Chapter 10: Maternal Dissonance

Everything goes Null once again, but only for a brief moment.

Materializing before my eyes, is another scene. The creature rushes through the bathroom door and starts puking into the toilet. A queasy feeling hits my throat while my stomach churns, despite being unfazed by the sight of her vomit splashing into the toilet bowl.

Choking up bits and pieces of undigested food, she clasps a firm grip on the bowl in a desperate attempt to gather herself. Between each retch she gasps for air, as if pleading with her body for mercy. This lasts for a few more moments, until the queasiness in her stomach subsides.

Flushing down the thick chum-like substance, she watches as the slimy yellow sick swirls down in a vortex. Her arms tremble as she grabs on to the bathroom sink in an effort to pull herself up.

It takes her a second, but she manages to hold herself up against the sink. In another attempt to gather herself, she shakes her head and gazes at her reflection in the mirror. Noticing those long dark ears, it's easy to see she’s a dark elf. Strands of her long poppy-colored hair sit above her bloodshot hazel eyes as she wipes away the residual sick from around her lips.

While turning on the faucet, someone knocks on the door behind her.

“Ordelia, are you in there?” asks a woman from behind the door.

“...Yes, you can come in.” Ordelia responds while splashing water on her face.

The look of unease on Ordelia’s face as the young woman opens the bathroom door is almost palpable. It’s a stark contrast from the sort of expression I’d expect from her, given her calm nature before. Even the tone of her dark skin looks almost ghastly, though I imagine this is due to her sudden illness.

Entering the bathroom, the young high elf woman stares from behind at Ordelia’s reflection. Her heather gray eyes trembling as she stands there with pursed lips.

“Is it the serum again?” The young woman asks, averting her gaze from Ordelia’s glare while fingering a length of her blonde hair from over her eye.

“She didn’t mention the effects would be this bad this time.” Ordelia says while splashing more water on her face.

“Ms.Oppix did mention it would have some slight effects…”

“That was just her way of sugar coating it, but yes I’m aware. At least it isn’t as bad as the first dosage.”

“Weren’t you out for a full month with that one?”

“At least she was honest about the implications then. I regret leaving the kids for that long.” Ordelia remarks before splashing another handful of water, and turns off the faucet. She reaches for the rack next to the sink and dries her face with the towel.

“Well at least you aren’t dead!” The young woman says in a cheerful manner, bearing a stiff grin.

Ordelia chuckles. “Looking at the bright side as always, huh? You sound almost like the doctor, though I guess you’re right, Tiffany.”

“How’s your Instinct developing anyways? Is the imprinting having an effect on her?” Tiffany asks, walking up closer behind Ordelia.

“I think it may be developing too well. Ava doesn’t seem to want to interact with any of the other children anymore.” Ordelia says with a sigh.

“Isn’t that what Ms.Oppix wants? We should be able to prevent her current ‘plot’ from progressing.” Tiffany says, placing her hands on her hips. “She did mention that Ava is around the age where a ‘Turning Point’ usually happens.”

“That isn’t supposed to happen for the next two years, so that isn’t my concern now. I want to make sure she isn’t isolating herself from the other children.”

“Well, some of us are just natural born wall flowers.”

“That’s the exact reason why I need to get her out of her shell.” Ordelia says, her eyes twitching while staring in the mirror.

Tiffany places her hand on her shoulder, rubbing it gently. Ordelia glances over her shoulder at Tiffany, only to be met with the sobering gaze of her heather gray eyes. Ordelia grabs Tiffany in her sudden embrace, as a wealth of emotion swells in her chest.

“Let me look at how the Instinct is materializing. Just for a sec.” Tiffany says with a whisper before pulling away from her.

Taking a deep breath, Ordelia looks at the mirror and rolls up the sleeves of her gown. She caresses her left arm, causing the surface of her dark skin to squirm. Both of their expressions are somehow unfazed by this, as if it’s normal. Ordelia clasps her hands together as the vein-like segments underneath her skin travel to her fingertips.

The soft amber hue of her Influence materializes around her hands, perfectly coinciding with the tenderness of her heart. While the color of someone’s Influence doesn’t necessarily reflect their heart, for someone like her it can’t be just a coincidence. Though now that I realize, the way she’s placing her hands together looks familiar.

To my surprise, as she slowly separates her hands, red threads form between each of her fingers. Each of the strands bridging between her fingers look thinner and varied in length, but it is without a doubt the formation of The Cats Cradle.

“It seems to be progressing just fine. Do you think you can form it?” Tiffany asks while staring at her hands.

“I can try…” Ordelia says with a nod. She takes gentle care in twisting each of the threads between her fingers into a pattern; just like present-day Ava.

