There's a Snake on my Pants!

I normally didn’t like visiting our local pet shops because all of them had tons of poor little animals that were locked behind glass and cages. Like, I knew they were feeding them and cleaning them, because I worked here one summer, but I still hated the thought that they were all looking for a nice home and couldn’t find one.

Today, my spirits were a little lifted, because there was a huge line out the door. People were leaving with all sorts of little animals and all kinds of care products to handle them.

“What the heck is going on?” I asked June.

“There must be a sale…” she guessed.

We had to wait in line for a while, but once we got inside we noticed that all the displays and cages were completely empty. There was definitely a sale based on all the signs around the store, but it was actually more than that.

“Excuse me…” I poked the shoulder of one of the employees.

“Oh, hey Auri,” said a girl with red hair and freckles, who I couldn’t remember the name of… Her name tag was covered up by a blue budgie's tail too, and he wasn’t moving. “Are you here for national Pet Awareness month?”

“What?”

Apparently, national pet awareness month was an entire 31 days dedicated to people taking care of pets from shelters and pet shops across the country. Now that I was getting a good look at the clientele shopping today, it was mostly hippies and farmers who looked like they were taking this serious.

“Well, how about that…” I cooed in satisfaction. “So, anyways, we’re looking for a UV lamp. Do you have any that are splash proof?”

“Auri…” the red haired girl said “Gunther is a land tortoise. You’ll want to keep his enclosure dry for the most part.”

“No, it’s not for Gunther.” I shook my head. “We have a guy in the bath who…”

June raised her hand and pushed me behind her. “I actually just got a nondescript semi-aquatic pet who needs a UV lamp.”

“Calling Octo semi-aquatic is humorous indeed,” Cal commented, which caused me to shush him quiet.

The red haired girl took us to the back of the store where they kept that sort of equipment. She showed off a few UV lamps, but all of them were too small and probably wouldn’t help Octo-bar much.

Instead, she ran to the back and pulled out the industrial light. It was the perfect size, but expensive as heck. Luckily, June had a bunch of gift cards my mom kept sending her every year for her birthday and Christmas, so it only came out to a fraction of the price.

There was a sudden weird sensation around my leg, like something just slithered up it.

*ZAP!*

I kicked my foot forward as I felt something sting me and knocked the empty box the huge UV lamp came out of over. When I looked down, I swear I saw a snake just dive behind a display!

“Rikes!” I cried out as I jumped into Cal’s arms. “Rars and Rake in Rear, Ral!”

“W-what did you just say?” Cal looked at me, utterly stupefied.

“Yeah, Auri…” June looked just as dumbstruck. “What the heck just happened?”

“Oh… Uh…” I guess all those years of a certain dog detective and his hippy friend triggered a strange response when I jumped onto Cal. “I think a snake just bit me.”

The red haired employee looked really puzzled, but checked out my leg for any bite marks. “We don’t sell snakes here. Not since the Bite of 87…”

I swore I just saw a snake, and I don’t usually swear at all. That thing was long, slippery and had other details a snake would normally have that I’m too frightened to remember.

“Cal, I can’t touch the floor anymore.” I snuggled close to his beefy chest. “You’ll have to protect me.”

“Oh no…” June rolled her eyes. “This definitely isn’t an excuse to grapple onto Cal like a mountain climber in public, I’m sure.”

“Woman! There is a snake around these parts!” I yelled in fear. “I am ‘not’ touching that floor!”

Luckily, the employee couldn’t find any teeth marks on me… But that snake sure did something shocking!

“You sure it wasn’t an electric eel?” June asked me jokingly.

“Oh, we do sell those!” The employee said. “There right over there!”

She was right. The display was next to the glow in the dark fish. I was suspicious that maybe one of those bit me. The electric eels, not the fish. But the lady ‘claimed’ they needed water to get around.

“Likely story…” I seethed. “You guys don’t think that snake bite is going to turn me into a naga, do you?”

June looked a little more concerned now, but waved it off without taking me serious. “Don’t be dramatic. But Cal, just keep an eye out for her, would you?”

“Of course, Friend June.” Cal nodded, watching the floors very closely.

(>.>)

The whole store was cleared out of its stock of pets and items before we even got to the register. We were lucky we got here when we did, because a kid was looking for an industrial UV lamp too, but we got the last one by about five minutes.

Now all we had to do was wait in line for the cashier to ring us up, and then we were safe to head back and give Octo some much needed Vit D!

“Bark!” A call came from the back of the store.

“Hmm?” Cal turned toward his right to see empty lanes of shelves.

“Bark Bark!”

“Did you hear that?” Cal asked me.

“Uh, yeah?” That barking was so loud and echoing through the entire store. “Cal, people in Australia can probably hear that barking.”

“Bark Bark! Woof!”

“No, it sounds like a cry for help!”

Cal left the line with me in his arms. Then he kicked down store shelves and whatever else happened to be in his way until he got all the way to the back of the store where the bathrooms were.

Without thinking, he ran right into the men's room, still holding me!

“Cal!” I covered my eyes. “I can’t be in here!”

“Bark Bark!”

The barking was definitely coming from this bathroom, so I curiously peeked through my fingers to see a pale furred dog was barking at the floor.

Cal jumped in and stomped his feet down several times across the ground, causing huge quakes that shook everything violently.

“Princess Aurilia…” he placed me on top of the faucets and picked up something flattened and wiggly. “I think I’ve found those snakes you were referring to…”

That wiggly thing looked like a cross between an eel and some strange sort of thin machine. It was crackling with sparks now that Cal seemed to have destroyed it.

“I guess I wasn’t crazy after all.” I wanted to say that was a good thing, but in this case, I think it was one of those rare times that it would have been nice to be wrong.