Great Advice usually comes from a Cult [Scene 14]

With all that's going on in production, and how little time I had left to cure the situation, I began to wonder what the hell I was doing in the middle of the desert following a woman named Arlene to find out information on a broken spaceship for my girlfriend. 

At this point, it should be obvious that I've had no time to think about what my now idiotic life had come to. Directing a parody space western that somehow became my biopic seemed a little too ironic for my taste. But underneath the bullshit, something Jada told me still rung true. Maybe I jumped to conclusions.

"In a room full of idiots, I prefer to stand out,"

"What are you mumbling about, boy?" Arlene interrupted, "It's customary to be quiet in a smoking lodge,"

"Since when?"

"Since now. You wanted information, so now we wait,"

"Wh-"

"Shhh!" An old man at the table next to me shushed. 

This whole saloon filled itself with older men in cowboy hats smoking cigars. Small, quaint and rather silent. Smoke filled the air as a lone bar with the few tables that covered the floor occupied fellow tobacco smokers like me. I had a big Cuban; the old lady gave me one and it made me feel like I just won some random sports championship. 

Yunaria waited outside due to the smell, but she loved the aroma of gasoline. To each their own, I guess. 

We sat like this for an hour in complete silence, puffing and doting on cigars. It gave me some time to think. Movies were a true passion of mine, they always were. I knew from an early age that I wanted to be a director. I went to college, graduated, got lucky and met the right people and there was Purple Lines, average by all standards. It was my first directed movie. I had potential. But the next two movies never really took off like I had hoped. Honestly, the aesthetic of me being an average director ironically made me way more famous than I would have liked. Space Cowboy Robot Love seemed like an easy cash grab. 

Something else drove me, maybe something I'd long forgotten about or ever wanted to think about. Respect. 

Arlene took a drag of her cigar, puffing all the smoke in the air when a person came from behind tapped them on the shoulder.  They said something in her ear and all she did was nod. 

Arlene turned to me and headed toward the door. "It's time."

I followed her out the door and saw Yunaria waiting outside. "That was quite a while," she turned to us, "Did you find out more about the spaceship?"

"No..." I trailed off, waddling behind this, never mind. I'll keep my evil thoughts, I won't let Ben and his imps influence me, no. 

There were no roads or pavement, and only small adobe houses lined the dirt pathway in front of us. We followed Arlene in a whirlwind maze of clay homes until we finally reached a standalone hut by itself with smoke filtering out of the house. I had a funny feeling. The last time I had one of these, I ended up working for a production team of banana suits. You see how that ended for me. 

Arlene looked at the both of us. "Our spiritual leader is very sensitive. It's very important that he feels safe and without judgement. You should understand," she glanced at Yunaria, "What even are you?"

"I am from Yalina-"

"You literally just judged her," I added, "No one's said anything to you,"

"Why would they? Are you implying something?" 

Who even is this spiritual leader anyway? What a fucking scam. I can't be wasting my time with this given all what's waiting for me when I get back home. Shit, I forgot. There's a hole in my roof. Add that with the 10,000 dollars' worth of debt and gasoline, Yunaria had cost me a fortune. But here I was, helping her trying to fix her spaceship. 

"No," I paused, "Why can't you just tell us why you were at the spaceship? I gave you two-hundred dollars...."

"Our spiritual leader is the one who sent me there. He said he had a premonition, and I should go check it out,"

"This sounds like a cult,"

"Oh? How would you know? What are cults even like? Those are just rumors,"

Rumors? I underestimated the sheer number of idiots in the world. They were abundant. Just when I thought I met the biggest one, another one spawned into the universe. 

“Anyways, just be respectful,” Arlene muttered, “He doesn’t speak, so I will be the interpreter. Smoking allows me to channel energy, it’s why we were at the smoke house,”

The door creaked open, letting smoke out the front. A woman appeared with a grand smile on her face and looked refreshed. She nodded at us and skipped down the road until she went out of sight. This was definitely a cult. 

We waded through the thick clouds and walked down a smokey hallway, reaching an opening that revealed a room with a man sitting on a purple mat. His eyes were closed, and he sat cross-legged on a small platform one step above the ground floor. Arlene nested right beside him, and he whispered something in her ear. Clearly, he could talk.  

Arlene spoke in a loud and clear voice. "Are you two the owners of that extraterrestrial vehicle, he asks,"

"It is my device," Yunaria responded, "Currently it is broken, and I was seeking advice on if you knew how to fix it. Can you help me?"

"Before I can help, it will be a small fee," Arlene answered in his stead. This was ridiculous. 

"Look, I already gave that idiot two-hundred dollars for taking me to this sweat shop. Just tell us what you know-"

Right as I was talking, I saw Yunaria open her metallic chest like a refrigerator and pulled two thousand dollars in cash and handed it to the man. What was she doing?!?! This man was a grifter. He sported a wide toothy grin with holes in them and turned to Arlene once again. 

"Thank you. I'm sure my boss, I mean, the Gods, will bless you with valuable information. Now, shall we begin?" Arlene said.

For some reason, it was faint, and I had no proof, but I just knew that damn coyote was behind this. 

***