Raiona’s Journal

Spring Day 33

Today I start a diary.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

See? I know my letters and numbers. I don’t know why I know other letters too, but I do. Mother says I should learn every talent I can. Probably because I do not have a lion form. Or maybe because I get sick too much. But not as much as mother.

Father says I need “options.” I don’t know what that means. I just know things that others don’t. Father told me to never speak publicly of any memories that doesn’t match with anything I am learning now. To observe first.

Like the way I am writing now. I could only share it between father and mother. I have to learn to speak as my father and mother do. Who taught me the languages I know that nobody else does?

Spring day 37

Today, I remembered the journal.

Mother was tired, so I nursed her. Sometimes I follow Father on his kingly duties. Both are boring. Being a princess can be boring. Even classes are boring. Sleepy.

Spring day 39

Today, mother noted that I was not having fun on my tutorials and made father group me with other learners from nobility. They made me swear to secrecy to keep my “other” memories under the surface.

Spring day 41

Today, on my second day of group lessons, I met an annoying boy.

He thinks he knows everything. And to my surprise, the annoying boy does know everything. He got the same marks as I did.

My father seems to have taken a liking over him. I don’t. I will beat him in studies. If I can’t, I’ll just beat him up. Till morrow.

Spring day 46

Today, I told the annoying boy to stop having the same answers as me all the time.

He ignored me! How rude. Who does that? I told him he should develop his own personality and not copy everything I do. And that it was a mistake that father rescued him.

He became a bird on fire. He must be of rare species. I have never seen someone change into a bird, let alone change into a bird and then be on fire. He smelled delicious though. I may have seen some swans and eagles change, actually, now looking back.

Spring day 47

Today, another day of lessons. 

I did not notice angry bird’s presence. He probably even arrived late… Well, I did not see nor care because the new instructor was kinda cute.

Spring day 48

Today, the cute teacher wasn’t at class but I saw a tiny white baby horse when fetching medication for my mother from the east wing.

I thought they only come in brown or black, or any random colored patch. Never that clean white. I asked why the baby horse had a plaster on the middle of its head.

Are they hurt? That's probably why they’re locked in the clinic garden. I was told that the princess wasn't allowed to enter the area with the horse. Princess this princess that. Yeah yeah who cares.

Spring day 49

Today, handsome tutor is back. He even complimented my drawing.

But he also complimented the angry bird’s art. That wasn’t necessary. Angry bird’s face is art in itself. He warned me to not tease angry bird today as we had more students and lots of papers today that could easily go in flames. I asked him how old he is and he said he was 12. He looks and acts like an adult. I am 8.

Spring day 50

Today, the weather was beautiful. 

Not even the presence of Riye was enough to stop me from escaping class to enjoy myself under the sun. The class had an outdoor excursion and I cross paths with them while I was blindly looking up trying to catch a bird that looked like a noisefowl.

I got a massive telling off by my father. Mother looked pleased with me even if I was misbehaving. She tries to hide it from father but I can feel that she approves of my antics. As she says, I should go and experience youth. I am happy that I am with my family. Still not impressed with the lengthy ‘princess this’ and ‘princess that’ telling off that I received from father and his advisors however.

Spring day 51

We had a test and me and angry bird got the same correct answers. All. This won’t do.

Spring day 52

Rest day today but I am writing from the common library.

I went to the elder’s library initially but angry bird was already there. I can’t believe he would do this. I am already studying in my free time so I can get better marks. But he is also studying. If we are both studying then who is going to lose? Maybe I should distract him. Also wasn’t he flammable? He really shouldn’t be within libraries anyways.

Spring day 53

Update after the library kerfuffle yesterday.

I went to look for the white horse with forehead plaster so I could take it to angry bird and bother him. Maybe will blame him for taking the horse from the enclosure. I found the horse and brought it to the library where I saw angry bird.

He was surprised I came back and looked happy. Guess he is not angry all the time. I got found out for stealing borrowing the horse anyways so I got told off again. Angry bird became even happier. He’s a happy bird for a change.

Today, my father met with other officials and some of them brought children around my size or age. One or two boys are probably in the same classes as me. Also the tall girl who wore a very pretty dress looked sad. I did not feel like socialising so I hid behind father the whole time and ate what I could within reach.

Spring day 54

I can't miss the beautiful weather. So today, I escaped class again.

But Riye caught me as I was going to the fairy garden and put me back to class. I was made to apologize for bothering the class. They could’ve just started without me. Angry bird specifically noticed my absence and asked for me, that’s how I got caught early on.

