Volume 2 – Chapter 23: The Decision

The days after our conversation ran into one another. But the urgency we had felt in the moment of decision hadn’t loosened: If anything, it only grew. The world at large forced us to do so, as well.

Rika and I got straight to work. It wasn’t for the ceremony, though that was a vapid thought when a chaotic world had collapsed. Not big plans, no time to plan, and not a moment to lose. We didn’t need a ceremony to make this real. We didn’t want to have a party or celebrate. What we knew we needed instinctively was one another, and of it, in that moment, we needed now.

We sat with our families, discussing next steps, the reality of our situation. We were heavy with words, but it was the right thing to do. The pretending was no longer in effect. There was little illusion that the world was going to get better. No pretending that things would go back to normal. Everyone knew the truth, but no one was ballsy enough to say it out loud.

The world was falling apart. But here, there was a sliver of power, this was something we could take: this love that was one thing that could never be snatched from us.

As my father, still wrapping his head around the fact that we were alive, was ambivalent about the choice. He tried to play a show of plenty, but I could sense the yardage when he talked about his concerns. It wasn’t that he didn’t want us to be happy — he just didn’t want us to leap into something, which in his mind could be a huge mistake. But when he met Rika’s gaze, and saw the resolve there, he softened. And I know that even if he wasn’t down with it, he got what we were doing. We didn’t have to justify ourselves to him anymore. He knew.

Rika’s mother was also doubtful. She was cautious, always a bit more practical, and while she wanted us to be happy in as much as she cared, she worried about what could happen if we moved too fast. But at last, the silent observer, Rika’s father, finally spoke. He spoke few words, but it was enough.”

“You do not require our permission,” he began, his tone level but strong. “If that’s what both of you want, we support you.”

It was the push we needed. Our families didn’t only understand — they supported. They knew it wasn’t just some random act of pure impulse we had. They saw what we saw: a bond that can’t be denied, a love that can’t be extinguished, despite the circumstances in which we find ourselves.

The next step was to find a place and that was easy. We couldn’t be married in some beautiful location anywhere, and there was no time for all the customary details. But we didn’t care about that. What mattered was the act, the devotion to one another, the promise that whatever lay ahead, we would tackle it, together.

We just wanted to do something small — just our families, just us.” The ceremony will be intimate, personal and real. We didn’t need a bunch of friends or a party to realize how serious our commitment was to each other. We simply needed one another, in front of the people who mattered the most in our lives, making a promise we would never break.

A quiet thrill hung in the air as we did the little preparations. It was not the sort of excitement you’d associate with a wedding. There were no flowers, no haute gowns and tuxedos. But it didn’t matter. The simplicity of it all made it seem even more real.

The morning before the wedding — coming too soon, as if the very world were impatient with us, wanted us sedan strapped into the car seat of life, and running. I stood out in front, the low morning light casting strange shapes of shadow on our lawn, my hands trembling with anxiety. And it wasn’t the marriage that made me nervous — that was fine. Outside was as unstable as ever, and there was so much we still didn’t know. But today — this day, this moment — was ours.

It seemed that in that moment, when Rika came to the door and her eyes fell on me, everything else dissipated. The clothes were simple, just a plain little dress, but it was beautiful in its simplicity. She didn’t want anything big or extravagant. She was beautiful the way someone you love very, very much can be, and when she came toward me, my heart raced, a mini explosion, excitement and angst and pleasure.

“You’re here,” I said softly, unable to stop grinning.

“I’m here, indeed,” she said quietly, shaken but calm. “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

We each just looked at each other for a moment, and then I took her hand. The air felt as if the earth was still, catching its breath. No music, no ceremony, just two people and their families witnessing a promise that no catastrophe could take from them.

“I, Kaito, take you, Rika,” I recited, my tone unwavering; it did not sound as I felt, an overwhelming emotion flooded me. “I choose you, not only as my partner in this life, but as my partner in whatever comes next. No matter what the world has to throw at us, I promise to hold your hand.”

Rika’s eyes twinkled, her face soft but resolute. She gripped my hand tightly, then she said, her voice as firm as mine.

“I, Rika, take you, Kaito,” her voice sounded, filled with a strength I admired more than anything. “And I vow, no matter how the world may fall apart, I will stand by your side. We will meet whatever comes, together. We’ll make it through.”

It wasn’t even a formal ceremony, but it was the most important moment of my life. It doesn’t need fancy vows or grand promises. And all we had was each other, and the firm conviction that no matter what happened next, we would face it as one.

We didn’t celebrate with dinner afterward or a big party after the ceremony. We decided to stand there, hands clasped in the garden for a few seconds and breathe. To relish the tranquility of the present, confident in the fact that we had been ready for whatever the future asked us of ourselves.

The world was falling apart. But finally, we had something definitive.

Together.