The Ones I Love

A flash of silver-steel and white feathers leaping over the palace gate answered Humphrey's call. The figure, a knight clad in silver-steel plate from head to toe just shorter than me, landed and stood in a rigid straight pose of attention knights and soldiers took when in front of a superior. The short knight's helm was adorned with white feather plumes that swayed in the autumn wind and had a closed pointed visor that reminded me of a rat's face. The only gaps in the knight's armor were the two thin slits for their eyes and the series of small holes that littered the bottom of their helm's short snout, which I assumed were there to help the knight breathe in their metal casing. Like the Captain and the other knights, a single sword hung at Esther's hip, though theirs was shorter to match their stature.

"Ladies, this is Esther, my second in command," Captain Humphrey said, his face beaming with pride, his voice tinged with affection. "She'll be escorting you for the duration of your stay at the palace. If you need anything, please look to her for guidance."

The knight, Esther, stood static through the introduction, facing us like a tiny ornamental suit of armor. If it weren't for the slight rise and fall of their shoulders as they breathed, I would have thought they were just that.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Esther," Yssa said, giving the knight a courteous smile and bow. To my surprise, Esther returned the greeting with the slightest of nods before resuming their rigid stance.

"You'll have to forgive her," Humphrey said with a boisterous laugh. "Esther isn't much for conversation, but I assure you that you couldn't be in better hands. Now, Esther, please escort these young ladies to the audience chamber parlor so they can rest before their audience with His Majesty."

"AT ONCE, SIR!"

I flinched at Esther's muffled, yet somehow deafening response that shattered the image I had been building of her in my mind. In my imagination, she had been a short, beautiful, but shy dame hiding within the silver-steel shell and her voice had been mature and sultry. The complete opposite of what sounded like an obnoxious teenage boy.

"LADIES, IF YOU WOULD DO ME THE HONOR OF ALLOWING ME TO GUIDE YOU."

"Y-yes, that would be lovely," Yssa responded, apparently also thrown off by the disparity between Esther's body language and her odd penchant to yell when speaking. She maintained the polite smile she had plastered on since stepping forward as our impromptu representative, though I could still see a hollowness in her dull blue eyes.

Seemingly ignoring Yssa, Esther turned to Captain Humphrey and slammed her armored forearms together vertically with balled fists. The clang of the salute echoed through the cold, arid air and I could tell the Captain was pushing down another laugh as he returned the salute with a casual one. Once finished, the gate behind them swung ajar, leaving a gap just large enough for us to walk through before it clanged shut behind us. Several guards stood stiffly on the other side and saluted Esther as she passed, each wearing a warm smile that our escort either didn't notice or ignored.

She's so strange. It's clear all the knights respect her, though it feels more like a family doting on its youngest child than acknowledgment of a superior. I wonder how old she is. Maybe she's the Captain's daughter? Either way, Yssa seems to be a bit more talkative right now, so maybe she won't blow me off if I say something.

"Thanks for taking charge back there, Yssa," I said softly as we followed behind Esther. "I guess growing up as an aristocrat has given you a lot of practice interacting with people like this."

"Is that how it looks?" Yssa's rhetorical response was curt, sending me a clear warning to abandon the conversation.

"Y-yeah. I was really impressed. Maybe you can teach me your tricks sometime."

A subtle scoff is all I received in response before Yssa picked up her pace and placed herself in front of me and Remmi.

"Allow her some more time," Remmi whispered, leaning down to me. "She clearly wants to face whatever is bothering her alone, so we can only wait patiently until she is prepared to talk."

"But it's been a week. If she would just tell me what's going through her head, I'd be satisfied. This can't all be from our jokes. She's not hypocritical enough to get so upset by that when we joke about you together, too."

Remmi let out a sarcastic gasp and gave me a comforting grin before straightening herself out and looking at the massive open courtyard to the side of the pathway we were traveling down. From outside of the gates, the palace and its grounds had seemed uninspiring, but now that we'd passed through, everything seemed grander and more refined. The buildings that had seemed so humble a few minutes before loomed over me. The building that had seemed barely larger than the Grand Sorcerer's Cathedral now looked double its size and I struggled to think of how it was possible. To my knowledge only illusion or spatial magic could create such distortions, but both would require an unrealistic amount of Aethik energy to maintain. Boundary stones like the ones at the Royal Academy might be capable, but even with every mage in the Humonon kingdom it would be impossible to keep such stones charged.

Even with the scaled up size of the palace, it didn't take us long until we stood at the foot of the prodigious spired building. I couldn't restrain my sigh of relief when we entered and I reveled in the warmth, removing my mittens rubbing my icy hands together as I took in the overwhelming display of wealth present in just the hallway. Aside from the shining polished marble floor with diamond patterned granite accents, the walls of the hallway were decorated with exquisitely detailed oil paintings of battles and historical figures, busts of people I assumed were important, and other decorations that flaunted the kingdom's wealth. On the left side of the hallway were stained glass windows that obscured what appeared to be a courtyard with a small garden and a fountain that was twice as tall as Remmi.