I will forgive Riye. Because he is handsome. And he was just being a good instructor. But I can’t forgive angry bird for snitching on me. I do not want to be treated any differently. I wish I wasn't a princess.

Spring day 55

Today, my mother was sick so I got the day off class to be beside her. We read books and I played the flute for her. There is also a dance I do that my mother calls the swan dance. She loves that. I do not remember who taught me but I just know how to do it.

I particularly love the music mother plays from the plucking instrument. It goes with the swan dance. She can make beautiful music from a lot of musical tools.

Spring day 56

Today, my mother felt better, so my parents took me for a walk.

I love the daystar and its warmth. I love that I can see some of the moon even in daylight. Sometimes, all three moons are there too. The road of rocks on the sky is looking sparkly on the skies today as well. I wish I could get one of them.

Father said that they may look pretty, but those are actually dangerous rocks. Hmmm I do not know about that. Pretty is pretty.

Spring day 57

Today, mother was sick again. Sicker than usual. I stayed with her.

Riye came around to deliver notes from classes. So handsome. I love his eyes and long curly hair. I tried avoiding eye contact with him as he politely greeted mother, so I pretended to look through the notes. Angry bird’s handwriting. Why would Riye make Angry bird write for me?

I told my mother that I wanted to marry Riye. She laughed and said she will see what she can do because someone like Riye has a list of marriage proposals. Excuse me? Who cares about that, I am the princess. I should get first choice on everything. Mother said she can talk to Aunt Chia, her best friend, Riye’s mother. Now we are talking.

Spring day 58

Today, I managed to join a portion of the lessons after making sure mother was painless and asleep.

Riye even escorted me from home to the lesson room. I can’t believe angry bird looked happy to see me, but only for a fraction of a second. The moment Riye came into the room after me, angry bird was already sulky. I wanted to ask him what was wrong with him but I instead thanked him for the notes. Not because Riye told me to. He looked a bit cheerful after that. What a moody boy. Or bird. Moody bird.

Spring day 60

Today, there was a festival in the city.

I went with my father. He is the king actually. So he has to show up. It is noteworthy how different he is at home and in public. My job was to stand beside him and I think I did a perfect job. He introduced me and I just had to smile. Everyone was admiring me and my father. I wish my mother was there as well.

Below the platform, in front of us, I can see Riye standing behind the generals and advisors. He must be one of the ‘promising youth’ I keep hearing about. There is another girl that looks like my age and size beside him though? I think she’s the sad tall girl with the pretty dress from the other day. So it’s true? What mother said about him having a list of marriage prospects? Girl watch out.

Spring day 61

Today, I am very happy.

Mother was well enough to go outside and she came with us and father on our stroll around the festivals. Mother got tired quickly so I was allowed to walk around on my own while father tended to kingly matters and also my mother’s well-being.

Well, I thought I was allowed. The moment I thought I got freedom to explore, I was swarmed.

I discovered that I am unable to tell people that I am uncomfortable and I just let them do as they please. Seems like I am only capable of being honest about my feelings to angry bird. Maybe this is why I am writing to you whoever will read this. I have to talk to someone. And when I am at the height of my discomfort, Riye stepped in to save me.

He said there was an official business I need to attend and he took me away with ease. He asked me if I was fine and that was the first proper conversation we had. Like, not pleasantries or lessons.

I said I was fine because he saved me. And I thanked him. I was so embarrassed to ask anything about him, anything personal. Or about that girl that stayed close to him and kept looking at him. I only know his name and age. That’s it.

He changed into a lion and I sat on his back. We passed by a part of the town I haven’t seen yet, as he jumped from roof to roof. I think he was trying to cheer me up. I had fun. Even if we didn’t speak the rest of the way. Upon return, I did not get the ‘princess this princess that’ carry on, instead I was welcomed with a hug from my worried parents.

I explained that Riye saved me and that I should marry him. Mother was unable to hold her laughter back and had to chuckle out of her usual demure self. Father pretended to be strict. But I saw a glimpse of him blush at mother’s laughing.

Father said he would allow me to marry who I wanted but the person must prove themselves to him first. As my father, and as the king. Riye hurriedly excused himself that he almost slipped off while reversing out of the royal tent. I have never seen a scared lion in my life. I didn't even know lions can demonstrate fear to begin with.

I do not have any animal sense as I am not from this world so I can’t sense the primal animal fear the citizens, or even outsiders, feel when my father is sending out warning vibrations. But someone other kids described it to me. The said father was scary.

Well I was from this world. Then I wasn’t. Mother said she will explain to me when I am older.