The Eleventh Elder

Warning: Shows grief, though it's kept brief to avoid too much sensitivity. Reader caution is advised.

Bard recognized this song. It was the one he heard the most after leaving Father Tree’s wood. Honor. It was his woods that had fostered Bard to seek out ways to help those around him. As he looked around, he didn’t spot any shades. He was both surprised and relieved. Then he was pained. If only the other two had been like this. He wouldn’t have to feel so hurt.

“Hmmm. Guests? What a nice surprise,” a voice hummed. Bard’s eye stung as he wiped away the tears. “You’ve gotten so big. Both of you. And you bring a girl with you? A potential bride, perhaps?” Honor’s voice resounded. “It’s good to see you again, Bard. Kai. Welcome.”

Sen jumped down and ran over to the tree. She touched one of the branches laden with pine-like needles and then pushed to the trunk.

“Greetings Elder. My name is Sen. I pledged myself to Bard, and I’ve heard he has one of your tokens,” Sen said cordially.

“Honor. Elder Honor. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sen. I see you’ve been through a lot. Shades and such. Come and join me at the river. The shallows are warm from the sunlight. Clean yourselves and rest.”

Elder honor guided them to his clearing, laden with needles from previous years. It was a different spot than the last time Bard was here. Kai shook and Bard realized he should get down. He slid off, and Sen quickly returned and began to unload Kai. Bard started to help, noting how worn out she looked. He felt a bit off, but as she walked away with a bundle in hand, he felt a bit better. He shook his head. Why would he want her away from him? He paused, and she noticed and rushed over to grab the things in his hands.

“Let me,” she said, and Bard gritted his teeth but felt the fight leave him. He reached for where Father’s token was and then felt its absence. His eyes flew wide as he began to pad himself down, searching for it.

“Sen! My tokens?” he nearly shouted, and she rushed over to him.

“It’s okay Bard. You were tired, and I used them to drive off the shades. They’re right here,” she said as she reached in her clothes for them. She pulled it out with some hesitation, and he scowled. “I had hoped… never mind.” She said at length before grabbing more items. Bard held the tokens as he watched her leave. His gaze briefly caught hold of the black tokens, and he winced as tears fell again. He wiped them away and put the tokens around his neck. He looked at Sen and mentally kicked himself. Here he was struggling, and she was carrying it all, the momentum, the cooking, the supplies, getting them to the next Elder. He felt a bit useless, like when he woke to the fires.

“Bard, it’s okay,” Sen said, grabbing his hand. He looked at her confused. “You were mumbling. And it’s fine. I’m happy to help. You’ve just lost someone important.” Bard shook his head. “And if you want to feel helpful again, you can help me felt that fur. I sort of forgot some of the steps, so I stopped.” Sen looked away, embarrassed. Bard took her up on the offer as she finished setting up camp, and they headed to the shallows. Sen removed her shoes and jumped into the water. It wasn’t long before she was squawking.

“It’s freezing! Elder Honor, you said it would be warm!”

“It is warm. Compared to the rest that is moving along over there, it’s quite warm. Just look at Kai,” Honor said as he moved closer. Bard and Sen’s eyes moved to Kai, who was whimpering as he moved to the shallows. As soon as he was in the shallows, he sighed and submerged himself into the water as best he could. He looked like he was enjoying it. Sen grumbled and walked further out to where it got deep and jumped in. She screamed, and Bard tried not to laugh as she raced back to the shallows. She then spread out in the water and sighed in delight.

“A change in perspective!” she shouted, fist flying towards the sky, and Bard laughed with Elder Honor.

“That’s one way to do it,” Bard hummed. With the moment over, he sighed and settled back. He shook his head and chided himself. How long was he going to be like this? He moved the fur, trying to keep himself in motion, and brought it to the water’s edge. From there he began to wet it and felt it. Sen came over and helped, asking him questions. Eventually he stopped, unable to muster more energy to help. She kept working at it while he somewhat directed. Sen climbed out of the water and shivered before sitting next to him.

