From Jessica

Jessica awoke to the frigid air in the early morning hours. The weather cleared up, but her clothes remain soaked, probably from leaving the window open. She took a warm shower, bundled up, and crawled into bed, sleeping for a few hours at a time. Any hours awake were spent staring at the wall, only getting up to eat some scraps when she was able. She couldn’t bring herself to do anything else.

Always doing the same basic activities, Jessica started to lose track of time. It may have only been 3 days or a week. She had no idea.

At one point, her grandmother peeked in her room to say; “If you’re dropping out of school then at least get a job.” She didn’t expect her to understand what she experienced even if it was explained to her.

She eventually gathered the strength to go out. With a heavy jacket and scarf, Jessica walked onto the sidewalk in front of the apartment. The cold has only gotten worse since then. Walking through the city, she can see many homes are decorated in red and green, some with string lights. This told her that it was December.

Jessica turns the corner at Torresdale Avenue to reach her school. There’s just one thing she needs to check. Her main motivation to leave her room. She takes a moment before passing the surrounding fence. The fear of what could be awaiting causes her to hesitate. Jessica takes a deep breath and slowly exhales. She can’t run away any longer. She continues her journey, not caring if any classes are in session.

She slowly ascends the stairs. First to the second floor where her own class was, then to the third where the clubrooms and base are located. She reads the room numbers, 301, 302, 303, 304, then at the end of the hall, her suspicion is confirmed. Room 313 has disappeared, just like—

Feeling a swell of emotions, Jessica leans her head and palms against the wall where the door once was. For over a month, the saviors gathered here before and after school. Her trusted friends. It became a part of her daily life, and now, it’s all gone.

No more Yuuki randomly popping into her room or Kahler’s ‘how did it go’ when they returned each night. She would no longer hear comments from Shayna in her rude tone nor Marquise’s passion for football. And Andres…she started to believe there was a chance they could build a life together, but even that was suddenly ripped from her.

Jessica falls onto her knees, crying the tears she was unable to before. Feeling a devastating loneliness as if her heart had been shattered in dozens of tiny pieces.

How did I get here?

She looks at her left wrist with a passion, scratching the wall as her fury grows. Figuring out the biggest difference between them was easy, making the chip embedded in her arm the only reasonable explanation.

Sure, it’s possible Michael followed her around when visiting Andres, but taking her fuzzy memory into account, she’s convinced he must have done something. Holding the sword may mask its presence, but she can’t take any chances.

Once Jessica arrives home, she grabs a knife from the kitchen and holes herself in her bathroom. Standing in front of the sink, she places a towel in her mouth to suppress any screams. Since it was implanted at birth, she isn’t sure of its exact location, but the chips are generally in the same spot.

As the knife hovers over her wrist, she begins to pant. Her hand shaking at the idea of the pain she’s about to inflict upon herself. Not once did Jessica get any cuts or bruises, with the worst injury coming from when the police tackled her when she tried to set fire to her room. What is this going to feel like?

Jessica tells herself This is nothing and finally stabs where the chip should be, wincing from the pain as blood runs down her arm and into the sink. After moving the tip of the blade around, she hits something. It definitely wasn’t a bone. She tips the knife in an attempt to lift whatever it was and then hears a ‘klink’ noise.

There in the sink is her chip, drenched in blood with bits of flesh still attached. This contains all of Jessica’s personal information and it must barely be a ½ inch long. Using the handle of the blade, she smashes down on it, with it cracking after one hit.

She wraps the wound with a towel and sits on the edge of the bathtub, holding her arm in the air to stop the bleeding. Instead of crying, she laughs. Getting louder and louder, she continues as she feels her sanity steadily disintegrate.

She reviews everything she knows; Yuuki became ageless due to the sword and made it her life-long goal to end this horrific cycle. This happens every so often. When this occurs again, will there be another ‘Kahler’ as well? Will another group of people gather to fight back? How many years until then?

Alright, Yuuki. I’ll use this sword you gave me and continue fighting against this disgusting fate.

Images of the battle against Michael flashed in her mind, ending with the moment when he thrust the sword in her direction.

And I’ll make you regret giving it back to me, Michael.

She waited patiently for 2 weeks for her wrist to heal, once again not doing much of anything. She knows she’ll need a lot of patience in the coming years.

By that time, it still hurt somewhat, but she could at least use that hand to pick up light items which was enough for her. Right before leaving, she reached under her bed for the sword. As she held it, she couldn’t help feeling resentment. It aided her in battle and saved her life, but in keeping her alive, it gave her much guilt that she’ll be carrying with her. A blessing and a curse.

Regardless, it was necessary if she was to continue fighting, and so she took it and left. She had no plans to pass the time, nor a destination in mind. The only thing she was sure of, was that the girl named ‘Jessica’ no longer exists.