Chapter 12:


Extracurriculars 怪獣教師

Not unlike every protagonist ever, I do have a tragic backstory of sorts. The multitude of events that make up said tragic backstory, however, are not the reason I am acting how I am in the present. I found fighting to protect Ms. Kamiya from any potential dangers to be a good reason. That is all.Bookmark here

It's not like I developed feelings for Ms. Kamiya because she rescued me from a group of bullies, or she was the only one who cared for me out of all the people in my life who acted like I didn't exist, or anything like that. Some of that stuff did occur, but I think I'm stretching the truth a little bit when I say that. I'm fairly certain that my feelings for her were the result of pure chance and nothing more, but I will not deny that my past (significance debatable) might have influenced that. I will continue to contest that notion until I can know for sure that I'm wrong, though. Inotani Takuya, the man of everything and nothing, does not deny obstinance as one of his worst personality traits.Bookmark here

I recognized in an instant the girl in the video that had become the most viral thing since Nyan Cat. I knew who I was dealing with because, well, If I were to tell you my past in full, you'd be hearing a lot about her. You might get bored of the same old "tragic backstory" trope first though. I was previously involved with the girl in the video. You don't need to know much else right now. You're not missing out on anything right now, I promise.Bookmark here

『You're avoiding bringing up the subject of your past so you can stretch it out into a multiple-chapter story arc later, right? It's overdone, but I won't stop you.』Bookmark here

"Akua! Don't just appear out of nowhere and start making meta-commentary!"Bookmark here

『I didn't just appear. I'm always here. I exist inside your head.』Bookmark here

She had me beat with that. But-Bookmark here

"You still can't break reader immersion like that!"Bookmark here

I said.Bookmark here

『Look, now you're doing it.』Bookmark here

She said.Bookmark here

"You started it."Bookmark here

『That doesn't change the fact that you're now part of the problem.』Bookmark here

"Aha, so you admit you're a problem!"Bookmark here

『I will admit that the meta-commentary is a problem. Calling me a problem is a bit too far, wouldn't you say? It's quite rude.』Bookmark here

"You're not real, so I have no guilty conscience about that."Bookmark here

『You say that now, but you won't be once I am real.』Bookmark here

"In your - er, my dreams. Your fate is to remain trapped in my consciousness forever."Bookmark here

『We'll see about that.』Bookmark here

Whether or not I stretch my past into an entire story arc is none of her business.Bookmark here

Anyway.Bookmark here

"I'm assuming you've either been kicked out of the school, or you left for your own safety or something, or some other reason I haven't thought of. We'll head to the school when it's usually in session because it would be harder to walk around in the dark."Bookmark here

"Good idea. Let's wait here until morning."Bookmark here

How about let's not?Bookmark here

I could think of many reasons why Nishioka staying here is a horrible idea.Bookmark here

I need sleep.Bookmark here

It's not even two in the morning.Bookmark here

I don't want uninvited guests in my house.Bookmark here

I don't want Nishioka in my house.Bookmark here

Ms. Kamiya could sneak into my house at any moment (not that I mind).Bookmark here

Nishioka might snore.Bookmark here

I like to be alone in my home (Ms. Kamiya being the exception)Bookmark here

My bed only has room for one person.Bookmark here

"Not if we cuddle!" Nishioka said.Bookmark here

"Why are you so enthusiastic about that? It's incredibly out of character- hey! Don't read my mind like that!"Bookmark here

"I'm not reading your mind, I'm just reading the chapter. Look." She claimed as she handed me a printed document.Bookmark here

"Where did you even get this? Everything so far has been way too meta! Forget you ever saw this!" I retorted exasperatedly and threw the paper out the window.Bookmark here

"What did you do that for? We needed that! The rest of the plot is gone now! What are we supposed to do?"Bookmark here

"We'll just act according to what we already know. Anyway, stop being meta, and go home!"Bookmark here

