Episode 0 - Lap Pillows and Caves

Lap-pillows are the best, aren't they? Warm, soft, exposed thighs, a feeling of comforted security, and an absolute trust in somebody.

"You've got a silly smile," the lap's owner whispers above me, with a stupid grin of her own. My partner and vision of loveliness, Eshu, is a playful soul, mischievous even; a lap-pillow is pretty tame by her standards, ahem. 

Her short, cropped hair is this enchanting shade of magenta, and big eyes seem to sparkle within her soft face. Not so big as old anime, mind you, although that has its charms. Her eyes are a more modern style; the current standard just fits well, you know? That's the kind of world we live in after all. 

The world of 'Escape'. In an age of shut-ins, Hikikomoris, Neets, layabouts, and bums, media that lets us feel at peace has become a premium. The video game developer To-Sua noticed an opportunity in the making and began developing the ultimate escapist fantasy - a fully immersive game world where the human mind is permanently transferred into - a real-life isekai!

Where we are now is the beta. When it was announced, tens of thousands clamoured to take part. You donate your body, your family receives a stipend, and you are transported to the world of Escape. Our real bodies - my obese, ugly excuse for a sack of meat - are left behind in a sort of coma, best thing for them, no doubt about it.

"Hey," a soft voice calls from the doorway. It's a little monotone but with cute pitches that create a sort of gap-moe to die for. It belongs to Ko, a woman of brilliant white hair, shining eyes, and a body to make models envious. Currently, she's wearing a rather simple cream coloured dress - a stark contrast to Eshu’s more slapdash tank top and shorts. Ko is my other partner. Are you jealous yet?

"Are you two playing without me?"  Above me, Eshu laughs. I search for a placating answer, "Not exactly, it's only a lap-pillow -- What, hey!" 

With a thud, I find myself rolled off paradise and down onto the floor. It doesn't hurt, mind you, there's no real pain in Escape, unless you enable it, but that's for a very specific cohort of players… 
   Actually, it does sting a bit, but we call that ‘phantom pains’, feeling a numb sensation because our brain expects it. Nothing worse than that.

Two pairs of beautiful eyes stare down at me, “"Just?"”

"Ah-heh, maybe we could, er, play a game for three instead?"

****

"Yahhhhhh," Eshu yawns, stretching arms overhead, "That was a good game." 
    Walking next to her, Ko nods vigorously, "A very good game."

I sigh a couple of steps in front of them, "You two could try to be a little more classy about it."
    I say that, but it really was an excellent 'game', it always is, heh. Pain settings might be disabled, but every other sensation in this world is very vivid. 

They come up on either side of me, talking an arm each so that I look as though I'm escorting two beautiful ladies to the ball. Of course, they quickly ruin that image by leaning forward and exposing far too immodest an amount of cleavage, "You weren't such a prude a few minutes ago," Ko all but purrs while Eshu grins in concert.

I find myself blushing before smiling.

    To think I'd be flanked by such amazing ladies. To think I could live like this at all! My body is broad-shouldered, tall, and all absolute muscle. Hair jet black like all the cool leads, and eyes blue in a way only anime eyes can achieve. I can eat as much as I want, laze around all day and never gain a single pound here. It's nothing like that worthless body I used to have.
     On the other 'side', the only women I saw on a regular basis were the 2D kind within a screen. 

But this place, it's what we deserved! It wasn't me that was wrong, it was the world, it made me that way, but here? Just look around at those rolling green hills, the waving grass, the patches of colourful flowers; vivid red carnations and golden daffodils swaying beneath the gorgeous, deep blue sky. You can smell the clean air!     

The odd hint it's a video game world, sure enough - a slightly choppy movement in the far distance, or odd glimpses of some polygons if you hyperfocus on a blade of grass - but I take that as a plus. Back home, all I ever did was sit at a computer, gorge on food and play a very, ummm, single player version of the 'game'. A new world, an isekai fantasy at that, is what I always dreamed of!

I glance back up the soft dirt track at our little abode. It's a pretty design. Single-story, soft pastel paint - Mediterranean, I think you'd call it. I live there, in that house, my own home, no mortgage! That's the biggest fantasy of them all, eh? And with these two wonderful people, who accept and like me for who I am - for my soul, not the shitty container it used to be in.

"How about a quest before lunchtime?" 

"Sounds good!" Eshu chimes in.

I touch the 'sky' to summon a light, transparent box.
   'Escape' is only in an early closed beta, so things like the UI tend to be a bit generic, but honestly, that's barely even a caveat to living a whole new life. There is no log-out button. Entering this world is a one-way ticket, and all the better for i. 

The main world is a reasonably light fantasy-type kingdom, the sort actual fans of good fantasy despise, but very suitable for the needs of isekai lovers. There are settlements with Non-Player-Characters, some 'natural wonder' type sites, and most of all, lots of empty spaces for plenty of player bases like our own.
    The developers had made several regular VR-style games before, so using their assets, players can take on 'quests', adventures of all sorts. They even partnered with some anime studios to allow you to play through your favourite shows. Those who didn't agree to that partnership have royalty-free versions instead, haha.

I select the high school scenario we've been progressing with lately. It's a wholesome comedy romp where we take on three of the student council roles in this school, and an 'NPC' handles the fourth. We've been enjoying it a lot, very funny writing, though a bit light on the fan service for our tastes. 

   For a moment, my vision goes a pale blue and the noughts and ones that make up my consciousness in this world flux and rewrite. With a smile on my face, I'm ready to enter the temporary subworld for another fun day of LARPing.

"Huh?" The word falls dumbly from my mouth. This is not the generic visual novel high school I’m used to.
   "Where the hell?" 

We're in a cave, I think? Grimy stone walls surround us; water drips gently from little stalactites in the ceiling, and small puddles litter the rocky ground. I can feel the heightened humidity perk my skin.

"Welcome, humans. Welcome!" I stare up. Floating in the half-light just a few feet off the ground,  barely beneath the oppressively low ceiling, is what I can only call some kind of ‘demon’. Roughly human size but clearly not one, all black and grey-skinned with little elf ears and bright amber eyes. 

I feel panic rising - no, it's the familiar hand of anxiety, of a lack of control, of experiences I don't feel equipped for. I glance side to side, momentary relief in seeing Eshu and Ko with me, also staring up at the creature.

Is this a bug? A glitch? Did we get teleported into someone else's quest by accident? I mean, the developer was infamous for such things, but Escape is the exception, the one game they didn't rush out and expect fans to patch, right?

"So listen, K'," the little demon says in a slightly coarse, impish voice, "The apocalypse is comin' to destroy this world and everyone in it, and so, I quite need you all to be my slaves now, got it?"

What. The. Hell?