Past and Future I / Promise

“…”

“Hm? Is something wrong?” Perhaps put off by my silent stare, Shina looked up from her book to acknowledge me as I entered my room.

It was one thing when she’d use it as a chair, but this was taking it a bit too far.

“Don’t you think you’re making yourself a little too much at home?”

Lying on her chest, Shina was sprawled out on my bed as if it were her own, a thick tome clutched in her hands. “It’s not my fault. You were gone forever, and it was getting uncomfortable to sit up for so long without a backrest.”

“You could’ve moved back against the wall or taken my chair or something. Do you realize how weird it is to lay down in someone else’s bed?”

“Hmph. At this point, you may as well consider it our be—” She cut herself off, her brain catching up with her mouth. “Never mind. Pretend I wasn’t about to say that.”

“Do you see now why this is embarrassing!?” To be honest, I’d gotten so used to being around Shina by now that it didn’t really bother me, but for that same reason, I was willing to give her a piece of my mind.

“It wasn’t weird until you made it weird. Now I feel all gross,” she countered.

“Bold of you to say that when the look on your face makes it obvious you couldn’t care less!”

“In the good old days, you used to be so nice and considerate. Now, you’re just mean to me. What happened to the sweet Everett I once knew?”

Shina wasn’t good at insulting people, so even I couldn’t be misled by her unconvincing performance. I doubted I’d be any better at it, but I was still intent on trying to best her.

“And you used to be all cute and bashful. Now you’ve turned into a spoiled brat, robbing innocent people of their personal space and furniture without batting an eye. Who knew you’d turn out to be such a delinquent…?”

I feigned a look of anguish to punctuate my theatrics, and that seemed to do it. Shina snorted and burst into laughter, conceding this round to me. I usually surrendered first when it came to verbal spars, so I felt a tinge of pride at this victory, embarrassing as that would be to admit.

But following that pride came a wave of regret. Did I really say all of that? Wasn’t I kind of mean, even if it was a joke? What if she actually wasn’t kidding? Maybe I’m being an asshole. What if she—

“Are you okay? You look super pale all of a sudden.” Shina sat up. “S-sorry if I was actually bothering you. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry.”

“Huh? No, it’s alright.” I let out a sigh of relief. “I was just overthinking again. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

I’m being an idiot. If I hurt her feelings, she’d tell me, and I’d make it right. That’s how friendship works. I need to get that through my head already.

The more time I spent with Shina, the more my filter wore down, whether I wanted it to or not. It was scary to think that exposing more of myself might drive her away, but…

It’s a lot of fun talking with her.

… I couldn’t bring myself to regret it.

As I regained my composure, Shina stood up, a slight blush forming on her cheeks. “Well, now that I’m thinking about it, it was pretty embarrassing to lay down on your bed, so I’m taking your chair for the time being.”

That’s also my furniture! Shouldn’t you be asking for permission instead of declaring intent!? Now that I was thinking about it, I felt too self-conscious to deliver another quip aloud, even if it wasn’t meant to be taken seriously. Instead, I nodded to accept her terms and sat down on the now-vacant bed.

As she plopped into the seat, a new topic appeared to jump into her mind. “How’s your hand doing, by the way?”

“Same as the last time you asked: perfectly fine. Magical healing does wonders. You should know that better than I do.”

“Exactly, which is how I know it isn’t always perfect. If the caster botched the spell, it could make things worse.”

“Don’t let our professors overhear how much you doubt their abilities…”

In the aftermath of our brief battle in Fordin, I received a minor injury, which was promptly mended by one of the academy’s professors versed in restoration magic. That had been over a week ago, but Shina kept asking about it.

Now settling in, she cracked open her book, flipping through countless pages until she found where she left off. Part of me wanted to give her space, but she never seemed to mind if I spoke to her while she was working. Remarkably diligent and focused, she could always get right back on track, even after a major distraction. And now that she’d reminded me of our recent encounter, there were a couple of questions I’d been meaning to ask that resurfaced in my mind.

Ah, what the hell. She would’ve gone back to her own room if she wanted peace and quiet.

“Hey, Shina. Can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“I’ve been wondering ever since the first time, but what drives these Iccasius Army people? I get what they are and what they want to do, I just don’t understand why. Won’t killing us end the world? I don’t get it.”