"IN HERE."

Esther held open a thick dark-toned wooden door and ushered us into a room as posh as the hallway. In the center of the room were two sofas that each looked like they cost more than my home village's combined yearly income with a gold inlaid table table between. A three-tier stand loaded with various baked goods sat on the table and a dark-haired maid stood bowing on the side of the room next to a cart with a teapot and cups.

"IF YOU NEED ANYTHING, PLEASE INFORM THE MAID. I WILL BE IN THE HALLWAY STANDING GUARD."

Not waiting for a response, Esther stepped back into the hallway and closed the door behind her, leaving the three of us standing awkwardly in front of it. The maid remained bowing, her gaze glued to the burgundy carpet of the floor and I glanced at Yssa and Remmi for guidance on what to do next. Unsurprisingly, Remmi looked as uncomfortable as I did, though she masked it well behind the stoic expression of her facade.

"Lords above you two are…" Yssa's sentence faded to an exhausted sigh and she strode over to one of the sofas and sat down, her posture straight and her knees locked tightly together. By all accounts she looked at home in the position. If anything, she looked more in place sitting there than she ever had at the academy.

"How long do you think we'll have to wait?" I asked, testing the waters with Yssa again as Remmi and I sat down on the sofa across from Yssa.

"Who can say. Lady Venna is probably meeting with His Majesty as we speak, so I imagine it'll be after she's finished."

"Do you have any inclination as to the topic of their discussion?" Remmi chimed in while thanking the maid as she placed a steaming tea cup in front of her. Yssa shook her head and nodded at the maid when she received her cup. "The Headmistress hasn't given me any more information than what was shared with the two of you."

She seems to be opening up a bit. Maybe being stuck in here for a while is actually a blessing.

"Are you nervous?" I probed, taking a sip of the tea the maid had given me. It was hot, but not hot enough to burn my mouth and there was a sweetness to it even though there was no sugar added undercut with a hint of acidic fruitiness I couldn't identify.

"No," Yssa replied tersely, though her tone was slightly warmer than it had been the rest of the week. "Perhaps a little. I've never been to the royal palace before."

"Really? Not even for a ball or ceremony?"

"No. Given my family's… limited influence, we are rarely invited to events in the capital and on the few occasions we have been, I was at home watching over the domain and training with my master."

"I-I see. That's a shame. I think you'd be the center of attention if you went to a ball."

Yssa shrugged, but the slight relaxing of her shoulders told me my compliment had reached home. It was time to double down.

"Can you imagine it, Remmi? Yssa in a fancy light-blue gown adorned with silver and sapphire jewelry?"

"I can," Remmi replied, the side of her mouth twitching as she repressed the jealous look she always got when I complimented Yssa's appearance. "It would not be surprising if such an event were canceled due to the casualties of her stunning beauty."

Yssa's blue eyes narrowed at Remmi's praise, her uncertainty of whether Remmi's compliment was a passive aggressive jab or sincere evident.

"You can both stop buttering me up. I get it. I've been testy lately. You don't need to smother me with compliments to get on my good side."

"Then will you tell us what's wrong?" I said, jumping at the opportunity. "I've been so worried about you."

"It's nothing," Yssa sighed. "Some things I discussed with Lady Venna last week have just been weighing on my mind and it's been hard to…"

Then, like ice sitting out on a summer day, Yssa's cold demeanor melted and tears started to drip down her reddening cheeks. It didn't take long for her to regain her composure and the maid attending us was quick to bring her a handkerchief to tidy her face. Then, she finally told us: the consequences of absorbing the seed, the guilt she felt about the death of the other students, and the crippling anxiety she felt about her future. By the end, I had gone through three handkerchiefs myself and even Remmi's eyes were moist.

"I'm so sorry," I sniffled once Yssa had finished. "I didn't mean for anything like that to happen and if I'd known… I should have studied more on what golden seeds were rather than just their application. It's my fault."

"You shouldn't blame yourself," Yssa said with a resigned sigh. "I should have recognized it, too. While I'll admit I blamed you at first, I'm just as, if not more, responsible. If anything I should be apologizing for taking my emotions out on you."

"Yssa…"

Before I knew it I was sitting next to Yssa, squeezing her in my arms and sobbing like I was the one experiencing her cursed fate. Chuckling, Yssa embraced me back, stroking my fluffy windblown hair.

"I'll be fine, Alva. Just promise me that if I turn into a tree, you'll water me."

"Don't say that!" 

"Of course."

I shot a swollen eyed glare at Remmi as we responded at the same time, eliciting a warm laugh from Yssa that reverberated through my body. Already I could feel the Yssa I knew and loved coming back and it didn't take long for Remmi and I to join in.

This all happened because I've been selfish these past two years. If I'd paid more attention, not taken them for granted… There's no way I'd be able to live with myself if I let something happen to them. The dragon, Venna… She was right. I'm nothing but a hindrance right now. I need to be the one to protect them.