Psycho bald lady

I stood nervously once more before the guards as I showed them my phone.

"Hey, sexy. I'm your favorite goth bitch, Momo-chan, and today... I'm gonna shave my head AND eyebrows BALD!" the me in the video giggled.

Forcing that smile was a pain in the ass, let me tell you.

As the me in the video flicked on the clippers and drove them towards her hairline, the video suddenly jumped scenes. Now the me in the video had just finished lathering her head and eyebrows with shaving cream.

"Sorry, my stupid battery died, and I only noticed just now. But don't worry, you're just in time for the smoothening and the shaving cream," the me in the video smirked as she attempted to jiggle her b for beautiful b-cup breasts.

I can't believe I sunk to such humiliating cringe. It better not be in vain, dammit, but I can tell the guards are looking skeptical under those thick shades. This is my gamble. And it begins with me scraping a safety razor against my head and eyebrows.

The guards watched silently as the me in the video scraped away the shaving cream, revealing the hairless scalp beneath. Once that was all done, it was time to play my trump card.

"Kyaaah! Momo's all smooth bald, n' browless. Bet ya now want to make your girlfriend just as smooth as me, if you actually had one that is. Now as a bonus, I'm gonna trim my lashes down to go for the REALLY bald look!" the me in the video smirked as she grabbed some scissors and got in close so her eyes took up the focus.

She then trimmed her eyelashes as short as possible, all on camera. That was the key to all this. After that was done, the me in the video blew a kiss, committing one final act of cringe, before the video ended.

"So? Can I pass?" I trembled.

The guards remained silent, gazing intently at my now hairless state. "... Good enough. You only shaved, and didn't wax, laser, or lather yourself in depilatory cream like Mr. Ookley prefers female guests and prospective employees to do, but we failed to mention that as Madam Chainsly said a shaved head and eyebrows along with trimmed eyelashes was to be the bare minimum. You are free to come and go as you please.

I nodded, but didn't let my guard down for a second. No way I was gonna risk losing my hair after what I had just done to save it.

I entered to find a receptionist, a miserable looking woman without a single hair on her head. She was garbed in designer apparel, and had propped her feet on the desk, staring intently at her sparkly sneakers, perhaps seeing if she could see her bald reflection in them, and then the reflection of them from her head. I don't know why the thought crossed my mind, but maybe it has something to do with the "Reflexception" sign hanging above the desk.

Seriously, this company makes you shave your head and eyebrows just to enter, and it can't even spell "Reception" right? No wonder the poor girl's miserable, but I don't care about her. In fact, the least contact with folks, the better.

But as I made my way to the directory, the receptionist suddenly launched herself over the desk, and front flipped over to me.

"Heeeeeey. Whatcha doin here?"

Her tone was unsettling. It was like a typical miserable office lady mixed with a peppy extrovert. Worse, she was forcing a smile, which coupled with her makeup and hairless state, terrified me.

"J- Just here to see Ookley," I stuttered.

The narrowing of her gaze terrified me.

"Now that's funny. I'm the receptionist here, and there ain't no appointments in the schedule. You lyin'?"

I don't like this at all. This bitch is creepy, and possibly on to me. If she finds out about my hair, I don't even want to imagine what bald fetishist fantasy I'll be subjected to as punishment.

"Ya know, this job sucks. They made me shave my head, my eyebrows, pluck out my eyelashes, then WAX it all TOO! Ah, everyone mocks me. And what do I get in return? ..."

"..."

"... AHEM! I'm askin' you to take a guess, or are ya tryin' to land a date with my fist?"

"Y- You wouldn't hit a lady... would you?" I nervously blurted out.

An unsettling smile spread across the woman's face. "Nothing wrong with woman to woman SKIN CONTACT!" she cackled as her hand lunged for my head.

Instinctively, I swatted away her hand, but said hand soon found itself grasped in the woman's wrist.

"Oi, oi, you tryin' to swat away an officer of the law? Resistin' is a crime ya know," she chuckled as she licked her lips.

Forget the bozos at the front, this psycho's the true security guard! Or maybe it's the other way around; those bozos are meant to keep this psycho from leaving and us safe from her. That's why they require you to shave your head, so that no one will bother coming in. Screw the world, I'm not dealing with this psycho to save it. Heck, my heart's beating so fast I could die at any second from a heart attack. And if I go, doubt the bitch queen will be able to save the world. Wonder what her and Akane-

"HELLO! You tryin' to shut down on me!?" the psycho shouted, slamming my hand into the wall.

Pain, I could feel immense pain, and blood. There was red blood. I think my knuckle had been broken. I didn't know for sure, but in a situation like this, screaming was at the top of my protocol.

But my voice hit the pause button as the psycho whipped something out of her pocket with her free hand, and held it too her face.

"Well you sure quieted down fast, but we have a no shouting policy, and I'm SUCH a stickler for the rules. And do you know what we do as punishment?" the psycho asked as she licked her lips.

"You tattoo them?"

The psycho smiled and flicked on the tattoo gun she was holding. "DAMN RIGHT! And for sucking up, I'm gonna make your punishment EXTRA gruesome!"

"WHAT THE HELL!? Why should I get punished for answering something correctly!?"

The psycho's eyes narrowed. "Hierarchy, the one at the top can do what they want, no matter what. If you're a bootlicker that does what I want, but I feel like killin' you anyway despite the fact that it'll increase my workload, I do it. Point is, you're food. And I can choose to eat you any way I please. Now, how about we try inkin' your teeth. Always wanted to see what would happen if I tried it on a girl. Oh, just imagining you bursting into blood... AH!"

FUCK! Fuck it all! Fuck those doomers for souring the mood, fuck that creep for drugging me, and fuck that creep's friends, especially that fucking orange gorilla, for luring me here!

As the psycho licked her lips once more and began to slowly aim the tattoo gun towards me, the stupidest words escaped my lips. "Just lick the tattoo gun already, ya psychotic freak!"

I don't know why I said that, but I did, and now the psycho looked even more pissed.

"Oh? I scarin' ya shitless? Well good!" she maniacally grinned as she brought the tattoo gun up to her mouth, and slowly extended her tongue towards it's tip.

A brief wave of hope began to overtake me, but it fizzled out just as quickly as I noticed her holding her tongue, refusing to extend it out any further. She wasn't stupid, she was smart and sadistic, the worst kind of combo. But I was not going to die here.

Mustering all my courage, I headbutted the psycho's hand, sending the tattoo gun into her tongue and mouth. And thankfully, she screamed in pain and released me on instinct. The only problem was that the guards were storming in, so I had to run further in. At least I knew where the weirdos offices were, and you can bet I'll be ending the world for those creeps for what they've put me through!