Chapter 3:

Short Stories Collection: The High Schooler that Wanted to Photograph the Ocean.

(UNFINISHED) My Thinking Story


Now I'm back to the store. It is 3:45 in the afternoon. Through the large glass window I can see some high schoolers passing by, going to their homes after the school day has finished. It is still impressive how few schoolers go to their homes. I can see how normal is to take part of after-class clubs. If I had the opportunity to be in one of those, I might have chosen to join the photography club. I love how a simple can an image be, yet depending on how it is it can deliver different messages. A monochromatic picture it is completely different than a colourful one. You know, 'a picture is worth a thousand words'. Now I remember, there is a picture of the ocean above the door. It is a little inclined so the costumer can see it. It is a little longer so anyone can observe the complete panoramic view of the ocean. I might like to stare at it for a little while. It makes me relax. It makes me forget about all my problems. It is remarkable. 

The bell rings. It points out the entrance of a costumer. This time is a female. A young female. She has a school skirt. I can predict she is an upper high schooler, third year. The school skirt is cooler cyan blue. The long skirt and the dark high socks doesn't let me see more that the middle third of her legs. It is not that I wanted to see her legs, but it is interesting, considering that they are supposed to dress a summer/spring uniform. I see she isn't wearing the school blouse. Instead, she has a complete white, short-sleeved relaxed-fit t-shirt. I wonder by she is not wearing the blouse. Maybe because it is wet? Is it uncomfortable? I won't ask about that, as I don't think it is important. Her hair seems kind of messy. Sticky. Like if she had showered with dirty water. It doesn't stink much, but I can sense a weird smell. Not bad, but not good. Behind those black glasses I can notice that her eyes are worried. That she is worried. What is she worried about? Studies? Love? The future? Or maybe the present? Her sight gives me a bad feeling. What happened with her?

   Welcome! Tell me if I can help you with something. —I say to her from the counter.

She answers with a smile. A shaky smile. Something happened with her. I won't ask. I won't ask, unless she asks for help. She goes to the book section. To the table with books stacked up. Is she here for a book? What kind of book? A study guide? We only have study guides for national tests from fifty years ago. A magazine? We only have car magazines. A novel? Unless she is into complex books, she might not find what she is looking for. I'll just grab Kokoromonogatari and continue reading it. 

   AHH! —The girl shouts.

After the shout, I hear how the books falling from the tables. It was all a mess. At the side, I saw the girl laying on the floor. She immediately looks after her bag, as something fragile were there. I approach her to assist her and pick up the books.

   Are you OK, young lady? Are you injured? —I asked her.

   Yes, I'm fine. Thanks. —She says with a relief expression, after searching her bag.

I could see a camera lens in her bag. So she is interested in photography. I won't ask about that, as I might seem like a stalker. She starts picking up the books that fell.

   Hey, don't worry about the books. I will pick them up. You can search for the book you were looking for on the other table meanwhile. —I told her.

   I'm sorry for the mess I caused. I am really sorry. —She said repeatedly.

   Don't worry! It always happens. Some costumers even complain about how we arrange the books. —I tell with a soft laugh.

She bows as apologising and goes to the next table.

   What book are you looking for? If I found it in this mess I will let you know.

   Please, don't laugh about it...

   Why should I laugh about it?

   A photography book... —She tells me with a low tone.

   Photography? That is pretty nice! I love photography, too.

I noticed how her eyes changed. Now they don't express worries. They are more relaxed. She is more relaxed. 

   Wait here, I think there are some photography books back at the storage room. Just give me a second...

I quickly look for a photograph guide. I think we have a box full of them in the storage. There are a lot of boxes on the shelves, marked with a colour and a name. Yellow means that there are summer/spring items; blue means winter/autumn; and red means various, without a specific term. Apart from that, there are others marked with green, meaning that there are fragile items, and others with black, which are books. The box I am looking for has a red and black mark, with a sticker saying 'photography'. I look at the right lower corner, the farther corner from the door.

   I found it! I'm coming back! —I shout so she could hear me.

I pull the box and take it to the counter. I grab a knife and open the box, which was sealed with tape.

   Here. There are a lot of books. What are you looking for, specifically?  —I ask.

   Panoramic and fixed shots...

   Mmm... I think I saw one book about shots in general... —I said while taking books out of the box.— Here! "Shots for You and Me". Kind of the title you would put to a novel, but it is really good when explaining how to take pictures and videos.

