The Answer I Couldn't Say

"…" The wind swept past them, tousling hair as their eyes met.

Heat. Fear. Anticipation. A thousand emotions swirled in their gazes as the confession lingered in the air.

Hinoka's eyes were wider than the sun, and her face burned with a fierce blush. Hands shook, and lips quavered as she slowly opened and closed her mouth several times, trying to find the words.

"…" She then looked away, her head swishing to the side in a flurry of brown hair.

Miyami's nerves rose. Something wasn't right. Why wasn't Hinoka saying anything? Had she misread the situation? Maybe she had somehow mistaken—

She was interrupted by the sound of Hinoka's voice, for once, even shakier than her own.

"I-I um…" An awkward laugh. "…So this is how it feels to be on the receiving end…"

Hinoka's cheeks scrunched up before turning back to meet her gaze, and a smile broke out from beneath uncertainty.

"Of course I'd be your—"

*bzzt!* *bzzt!* *bzzt!*

Both of their heads whipped to the source of the interruption. Hinoka's phone was vibrating wildly, and the caller ID said it was from the PI.

They shared a glance, and she answered it.

"H-hey, what's up?" An edge of concern in her voice.

"…" Miyami scooched closer to better hear, and Hinoka let her.

The tone from the other end was urgent.

"…The stalker just left his house, and he's starting to walk in the direction of the park." A cough. "I don't think he knows anything is up, but it might not be safe to stay where you are. Can you two head back to the apartment?"

"Shit." Hinoka's expression soured. "Yeah, of course. We'll head back there now."

The shuffle of paper. "Thanks. Sorry to disrupt things. I'll keep in contact if anything else changes."

The call ended.

Hinoka's jaw clenched, and a flash of anger flitted across her features. But shortly after, she turned to look at Miyami with a reassuring smile.

"Figures that something would happen now," the shorter girl sighed. "But uh, where were we? Ah, right, you asked me to be your girlfriend—"

Miyami wanted to listen, but her body had already kicked into autonomous gear. It was as if she were a computer, and safety mode had booted. She swiftly closed the lid to the bento, shoved it back into the cooler bag, then folded away everything else into the confines of it.

"Um…" Hinoka began, watching the process with awe.

The dark-ponytailed girl ignored her and stood up, slinging the bag over her shoulder before extending a helping hand to her friend—hopefully soon to be girlfriend.

Her heart felt like it would burst with anxiousness, but she refused to let herself falter here.

"…" Her hand remained stretched out.

"…Miyami?" Hinoka questioned, hesitantly taking hold of the hand. "Can I at least answer before—"

A free finger pressed against her lips—only for a moment though, Miyami had learned her lesson from previously—before the girl shook her head.

She couldn't bear to hear a reply now, not when her thoughts were so frazzled by the prospect of danger. Not when she couldn't focus or appreciate what would be said.

Instead, she tugged her twintailed coworker to her feet and initiated the trek back toward safety. Hinoka followed without protest, their pace much quicker and more urgent than before.

***

They made their way through the park. Tension lingered in the cooling atmosphere like a fog, even as other park goers merrily continued about their business. This would've been the perfect setting for a dramatic reveal and romantic moment, Hinoka lamented.

But nope. In place of that, they were stuck in some kind of cheaply made thriller because of some delusional man.

It was ridiculous.

The usually fiery woman clenched her free hand into a fist, her knuckles white as her eyes took in the fleeting greenery. If she found that bastard, she'd make sure he'd regret ever looking at her. She'd beat his face into a pulp, tear off his balls, and make him—

Hinoka bit her inner cheek, taking a deep, calming breath. She was getting too caught up in the anger again, letting her emotions get the better of her. It was best if she just savored the nice weather and Miyami's company instead while she could. Especially given how the now ponytailed girl's fingers were tightly interlaced with hers as they made their way along the path, her slender hand trembling ever so slightly.

She looked up at the typically timid woman. There was a stoic determination in her expression, her eyes set forward and her chin held high despite the fear in them. It was almost like she was a different person, and that only added to her allure in the afternoon sun's glow.

"…You know, you're really cute in this hairstyle. It's kinda badass," Hinoka slipped softly, trying to lighten the mood.

A flash of pink bloomed on Miyami's cheeks at the compliment, and the grip on Hinoka's hand tightened.

*ba-dump!*

Oh God, that was adorable. It made her stomach do more flips than her indoor-bound self had back in the apartment. Despite the tension, she felt more connected to Miyami now than ever.

