A Goddess with a Temper…

The first thing I do upon opening my eyes is curse my past self because I wake up with a splitting headache. No matter how angry you are, you shouldn’t take it out on yourself and drink so much you can barely make it home. Though… Thinking back I definitely understand why I did it.

Anyway.

I remember being too stingy to go to a bar, so I just bought a whole bag of cans at the local konbini and wanted to retreat to my small apartment to drink myself into a stupor. And then… Well. Fuzzy. I remember opening the cans and then…

I blink into the blinding light. It must be past noon. The sunshine doesn’t reach my bed before that during winter. That said… the sun sure is awfully bright today. I turn my head to the side to avoid its glare, but somehow it’s coming from all directions at once. I don’t remember getting home, but I must be… Hopefully.

As I get used to the light, I spy a woman dressed in blinding white, a long flowing dress like a wedding gown. She is sitting in a large chair, which is positioned like a throne on a slightly raised platform. I can’t make out her face against the light very well. Yet all of this doesn’t confuse me as much as the floating text next to the chair, shining in bright orange.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 10/100

The woman on top of the throne crosses her legs with a bit too much enthusiasm. The throne shakes and flickers. Something in my head shakes as well.

Wait.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 9/100

“Alright. Name?”

I blink confusedly at the person in front of me. The bright light has either dimmed or I’ve gotten used to it. As I concentrate on her face, text starts to shimmer in front of her, but as soon as it appears, it disappears, like a reflection on water.

“Name?” she asks again, angrily bringing her fist down on the throne’s armrest.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 5/100

“Your throne is—”

“Name!” she demands again. The fist flies once more.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 1/100

“You should—”

“Enough!” she yells.

I can see the remaining digit tick down and the letters turn bright red as the woman stomps her foot.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 0/100

The wooden throne collapses under her and she falls with a shriek, two big, white wings unfolding on her back, but they achieve nothing except flinging debris everywhere. A piece of wood hurls past my head. I duck in reflex as she yells.

“What did you do?”

“…nothing?”

“Now listen here, pal…”

Pal??

“I’m your personal goddess now. Erya, the Goddess of Light. I am the highest authority in this pantheon… and you just destroyed my throne!”

That poor chair obviously suffered Erya’s temper long before I arrived. I don’t exactly want to tell her that and rile her up even more.

“Keeping quiet? Very well.”

She waves her hand and a new throne appears where the rubble had been, as if nothing has ever happened.

[Throne of the Goddess]

Attributes: Holy

Durability: 100/100

Why yell at me when you can magically make yourself a new one??

The goddess Erya sits down on her new throne and crosses her legs. As she sits down, there is a golden flash of light, to which I briefly close my eyes.

“Now tell me your name so I may judge your skills accurately.”

I sigh.

Fine.

“My name is Hiroyuki Satoyama.”

“That is a long name.”

“People usually just call me Yuki,” I say with a shrug.

“Very well then, Yuki.”

The floor beneath me starts glowing. It’s like I’m standing on a bright neon light. I can see it even though my closed eyes. This goddess is intent on giving me a full-blown migraine.

“Divine Appraisal? Are you kidding me?” Erya says and the light turns off as if a switch had been flipped.

I blink into the world, afterimages of the blinding light flashing in front of my eyes as I regard the goddess, who is moving her hands in the air as if she’s browsing a dating app. She seems increasingly annoyed.

“That can’t be. I’m the leader of the pantheon. I can’t have summoned such a useless person…” she mumbles.

“Hey…”

She opens her hand and in an instant, a staff appears in it. It is long and slim, with a little, golden angel figurine at the top. I narrow my eyes at it and the text appears again.

[Divine Staff of Holy Light]

Attributes: Holy, Wind

Durability: 100/100

“What do you see?” Erya asks.

I relay the text to her and she nods. Wait. There’s some small print. As I concentrate on it, the text comes closer.

Notes: Staff stolen from the Wind Goddess’ treasures and enchanted with Holy attributes after the Light Goddess’ own staff was accidentally broken after a week of heavy drinking.

I put both hands over my mouth. I can’t laugh. Not now.

“I suppose the Appraisal skill is rare, and Divine Appraisal may show you more details than the average skill user, but… what are you supposed to do against the Demon King? Tell him that his sword has a Darkness attribute? He knows that. We all know that.”

“Then what was supposed to happen here?” I ask and point to all of myself.

“You were summoned with my blessing, so you should be a warrior of light! A hero with not only the potential, but the real power to strike at the Demon King’s heart with light magic! And now look at you—a puny human with the ability to appraise items… Sure, there aren’t many of them, but…!!”

“It’s not like I chose to have this power…”

“You did, in a way. During divine summons, a human receives a skill that enhances their natural abilities and inclination. But that doesn’t explain why you were chosen at all. What did you do in your world?”

“I work in human resources.”

“What is that?”