However, unlike Ava, Ordelia’s threads are shorter and far more delicate. Some of them even snap, making the entire process harder as she must mend together each end once again.

As she’s doing this, her bloodshot eyes start to glow an amber hue.

“I could have made the thread a bit thicker if I wasn’t so exhausted, but this is the best I could do right now.” She says with a sigh.

“No worries, I’ll mark it down as a success for tonight. Just take it easy for now until our meeting with her this weekend.” Tiffany says, pulling out her notepad and jotting down notes with her silver pen.

Ordelia glances down at her fingertips, making sure not to break the threads.

“Is something wrong?” Tiffany asks, noticing how much she’s been focusing on The Cat’s Cradle.

“Oh, it’s nothing. It’s just that the children love it when I do this, especially Ava.” Ordelia says with a smile, staring at her threads.

“Well, that is the point of this experiment after all. When you’re able to peer into their subconscious, it’s only natural that you’ll start to appeal to them.”

Ordelia scoffs. “You make it sound as if I have some malevolent intent.”

“We were chosen by Ms.Oppix because she trusts us. Not only is it our job to take care of the children, but as their guardians we have a responsibility to keep them happy. How could someone with ill-intentions be trusted to do that?” Tiffany says with a gleaming smile, yet her tone is far from thoughtless.

Hearing what she said, Ordelia shakes her head and slaps her cheeks. “You’re right, I guess I just need some time to get my head straight.”

“No need to apologize, just remember to get some rest. I’ll put the children to bed tonight.” Tiffany says with a cheerful tone before opening the door. “Now what bedtime story should I read tonight…”

After she leaves the room, Ordelia stands up and looks in the mirror. She has a sour look on her face, almost like something is amiss. She brings her face closer to the mirror, only to turn around and look behind her. It’s odd to see her on such alert since nothing seems out of the ordinary.

Taking another deep breath, she places her hands together once more. As her Influence starts to glow, she closes her eyes as if concentrating. While I can’t see anything, another strange feeling washes over me.

She opens her eyes. “Who are you?”

The question itself isn’t strange, but who could she be talking to? Her stance is stalwart and the inquisitive look in her eyes indicates that she’s talking to someone. Perhaps she’s going mad.

It’s something to consider, given the sort of experimentation she’s undergoing. For an ordinary dark elf, being the holder of such a frightening Instinct must have more side effects. Especially since it was given to her.

As I consider things more, I realize that can’t be it, for there isn’t a shred of delusion in her gaze.

I open my mouth. “Hello…”

She glances towards her left, before tracing the bathroom's reflection with her darting gaze. She’s aware that I’m here.

“Who are you?” she asks, glancing at the ceiling above the mirror.

“My name is Sintobi. How did you figure out I was here?”

“Hold on, I think I should ask the questions. Seeing as how your presence is inside me, are you related to the experiment?” she asks with her finger pointing at herself instead in the mirror.

I’m not sure how to answer that question. I’ve just been a spectator until now; practically walking in her shoes without her knowing. I never even considered that my presence was unknown, but I assume that’s thanks to Ava’s Cats Cradle.

If I were to explain to her the events that led me here, I wonder if she’d believe me. Would it even make a difference, this is just a memory of Ava’s past, right?

“As far as I know, I don’t believe I am.” I say to her forthright.

“That means you’re one of those demons that attach themselves to a host. Who is the witch doctor that hexed me?” she asks with an air of caution, right as a chilling feeling comes on. With her arms and shoulders tensing up, I wonder what sort of enemies she has to assume that.

I sigh. “No, I am not a demon, but I have been called one many times before.”

“Well being called a demon isn’t something worth bragging about either. It’s not the sort of thing anyone should take lightly, useless you are one of course.”

“I agree it is harsh. Though seeing as how my kind thrives during the night, many consider us indistinguishable from the genuine article.”

Ordelia’s eyes widened. “You’re a vampire?”

“Indeed I am.”

“What are you after!?” she shouts, slamming her hand against the sink. Gritting her teeth in dismay, as another chill runs down my spin.

“Relax, I don't intend on hurting you. In fact, I’m incapable of doing much since I was brought here by your Instinct.”

“Brought here with my instinct? How is that even possible?” she says looking at the entangled threads between her fingers.

“Another user sent me here against my will with the intention of judging me, but now I’m inside your head. It feels so weightless inside here.”

“Is that supposed to be some sort of veiled insult?” she asks, raising her eyebrow.

While I’m a bit lost for words with that question, at least her tone has lightened up. I expected her to be more lighthearted after seeing how she treats the children.

Ordelia clicks her tongue with a sigh. “Well, judging by how you answered my question, I have no reason to believe you’re lying. It’s true that with the usage of The Cat's Cradle I should be able to see the memories of my target, but I’m only able to hear them.”

