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Murmurs spread through the villagers. Some with questions and others excitement. Cathlin presented a rather positive image of Her final message. No where was Termination mentioned to them. Did he plan to tell them anything or was it just going to be something that he kept to himself. They would have to meet with the other Priests and Speakers.

I looked back inside considering my options. However, someone I couldn’t see spoke up. “Announcement! Head Priest Cathlin, what must we do to pass Ministra’s test?” Oh? Is he going to answer or deflect?

“As is often the case, She speaks in ways that we can’t fully comprehend. The Speaker and I have yet to come to an agreement on the meaning. But we have the year to solve this. Together it will be solved as we have always done. When Her word is understood, we will reveal all. Be at ease knowing that Her light shines upon you all!”

Clever. I walked back inside even as the crowd leaned in wanting more from the Priest. So that’s how it was going to be. What would I have said if I had to give the speech? Part of me was certainly glad I didn’t have to do it. But was this truly the right way to go about it? We should be honest with them. They should know what She said.

Sitting down on the corner of a column’s base, I crossed my arms folding up. I could feel my heart starting to pound again. The words repeated in my mind. Each time they seemed to get heavier. I wasn’t going to be able to escape them. No one could escape them.

They should know. But who was right? Was Cathlin correct that there was a hidden meaning to find in a clear unambiguous message? Or was I right that She spoke directly with no subterfuge. Could he be right? I don’t know. My whole body rang with the increasing beat of my heart. It was making me ill.

My thoughts turned towards the outside. Glancing up from my knees, I saw through the hall a few of my village gathered around the three Priests. Genuine excitement seemed to be on their faces because they didn’t know the truth. I could almost feel their energy from here. My arms squeezed tighter.

Should they know? Is this what they have to do every year? It was less complicated last year. And not being part of the inner circle of the temple previously, I didn’t know what happened. The records only stated what the reading meant and Her words, not what was presented to the public. Had he lied before? Though I guess it was closer to withholding or only telling part rather than outright lying. Such a dangerous line to walk.

“Eshikra?”

“Mother?” Hearing her voice nearly made me cough as I jumped partly to my feet. I nearly missed my father standing next to her in my panic. I knocked my head against the column as it forced me fully up. “Father! What are you doing here?”

“We came to see you, dear. You weren’t giving Ministra’s word, so we thought you might be upset. Are you feeling okay?” She reached out for my hand taking it. “Dear, you’re shaking! I know you get scared in front of everyone.”

Do I tell them? I darted between my parents. I was an adult woman, I shouldn’t feel so weak right now. But I could really use a hug right now. Just some assurance it would all work out. I tightened a little onto her hand for support. What do I do?

Is it alright just to tell them? I’m carrying Her words in me. It felt like they needed to escape. They seemed to burn like coals in my belly. I wanted to throw up. I squeezed more onto her hand. I can’t believe how much I feel like a child right now. Is it because they’re staring at me or the words whispering in the back of my mind?

I stood up a little getting to my feet properly to face them even if I couldn’t stop the rattling. I need food. Opening my mouth, I paused trying to figure out what I should even say to them. They looked disappointed for me that I wasn’t out there and worried in equal measures. It was comforting, but do I shatter that? Can I do it? Should I do it? Do I need to do it?

Words didn’t come to me just yet. They almost choked or gagged me as I fought to pull one and toss another back. None of them made any sense to start. I couldn’t just say what She declared. It wouldn’t make any sense. I needed to start somehow.

Leaning a bit, I thought I had found a word, maybe even a sentence to begin with as they hung on my action. Their confused expressions only made it harder to start. And then I turned, thinking to collect my thoughts a little more.

Cathlin stood in the hall past the threshold. How long had he been there? Was he watching me? Geth and Flaita were at his side. What were they thinking? All I got was piercing stares with no words or reactions. Were they just being polite or questioning what I was doing? Were they scared that I would tell my parents the truth? Is that why they were standing there?

The moment those thoughts entered me I froze up. I looked back to mother and father. Could I not tell them after all? But they were family! I should be able to tell them in confidence right? But this is so big, do I have to think differently? Can I even do that? What did Ministra want me to do?

Someone tell me what I should do!

“Eshikra? You’re hot, are you ill?”

“M-mother? I…” I glanced back at the Priests again. They were talking between each other. What was it that they were saying? Were they talking about me? Were they going to be trying to remove me? Was I going to be a problem? Should I never have said what I did about Her message? What was the right choice?

I retreated as much as I could while my mother held my hand. The column didn’t really allow me room. And everything closed in on me. My breathing sped up faster and faster. The room felt like it was spinning and blurry. Words just sort of vanished in a soup.

Footsteps snapped around me. They got closer. I rocked forward seeing Cathlin behind father suddenly. My eyes went wide seeing him staring at us. What was he going to say? What would happen? What do I do?

“Announcement! Head Priest Calthin, Priest Geth and Priestess Flaita!” Father took a step back sensing their wish to join. He moved to mother’s right and closer to me. It didn’t make me feel any better even though it should.

Cathlin politely nodded to us, but looked at me again. What did he want? Damn, why can't I read what he wants to say? Say it! Then he just turned to my parents. Huh? “Announcement! Berthon, Alecia, morning. It’s good to see you on this momentous day.”

“Ministra’s reason lifts you, Head Priest.”

“May Her knowledge be your growth.”

“We were a little surprised. Sorry if we’re intruding, but our daughter looked unwell. I wanted to see that she was feeling better.”

“It’s only natural. She’s probably just nervous about what Ministra had set before her.”

They looked a little confused as did I, if I wasn’t already sweating from whatever that stare was. My job ended. At least in their eyes, since it was a riddle to understand. I had nothing before me as he put it.

“She hasn’t told you?”

“Eshikra?” They looked to me for an answer, but what would I say to them? I don’t know what he’s talking about. Unless they’re talking about Her divinity, but that didn’t feel like his meaning.

Cathlin clapped his hands together with a smile. “She probably was just trying to find the words to tell you. But Ministra’s final prophecy that she heard needs to be solved for us to prove ourselves worthy. And that can only be done together.” The elder suddenly shrank a little as though losing some height somehow. “I’m not as young as I used to be and can’t make the journey to Rastron. Eshikra will be going in our stead to help solve Ministra’s words. It’s a wonderful duty, your daughter has before her! Be proud!”

I’m going to Rastron?! You’re getting rid of me aren’t you?

What am I supposed to do?