“I was responsible for hiring people… developing talent…”

“I summoned a freaking guild worker… The other goddesses will laugh at me for centuries.”

Erya wails in her throne, which steadily loses durability, but I keep my mouth shut since she’ll likely just blame me again. Instead I take a look around. We're standing on what seems to be a stony platform in the middle of the sky. Fluffy clouds surround us, with the blue sky visible above. Everything is bathed in golden sunshine, as I would expect from a Goddess of Light.

“Yuki,” she says suddenly and my gaze snaps back to her. “Can you appraise me?”

I try to concentrate on her like I did on the staff, but the only text which pops up is related to her clothes. It’s made of materials I’ve never even heard of before, enchanted to the max. I shake my head.

“Too bad. If you could appraise people’s skills, you’d at least be a bit useful… Alright, then. I can’t change it now, the summoning energy is gone. I’m going to send you to the city, in which the main temple of my faith lies. You will meet my followers, who will prepare you for your journey ahead.”

“My journey? For what?”

“Are you dumb?”

“I should hope not.”

“I should be the one hoping that… The journey to defeat the Demon King together with the other four heroes.”

“Me?”

“You.”

She points at me and my suit flickers a few times. Suddenly I stand naked in front of the throne. With a manly squeak I cover myself and shrink down to the floor.

“What the hell?”

“You can’t go down there in that weird stuff. You stick out like a sore thumb. You need the guise of a hero.”

“My phone was in that pocket!”

“Whatever that is, you won’t need it.”

My body is shining and from my hands and feet inward, new clothes are appearing like a magical girl transformation sequence. In no time, I am dressed like a literal Prince Charming, in what seems to be a white and gold riding ensemble. I’m fully expecting a horse to materialise next to me. I look closer at the clothing and a whole range of stats jump at me. High durability, some fancy material name I don’t even know, and a whole range of magic resistances. These clothes even have a self-cleaning enchantment!

“That should be sufficient for now,” Erya says.

I don’t think I’ll get another set and I don’t want to be naked, so I just agree.

“And you think with this I won’t stick out?”

“Of course you will,” Erya replies. “But for the right reasons. The Hero of Light needs to be dressed as such.”

“Okay…”

Erya shakes her head. “The last hero wasn’t so disagreeable.”

“… what do you mean ‘the last hero’??”

“Every ten years there is enough energy to summon a set of heroes to this world to face the Demon King.”

“Every…” I gulp. “How long have you been doing this?”

“About six hundred years.”

“… and the success rate?”

Erya laughs. “Do you think I’d still be doing this if any of them succeeded?”

Well, there go my chances. Probably died in my world, most likely will die in this world soon. Wow.

“Send me back.”

“That’s not how this works.”

“Do I look like I care? I remember now. I was run over by a truck, I think. But I’m not dead. Send me back!”

Erya rolls her eyes and snaps her fingers. A blinding light erupts between us and then I am falling through the sky. Wind rushes past my face as I fight to open my eyes. In front of me, a vast landscape stretches out in all directions, curving towards the horizon, as if I’m looking at the world from a plane window. It is lush and green, vast forests and wide plains visible even from this altitude. I can make out high mountains in the distance, shrouded in dark mist. Directly below me is a large city, circular in layout, with a wall surrounding it. There are fields and small homesteads dotting the area around it. A large river meanders through the plain it's situated in, the water glittering as it reflects the sunlight.

“This is Atol.”

Erya’s voice rings in my head. I can’t decide if I should stare at the world below and marvel at its beauty, or should scream in terror at falling towards it to my death.

So I’m doing both.

“Stop shouting. Listen.”

“I’m falling!”

“I won’t let you die, you idiot. Look up. Beyond the mountains.”

I manage to tilt my head. Behind the mists there is… shadow. It’s like the fog of war in tactical games, where you can’t see what’s beyond the area you’ve already explored. I look around. All around the plains, the shadow is encroaching. It’s like the green pastures are an island surrounded by a dark sea.

“The city of Atol is the last place in this area to withstand the Demon King’s army. It lives under my protection, but my power extends only so far. The other four goddesses reign over places just like this, and each has summoned their own heroes to defend their territory.”

“Defend?”

“We should work together to defeat the Demon King, you’re right, but when these cities fall, all is lost. We have to secure them first and build a foothold. Then we can attack him.”

That’s what six hundred years of lost battles will do, I suppose. I can already see myself become the next victim.

“So you tried the same thing for hundreds of years without success and this time you think it’ll work?”

There is no response for a while. The ground rushes ever closer and as I pass through a cloud, I can feel the moisture on my skin.

“Erya?”

No response still. The field below looks soft, but with the speed I’m aiming to meet it, no amount of grass will break my fall.

“ERYA!!!”

“Go to my temple in the centre of the city to meet my followers at sunset. They will explain their situation to you.”

“GROUND!!!!!”