“Is that why you’re able to connect with the children?” I ask her, probing further into the subject her and Tiffany mentioned earlier .

“You saw that too? Maybe that’s why I’ve been feeling sick...Well, whatever the case. Yes, I understand them more than anyone else ever could, and as their caretaker I must mend those wounds.” Ordelia declares, clasping her hands in a prayer-like fashion.

Seeing her serene gaze, I realize she’s the sort of creature who wears her heart on her sleeve. Someone who exudes devotion, to the degree it might almost be sacrificial.

One of those sacrifices is the very reason I’m even able to speak to her.

“Well, you are certainly a kind soul to take those children under your wing.”

“And I can tell you aren’t used to making compliments.” She remarks, making a slight at my dry tone of voice in here. “Now since I’ve answered your questions, It’s my turn. Who is this other user you mentioned? According to Ms.Oppix, I’m the only one with The Cat’s Cradle.”

“The other user…” I mumble, realizing I should choose my words.

Wouldn’t it be heartbreaking for her to know that I’m referring to Ava? The child she worries about the most. Even if this is some sort of memory, I almost don’t want her to know the truth.

“...is someone you wouldn’t want to meet; I mean she’s a real challenge to deal with. Crossing paths with her is the reason why I’m here in the first place.”

“It’s a girl then. What does she look like?”

“I don’t really remember; things are still a bit hazy.”

Ordelia purses her lips and raises her eyebrow. “Is that so? Then why do you remember her intentions for bringing you here in the first place?”

She’s on to me. “It was such a frightening experience; how could I forget it?”

“You can’t be serious. You’re a vampire, I doubt many things can frighten you.”

Nonsense. I remember the blinding flash of light illuminating the street corner as I stared at the weakened man. The voices of my friends yelling my name in a cacophony of screams that rang my very core.

A vampire's fear of the sun is innate, just like our bodies reaction to its rays. It was a necessary fear; an agreement with the powers that be to never toe the crack of dawn. But the fear I felt was irrational, for it was true fear.

“Just because I’m a vampire doesn't mean I can’t feel fear. I’m not a demon after all.” I respond to her with a chuckle.

“True, but you keep changing the subject, so I find it hard to believe. If you were planning on lying, you shouldn’t have volunteered so much information. Although I did do the same thing as well…” Ordelia says before crossing her arms. “Okay, let’s make a deal! If you tell me who this user is, we can both work together to set you free. I’m sure the doc knows something about this.”

While her offer does sound tempting, I’m not exactly in a hurry to leave. I still need to figure out how all of this relates to Ava and Ordelia’s Instinct. Being able to speak to her has been a huge development thus far, but it seems like I’m at an impasse.

Telling her about Ava might be a bad idea, but not telling her will only make things more difficult. Either could result in some semblance of progress, but telling her makes the most sense here. If there’s anyone who would have a clue as to what could lead Ava down her dark path, it would be Ordelia. Besides, this is just a memory.

“Fine fine, you really know how to pull someone's leg. I’ll explain to you how I got into this situation, but you must believe me.” I say to her, before clearing my throat.

Ordelia nods her head, confirming she’s all ears. As I am about to explain, I notice my reflection appear next to hers in the mirror. She glances to her right, only to see no one standing beside her. It’s like my reflection exists only in the mirror itself, but Ordelia doesn’t seem to mind it much.

Recounting the events that led me to the capitol building, I’m forced to relive the moment Mikel and Donavan died. I can still feel the moment my fingers clenched his heart, his life in the palm of my hand. Staring into his red eyes, until the very last moment where I extinguished his light, his soul.

“You didn't have a choice, that mayor forced your hand…” Ordelia reassures me, her gaze downcast.

“Maybe you’re right, but…”

I’ve been telling myself the same thing, but even still, an aching fills the pit of my stomach. Whether or not this feeling is my own, I cannot help but lament.

Ordelia leans towards the mirror. “So, what happened to your comrades and that invisible man?”

I sigh. “I haven’t seen any of them since I was engulfed by the darkness.”

“And that darkness is why you’re here.” Ordelia ponders, placing her hands on her hips. While I can sense a bit reluctance in her tone, her readiness to believe my story isn't what I expected.

As I’m describing the mare-like features of the culprit that brought me here, the inquisitive expression on Ordelia’s face dwindles into a look of worry. My shoulders start to tremble.

“That sounds alot like…” Ordelia mutters, the words escaping her lips with a gasp.

She needs to know. Detailing her further, Ordelia realizes that I’m referring to Ava. From her pale white skin, to her bright jade green eyes that contrast with her smooth light brown hair, the similarities are too hard to ignore. Despite the fact that Ava has grown taller and slender with age.