Her eyes traced the delicate curve of the other woman's face, the way her bangs still covered half of it, and the gentle rise and fall of her chest as they finally emerged from the park's edge. To think that this endearing shut-in would venture this far out of her element just for her…

She really didn't deserve this penguin princess.

It wasn't too long until they were back at the apartment. Miyami keyed in the entry to the building, then guided her to the stairs and up to the third floor in silence. Only the sound of their footsteps and heavy breathing accompanied them.

They stopped in front of the door, and Miyami fished out her keys with a trembling hand before unlocking it and letting them both in.

The darkness of the apartment flickered back to life as Miyami secured the door, and Hinoka centered herself. Unlike outside, the air was still and cool here. The only noises came from the gentle hum of the refrigerator and the occasional squeak of the floor as they shed their shoes.

Safety.

"…" Hinoka looked up, expecting to see Miyami's relieved expression or at least a sign that things were better.

But all she saw were fresh tears. Fat droplets of water trailed down her friend's previously stoic face, and her shoulders were almost vibrating with emotion.

"Miyami…?" Hinoka stepped closer. "Are you okay?"

The taller woman nodded, wiping away wetness with a smile that said 'Yeah, totally!' but without the heart to actually back it up.

"…" She was not fine, not at all.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm okay, we're safe now." Hinoka closed the distance between them and hugged the girl, wrapping her arms around her.

Miyami's sobs filled the room. Her body trembled and her breaths became ragged. She clung to Hinoka, her hands balling the fabric of her tank top, and her face buried in the dip of her neck.

They migrated over to the couch. Miyami sat beside her, still clinging to the smaller girl, her body shaking with quiet cries and sniffles.

Hinoka stroked the taller woman's hair and back, trying to soothe the brave soul in the only way she knew how. Her fingers traced circles on her shirt, and her thumb rubbed the back of Miyami's hand.

"Shh, it's okay." She murmured, calming the atmosphere. "We're good now. Thanks for getting us back here safely."

"…"

Miyami's grip loosened slightly, and Hinoka pulled back, her chest clenching as the taller girl's tear-stained face came into view.

She looked like she wanted to say something. But after her throat bobbed in a failed attempt, the smartphone came out.

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

 >> I am so sorry! This was not how today was supposed to go…

 >> I wish I was braver. That I could find some way to help stop this awfulness!

 >> I hate that I cannot do more. (╯︵╰,) I really, REALLY do!

 >> …I just wanted you to be able to enjoy the outdoors again.

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

"Oof…" Hinoka winced, guilt twisting in her gut like a knife as she read.

This was what her dumbass self had dragged Miyami into, and the poor thing was blaming herself for it. It made no sense at all.

Her own darkness began bubbling up again in response. How the hell was she going to fix this?

"…" She gazed at her friend's damp face and felt her resolve harden. A thousand different unhelpful urges and desires were rampaging through her mind, but none of those mattered. All that did was that she make Miyami feel better.

Hinoka gently cupped her coworker's cheeks, her hands warm against the chilled skin, and Miyami's watery eyes met hers with apprehensive curiosity.

*smooch*

A peck on the cheek, nothing more. But it seemed to work.

"…!" The taller woman's breath hitched as she processed what had just happened.

"Hey," Hinoka whispered, looking at her. "It's not your fault, alright? Why don't we just focus back on the fact that you're the cutest, bravest penguin I've ever seen?"

Steam rose from the taller woman's ears, and a fierce blush blossomed in her cheeks. Her mouth opened and closed several times in flustered protest, but no sound came out. Eventually, the girl's gaze averted to the ground and her lips formed into a cute pout—

*grumble*

The abrupt noise startled both of them. And their heads tilted in confusion before realization hit.

Oh. They'd never eaten yet.

Hinoka couldn't resist her urge to laugh, and the tension in the air dissolved like sugar in water.

"Come on, let's heat up that bento box." She encouraged the still flustered Miyami, who shyly nodded before retrieving the food from the cooler.

After a quick microwave session, they were sitting side by side at the table, getting ready to munch on the adorable onigiri and karaage with the lone chopsticks.

"Here." She offered the utensils to Miyami.

"…?" A confused blink.

Hinoka smirked. "What? You were trying to feed us with one set earlier, weren't you? Why would I begrudge you that?"

*fwump!*

The ponytailed girl deflated onto the table like a balloon. The pout she still had almost made it seem like she was kissing the wood.