"I don't want to."Bookmark here

"GO. HOME."Bookmark here

"My home is wherever you are." she said with an incredibly cliche sweet-sounding voice and a puppy-eyed expression.Bookmark here

"Nice try, but this bed only has room for one."Bookmark here

"Like I said, not if we cuddle."Bookmark here

"Not happening."Bookmark here

"What, afraid of a little intimacy with an older woman? Don't worry, I don't bite." She said in an incredibly tacky seductive tone and cliche seductive look.Bookmark here

"Actually, if there's one thing I am not afraid of, it's that. It's just that I'm not looking for intimacy with you right now. In fact, I'm hoping there's soon going to be some intimacy between you and the window you came in from. So leave."Bookmark here

"But i don't have anywhere to go."Bookmark here

"Somehow I don't believe you."Bookmark here

"It's true."Bookmark here

"Where did you come from?"Bookmark here

"That window." Nishioka said as she pointed to the only window in my room.Bookmark here

"Before that." I replied, annoyed.Bookmark here

"My house."Bookmark here

"Then go there!"Bookmark here

"I can't."Bookmark here

"Why not?" I questioned her aggressively.Bookmark here

"One of the student groups took it over and turned it into a base."Bookmark here

"They're taking territory outside of the school now? This really is bad- wait, that's not the issue here. You're telling me that you headed here after your house got raided and taken over, in the middle of the night, and you expect me to believe this has nothing to do with the screws I got in my back earlier?"Bookmark here

"It's all just a big coincidence, I swear. Crazy, huh?"Bookmark here

"Whatever. You can stay here tonight. But you have to sleep on the floor or the couch over there. I'm sorry I don't have anything better."Bookmark here

"You could let me on the bed."Bookmark here

"No."Bookmark here

"Come on. You know you want to."Bookmark here

"I really don't."Bookmark here

"I don't believe you."Bookmark here

"Believe it."Bookmark here

"Why not?"Bookmark here

"You clearly don't understand how you look or sound right now. Whatever. Can I trust you not to be weird?"Bookmark here

"I promise not to be weird."Bookmark here

She was going to keep pestering me about it, and I wasn't willing to put up with it. I also knew I would feel nothing if she were to get close, so I decided to just let her do what she wanted, so my life would be easier.Bookmark here

So I shuffled to the side of my bed and was laying back down and-Bookmark here

"Why are you naked?" I shouted at Nishioka.Bookmark here

"I always sleep in the nude."Bookmark here

"You already crossed the line of what's appropriate when you snuck into my house. Letting you sleep on my bed is crossing is also already really bad. Do you want to make it worse?"Bookmark here

"I've already gone this far, so why stop?"Bookmark here

"Your logic is seriously flawed."Bookmark here

"Whatever. Don't you like what you see?"Bookmark here

She does have a nice body with just the right proportions and is extremely well endowed.Bookmark here

"...While I won't deny that I do, I'd still like you to put your clothes back on. You're not getting on the bed until you do."Bookmark here

"Fine, but you're really a buzzkill, you know that?"Bookmark here

"Hey, I was having a pleasant evening up until I got attacked with a flourish of screws. You're the buzzkill."Bookmark here

"That's debatable."Bookmark here

"Just put your underwear back on and get in bed. I'll lend you some really oversized pajamas."Bookmark here

"Here I come. Don't do anything too naughty now..." Nishioka said as she jumped in the bed and her skin began to rub up against mine.Bookmark here

"I should be telling you that." I retorted as we fell asleep. And so we slept through the remainder of the night without incident. As far as I know. I'm not going to question why she was naked with her arms around me when I woke up. She didn't make me feel any type of way so it wasn't my concern.Bookmark here

Nevertheless, morning had come, and we were heading toward the school.Bookmark here

"By the way Nishioka, who attacked me with the screws?"Bookmark here

"Don't worry about it. You'll meet them eventually."Bookmark here

"I think I have every right to worry about it considering I was assaulted, but whatever."Bookmark here

We made haste to the school. As soon as we arrived at the front gate, Nishioka spoke up.Bookmark here

