The First Losing Heroine

Without standing up from my chair, I gaze at her. My mood is stricken, and I don’t even know what to think of this girl right now.

She just stares back, seemingly comfortable with the silent contest. My eyes linger on her striking black short hair -asymmetrical and stylish. On her right side, her ear and eye are fully visible, while her longer left side partially covers her face, giving her a slightly mysterious, cool air. Despite the unconventional cut, it’s undeniably well-kept, the varied lengths on both sides adding to her unique charm.

She shifts slightly, and I notice her attire: a white button-up shirt under a black uniform jacket, the pistachio necktie at her collar loose, and her shirt’s top buttons undone. The combination of her sharp look and relaxed clothing choice adds to the sense of authority she seems to exude -though the flush creeping up her ears betrays her calm demeanor.

“Is this some kind of plot?” I mutter under my breath, rising to my feet and walking toward her. She steps back, still holding onto her sharp look.

“So, what’s all this about?” I ask, my voice carrying just enough frustration to show I’m not in the mood for games. Downstairs, I can hear faint murmurs of my parents’ conversation, their tones calm but unfamiliar. My mind drifts to Rana-san’s claim: It’s gonna be a long day, huh?

The girl standing in front of me closes her eyes briefly, as if steadying herself.

“Lona-nee! Why did you rush ahead?”

A cheerful voice calls out, breaking the tense atmosphere. I glance toward the doorframe and see another girl, close to my age, coming up the stairs. Her lively presence is a stark contrast to the weight hanging in the room.

She’s tall for her age, almost matching my height, and her light brown, wavy short hair bounces gently with each step. Her pistachio-green cardigan sways slightly as she walks, the neat bow tie at her collar perfectly aligned. Beneath it, her buttoned shirt peeks out, giving her a charming mix of maturity and innocence.

When she reaches the top, her face lights up with a beaming smile. Her ocean blue eyes sparkle brightly, catching the light with an almost radiant glow. "Hello! Nice to meet you again, Ask-san! Please excuse our rudeness! Let me introduce us again: I am Asano Akari, younger sister, and she is my big sister, Asano Lona. I hope we get along from here on!"

Her voice is bright, brimming with sincerity, and she punctuates her words with a polite bow. As I meet her gaze, her excitement and warmth seem almost contagious, a sharp contrast to Lona’s guarded demeanor.

What’s going on…?

—-------------------------------------------------------------------

I’ve finally graduated from middle school. My highschool debut, the moment I’ve always dreamed of, is just around the corner. Strangely, I’m now the same age as when I died in my previous life. The thought brings an odd sense of closure and a new beginning. For months, maybe even a year, I’ve felt like myself again, free from all the mental shackles of my past. And now, mathematically speaking, it’s a fact.

Walking home with my diploma in hand, I feel an odd mix of pride and anticipation. Beside me, my childhood friend -no, my best friend- Ebeil, gazes at me with an unmistakable look of pride and joy.

“Ebeil… aren’t you done staring?” I tease.

“But I’m really happy!” he exclaims.

“For?”

“For you!” he says with conviction, his scarlet eyes gleaming.

I let out a sigh, scrubbing my eyelids. “You’re impossible.”

“You’re a genius, Renyuki! I’m so proud to have you as my childhood friend. Please take care of me from now on!” he declares dramatically, pointing to himself with an overly energetic grin. “And I promise I won’t let you down either!”

His enthusiasm is infectious, and I can’t help but smile. “You really are something,” I reply, giving him a friendly slap on the back. “You’re the second-top scorer in the school, you know. Who’s the genius here?”

He sticks his tongue out slightly, a playful gesture that somehow comes off as effortlessly cool. He thinks nothing of his standing at all. That’s just how he is; laid-back, handsome, and utterly magnetic. With his striking blonde hair and crimson eyes, it’s no wonder girls are constantly swooning over him. He got ten confessions today alone, and I can’t even blame them. Honestly, he could probably become a world-class model if he wanted, but he has zero interest in such things.

“Let’s go to the arcade!” he suddenly exclaims, shifting gears.

I chuckle. “Can’t. I’ve got things to do.”

“What now?” His eyes narrow toward the light novel I’m holding. It’s a popular shoujo reverse harem of this world.

“Tomorrow. We’ll go tomorrow, okay?” I offer.

His face lights up with a beaming smile. “Perfect!” He skips ahead but then pauses, turning back. “Oh, by the way, you can’t come to my room tonight.”

“Whaaa? I was planning on it!”

“I figured, which is why I said it. You can’t. Not tonight.”

“Fine, fine. Hehe.” he laughs gently, sliping somehow a knowing smile, slightly pushing his eyelids at the same time, a gesture that can make any girl fall in love with immediately. Then he turns around and sings a melody he came up with at the moment, "Tomorrowww, we will gooo -to arcade, to play, with Rennn-yuuuki, my ally-" 

I just watch him, enjoying this genuine, wholesome sight.

—--------------------------------------------------

I crouch in the bushes behind the high school building, my notebook open in my hands. From here, I have a clear view of the side entrance where students often linger. Flipping through the pages, I stop on two sketches -one of Lona Asano, the other of Akari Asano.

My notes fill the pages, detailing everything about them: their appearances, families, and personalities. Traits of losing heroines written in neat, passionate handwriting.