   Have you read it? —She asks with a soft voice

   Yeah. I had the Spanish version, but I sold it some years ago.

   Do you know how to take good pictures? 

   Well, I think I can take a good picture. Not the best, not  hundred-dollar quality, but I can do decent-quality pictures.

I grab my phone and look for some pictures I took some years ago. I scrolled down my gallery for three minutes before I could find the picture I was looking for.

   Here, look at this. —I handed my phone to her.— This is a picture of a road in Uddevalla, a small city in Sweden.

Her eyes were full of glitters. Her mouth formed a huge circle. Her ears were extended. She was amazed. My picture was nothing to be amazed, actually. I believe anyone could have taken that picture. I could have been replaced easily.

   Do you have a picture of the ocean? —She ask energetically.

   Mmm... —I searched for a little bit.— Here, this is a panoramic picture from Strandpromenaden, an old harbour in Uddevalla.

Her eyes were even brighter. Is she that much into photography? Into the ocean, maybe? I don't know. What I know is that she gives good energies to the surroundings. Now she seems much more different than when she entered the store.

   Are you interested on the ocean? —I asked out of curiosity.

   YES! —She answered with a quick and short jump.

   Well, this is actually not an ocean, it is more like a gulf or a river. But, in theory, both lead to the ocean.

   Yeah, I know. But, still, it is impressive!

   You really love the ocean, don't you? Your expression changed dramatically when we started talking about photos and the ocean.

   Uh... sorry, I haven't noticed that... —She told me with a soft tone.— But, yes, I love the ocean. And I love photos. I love taking pictures of water bodies. I know, it may sound dumb.

   No! Not at all! I find it interesting.

   Do you?

   Yeah, I mean it.

   Aren't you saying that because of empathy?

   No, I'm not. I really mean it. And, in reality, I don't have any reason to lie. I don't even know you.

   Well, that is true. It is just that most of the people... —She suddenly stoped.— Forget about it.

   Hum... Wait a second, I think there is an album somewhere.

She followed me with her sight. I am really worried right now. I know that a situation can be hard for someone if the person doesn't finish the sentence. If she suffers something like bullying or people don't believe on her that may a big problem. I would like to help her.

   Here. This is an album from an anonymous artist. I brought it with me when I arrived here and sold it to this store. —I open the album.— I believed that this album may belong to here, as someone I knew gave it to me.

When she saw the first pages, the glitters came back. 

   These pictures are beautiful. These pictures are gorgeous. I would die to take a picture like this. —She said. Just said.

   You are an unknown for me, and I am an unknown for you. Do you have any problem at school? At home? 

I asked that directly. Without doubt. Just straight. I think that if I am just going to ask something, it might be better to go to the point. 

   Mmm... —She looks down to the floor, and then nods softly.

   You can trust me. Well, you better not trust me. But this might be our only conversation. If I am going to disappear from your life, and you are going to disappear from my life, better take advantage of it and vent yourself. Just hit me with everything that you have. I will just listen. Only listen, unless you tell me to speak.

Before starting, I take some time to prepare tea, and let her some time to prepare herself. It may something serious, or it may something childish. Every person can take one problem differently. The important thing is that I hear all the story. And that she tells me all the story.

I hand the tea to her. I prepared a lavender brew. The smell of the lavender has more than a hundred fifty active components that benefits the nervous system. It is really good for relaxation. I also brought three different kinds of incense. Musk, to purify negative energies and bring energy balance; jasmine, to reduce anxiety; and sandalwood, to induce calm. There is much more mystical theory behind each type of incense, but those three are the ones I prefer when talking about complex topics. Once I lit the incenses, I gave the queue for her to start talking. 

   You can start whenever you want. Tell me as much as you want. Take it slow. This store rarely gets costumer at these hours. —I said to her.

She takes a sip. She clears her throat. And she starts talking.