"Well, well, well. I don't feel so bad about this situation now that I know you've been kicked out too, Atsuko. Were they too much for you to handle on your own?"Bookmark here

A second female voice responded to hers. "Didn't the same happen to you, granny? I can't think of any reason why you would have brought my fiancee here other than that."Bookmark here

"I'm not that old!" Exclaimed the old woman. "I'm not even in my thirties yet."Bookmark here

Whatever was about to happen between Nishioka and Tenjouin, who had found herself in a predicament similar to ours, would certainly not be pretty. It would also probably be a waste of time which I expected nothing fruitful to come from. So I didn't want them to start fighting.Bookmark here

"Did you get kicked out too, Tenjouin?" I asked, defusing the bomb set by Nishioka and Tenjouin, however, I had inadvertently set one of my own.Bookmark here

"I did not get kicked out," Tenjouin started as she turned to look at me. "I opted for a strategic retreat to further analyze the severity of the situation."Bookmark here

I think I knew what Tenjouin was actually saying, but I asked Nishioka to run a translation by me just to make sure. She's quite good at interpreting what people really mean.Bookmark here

"She got surrounded by a bunch of students and had to GTFO, or else she was going to get destroyed."Bookmark here

Just as I thought.Bookmark here

But wait, "GTFO"? She does know this isn't a chatroom, right? Who uses texting abbreviation slang in a real conversation? If someone told a funny joke, and I said "LOL" instead of laughing, I'd get my ass kicked right then and there.Bookmark here

I suppose it's not a big deal to overlook that for now, but if it's a habit of hers I'll definitely have to come back to that later.Bookmark here

"So you're both in the exact same situation. I wonder who would've seen this coming?" I said, sarcastically.Bookmark here

"It's a very unfortunate situation, but all should be well soon now that you're here." Tenjouin said to me, seemingly in relief.Bookmark here

I responded "What do you expect me to do? Did you think I'd be powerful enough to clear out every single caster that's in here? I'm not strong enough to clear out even one classroom, let alone one caster."Bookmark here

"Bullshit." Nishioka and Tenjouin firmly said together in unison.Bookmark here

"Listen here, Takuya." Nishioka scolded me. "I might not know you very well, but I witnessed exactly what you can do."Bookmark here

"That was a fluke. I just wanted to do something and ended up being able to because of sheer luck."Bookmark here

Nishioka explained that it couldn't have been a fluke as she pointed up at the school building.Bookmark here

"You think you did that by coincidence? You blew a massive hole in the side of the second floor. That doesn't happen accidentally."Bookmark here

Actually, it does. Quite often. There's a shocking amount of people out there that are just the right blend of clumsy and stupid to make stuff like this happen around them without even trying. The most dangerous of this type are the people who have an added hint of ignorance.Bookmark here

"You're not convincing him of anything." Tenjouin dismissed Nishioka and began speaking.Bookmark here

"If you don't believe us, I'll show you something that you can't deny. Takuya."Bookmark here

"Yes?" I replied.Bookmark here

"There's a way to measure the base strength of a Caster. There's a low-level Cast that any beginner Caster can do. It requires no skill or training. When you're ready, Push your arm outward and completely open up your hand away from you at the same time. But hurry up. We only have so long until the people inside realize that we're outside. It's not much longer until we become sitting-"Bookmark here

A deep green flare appeared before me and exponentially grew in size as it traveled toward the building. The impact was possibly the brightest and loudest thing I had ever heard. It's an interesting technique Tenjouin had there.Bookmark here

"...Ducks."Bookmark here

"...Ahem," Tenjouin resumed. "There you have it. You're incredibly strong as you are right now with no skills or training. I can only imagine how much of a threat to humanity you'll be when you're as strong as you can get. But we'll deal with that once we get there. That's the most basic destruction Cast there is, and you've released it with enough power to match some of the most advanced destruction casts. And you didn't even try. Are you feeling confident in yourself now?"Bookmark here