It reads, Lona Asano. Short haired tomboy childhood friend. Of course, this is merely the simplest term. I glance at her sketch. I learned how to draw in early ages, just for this. It captures her sharp, confident aura, handsome, cool… and, of course, extremely beautiful that makes you leave breathless with a single glance.

She’s the kind of person girls easily admire, with her radiant kindness and casual charm she spreads. But there’s more to her, more than what’s obvious at first glance. I flip back to a few scattered notes about her insecurities, her moments of vulnerability that she hides behind that confident exterior.

And there she is. Lona arrives at the place, her usual sharp look brimming with confidence. Her posture exudes the cool, handsome yet beautiful type of tomboy that’s easy to be slave of. Even from here, I can feel the magnetic energy she gives off. But then…

“Aaaaaah!” She silently voices out, kneeling down and massaging her cheeks. I can clearly hear it behind the bushes, even able to see her completely reddened neck and ears on her snow-white skin.

“Your especially pale skin doesn’t help you save face,” I mutter, scratching my forehead lightly. How many times have you shown your maiden heart, Lona-san? I scream in my head. I’m sorry!

She breathes heavily before straightening up completely, but fumbles her steps a few times. And then I see her face. Scarlet red from her ears to her cheeks, her eyelids lowered, and her eyebrows tightly knit. One word; adorable.

“I-I can’t after all. Maybe next time…?”

“E-Extremely…” I whisper, unable to hold back. “Extremely cuuute!” I shout out finally.

Lona whirls toward the bushes immediately, her sharp yet cool and beautiful look quickly takes over her flustered expression that it’s almost scary. But the lingering redness on her face doesn’t fade, giving her an entirely different kind of charm.

I clap my hands over my mouth instantly, but she begins approaching the bushes. My heart races. I’m ready to bolt, grabbing my backup plan -a wholesome romance manga- from my bag. I flip it open, pretending to read. But then, I hear someone’s voice.

“Hey, Lona! What’s up?”

Lona freezes mid-step, her attention snapping toward the voice. A boy waves at her, approaching with an easygoing smile.

My attitude shifts instantly. I’m in my true form now, “The protection of lovely losing heroines!”

“Keisuke…,” Lona says, her voice slightly shaky. She’s trying to maintain her composure, but the flustered blush still lingers faintly.

The guy beams at her. “Wasn’t the end of the term great?” He waves toward the other students. “As always, our school really knows how to make these things special.” He scratches his head with a sheepish grin. “All those guys crying for their graduating senpais…” He laughs softly. “I might have shed a tear or two myself. Hehehe.”

Keisuke’s energy is infectious, and I can’t help but begrudgingly like him. He’s overly positive, kind, and lively -like a grounded version of Ebeil. (Sorry, Ebeil, no offense.)

But then it happens.

Lona’s voice trembles slightly as she takes a deep breath. “Keisuke, I have always loved you.”

At the exact same moment, Keisuke was also speaking, his voice overlapping hers. “You know! I’m going out with-”

Lona, for some reason… chose to continue even after hearing him talking, same goes with Keisuke.

The world around me shatters into void silence. My heart pumps wildly, heat rising to my face. Tears bubble in my eyes, slipping down my cheeks without permission. I’m not weeping or crying; it’s just… tears. My gaze locks on Lona, her face tilted downward, hiding her expression. She doesn’t tremble or give any hint of sadness. She’s still.

Keisuke stumbles over his words, his cheerfulness faltering. “I-I…” His voice is shaky. Out of pure emotionless rage, I shift my gaze to him. But what I see stops me cold. Keisuke is biting his lip, his entire body trembling. Blood wells up on his lip, and his face twists with genuine pain. My inner confusion grows, and my anger dissipates unwillingly.

He bows deeply, his voice breaking. “Lona… I always liked you too, and I’m so thankful for your feelings. But… I didn’t see you in a romantic way. To me, you’ve always been my amazing childhood friend -the one I’ve always relied on.”

Keisuke raises his head, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. I turn my attention to Lona immediately. She finally lifts her head, and I fall back onto the ground. She’s smiling. A genuine, happy smile.

Getting back to my knees, I analyze her mood. Don’t do this…

“Thank you for being honest with me, Keisuke. I liked this honest and energetic, kind nature of yours. That’s what made me fall in love with you.”

She turns to leave, pausing for a moment. “I hope the air between us won’t get hurt by this…”

“Of course not!” Keisuke responds firmly. “You will always be my dear friend. I won’t let it happen…”

Lona shows a sorrowful smile, and Keisuke’s eyelids narrow in response. She walks away, leaving him standing alone. I watch the man -the man I’m supposed to hate. The man I’ve always hated in many of the harems I’ve read and watched. But all I feel now is pity.

Is this what the world wanted? What did Rana-san want? What the evil mangaka wanted? Or what Keisuke truly wanted? I’ll never know.

All I know is this: I didn’t achieve my goal. I failed her. Though I can’t give in to despair. There are many other losing heroines who need me to stand up for them. And… I’ll show Lona-san how great she is! I’ll find someone who truly deserves her.

Clutching my notebook, I turn to leave. Keisuke remains standing behind me, unmoving, fighting in his own war.