Boy Band Dreams And Magical Schemes

“Ah! The light is…So warm.”

Ayumi Sasaki was pretty sure there was something someone said at some point about staying away from bright lights. Something something very dangerous, something something mortal soul.

Then again, that person hadn’t just been in a three hour make out session with chart topping hot boy super group FCK. Why isn’t that still going on, by the way?

…Superstar

“Yes, I am a superstar thank you. That doesn’t really explain the reason my tongue isn’t jammed down Takumi’s throat, though.”

…Magical Superstar.

“Praising me won’t stop me being angry about the interruption! Or going towards this light! Ah, so warm, so soft!”

…You’re a Magical Superstar.

“Yes, again, thank you. Now, if the guys at work could realise that instead of grabbing my ass every five minutes, that would be fantastic. Anyway, for the last time, constantly singing my praises isn't going to make up for me not having Takumi’s hot, supple-”

…SHINE SHINE! MAGICAL SUPERSTAR!

“Hey! What the hell?” Ayumi’s eye’s finally snapped open, and she launched the first object she could find across the room. That object just happened to be creating the bright warm light and the God awful racket she heard in her dream.

Her eyes blinked as she adjusted. Naturally, the first thing her eyes focused on was the big glowing brick on her floor.

“A phone?” She knew she didn't have one like that. The pinkish golden ornament looked like something from the nineteen nineties. To double check she wasn't going completely mad, she looked down at her dress side table. Her sleek, black and silver company smart phone rested upon it.

She checked the time. Five AM exactly. An hour before she was due in for work. She checked her schedule. She had far too much to do before going in, but that song was still going. She couldn't work like this. Technically, she couldn't work like this at her job anyway, being the only female employee of an auto parts sales company, but that was beside the point.

She cursed the start to her day and resolved to pick up the phone. The quicker it got put in the bin the quicker she could just get a cup of coffee and get the day over with. As she approached the phone, however, she found the glow to be too bright. Blinding her as she got halfway, and giving her a headache at the point of contact, she went to pick it up.

The phone's torch wasn't producing the light. She had checked it over.

The phone itself was.

It was warm and pleasant to the touch, but Ayumi was freaked out. She could make out pretty pink tassels and penguin charms beneath the glow. A high schooler’s phone? She knew she'd got pretty hammered at the office party last night, but if she had committed theft…Oh God! She needed to apologise!

“Hello!? I’m so sorry. I didn't mean to steal your phone. Especially one as high-tech as this. Who is the manufacturer? SunSun? MyPhone? No, wait, that's a stupid question. This isn't a business call. If you could just give me your name and address, I will return your belongings to you as quickly as poss-”

“Um! Do you want to be a magical girl?” The voice on the other side was clearly an adult and clearly nervous. An advertising trainee? She had to deal with enough of those in her daily life.

“No. No, I do not.”

Oh! Well, then, can I tell you about how Jesus is your Lord and saviour?”

“My parents were Catholic, and they're both dead.”

“Oh my! I'm very sorry to hear that! Um…Um!”

Ayumi could hear what sounded like pages turning, except each page turn was accompanied by the sound of loud twinkling and the feeling of warmth in her ear. She remembered baking with her mother and motorcycle riding with her father. The thoughts were so vivid that she nearly threw the phone again.

“…Hot singles in your area?”

The call was ended.

As she began the business of her day, Ayumi couldn't get over the conversation. It was boring and pointless, but those memories…

It didn't just look like her parents were there, she could feel them. The smell of the motorbike oil in her nose, her mother's shrill, high-pitched voice as she panicked that Ayumi was going to fall off.

The more she thought about it, the hotter her ear became.

And hotter…

And hotter…

“I’m so sorry about this Sasaki-san! You probably don't remember because you were drunk. I helped you, but you said you wouldn't tell anyone. Are you still not going to tell anyone? Please don't, I've only just finished my time at the Arcanum.”

“You’re in my head now!? The fuck? Work is killing me. Mother said it was too early for me to go into the workforce and I didn’t listen and now I'm going insane in my own kitchen… Lord have mercy.”

“You’re not going mad, Sasaki-san! As I was trying to say, I helped you out when you were drunk. You got really drunk because the men were harassing you, Um… You told me that you love me and you wanted to keep something of mine. I tried to stop you, but you were very forceful.”

“I forced myself on you!?”

“Not really. I could've stopped you if I wanted to. I don't mind. Anyway, the point is, I need my phone back, please.”

“Oh, hell no! You can't just give me the world’s largest headache, trick me with some kind of drug in juice psychosis, put loud speakers outside my house, and then emotionally blackmail me! Well, the jokes on you because you're not going to get me. I'm not going to tell you my address, so you can't have your fucking phone back!”

“Um, I'm really sorry to have to do this, but I'm coming right over!”

“What do you mean you're coming over? I haven't given you my-”

“I’m here.”

The voice was quiet, Like it was above Ayumi. She heard rhythmic, impatient tapping on her roof, accompanied by the distant sounds of “Um…Um!”

She ran upstairs, finally ready to give whatever this was a piece of her mind. She pushed open her bedroom door with force and blinked.

Hovering outside of her window was a sheepish woman in a purple dress on a broom… With glowing fingernails.

"Okay, seriously, what the hell?”