Ego and greed

A week pass since I promise that to Evelyn, the post didn’t have anything relevant yet and we have been only hanging out if my room, I could see how Evelyn was getting used to the place and how to be with me, but she hasn’t given up in making me get out of my room, I could go now to the bathroom outside of my room without help.

She has helped a ton with the cleaning that I couldn’t help but lend her a hand the other day, I ended up exhausted, of just cleaning and tidying around but I would lie if I say that it didn’t bring me satisfaction.

My skin has improved and Evelyn finally cut my hair with some scissors that we ordered along with more clothes for both of us, she still a bit cautious about using the internet but I showed her whatever she wanted to see, her expressions always made me laugh though.

I was lying down on the floor while Evelyn rested in my bed, but I couldn’t sleep, I got up and went to the window, where I could see the stars, I looked down and looked at the street.

Two years and I finally decided to look at the street, I can’t believe it… I smiled and saw the streetlights and a person walking its dog, the mere sight of those two was almost unknown for me, it was really strange.

I guess no contact with other human beings in front of me really made my reality a bit messy… I looked at Evelyn and smiled. I’m glad she came to this world… but this has to end… I don’t like living in a fantasy, I would need to do something about myself by my own… no matter how much struggle it would take, I will do it for her… and for them…

I looked at my phone and saw the post and I read something.

“I love to explore abandoned caves and I just take a picture of something similar, if you are interested, feel free to dm me and I will send you the location… a bit of suspicious thought… but is all we had…”

“Azura?...”

I save my phone and look at Evelyn.

“Sorry, did I wake you up?”

I should probably not tell her until tomorrow

“No, I just… was dreaming about my brothers and sisters…”

I sit next to Evelyn and turn on the lamp.

“You miss them a lot, right?”

“Yeah, having peace is good but… I know they are worried about me and it makes it a bit anxious”

“Well, you already said it, if you can do nothing about now, you shouldn’t burn yourself with it”

“You really love using my own words in your favor, eh? Little bastard”

“What can I say?”

We both laughed and we stopped at the moment I touched Evelyn hand, I grabbed her and looked at her.

“Azura?”

“I miss my parents a lot… I know it is not the same, but… I do understand you…”

“You don’t have to-“

“I can’t run away forever… you see… two years ago…”

“AZURA, ARE YOU SURE YOU DON’T WANT TO GO WITH US?!”

That day, my mother was doing food before they left on a trip, they won a trip to a part far from here, they knew I wasn’t going to go with them so they made me something to eat that night.

“No, mom… I really appreciate it but I’m good, you two have fun, it has been some time since you and dad went on a trip on their own, right?’

“What a good son we have here, right, darling?”

“But I still want you to go with us…”

“University is a bit hard, mom…”

“You can go later, a lot of people in university take trips with their parents and they are all fine”

“Yeah, people with money”

“We are not poor, sweetie”

“And we are not rich either”

“Enough, enough”

My father stepped between the two of us and held my arm.

“Son, there are some things that might never be possible to you, maybe this is your only time going to a foreign country or maybe you can go to other places in the future, so I will ask you one more time, do you want to come with us, yes or not?”

I think about it a bit and look at my father.

“I’m good dad, you two enjoy the trip”

“Alright, son, take care”

Just a moment after that my parents leave the house while I was in my room, I was in the sofa and thinking about grabbing something to eat when I saw one article, a plane crashing, I panic a lot and call my parents but they didn’t answer, I thought it was because maybe the plane’s staff didn’t let them use their phones but everything went downhill when I heard the ring of my bell.

I didn’t want to go, I didn’t want to open the door, and I didn’t want to hear anything. I went and opened with the false illusion that it would be anything and not what I was thinking but it was.

“Azura Hito?”

“Yes…”

“We have bad news… your parents… they were caught in a malfunction in the plane that went a few hours ago… we found their bodies but… they are gone, I am sorry”

I nodded and let the men enter the place, they explain me what was going to happen, I listen them with a dead expression and when they leave, I just couldn’t believe it, I went to my room and shut inside it, I attend to the funeral that my parents had with the insurance and a lot of their colleagues said the same things to me I’m sorry for your lost, you look just like them, time will heal the wounds… stuff like that

When I come back from the funeral, I couldn’t see anything besides pure darkness and the constant emotion of grief, sadness, desperation, to be honest, I didn’t even know what I had but I just went straight to my room and didn’t eat for a whole week, I ordered boxes of couple noodles not because I was hungry, but because I knew that if continue that way I’ll probably die.

Not that I care that much, I was feeling guilty of the death of my parents, if only I went with them, I should have probably ended my own life to be with them, but I didn’t have the courage to do it so I started to live the way Evelyn found me.

“And now, I am ashamed of what I did, I want to move forward, but I am scared… a week ago these thoughts didn’t even exist but thanks to you Evelyn, now I can see a bit of light in my life…”

Evelyn was silent the entire time, I didn’t see her in the eyes since I was looking away, but when I saw her eyes, she was crying, a lot of tears were coming out of her eyes, going down her cheeks as her mouth tried not to let out any sound.

“E-Evelyn?”

Evelyn didn’t say anything and just hugged me gently, I couldn’t help but cry too and hold her strongly. No words were exchanged and we just slept together, the tears already made parts of the warmth and when we woke up, we were facing each other.

Evelyn smiled at me holding my chick as I smiled back to her.

“Thanks for sharing that with me, Azura… I could not help myself… sorry”

“Don’t worry about it, I don’t mind”

“I am sorry too for what happened, as just said, I already figured it out but… hearing you say it… it broke my heart…”

“It’s okay…”

Evelyn got up off the bed and went out of the room, I saw her going to the kitchen and starting to prepare something, I could feel her sight and wiping some more tears.

“Are you sure that you are okay?”

“Yeah, I am just… Wait!”

I smile at her and she lift me and hug me, spinning me around in complete joy

“You step out!”

“I am really trying so just put me down… I feel like I’m about to throw up”

“Oh, sorry”

Evelyn got his hands together and smile at me

“You are really strong, Azura”

”I am not, it thanks to your help that I’m able to do this, so thank you”

Evelyn negated with her face and continue with doing the food

“I needed to do that at least to make sure you go without worries”

“What do you mean?”

“I found a place that could be the answer to get you back to your world, is a bit far from here, but I’m sure you can manage… I don’t really know that much about streets but-“

Evelyn held me by the arms and saw into my eyes

“You are coming with me”

“Huh?”