Mei and Emilia

I made it through elementary, middle, high, and College. After all that time and effort, where did it get me?

An office job that pays well, but at the cost of the employee's sanity and well-being. Contrary to my tone, I actually didn’t quite mind the work itself. I disliked the thoughts that occupied my mind while I was working. The thoughts that remind me that I could’ve done something more with my life. Something more engaging, passion-driven.

I was yet another victim of societal expectations. Deep down, I felt it was that way for most of us.

Only a select few people got the chance to pursue what they wanted. And those people, chances are, already had what they wanted to begin with. That was nothing new for them. It was those types of people that I hated the most.

Deprecating thoughts like these filled my mind. This became the norm for me while working. If I didn’t have distractions like this, I’d go insane. I’d be the same as everyone else who worked in this company. Before I could plunge farther into the depths of my mind, I was brought back to reality by the sound of heavy footsteps, followed by yelling. Then, the person next to my cubicle, Emilia, I believe her name was, became the target of that rage. Jarring, I know, but this was the norm at this company.

Emilia, often referred to as Emi, had a lot of issues within this company. By no means was she stupid or anything like that. It was just noticeable that her mind was always elsewhere. I could tell, without even talking to her, that she had just followed what everyone told her to do.

Finish school, get a job, all the like.

In that regard, she and I were similar.

Unlike me, Emi hadn’t managed to get used to this deprecating cycle.

“EMILIA! Everyone has finished except you! EVEN MISATO, WHO’S PREGNANT!”

“...S-sorry, boss. I’ll work faster.”

“Work… FASTER? Emi. You don’t seem to understand. The deadline passed… AN HOUR AGO.”

His rage momentarily paused, giving room for Emi–and all of us overlookers to breathe.

I understood him being upset, but even still, putting Emilia on the spot like that, in front of everyone. I felt that was harsh. The boss screamed at the weak Emilia for another 3 or so minutes, then wrapped up by telling her to go home.

In the middle of Emilia’s lecture, I noticed a head peek around my cubicle, noticeably jarred. It was the aforementioned Misato.

“...It’s rough, isn’t it?”

“Hm?”

“Emilia’s treatment, I mean.”

“Oh, yeah. That’s just the boss, though, I guess.”

“Don’t you feel sorry for her?”

Of course, I felt sorry for her, but at the same time, the blame fell on her. We did still work in a company, after all. Work needed to be done. It was hard to solely pick her side when everything was all said and done. Misato likely wouldn’t accept that response, though. I was sure that she wanted me to just pick Emilia’s side, regardless.

“I suppose”. A wry response that I left her to chew on.

Contrary to how it may seem, Emilia was actually quite liked in the workforce. Sure, she was absent-minded, yet somehow, she always had enough energy to help everyone out.

Hm? That’s probably why she didn’t finish her workload, huh? She’d been too busy helping out everyone else. I did notice her occasionally going to help Misato, Ari, and Takura. … Wait?

Why didn’t anyone come forward and explain that to the boss? They could’ve saved Emilia the embarrassment. Or her hours that she’d just lost.

Then it hit me.

That’s just the type of environment that the workforce is.

Everyone turned a blind eye when they saw no benefit in helping.

Once the sun began to set, I exited the tallish building then began making my way home. I looked up at the moon, closed my eyes, and left my body on autopilot. By the time I reopened them, it was already the next day, and I was 5 pages deep into my work. Today felt the same as the last. The only difference was that Misato hadn’t started bugging me this time.

Despite now being “Conscious,” I was still quite zoned out. But what snapped me back to reality was the hellish scream that echoed throughout the office.

“YOU. ARE. FIRED! This company doesn’t need someone like you. If you can’t even work, then what are you even good for, huh? HUH? ANSWER ME, YOU DAMN–”

He paused, trying to conjure up the most hurtful words that he could find. Then once he was satisfied, he picked up where he left off.

“All you ever do is just sit there, looking pretty. I bet you grew up thinking that’s all you ever needed to do, huh? Well, WRONG! One pretty girl like you isn’t enough to leave an impact on this company. I want you out in the next hour. MEI! Get your ass up and help Emilia unload her stuff, and NOW! WE DON’T GOT ALL DAY!”

“Okay…”

Fuck. I got wrapped up in this mess. I felt the sigh physically escape my lips. “Nothin’ I could do about any of this, though”, I thought. Emilia remained on the floor, sitting with her legs bent–butt resting on her heels, with her head pointed down.