“Hmm. I’m not sure there’s a good answer to that question. At least, I don’t know of one,” she mused. “But it’s probably the same sorts of reasons behind any extreme ideology. Maybe some of them want the world to end for personal or religious reasons, or maybe they see the Anomaly Beasts as gods to be worshipped and Inheritors as demons to be slain. That kind of thing. We still don’t really understand what the Anomaly Beasts are or why they appear in the first place, so a person can fill in the gaps however they want. And sometimes, their interpretation doesn’t frame us as the heroes.”

“Makes sense, I guess. There were definitely fanatics like that in my world, so I shouldn’t be surprised they exist here too.”

I bet the Iccasius Army was thrilled to hear the Inheritors were beaten in their first battle against an Anomaly Beast.

…

“Hey, Shina.”

“Ask away.”

“Can you tell me about the battle you fought against Ames Nori?”

Shina’s finger, which had been gliding beneath words as she read them, froze. After a moment of hesitation, she nodded and shut the book.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“It’s okay. As an Inheritor, it’s something you should know about. Though there’s not too much to say, honestly.”

She turned to look at me before continuing. Her expression revealed a mix of pain and conviction, emotions which bled into her tone. “The complete form of Ames Nori is more or less identical to the Fragments you’ve fought, except for its size and power. It was huge—the size of a house, at least—and a single swipe of its claws or tail would easily be able to topple one. That might sound scary, and it was, but Inheritors are blessed with power precisely to rival these traits.”

It was reassuring to learn I was already familiar with how our foe operated, but knowing how this story ended sapped much of that confidence.

“The real problem was its armor,” she continued. “The scales on the Fragments are tough, but they don’t even compare to the real thing. Only Vandan and Mara had enough raw power to consistently break through them, and it could regenerate its defenses faster than we could keep them down. In other words, we could barely wound it no matter how hard we tried. Based on that fact alone, our chances of victory were virtually zero. We… we…” Shina looked like she might break down into tears at any moment.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to keep going.”

She shook her head. “No. Let me. Please. I… want to force myself to face it, too.”

I bit my lip but remained silent, acquiescing to her request.

“We weren’t a good enough team to capitalize off of each other’s efforts to make headway, and the whole thing transformed into a chaotic mess. Vandan refused to trust us and kept rushing in alone, Leon and Kerne tried their best to hold its attention, and the rest of us attacked it again and again, to no avail. Our injuries started to pile up one by one, and exhaustion was making us weaker by the second. In retrospect, it really was only a matter of time until someone was killed.”

Her eyes drifted up to the roof. I wasn’t familiar with the religions of this world, but if I were to describe it, I’d say it looked like Shina was gazing up into heaven as she spoke. “First was Alem, who Akio used to be. He took a hit for Silir and died instantly. She was in a state of shock after witnessing that, and she couldn’t react in time to save herself from its next attack. At that point, Leon ordered us to retreat. We ran and ran, while he stayed behind to hold it back and cover our escape. And that was how we lost him.”

Her explanation had grown more mechanical and detached the longer it went on. At some point, my lower lip had begun to bleed from how hard I was digging my teeth into it.

“Sorry I couldn’t go into more detail. It’s all kind of a blur now. But in the end, it turned out we harmed Ames Nori enough that it chose to flee after finishing off Leon. Then, once it was safe, we returned to retrieve the bodies. We healed them, and you were summoned. That’s the full story.”

I squeezed my lip harder in frustration. “Sorry, Shina. I’m sorry I asked.”

Yet in response, she gave me a smile, leaving me dumbfounded. “Don’t be. We failed once. We can’t take that back. But…” She balled her hands into fists. “I won’t let us fail again. I’ve been training and studying nonstop to make sure that won’t happen, and I know the others have been, too. And now that you and Akio have been here for a while, your training will also get more intense. I’ll be relying on you to have my back, Everett. If we work together, this time, we’ll do it. We’ll win for sure. For them.”

I don’t think I can believe in myself to that extent, but I believe in you. And if you’re willing to believe in me…

“You can count on me.”

“It’s a promise, then.”

“Yeah,” I swore, “a promise.”