How I Fight Sober

“I knew what sort of quest I signed up for. I knew the job I was going to do, I knew what I was going to wear, and I knew how I was going to act… kind of. However, if I’m treated like a punching bag without being informed beforehand, then this is my own quest to take on.”

Kitezh carried the mop and bucket to the bar. She saw Nadia still chatting with some guys at a table.

Kitezh carefully opened the cupboard above the prep table.

CREAK!

Kitezh paused. The cupboard was barely open. Kitezh put her hand through the crack to feel for the helmet.

WOOSH!

BAM!

“AH!” yelled Kitezh.

The cupboard door suddenly slammed shut on her fingers. She pulled her hand out. And saw the markings from the door.

Kitezh turned around. Nadia was starting at her. She was tucking something away in her skirt.

“I felt it. That was wind!” thought Nadia. “If it’s wind, then Nadia is probably using wind magic from a wand. That was definitely what it felt like during that so called accident earlier.”

Kitezh looked at the cupboard that had her helmet behind the door.

“But, is it really magic? What if it’s actually some sort of phenomenon. Nadia has suddenly turned hostile on me. Could it be she is one of the phenomena after me?” pondered Kitezh

“Hey, are you gonna clean this shit or not?” yelled the angry customers

Kitezh made her way to the table and cleaned up the mess.

“No. She would have definitely done something a bit more extreme against me. Though, this whole attitude she has. Maybe she doesn’t need to use full magic attacks, and actually wants to try and make me submissive to her. After all, Lev wasn’t trying to kill me. He wanted to take me back alive,” Kitezh thought, as she continued mopping up the floor.

“For now, I know Nadia is plotting something new. I need to prepare for it.”

Kitezh finally picked up the solid pieces of dropped mugs and plates, and put them on the used platter.

“Kitezh! I’ve got a new order for you~,” sang Nadia.

Kitezh left the platter down on a table, and set the mop aside. She is staring at Nadia more intensely. She looked at her skimpy clothes carefully. She knows she is hiding something malicious under there.

Nadia brought the platter with an obvious trap. It was a pyramid of beer mugs stacked up like a pyramid.

“It’s better for you to make it one trip without spilling a single drop. Ohoho, but seeing you’re a klutz, I would be extra careful,” teased Nadia.

“Thank you, Nadia,” said Kitezh in a fake cutesy tone.

Kitezh grabbed both sides of the platter.

“Ah-ah. One hand, Kitezh. It’s a better presentation for the guys,” said Nadia.

Kitezh lifted the platter with one hand. It was even heavier than the last order she delivered. Kitezh slowly made her journey to the table at the end of the tavern. This included a small flight up some steps.

Kitezh looked at the platter as the mugs of ale were just ready to spill all over her. Nadia is clearly going to cause a disaster and humiliate her again.

Kitezh looked at the table she just cleaned up. She thought about how getting into an accident is inevitable, so she needed to prepare for it.

Instead of making to her destination, Kitezh began walking over to the previous table she had the first accident.

“What the hell is she doing?” Nadia thought.

Kitezh turned around, and saw the mop she left leaning on a table before.

“Is she stalling for time or something? Or is she seriously this slow and can’t follow simple instructions?”

Nadia saw that right behind Kitezh and the towering beer mugs were the rowdy guys chatting up again.

“If they’re right behind Kitezh, maybe I cause a second accident that completely covers them in ale instead. They’d be so pissed off, and I could show off to them. I am true queen of this tavern tonight after all.”

Kitezh picked up the mop, and looked up at Nadia for a second. Nadia stared right back at her. Kitezh then turned her back on her and faced the people behind her.

FWOOSH!

A large gust a wind blew at Kitezh. Her arm carrying the platter lifted up higher in the air. Kitezh lost the balance, and the platter angled down towards the customers instead.

CRASH!

“Ohoho! Now you’ve really done it, Kitezh. I’m going to- HUH?!”

Nadia was stunned at the sight she saw.

In one of her hands, Kitezh was holding up a platter of the beer mugs that survived at the base of the pyramid. The rest of the towered mugs have gone missing.

In her hand, she held the mop forward. However, right at the end of the mop was the handle of the bucket that she worked with. The bucket hung right above one of the rude patrons at the table, who was staring right up at it like a knife to his face.

Kitezh put the mop and bucket down. The bucket was filled with all the ale and broken glass of the mugs that would have caused the disaster.

Kitezh then did something unpredictable. She set the platter down on the floor. She slowly crawled on top of the table, and looked directly at the man she saved in a domineering way.

“I’m terribly sorry, I’m such a klutz! I’ll do anything to make it up,” Kitezh said in a devilish sexy way.

“AH! AAAAAAH!”

The patron stumbled out of his seat and ran out of the tavern.

The patrons at the table she was supposed to deliver to witnessed it all, and began to swoon for Kitezh.

“What the hell is happening?!” Nadia angrily said under her breath.

“Did I overdo it this time?” Kitezh asked condescendingly. “Here, you should clean up all the stuff in here.”

Kitezh handed the bucket of broken glass and ale to Nadia.

“Don’t let this get to your head,” snapped Nadia, as she slammed the bucket on the ground.

“Isn’t this part of the job? To be the sexy waitress? Those guys seem to be all over me, so mission accomplished,” said Kitezh

She got up into Nadia’s face and started poking her chest.

“Maybe you’re just jealous of me now, ohoho!” mocked Kitezh.

“Just remember that I’m still in charge of you. As long as you’re not the one managing, you’re not the one that all the guys lust over,” said Nadia, as she made her way to the back of the tavern.

SLAM!

“Hey, you’re just as cool as Frigyes told us about!” A man behind Kitezh suddenly wanted her attention.

“Well of course, I am the invisible phenomenon!”

“You know, when it gets later, Nadia puts on you know, those kind of shows in front of the guys. Are you the type to do that sort of thing?”

“Well, if you make it rain, I’d be willing to do it.”

Kitezh mainly liked the idea of having money thrown at her.

“Oh, I can’t wait to see how you and Nadia strip down and dance!” said the man. His eyes shone in excitement.

“Dancing together might be difficult, considering ho-AHK! GAHK!”

A suddenly dread shot through Kitezh. She slowly back herself behind the bar.

“Kitezh? Oh my God!” yelled the man.

A group of men started walking over to Kitezh. All eyes were looking at her in confusion.

Kitezh gripped her hand around her throat. Her face looked pale. Her eyes were wide open, and they started to well up with tears. She smacked her head against the prep table. She kept hacking up gasps of air. Kitezh was choking to death!