking…”

“Joking??? Don’t give me that shit! You guys are a pathetic waste of space! You don’t know how much Hina’s life is worth more than all of yours!”

She continued a stream of heavy insults until she eventually huffed and walked away. The boys stood there as dumbfounded as I was.

T-there’s no way she defended me out of the good of her heart, right? Y-yeah! that’s right! She defended me only to keep up her image of the perfect popular girl! That’s got to be it! N-no way she would defend a loser for me because she actually cared.

The rest of the day was a blur which seemed to whiz past me. Before I knew it, it was the end of school.

The next day, the lunch bell rung, signalling the start of lunch. I slowly and cautiously stepped through the hallways to my usual lunch spot, looking around to make sure no one was here. as expected, it was dead silent. I exhaled a sigh of relief as I clutched harder to the can of soda I was holding in my hand. I had spent 10 minutes in the local Lawson, debating on which flavour of soda she preferred. I had stared at the rows of soda in the Lawson fridge, my palms sweating. What does Akari even like? W-what would a popular girl like her even like? Grape? No…Lemon? Too sour…Cola? Too basic… In the end I chose melon soda. The safest choice, I thought. Who doesn’t like melon soda?

I anxiously anticipated for Akari’s arrival. I knew she would come searching for me every lunch in my usual spot. That was the type of person she was. Sure enough, after a short wait, Akari peeked her head around the corner, and her eyes met with mine. I suddenly froze up again, like my body was suddenly turned to stone. My breathing hitched, and I could only stare at her brainlessly. I could feel my heart beating faster.

“Oh! Hina! You’re actually here today!”

“Y-yeah…”

“So… you’re going to start having lunch here again like usual?”

I nodded meekly. She responded with a genuine smile.

“H-here… I wanted to give you this.”

I reached my arm out, still holding the can of melon soda.

“M-melon soda?”

I nodded vigorously.

“I-I know you don’t actually like drinking coffee…Y-you told me u drank it only to appear more mature. S-so here!”

I thrust my arm out again.

“I-I know deep down you want to drink this!”

Akari stood there, dumbfounded.

“T-this is thanks for yesterday.”

“Oh. I see.”

She slowly came to her senses again. When she did, a small smile slowly spread into a big genuine grin.

“W-wow thanks…you really don’t know how much this means to me”

“I-I wish I could give more! B-but… I don’t have a lot of – ”

“No.”

She shushed me with a quick and sharp retort.

“This is more than enough… thank you so much”

H-huh? I thought to myself. She’s lying. There’s no way a measly can of soda is enough for a girl like her, much less one from a loser like me. I slowly looked up, but I was only met with a genuine expression of joy.

“T-thank you Hina. Really.”

I sat there in class later, my mind racing with questions again. I could not focus on the class again, my mind clouded once again with doubts and questions about Akari. Why was she so happy? All I gave her was a can of soda. S-she was probably laughing at how shit of a gift it was right? Yea that’s it! T-there’s no way she actually appreciated the gift…

“I’m home.”

I closed the door behind me and changed back into my home slippers. Hana approached me with her usual smug expression.

“What were you doing this morning~?”

“N-nothing! Going to school!”

“Oh really~? I saw you at Lawson. It looked like you were looking hard for a gift. For a boy, perhaps~?”

I felt a blush creep up again.

“W-what! No! Idiot!”

I spattered out.

“Oh, come on~ you don’t have to lie to your big sis…I’ll keep it a secret from mom you know~”

“Just shut up!”