Debriefing

Faint orange hints of lingering embers cast soft, glowing light onto the cave walls. In the darkness, his hand moved through the void and found her stomach. She was asleep beside him. Each breath caused her body to rise and fall against his palm. Feeling her, she was small, frail, soft. Yet there was a rigidity and scarred resilience to her form that was not just physical. Even as his palm held much of her waist, she felt strong. She was braver than he. Braver than anyone he had known.

Her body had tasted of vinegar, and her scent was like dampened hay with hints of honey. Feeling her breathing in sighs against his ears in the deep darkness had been one of the more pleasantly erotic experiences of Tomita’s lives, and he hoped that he had performed to a satisfactory standard. In the moment, it had seemed so, but he always had a lingering fear of theatrics in such moments so that no party would feel embarrassed.

Still, in the aftermath of passionate exploration into realms unknown, Izhari had collapsed against his chest and was soon asleep after spending a few minutes listening to his heart and his slow exhales from his mouth. Her paw was soon limp on his shoulder, and he knew she was asleep. Beyond the cave, rain began to fall, and the distant thunder pulled Tomita into the dream realm not long after.

Now, he was awake. There was no way of knowing what time it was, only that darkness had consumed the sky. Nearby pattering told him that the rain was still falling. Izhari was resting against him, no longer draped across him. She was balled against herself for warmth, with her tail curled over her weaker leg and a thin, silken shawl thrown over her body for warmth. Tomita was still fully exposed, but at that moment, he did not mind. His thoughts turned to their gear and clothes, so he slowly slid away from the resting spot and moved to the clothes that had been haphazardly left in a pile by the fire.

Thankfully, the outer garments had dried, but the inner garments were still damp due to the lack of direct exposure to the flames. Thus, Tomita laid them out fully on the ground and set out to find more firewood. His footsteps were soft and cautious as he moved back to the area where he had previously found some suitable branches. To his relief, there were a few more sticks and broken limbs that would suffice. With those in hand, Tomita returned to the fire and set about rekindling the flame. Once the crackling recommenced, Tomita moved the clothing and books closer for maximum heat.

When he was done, he looked up to see Izhari’s glowing blue eyes shining from the nearby darkness. She was still half asleep, but she was awake, listening, and facing him. Watching, in her own way.

“Sorry, I tried not to wake you. But the fire was going out,” Tomita whispered as he returned beside her and laid on the ground with a dry blanket for coverage.

“It’s okay. My hearing had to be honed to be very strong to offset my blindness. But I appreciate you doing that, and for trying to be quiet,” she whispered.

After a slow inhale, she turned to face him. His scent returned to her nostrils, and as she moved closer to him, she could once again feel the ever-so-subtle grazing of his breath against her whiskers.

“Is it… okay if I return closer to you?” she asked.

It was an honest question. In the midst of the storm of emotion raging through Ihzari’s mind, she had no understanding of what this hume felt, and what was decent or expected. Her body and very spirit seemed to be calling out to be against him, and in that moment, she could not tell if it was base natural instinct, or the rising bond she was feeling towards him that went beyond master and familiar, or a mixture of both. Those feelings faded to the back of her thoughts as she felt his palm rest on her side and against the edge of her hips.

“Here, I’ll move to you,” said Tomita as he shifted his body to be beside his manager.

Izhari’s thoughts returned to exploration and processing, and her paw slid from his chest to his chin.

“May I? I wanted to memorize the shape of your face…” she admitted.

There was a softness and femininity to her voice that was often suppressed. Tomita took note and appreciated that in that moment, she may have been feeling able to be vulnerable, so he more than willingly accepted.

“Take your time,” he replied.

Leathered ends of paw digits moved along the topography of his face in a slow, methodical process. Izhari never blinked, but her empty gaze was far away and lost in focus. Tomita found his fingers running along the fur that grew from her head, which was softer and more similar to human hair. After several moments of gentle memorization, she stopped.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

“Of course,” he replied.

“Was that… good for you? Earlier?” she asked.

Tomita smiled, grateful that she was feeling similar insecurities.

“It was wonderful. I was hoping it was good for you as well. Was it?” he asked.

“It was. It was wonderful. You felt… gentle. I’ve never felt that from another before. I’ve never received that or been allowed to receive that. Thank you.”

Her admission struck him. In the scope of the strangeness and harshness that was his life, Tomita had still been able to recall numerous examples of gentleness. Lying there now with Izarhi, he fully understood that her entire existence till now had been denied such a basic experience from another. The softness and kindness of nature may have warmed her skin in the mornings and given her pleasant scents of blooming flowers, but no other being had ever afforded her even the most common of decencies. Now, as she lay against his chest, he could feel her gratitude and soft surrender pulsing from her to him.

He wanted that moment to continue indefinitely, but the two of them knew that soon they would have to leave that cave and continue on in peril. But for now, they were safe. Beside him, Izhari was feeling the same melancholy acceptance.

“We have to continue soon…” she conceded.

“I’ll be with you,” he replied.

Izhari nodded.

“And I will keep you safe. You have become precious to me, Tomita.”

“And you to me, Izhari.”

She exhaled, and Tomita felt something warm on his chest as her tears returned for the first time in days. For the first time, these felt like tears of gratitude and relief. And they were. In her mind, Izhari was processing everything, but for the briefest moment, grief, rage, regret, fear, and sorrow gently stepped aside, and her spirit was allowed to luxuriate in the sensation of being connected to another in a positive manner. It almost overwhelmed her, and for a moment she was afraid if she focused too hard on her joy, it would slip away from her like sand between her paws. But it remained. And for that, she was grateful. It was enough to give her strength for what was ahead.

She needed to go home. She needed to experience it for herself. Maybe there would be some sort of answer as to why her life had been the way it was. Why she was cast away and abandoned. Beyond her quest to stop Him, she needed to know who she was, and she could not take this moment for granted. Tomita seemingly sensed her decision.

“Currtasi it is, then?” he asked.

“Yes. I know it will be risky, but I have to know. I have to know what happened to me, and maybe there we can find out something.”

Tomita agreed.

“It will be dangerous. Is there any chance that they know about you still?” he asked.

“Maybe.”

“Did they know you were a maji?”

“I don’t think so. My maji abilities didn’t awaken until after the world was broken. But still, I might need you to lead. I am afraid to just walk in there as myself.”

“Agreed,” said Tomita.

Izhari measured her plans and options. There was a slight inhale of acceptance, but in the face of the opportunity, she decided it was a worthy risk.

“I think I can make myself invisible to all beyond you. It takes a great bit of effort and I can only do it for part of a day at best. But I think if I consume ether beforehand, that will strengthen me enough. You will have to be our guide and pretend I am not there. We just need to figure out why you would be there…”

Tomita reflected on his relevant skills. There was still time to fully articulate a plan, but in the immediate moment, he had a proposal.

“I think I can be an auditor. Everyone is afraid of them and they ask lots of questions. So perhaps I can be an auditor on behalf of Him…”

Tomita smiled at his concept. As he laid back to return to resting, his eyes caught a glimpse of an another strange memory star falling through the distant sky. And though he was soon asleep and not aware, two small glowing orbs appeared beside them, one pink, and the other vermillion.