Like a Conveyor Belt…

Every moment in time could be a person. You could get to know that person for just that moment, but then comes the next one in the following moment. There’s a line of people that goes on so far out to where they start to look like ants, and that is also a line of moments.

Once you leave one of them, they are in the past. They are just people who you had a small, insignificant encounter with. Nothing more.

I can’t let go. Even if that’s true, I just can’t. I want those moments back. I’m trying to make it seem like they don’t matter to me, but they do.

Each person can make you feel something, some more than others. At times, I felt pain as I interacted with them. It was the type of pain that made you wish that the line would simply cut off then and there.

It’s okay—I don’t care about those anymore.

There were other moments that were so much better. They were the ones that made me fall in love.

You can see beauty, like when rays of sunlight grace the surface of clear water. But you can feel it as well. Like when your head slowly falls onto the shoulder of the one you love, as you both enjoy those same, warming rays of sunlight pouring through the window.

That’s how it felt to meet the people of those moments.

I want to keep talking about this, no matter how sad it makes me feel.

You can only look back at those moments and remember. That’s it. Isn’t it depressing? It’s not like I want to go back in time, though.

I just want to feel those emotions again.

Recently, I managed to get my hands on my favorite childhood candy. I remembered it as a smooth, silky chocolate that melted away in your mouth, then surprised you with a burst of sweet caramel. I couldn’t get rid of the ear-to-ear smile that so plainly showed my excitement. Then I ate the candy.

It just wasn’t the same.

That’s how it would be to travel back in time and relive my best memories. Maybe I’d even grow to hate them after a while. I don’t want to hate them.

I don’t want to admit that I want the impossible. My heart will have a thorn in it if I do, and I won’t know how to remove it. It’ll be so incredibly painful as it leaks out tears of blood, all from thinking of the truth. Nobody can bear that, so please, grant me my wish.

Those moments…

The ones that I wished would last forever.

The ones that granted me peace of mind.

The ones that I wouldn’t mind being the last.

I want them back. I want them back so, so, so badly.