Our Spa Will Bankrupt Everyone

“Well? What do you think?”

“It’s a long ride, but this place is amazing. No Monsters. Is that you?”

I spun, back my shiny Core. “It’s me.”

Rin toured the cave and appreciated my waters.

“I think… if you claim this place is open, we should really open you up.”

“What do you mean?”

“There are a lot of miners in our city. We bring a lot of coal to the Capital. A great portion of our men aren’t adventurers, but workhands.”

“I think I see where you’re going with this. The problem is, how will I pay for their labor…? No, leave that to me to figure out. Listen well, Rin! You have my permission to commission all the miners we need! Bring Sharlotte too! I want to hear that lazy Angel’s pitiful cries as she’s made to finally feel a good week’s work!!”

“HuuaAhhh!” The pickaxes slammed.

“Heave ho, heave ho!!”

A ravine was being cracked clear wide, and we were soon to see the bountiful sky! I used my waters to float the heaviest of boulders out of this place, taking away every bit of dust and leaving the spa sparkly clean!

“Waaah! I’m so happy you didn’t abandon mee!”

“Shut up!” I shouted at Sharlotte.

“HuuaAhhh!” All these musclebound, sweaty adventurers. Of course, they were all over the place at this hour, stomping around the cavern like walking barrels of protein. As the Guild receptionist, Rin was stuck greeting every single one of them with that prim, tight-lipped smile that barely hid the pink flush burning at her ears. She bowed, stamped their quest slips, smoothed out her uniform for the thousandth time, upholding the utmost customer service no matter how many broad shoulders and glistening arms wandered past her desk.

She never had time to date. The paperwork alone ate her evenings alive, and her mornings were gone to monster reports and incompetent newbies losing their swords in ditches.

This didn’t excuse her behavior.

Watching them work, she secretly hid huffed breaths like she was also participating in moving the rocks.

“Rin. You had a good eye for improvements. Should you want to stay here and work, say the word.”

“Is it okay?”

“Of course. Rather, work for me or else!”

“No wayyy! I wanted to go back to the Guild!”

“It’s too late for that. Right?”

“R-Right…”

“Master.”

“Don’t get it into your head.”

“Ughh, ugh. Gow did you do it, Kazuki?” Sharlotte wiped her big tears.

“Are… Are you okay, Sharlotte? Be strong…”

“My debt, how did you pay it off? How are we going to afford all this?!”

“Hahaha! It was those gemstones you were playing with before that helped me get the idea!” I explained to her. If companies got me to pre-order games as if the digital copies could run out, everything is possible~!

“HMM!” I moaned proudly. “That’s it! Having been on the receiving end, it was easy to duplicate and mold marketing to our spa! I’ll employ all the slimy tactics of Japan’s modern-day gacha-game industry! We’ll offer season passes! We’ll disseminate people’s minds from how much they’re actually spending by using our cave’s gemstones as alternate currency! We’ll exchange useful Gold for useless Gems that must be used at our spa!”

“Wow!”

“Gahaha! It won’t end there! We’ll make the exchange rate of 10 Gold for 10 Gems work for us! We’ll make a dip in my pool cost 8 Gems, so by the time they finish and love the experience, they’ll still have 2 Gems leftover! Service is paramount, but even with this, they’ll need to keep coming back! Gahaha! How marvelous!”

“Wow, amazing, Kazuki! In other words, we’ll be rich in no time! Amazing!!”

“B-Boss, you’re terrible.”

“Are you, like, an entrepreneurial genius?!”

“No, my dear Sharlotte! Only a victim. Only a victim… Sob*.”

Yes. Like a student who was bullied, I have now become the bully. Forgive me, oh kind world! This gacha-game whale has become a monster!!

“These are our earnings for this week.”

“Yahooooy!”

“We’ll need to set up a bank account or vault.”

“I’m so happy I could dance!”

We cleared the ravine, cleared a path, cleared our misunderstandings with the humans, and were fully open!