   I have a dream. Not a dream. A goal. I want to take five pictures. One of each ocean. The Pacific, the Antarctic, the Indian, the Atlantic and the Artic. I am happy with only one picture of each ocean. And then I want to join the pictures. Make a kind of artificial panoramic picture of the five oceans. The World Ocean. I want to show it to the world. That is my dream, my goal. But people tell me that it is impossible. That I am never going to achieve it. That I can't live of just taking pictures. But I know it is possible, isn't it? I know I can do it. If I improve my photographic skills I will achieve it. My parents told me to better study administration or something like that to get a normal job. I don't want a normal job! —She exclaims, then she takes a sip.— I don't want a boring job. I want to do something creative. And I am putting everything that I have into this. You know, every high schooler belong to a group, don't they? Gamers go with gamers. Geeks go with geeks. Gals go with gals. Popular go with popular. I go by myself. I don't have friends. I am putting everything of myself into this!

At this point, I observe a tear flowing down through her right cheek. She is about to break. Before that, I pull some tissues and give one to her. I pour more tea, even though her cup is half way full, and make a sign for her to drink. After a couple of sips, some seconds of silence and a deep breath, she continued.

   I know that not having friends is my fault. It is my fault for focusing on photography. But, then, why they have to be like that? Why they have to bother me? Why they have to break my lens!? WHY I HAVE TO BE DROWNED IN THE TOILETS EVERY DAY!? Why am I not saved? I didn't do anything to them. Am I punished for taking pictures? Am I punished just for breathing? If so, I am better off dead. Why bother them with my existence? At the end, if I am not being supported, why to continue? Which is the point? No one believes in me. And, instead of ignoring me, they just try to sink me. They all try to make my life difficult. Why? Why me? What have I done to deserve this? I just want to photograph the oceans. That is all. I don't want friends. I don't want family. I want to stop existing. Why? Can you tell me why!? Please, tell me.

It is obvious she has all that pressure over her. She was the only one carrying it. Not her teachers, not her classmates, not her family... Her. She was. Only by herself. The good thing is that she hasn't broke yet. The good thing is that she has only deflated little by little before coming to the store. She is lucky that she came to this store. She is lucky that I escaped here. She is lucky that this store existed. She is lucky. As I promised to myself, I will help her going to the correct road. Not the good nor the best road. Just the correct one. The most viable. I give her more tissues. I am sorry for this, but I will have to be direct to her. Show her the reality. Show her the way I couldn't find in the past.

   I will tell you. No, I will guide you. But you have to promise to hear me until the end. Are we clear? You have to hear. Only hear. —I tell to her, highlighting the last two words.

She nods. I make a sign for her to take a sip. I wait some seconds and start talking.

   What I will tell you is the reality. It is a life lesson. Don't be mad at me. Well, you can be mad at me. But later. Not now. —I sigh.— To every question I make, you will answer with a yes or a no. Nothing else. Clear?

She nods.

   I don't want your nod. Are you clear? Yes or no?

   Yes... —She says with a shaky voice.

   OK. You told me you are planning to earn money with photographs. Do you have a clear public?

   No... Bu-

   I told you to answer with a yes or a no only. Do you know, at least, who can be your potential public?

   No...

   So you don't have a clear plan. OK. You won't achieve your goal without a financial plan. Some points you have to consider is how are you going to pay the travel, how are you going to pay your accommodation and how you are going to pay your basic needs. For that, you will need a constant flow of money or a big amount on savings. You are young. You are in high school. You have a lot of time.

   But I wa-

   Stop there. Do you remember what you agreed? You will only listen and answer yes or no questions, right?

   Yes...

   OK, then. I understand you want to do it right now. But, after that, what are you going to do? I recommend you to enjoy the adventure. Enjoy the misfortunes and enjoy the joys. Enjoy the process, not only the result. And for that, you will need a job. For the money. The world flows around the money, unfortunately. Right now, finish your studies. Plan a roadmap. Will you work on an area that will allow you to travel around the world? Or will you look for a work here and save a lot of money for your journey? You can even invest and get more money from your income. That is up to you. While you generate income, you can learn how to use your camera. You can even buy a better camera. Better tools, so you get better shots. You can also promote yourself, so when the time comes, you could show the World Ocean to everyone. Are we clear so far?

   Yes...

Until now, she seems a little bit more calmed. That is good. We solved the most basic problem. Now, it comes the most complex and difficult one: How should I give back all the confidence she lost? How should I tackle this problem? Should I even tackle this one? Well, I have to. I will try my best. I asked her to blow her nose and clean her tears.