“You’re describing little Ava, but how could that be?” she yells, slamming her palm against my reflection in the mirror. “And what do you mean she’s older, you mean to tell me you’re some sort of time traveler? Quit it with the jokes and tell me the truth, dammit!”

“I promised to tell you the truth and this is it. The child you’re taking care of is the current user of The Cat's Cradle. She is known for her ruthlessness and has become infamous in The Underground-”

“Shut up, you’re lying! All of what you’re saying is a lie! I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you to tell me the truth…” she shouts while covering her eyes.

I knew this would happen, but I didn’t expect her to go into immediate hysteria. If nothing I say will get through to her, I won’t be able to find out anything else. Maybe I should mention something only she and her partner would know; she’ll have to believe that. Or perhaps that will only make things worse…

“...There was a book.” I blurt out.

Ordelia pauses. The room goes quiet as she lowers her hands from her face bit by bit, revealing the tears welling up in her eyes. Looking as if her greatest fear has come to life.

“What did you say?” she asks, her voice still shaky.

“Right before she used The Cat's Cradle, a large book appeared behind her out of thin air. All of the pages were empty, except two.”

“What was on the pages?”

“Headless Horseman.”

Her arms fall limp as her eyes tremble in fear, causing her tears to flow. Biting down on her lip, a whirlwind of emotion gathers in my stomach.

“An outcome like that could only mean one thing...that I failed.” Ordelia says with a somber tone, as blood trickles down to her chin.

“You failed at what?” I ask, prying further.

“That book isn’t supposed to manifest on its own, that means I wasn’t able to bookmark her Tale. The Ava you met is no longer a mortal being, but a sentient work of fiction.” Ordelia continues with a damning tone. “Did she ever mention how she ended up that way? If she did, Tiffany and I can work on a solution.”

“No, she never mentioned what set her down that path…”

That’s because I assumed she was just evil. I smacked her hand away when she needed me the most, even when she was showing remorse for her actions. If I had just listened to her…

Ordelia starts pacing the floor. “She’s a bit troubled, but I know she has a good heart. If I don’t use The Cat's Cradle to subdue her Tale, the ‘Turning Point’ could lead her to a climatic end. Ms.Oppix wants to prevent such a thing from happening, so I was assigned the task of accomplishing that.”

“What does any of that even mean?” I ask her.

“It means that terrible things could happen, and a Turning Point is the trigger. Think of it like a moment that defines a creature's origin story, at least that’s the way Ms.Oppix explained it.”

This Ms.Oppix certainly sounds like quite the character, maybe I should try talking to her. No, that wouldn’t be possible. This is a memory after all and a vivid one at that.

“Maybe it’s just destiny. We all are destined for something, so maybe that’s the path she’s meant to walk.”

Ordelia turns her head sharply towards the, her eyes filled with animosity. “Excuse me?”

I know she’s giving me a second chance to choose my response, but there’s no reason to fear her. She's but a memory after all.

“It is as I said. That is my firm belief.”

Suddenly a strange haze blurs my vision, along with a tense feeling in the pit of my stomach. A festering feeling that continues to grow each second. I notice myself holding my stomach in my reflection, just as a mirror should.

My senses heighten to an unfathomable degree, making it harder to keep myself together with such intensity. It’s a desire unlike those before it, one that beckons me to act. But what exactly should I be doing? My chest burns with this intense desire to correct those who’ve wronged me.

“You look sick, is something the matter?” Ordelia asks, still bearing the intense enmity in her gaze. The bitterness in her tone of voice suggests she isn’t asking out courtesy, but disdain.

I try to speak to her, but no sound leaves my throat. I notice her staring at my reflection as I attempt to choke up the words, but nothing comes out. Ordelia closes her eyes, closing the window that allows me to see this memory, and takes a deep breath. When she opens them, my reflection disappears from the mirror.

I can still hear my own thoughts, but they no longer reach her. Her face twists in further displeasure, causing her intense desire to smother me further. Her amber colored Influence obscures my vision, leaving her perspective to close in before me.

Peering through the small gap in front of me I notice her reaching for the doorknob, as something starts pulling me back.

“Ordelia!” I call out to her, but she doesn’t answer. I have a bad feeling about this. I need to stop her before she does something.

As I continue shouting her name, I notice her hand stop as she’s about to grab the knob. She can hear me. It was for a slight moment but it has to be the case. Why else would she hesitate?

“...”

Ordelia’s hand starts trembling, but she clenches her fist before grabbing the doorknob, winning against her urge to respond to me. At the same moment, the strange force pulls me away from her perspective with its gravity. It’s clear to me now that the reason this is happening is because she’s ignoring my presence.

I’ve been shut out…everything is Null again.