The Weight of Silence

Tsubasa showed up at Shinya’s apartment without warning, as he always did. He didn’t walk there. He simply appeared, materializing in front of the door, and rang the doorbell. Almost as soon as he pressed the button, Shinya opened the door. He was still finishing putting on his sneakers.

“Going somewhere?“ Tsubasa asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Just a walk,“ Shinya replied, adjusting his shoelaces with the same calmness as if he were commenting on the weather.

A brief, almost ironic chuckle escaped Tsubasa.

“You're a god. What are you going to do walking around?“

Shinya shrugged and stepped outside, closing the door behind him.

“To observe. Feel the wind. Sometimes you notice things from a different perspective,“ he said. “Wanna join me? You might even like it.“

Tsubasa sighed, but curiosity seemed to outweigh his disagreement with his brother’s behavior. It baffled him that Shinya would choose not to use his divine powers to do something humans only did out of necessity. It was, at the very least, odd. Still, he decided to go along, figuring it would also be a good chance to observe his brother and see how he was adjusting to human life.

The streets were calm that afternoon. A light breeze rustled the trees, and the sounds of the city mingled with distant conversations and the clinking of cups from nearby cafés. Shinya walked naturally, greeting passersby with a light smile, while Tsubasa walked beside him, still not fully grasping his brother’s intentions. Silence lingered between them for a while, until Tsubasa couldn’t take it anymore.

“You... seem different. I can feel something's changed, even if just a little.“

“Maybe I’m adapting.“ Shinya gave a faint smile.

Tsubasa paused for a moment.

“You really do want to stay here, don’t you?“

“Maybe it’s not as bad as you think.“

“And you haven’t thought about how this could affect you?“

Shinya stopped too, but didn’t turn to look at Tsubasa. Instead, he gazed upward, as if the answer his brother was so desperate to hear might be hidden in the clouds.

“Honestly, it might already be affecting me,“ he said. “And not in a bad way.“

Tsubasa stepped closer, placing a hand on Shinya’s shoulder. His voice was gentle.

“I worry about you. About how your choices might affect the balance of things, even if you don’t mean them to.“

Shinya locked eyes with him, his expression steady.

“Don’t worry. I’ve already found what I needed.“

“So… it was Hana?“

Shinya simply nodded.

The other god studied him in silence for a few seconds. There was no judgment in his gaze, only a cold calculation, as if trying to assess the consequences. But before he could say anything, something across the street made him frown. Mayu was laughing, chatting cheerfully with a guy.

Her smile was soft and genuine. A different sparkle in her eyes. She clung lightly to the man’s arm, and every time he said something, she laughed even harder. Tsubasa placed a hand on his chest, feeling a strange discomfort, something he’d never felt before.

“That’s... Mayu, isn’t it?“ he asked, trying to sound casual.

“Yeah,“ Shinya answered, watching the scene with the same focus. “Wanna go say hi?“

“Wait.“ Tsubasa grabbed his arm, almost without thinking. “Let’s just... watch.“

Shinya looked at him, curious.

“What’s up?“

“Nothing,“ he said quickly. “Just thought it was interesting.“

While the two remained watching, the guy with Mayu entered a nearby store, and she stayed on the sidewalk, checking her phone like she was waiting for him. When she looked up, she noticed their stares and quickly crossed the street. Her smile faded into a more neutral expression, though it couldn’t hide her flushed cheeks. She adjusted her purse and stopped in front of them.

“Hi, Shinya! Oh, Tsubasa...“ she said, her voice a bit higher than usual. “Didn’t expect to run into you two... I was waiting for my brother. He just got back from a trip.“

Tsubasa blinked in surprise, and Shinya noticed the visible easing of his shoulders the moment the word ‘brother’ was said.

“We were just walking around,“ Shinya said, smiling. “You seemed pretty excited.“

“Oh, I just hadn’t seen him in a long time...“ Mayu replied, laughing awkwardly. “He lives in another country.“

“You seemed... different,“ Tsubasa said, trying to sound casual, but failing.

Mayu quickly looked away.

“I’m always like this.“ She clutched the strap of her bag, eyes on the ground for a second. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.“

“I don’t know... it just looked like you were... glowing.“ The words slipped out before he could stop them.

The silence that followed was thick. Tsubasa didn’t seem to grasp the weight of what he’d said, he just spoke what he felt, unaware of how much it might mean.

Shinya observed them closely. There was something in Mayu’s eyes—a quick glance away, a stubborn blush, a restrained smile—and something in the way Tsubasa, usually composed and rational, now didn’t seem to know what to do with his hands.

Shinya knew she liked him. And his brother... maybe he was starting to feel something too, even if he wouldn’t admit it.

“You know...“ Shinya said, breaking the silence in a casual tone. “We could plan something one of these days. Like that night with the takoyaki.“

Mayu looked up, surprised.

“I think that’s a great idea.“

Shinya gave a subtle glance at his brother.

“You’ll come too, right?“

Tsubasa looked like he’d just walked into a situation he couldn’t back out of.

“I...“ He cleared his throat, eyes darting anywhere but toward Mayu. “Maybe.“

Mayu smiled. A shy, genuine smile, like she’d just received an unexpected gift.

“Alright then. One of these days.“ She adjusted her purse again and looked toward the store, where her brother was coming out, distracted by his phone.

“Well, I’ll finish showing him around. See you two later.“

She waved goodbye, her soft perfume lingering in the air. Silence returned as Shinya and Tsubasa resumed their walk.

“Mayu’s nice, right?“ Shinya asked, as if he expected the answer to reveal more than just an opinion.

“Yeah, she’s... kind,“ Tsubasa replied.

“Seeing her with another guy bothered you, didn’t it? But you felt relieved when you found out it was her brother. You got flustered because of how cute she was. It usually means you care more than you think.“

Tsubasa looked at Shinya, his expression shifting, now more serious, more firm.

“And that’s the problem, Shinya. It’s exactly what we’re supposed to avoid,“ he said. “It’s what I keep warning you about.“

Shinya stopped. His eyes were fixed on the horizon.

“So what do you plan to do, then? Stay alone for all eternity?“

“I’m a god, Shinya. That’s what we are... These kinds of thoughts are dangerous. We weren’t meant to live this way. Or to cling to this world.“

The silence stretched. They walked a few more steps until Tsubasa, still not looking at his brother, asked:

“What about the day Hana dies? Have you thought about what you’ll do when that happens?“

The wind blew strong at that moment. The question hung in the air, heavy with its own weight.

Shinya didn’t answer. He didn’t even have an answer. No matter how much he tried to avoid the thought, it had become inescapable.

And that’s what truly bothered him. Not knowing what he would do, or worse, fearing he might do exactly what his brother was most afraid of.

He couldn’t trust himself not to act on it. Not when the only thing he wanted was to stay by her side… and when he knew he might do anything to keep it that way.