"Not really," I replied to her attempt at getting me to do her hard work for her. I sure as hell wasn't going to do that. I don't care how strong I may be. This isn't a solo task. Those two weren't going to use me to get out of their responsibilities. "If I get overconfident and rush in on my own, I won't last five minutes before I'm ambushed. If I go in there and fire off Casts as fast as I can at everything that moves, I'll either be surrounded or expend all my energy because I wasn't being mindful of how much energy Casts use."Bookmark here

"Oh, fuck off dude! Look at that! The fourth floor is done for! That's not your average crater either, that's ground zero!" Nishioka said as she began to lose her composure.Bookmark here

"That most basic Cast is a static type. No matter how much power and effort you put into it, the energy expended will always be the same .amount." Tenjouin added, trying to rationally justify her lack of accountability and sway me into rushing in head-on.Bookmark here

"I don't care. I'm not going in there without backup."Bookmark here

"I can't handle all those kids in there, and I also don't want to work with her." Nishioka stated, and Tenjouin declared the same.Bookmark here

I wasn't hearing the excuses. "Listen. Either you guys are coming in there with me or I'm not going. If the latter happens, we're going to be eviscerated. Just work with me here."Bookmark here

"..."Bookmark here

"Are you guys really afraid of a bunch of kids?"Bookmark here

"We're afraid of fighting a bunch of kids alone."Bookmark here

"Well, you're not alone now. Here's my plan. We go in and get to our person of interest. We get our answers if there are any to get, then we clear out the rest of the school. We all get what we want, but once we do that, you two will have to resume your little war for authority over the school yourselves. I'm not getting involved in that. Sound good?"Bookmark here

"...Fair enough." Said Nishioka.Bookmark here

"Let's go." Said Tenjouin.Bookmark here

And so the temporary alliance between Tenjouin, Nishioka, and myself was formed. It may be held together by toothpicks and chewing gum, but I'll make it work.Bookmark here

If I can't make it work, then I can't get any evidence, and my elaborate conspiracy will remain just that forever. That could also happen even if our alliance does work out, but you know.Bookmark here

You miss every shot you don't take.Bookmark here

『The next chapter or two is a fight sequence by the way!』Bookmark here

This recurring meta-commentary is no longer funny. It's just annoying. Actually, it's irritating. Is it that hard to maintain immersion? Would it kill us to go one chapter without acting self-aware?Bookmark here

『See, you're doing it yourself again. It's fun, isn't it?』Bookmark here

Fu**!Bookmark here

Oh, I'm being censored now? Why are you even doing that? There's no reason for it! Well, guess what? I don't give a ****!Bookmark here

Really? You're going to fully censor the words now? This is flagrant misuse of censorship, so go **** yoursel-Bookmark here

Wait a minute, why does a beep sound come out of my mouth whenever I swear?Bookmark here

Is this Akua's doing? Can she even do that? That amount of power in her metaphorical hands is a scary thought to consider.Bookmark here

Is it some unknown entity that has power over my vocabulary? Who would want me to be silenced in any capacity? Wait.Bookmark here

I gasp.Bookmark here

Could it be-?Bookmark here

No, that's not possible. My involvement with them was ages ago.Bookmark here

If it is them, then basically, [CENSORED FOR READER SAFETY]Bookmark here

In what way is what I just said a threat to reader safety? Let me show you what a threat to reader safety really looks like. Ahem.Bookmark here

If you're [CENSORED FOR READER SAFETY], then feel free to [CENSORED FOR READER SAFETY], because I [CENSORED FOR READER SAFETY]. And that's not a threat, that's a promise.Bookmark here

I'm not serious about that of course, but it's a perfect example. Hopefully whoever's behind this can learn to censor appropriately, or just **** off.Bookmark here

Well, it doesn't matter who or what is causing this, or why. I only care about one thing.Bookmark here

This better be fixed by the next chapter or the author won't hear the end of it from me.Bookmark here

You can resume reading from this paragraph.