AU: First Pride

A little semi-canon drabble based on my first pride event ft. Ryu and Kai from TWTA.

-We should do a picnic now that the weather's nice!

- Ooh! I totally want to go! When are you free?

- Well, the next weekend we have the concert and the week after that we're going to Pride. How about the end of the month?

“We're going to Pride.” It’s not really a question and Kai doesn't want to interrupt the hearty conversation that follows after. He glances to the boy sitting next to him, but Ryu is animatedly discussing potential picnic locations with the others.

At times like this Kai can't help but feel out of place among Ryu's friends, no matter how welcoming they have been to him. Only a few months passed since he realized he wasn't all that straight and it is an even more recent development that Ryu and him started properly dating.

The others, including his boyfriend, have discovered their queerness years ago. Pride is just another topic on the growing list of things that goes over Kai's head during their meet ups. He understands the basic concept: a handful of people marching through the streets of the city, usually in flashy clothes. He wouldn't be completely against the idea - especially if this was something that would make Ryu happy. However, the thought of it being a very public event makes his stomach tense. Is it anything like in the news and movies? Would there people shouting obscenities at them from the sidelines? Would there be cameras showed in their faces at every step?

It is that last bit where he really starts to spiral. Only the people closest to them know about their relationship so far: Kai's best friend, Mai and Ryu's uncle, Kazuki. The friend group they are currently with probably made some guesses, but they haven't confirmed anything to them yet. It isn't ideal, but it is the best option for now, given how close-minded Kai's parents are. He tried to tell them about Ryu once but the minute he mentioned that he has a friend who happens to be gay, his mom freaked out and told him that he should stop talking to him all together. If she found out about Kai going anywhere near a pride event.. let alone, with a boyfriend.. it is best to not follow that trail of thought.

When Ryu eventually notices Kai's eyes on him, he rewards him with a smile and leans closer to ask about the dates the others have come up with for their little outing. Kai has to force himself to focus on the question at hand and not on how handsome Ryu looks today or how dazzling his smile is. He rejoins the conversation with renewed interest and under the guise of wanting to hear the others better, he leans forward onto the table, subseqently squeezing himself closer to Ryu. From the corner of his eye, he catches as Ryu fails to fight a smile off his face before he leans into the touch. Feeling Ryu's warmth through their touching arms makes Kai feel grounded and he files his worrries away for a later time.

As the chatter dies down a few hours later and the others start to say goodbye one after the other with mentions of curfews and tomorrow's classes, Ryu and Kai also head back to their high school dormitory. They decide to walk most of the way, grateful for the cool night breeze and the empty streets. Back in the dorm, it will be harder to find some privacy with their roommates around.

Ryu starts telling him some far fetched story about a time he accidentally walked out of a coffee shop without paying.

Kai burst out laughing, finding Ryu's dramatic storytelling endlessly entertaining. To be fair, he doesn't think there is any topic Ryu could talk about that he would find boring.

Ryu glances around and reaches for his hand when he's sure that there really isn't anyone else on the streets. They fall into a comfortable silence, walking together.

After a few minutes, Kai notices Ryu's careful glance on him, before he brings up another topic.

- Hey, I know that the others just bulldozed you with the whole Pride thing.

A familiar warmness spreads through Kai's chest. So, he did notice Kai's silent freak out earlier. The fact that Ryu knows him so well and always makes sure to check in how he feels is just one reason on the constantly growing list of why Kai likes him.

- It's not that I'm against the idea.. - Kai falters, unsure how to voice what really bothers him.

- It can be a lot, the crowd, the noise, people in drag. I get it, if it's not your thing.

- I'm not worried about that.

- But you are worried about going.

- I'm your boyfriend - Kai tries to argue, but he only manages to sound sullen - I should be allowed to go with you, if I want to.

Ryu's eyes are symphatethic as he understands what Kai is unable to say out loud without tearing up.

- You're worried about your parents finding out.

Kai's cheeks burn from shame as he avoids his boyfriend's eyes and nods. It isn't the first time they have this conversation but that doesn't make Kai feel any less guilty.

Ryu squeezes his hand.

- I'm sorry - Kai starts but his apology is quickly dismissed by Ryu.

- Hey, don't. It's not your fault that they are idiots.

Kai laughs at the sheer insolence of Ryu's words, as if he could ever talk about his parents like that. He's always been great at breaking the tension in difficult situations.

- I know how hard this is for you - Ryu continues, switching to a more serious note - and if you really want to go together, I can tell you what it's usually like. But you are allowed to change your mind, ok? I don't want you to force yourself to come..

Kai nods, wiping at his eyes with his free hand. As they continue on their walk, Ryu tells him about the first Pride he went to back when he was still living in the U.S. and how he was scared to go alone and had to bribe his uncle to chaperone him. Kai asks him if it's anything like the short clips he has seen on TV and if he's ever been to one in Japan.

---

Ryu was right, it is nothing like in the movies. The sheer number of people who showed up is astounding, not to talk about the noise and the heat of the sun.

- Well, I could have done without the heatwave for today, that's for sure - Ryu says as he looks up towards the sky, shielding his eyes with a hand - Are you doing okay?

Kai nods weakly. It is hard to hear him through the music that is blaring from at least 4 different directions, all the people chattering and whooing. His feet started hurting a while back and the sun's relentless stare is certainly not helping the situation. When he starts to feel dizzy it is hard to tell if it's because of the heat or if it is the panic settling in.

He stumbles forward and Ryu immediately reaches out to hold him up. The people around them slow down and give them a wide berth. Ryu's friends start looking for the closest place they can exit the march and guide them there. Kai tries to tell them that he's fine, that he just needs to sit down for a minute but they walk him to one of the first aid tents. A volunteer nurse checks his pulse and guides him to one of the makeshift beds. Ryu hovers around, not leaving his side for even a minute.

As he sits down, the nurse adds "you and your boyfriend can stay in here until you stop feeling dizzy". Kai opens his mouth to protest that they are together so they wouldn’t get into any trouble but in a way that wouldn’t hurt Ryu’s feelings either. But the nurse just leaves them in the little tent, without even turning back to look at them. Guilt and relief washes over him at the same time. Ryu comes to sit next to him, and gently takes Kai's hand in his.

- Are you okay? - His voice is full off concern, without any resentment but Kai cannot help but feel guilty for derailing the day.

- I'm sorry for ruining today.

- You haven't. You are here, with me. That is more than enough.

Ryu squeezes his hand to emphasize his words.

- I would really like to kiss you once the world stops spinning around me.

Ryu chuckles and hearing his laughter makes Kai feel marginally better.

- I can wait.

Kai leans his head on Ryu's shoulder and closes his eyes for a second. The two of them stay like that until Kai's world stops spinning out of control.

When the two of them exit the little tent, Ryu's friends immediately spot them. Kai can barely get a word into his apology before a bottle of water and snacks are shoved into his hands. While the little group tells him that they could skip the rest of the march this year in favor of getting boba, Ryu runs off to a guy nearby and manages to bribe their baseball hat off him in exchange for some of his favorite pride pins. He returns with a thriumphant grin and nonchalantly presses the hat onto Kai's head.

Kai feels really touched by how kind everyone is, and this time he starts to feel genuinely relaxed. He takes in the music, all the people happily walking around them, how much Ryu is in his element. He reaches out to touch their hands together and when Ryu looks at him, Kai takes his hand in his.