   OK, then. Now, I have never been victim of physical bullying. If I tell you that I can understand you, I would be lying. So I will tell you I can't help you with that. But I cannot let those last statements go unnoticed. And I cannot because I felt the same way once. I can tell you that I know how is to live under pressure. That is why I am going to tell you the following. And pay attention. Live. Don't dare to say ever again that you want to stop existing. Try to fight back those emotions. I will tell you about something I was thinking lately. But first have some tea.

   OK... —She grabbed the cup with both hands and gave a sip.

   So... —I catch some air.— Can you think of a reason for earthworms to keep existing? I mean, can you tell why they want to keep living?

   No...

   Yes. For us there is no reason for them to live. I mean, we use them for fertilising crops. But we can't know what they think. We can't know the real reason of why they decide to keep living. Wouldn't it be better for them to already stop existing? Isn't it more painful to be used by humans and be eaten by other bugs or animals? Then, why they keep reproducing? Why they keep living? What is the point? There must be a reason. That is I want to discover. That is one of the things I want to discover. That is one of my objectives to keep living, to keep existing. If you say that you want to stop existing, then I might consider you less than a worm. For me, it might be correct to consider you less than a worm. So, keep living. You have a clear objective. Live to see it become reality. Live for it. Are we OK?

She nods.

   What have I told you about the nod?

   Yes, I understand. —She says with more confidence now.

Now I think everything is OK. I think I can already conclude our meeting. But I might give her more incentives, just in case. One more incentive.

   How much money do you have now? —I asked.

   Why do you want to know?  —She asked confused.

   Just tell me how much you have.

   Uhm... I've got... —She takes a look to her coin purse.— I have 300 yen. Why do you ask?

I go back to the storage and print two pictures: the road in Uddevalla and the watchpoint in Strandpromenaden. I go back and put them in the photo album.

   Give me 100 yen.

   Why? —She asks.

   Just give me 100 yen.

She hands me the 100 yen. I put those on my pocket and show her the last page of the photo album.

   Look here. —I point the photo album.— The last two photos are the ones I showed you before. There are six spots left: five for normal photographs and one for a panoramic one. —I close the album.— This album is now yours. Just for the price of those 100 yens and the story you told me.

   Wait, are you sure?

   Yes. Have it. I want you to have it. You already own the album. It is yours. Do whatever you want with it.

Obviously, I expect her to finish filling the album with one picture of each ocean and the panoramic of the World Ocean. But I know she will do that. That is why I just did what I did.

   Thanks... —She said with tears spread over her face.

I handed her another tissue. How many tissues did I used from the moment she came in until now? I don't know. I don't care. What I care about right know is that she is better now. She has an incentive to keep going. She is going to live. She is in the correct track now.

   Look at the time! is almost five in the afternoon. You better go home, young lady. —I told her with a smile on my face.

She looks at my eyes. She is without glasses. Now I can see her face better. She is kind of cute, actually. And now she has a smile on her face. Her eyes have glitters. She has a nice expression now. She is better now.

She opens the door, ready to leave and start a new adventure. To write a new page of her story. Before she leaves, she asks me something important she forgot to ask:

   Excuse, sir. What is your name?

   Mmm... I think I can tell you my name. Lian. Lian Garcia. First name is Lian. Last name is Garcia. What is yours?

   Saeki. Saeki Keiko. First name is Keiko. Last name is Saeki.

Keiko. "Lucky child". I hope fortune sticks with her.

   Keiko-chan, then. Be careful when returning home. I will be waiting to hear from your successes. I am here every week, this day. If you want to talk, pass by.

   Thanks, Lian-san. Thanks for everything.

She leaves the store with a beautiful expression on her face. Immediately after she left, Cho entered the store.

   Wow, that girl is pretty. And happy. —Cho said with an expression of curiosity.

   Yeah. She entered with a sad expression. Now left happy.

   What happened? —She said like if I flirted with Keiko.

   Long story short, she is a high schooler that will photograph the ocean.

   OK, then. If is that short the summary, I don't want to imagine how long the story is. Anyway, I finished for today and is time to close the store. Shall we go?

   Yep, I agree. Let's go.

I gave a last glance to the picture above the door. I knew that the picture is a representation of the World Ocean. But I don't want to break her dream. That is why I didn't tell her about it. You know, kids should dream. Adults should help the kids achieve their dreams.

And that is how the day finished. A lot has happened, but it is normal. The only thing left to do for today is relax and prepare for tomorrow.

RexxDrink
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