I thought she was crying. All of us did. But instead, she lifted her head fast enough to make everyone watching feel dizzy, and laughed. She laughed so hard that tears streamed down her cheeks. Truly a sight for sore eyes.

Then, in a sporadic burst of emotion–

“HAHAHAHAHA!”

A brief pause to wipe her teary eyes.

“Fuck this job! I don’t need this shit!”

We were all starstruck. Not only was this girl simultaneously crying while laughing, but she was also cursing her former place of work. “That’s one hell of a way to never get hired again”, the inner me jeered.

However, she wasn’t done.

“Maybe next I’ll do something I want to do. Follow my dreams, find the beauty in the most pointless of things–ANYTHING THAT YOU FUCKERS COULD NEVER DREAM OF!”

“I swear… It’s not a sin to follow your dreams…” She added as her fumes burned out.

Oh, man. She’s going all the way… Everyone snickered at her. I didn’t blame them. At the end of the day, we all work in some stupid black company. This wasn’t anyone's dream, and I was sure of that.

This world didn’t leave much room for following your ambitions, and I… no, all of us, knew that far too well. Yet Emilia, who was in the same boat as all of us, chose to continue fighting in vain. Something that nobody in this room thought to do.

I watched Emilia as she walked out of the building, leaving all her belongings behind, and it hit me that this would very well be the last time I saw her. Was I okay with that? Okay with letting her leave, to venture to the ends of the horizon, while I rot in this company for the next 10, no, 20, 30, maybe even 40 years? The realist side of me screamed, “Yes. You can deal with that”, but the side of me that still wanted to dream counterargued.

It felt like an opportunity that I passed up all those years ago reopened to me. No way in hell was I going to let it slip past me again. Without as much as saying a final goodbye to my coworkers, I grabbed my coat, put my laptop in my bag, and then ran out of the building at full speed. I caught stares from Misato, and even Takura–Everyone. So, as a farewell, I made sure to hold out my middle finger for just a moment. Hopefully, through me, they saw Emilia.

I once again exited the tallish building, then ran.

As I ran, with 8 hours remaining until it was time to clock out, I couldn’t help but fawn over how beautiful the world looked.

The sun slowly peeked over the horizon, illuminating the sky in a beautiful orange tint that spread as far as the eye could see. It felt like I was a child again, and I had just rebelled against my parents.

I ripped off my work uniform and tossed it, revealing my plain white, oversized blazer underneath. All my senses felt heightened. I never knew that the world could also feel this powerful. “This is how it feels, huh?”

By the time I reached Emilia, she was already halfway to the train station, and I was dead out of breath.

“E…Emilia…”

“M-MEI? What are you doing here?”

I limped over and put both hands on my knees while I regained my breath. After a momentary pause, I resumed.

“I want to… Come with…you.”

“Huh? Mei. Do you even know what you’re sayi–”

Her words blurred. I was well aware of the fact that it most likely was due to my fatigue building up, but I already knew she was most likely warning me about what I’d done. I knew what I did, and even now, I still don’t regret it. Nothing could make me regret this feeling.

I had to tell her what was on my mind–what I was feeling, and quickly, before I lost sight of this sensation.

“...I’ll…abandon it all.”

I paused to catch my breath.

“Every day I sat in that office, waiting, praying that I’d get another chance. Another chance to change my life…”

I hesitated. I wondered if I was truly making the right decision. But I’d come this far. If I turned back now, I would never be able to forgive myself.

So in one fell swoop, I confessed.

“That chance is right in front of me. You told everyone that following your dreams isn’t a sin, so SHOW ME, DAMMIT!”

I briefly paused, catching my breath once more, then faced her. The edges of her eyes had still been red from the tears, and her makeup was everywhere but where it should have been.

I gazed at her. I made sure to keep my eyes locked onto hers. Then, when her defenses were down, I asked her once more.

“Just take me with you…”

“Let me dream your dream,” I added, while in the middle of a deep bow.

She looked at me with eyes of confusion, except this time, her pupils began widening, as did her mouth. In her eyes, I saw the Earth, Pluto, Jupiter, and Mars.

But above all, I saw possibilities.

Emi wanted to change her life. I wanted to follow her in suit. It didn’t matter how little we knew each other; none of those trivial things affected me. I just wanted to dream again.

Emilia would open that path for me.

The constellations and planets contained in her eyes told me she would.