“Brrrr. B Bard? What are y you think ing about?” she shivered. Bard’s brows rose, and he almost chattered with her, a shiver running up his spine. He fetched a blanket, a towel and a change of clothes for her. When he got back, she had him hide under the blanket while she got dressed and dry. Afterwards, she hung her clothes and then accepted the blanket.

“Mmmm. That’s warm,” she hummed, sitting next to him. “So?”

“I’m not thinking about anything,” Bard answered.

She hummed and leaned against him. Bard groaned and shifted away, rising to pull on the felted fabric and bring it away from the water. Sen watched him, and he grunted as he moved away. Her gaze felt frustrating, if not stifling. Why was he this bothered by it? He looked at his tokens and felt some tears fall again as his gaze glanced over the black ones. Feeling angry, he ripped them off and was about to throw it away when he stopped, dropping to his knees. Sen came over and grabbed his hand. He looked at her and then closed his eyes, subconsciously leaning into her as she embraced him.

“I couldn’t save them,” he said, nearly biting his lips and tongue.

“Don’t. You saved my forest, and my family and friends. If we hadn’t gone back, then they would be dead by the time we returned,” she said, and Bard stiffened. He shook his head. How had she figured his thoughts? “Preparation did all he could. He even had some catfolk alerted, but he wasn’t sure if the dryads and trees had made it and if there was any help coming. They chose the route of fire, because they entrusted the dryads with their seeds and other things. What happens, happens, and there wasn’t much warning. We did the best we could. Everyone realized that.”

Bard tried to stop his tears, but her words hit him hard. They stayed there for a while as he recovered. Eventually the tears stopped, and he closed his eyes, wanting to rest.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________

Sen held Bard. This was all she could do as he wrestled with his inner demons. She had seen him about to throw his tokens and rushed over, only to see him unable and breaking down. She stayed with him as he forced himself to sleep. The rumbling sound of Elder Honor as he moved was welcoming. She looked up at him and tried to smile. She shifted, content that Bard was asleep, before speaking.

“He’s so… broken. Elder Honor? What do I do?” she asked, hating seeing him suffer.

“Hmmm.” His branches moved to be closer as he bent over his conical shape. “It depends on what sort of outcome you are seeking,” He mused. Sen looked up and shivered. Kai came out of the shallows and shook, a drop nearly landing on her.

“An outcome? I just want him to back to his old self. The one that I risked my life for. The one who has been there for me,” Sen said.

“Then that honorable figure, the one you call Bard, the person who was "before" is gone—not in a tragic sense, but in the sense that pain reshapes us. Trying to return them to who they were dishonors their struggle and growth. To demand they return to who they were before would be to dishonor what they have endured. Ask instead how you might walk beside them as they become,” he said calmly. Sen’s mouth somewhat dropped. Was she just supposed to wait? How was that going to help?

“I see you don’t understand. Perhaps something else. These woods, are not bright. If not for the song, the shades would overrun it quickly,” Honor said. Sen looked out and saw it was as he said. The branches of the trees, like the elder, made it hard for sunlight to reach the floor. It wasn’t dark, but it wasn’t bright either.

“The light does not always come in bright bursts. Sometimes, it comes as a flicker or a thin beam through the trees. Even in shadows, we find our way toward the suns, knowing it cannot wait for perfect conditions. You, and Bard, must move even when the light is dim. Honor the journey, even in its obscurity.”

“I… I sort of understand,” Sen stammered. She could grasp the idea of moving even when things weren't ideal, but how did one honor the journey and obscurity?

“Make him comfortable and come with me. I have something to show you,” Honor said softly. Sen looked to Kai, who brought over some things, and she reached around to make a pillow for Bard and wrapped him in a blanket.

“Stay with him, Kai,” She said. She took one sunstone and one lightstick with her, aware of how few they had.