Hinoka snickered before taking one of the cat onigiri. She held it up to her, giving a teasing 'hurt' look.

"Aww, is my girlfriend already cheating on me with a table? And here I thought you loved me too!"

"!"

The penguin princess bolted upright in an instant, and a wave of new emotions flickered across her face: surprise, elation, embarrassment, and something else that Hinoka couldn't quite place.

Miyami's fingers fidgeted with the hem of her shirt as her mouth quivered, and for a second, Hinoka was afraid she'd start tearing up again. But then she nodded with a firmness that could rival a samurai lord and opened wide, allowing her to feed the rice ball.

Goodness. She really did look like a penguin with that expression.

Cute.

"In all seriousness though, I intended to say yes back there." Hinoka explained once the other woman was done chewing, her heart beating faster as she leaned in closer. "I know things are confusing and messy, and there's a lot of shit going on right now, but I'd be more than happy to accept… If you're fine with a disaster like me, that is."

Various things whirled around in Miyami's eyes, but toward the end, she squinted and quickly tapped some words Hinoka's way.

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

 >> Disaster? Don't ever call yourself that, okay? ( ; ω ; )

 >> Have you seen me? I'm a nervous wreck that has to use messages to speak most of the time!

 >> My body probably spends more time on the ground than it does upright. _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):_

 >> And I have a super weird, unfeminine, scraggily penguin voice, to boot. (*μ_μ)

 >> (Still trying to come to terms that you might somehow like it by the way)

 >> But yeah. I would be super happy if you were my girlfriend! (´• ω •`) ♡

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

"…" Hesitation lingered in Hinoka's expression before she chuckled. "You really are too nice, Miyami."

The other girl shook her head in denial, and Hinoka's smile widened. She felt an overwhelming, nearly unstoppable urge to reach out and embrace her again. To kiss her and show her all the emotions that were swelling within.

But no. She wouldn't do that, not yet at least.

"So it's settled then?" Eyes burned as she confirmed. "You're okay being my girlfriend?"

*cute nodding*

Hinoka grinned and leaned forward, bringing their lips close enough that they were almost touching. Her voice was low, inviting.

"In that case, is it okay if we seal the deal? I promise I won't go further than that."

A delightful shiver ran through her friend—no, her girlfriend—at the proposal. Miyami's eyes were wide, and her cheeks brightened like the setting sun outside.

She nodded again, this time slower and more deliberately, and Hinoka could see the desire in her gaze.

She closed the gap, and their lips met.

It wasn't like the movies or the dramatic scenes from shows. It was simple and chaste, just a brushing of their mouths, but it sent electricity coursing through them regardless.

Then it was over. Hinoka pulled herself back with all the self-control in her being, and Miyami's eyes fluttered, a dreamlike expression in them. Her chest was moving up and down rapidly with short, willowy gasps.

"…Wow," was all the brown-haired woman could say as she attempted to still her racing heart.

Another silent nod.

The two of them sat together in the quiet of the apartment, their thoughts and feelings still tangled up in that single moment.

After a minute or so passed, Miyami fumbled with her phone.

*ping!*

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

 >> So uh, can I try to feed you the rest of the bento now? (´ᵔ⤙ᵔ`)

 >> Then we could… maybe clean up? I'm starting to feel a bit gross honestly from the sweat (>_<)

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

Hinoka raised an eyebrow and snickered as her new partner began reaching for the chopsticks.

"Of course."

***

Miyami and Hinoka sat on the couch, savoring each other's presence. The apartment was the tiniest bit humid from their recent showers, and the moonlight filtered through the window blinds, casting a dim blueish glow in the room.

Miyami sighed contently, her body leaning against the shorter woman, who was gently holding her in return. It was more than she ever thought possible considering her situation and past.

Yet, there she was, her chest rising and falling in rhythm with Hinoka's breaths, and the sound of her girlfriend's heartbeat echoing in her ear.

There were still so many doubts lingering in her soul and mind—about herself, Hinoka, the stalker, the future—but for now, she wanted nothing more than to just savor the feeling of Hinoka's embrace.

And of course, Hinoka seemed to be more than happy to indulge her. Her partner's arms tightened, pulling Miyami even closer until their bodies were pressed together, dark and brown hair intermingling. Warmth was all she could feel and all she could see.

It was bliss. A moment of tranquility amidst all the chaos that had surrounded them.

Chibi Hinoka made a fleeting appearance in her mind, holding up a lovingly decorated sign.

'♡ Congrats, Penguin Princess! ♡'