Rin

<Author's note: This story in its entirely is from a dream I had in February 2025. I'm taking this opportunity to actually write it down. This is the first time that I write a story, so please give a lot of advice. Many thanks for reading! ---Hitomi>

Chapter One

The Awe-Inspiring Girl (RinRin no Ko)

(“Ah, hard to imagine I would ever find someone even close to Rin...”) thought Hitomi as she wrote in her journal. Hitomi is nineteen, just starting her studies in becoming a high school physics teacher. Kind of a shopaholic, she buys way too many books for her own good, considering her tiny apartment. But buying books cannot be that bad, right? Especially since she met Rin for the first time in a bookstore.

Almost two years ago, Hitomi wanted a special gift for herself on her eighteenth birthday, and was browsing the odd section of the bookstore where titles such as Latin Grammar could be spotted, and heavily discounted, too! She was just debating whether to buy Cicero’s Speeches in Original Latin, or 150 Gregorian Chants in Medieval Notation when another girl passed by, who, upon glancing the titles in Hitomi’s hands, smiled and continued on.

By the time Hitomi snapped herself out of that enchanting smile that has been engraved into her mind, the girl’s long gone. Ugh... A perfect first encounter well wasted...

Hitomi had been debating whether she should visit the bookstore same day of the week, every week, to maybe run into that girl again, but that proved itself unnecessary. She was beyond joy when she met the same girl again at the end of the month, at a volunteering orientation. Naturally, Hitomi went to the same table as that girl did, and participated in the “Ice Breaker” activities.

Rin, 23, medical student. Loves history books on “peculiar topics”.

Turned out Hitomi would be volunteering at a different location from Rin. Hitomi would visit In-patients at a Rehabilitation Hospital, mostly seniors who fell tripping on carpet, and Rin would assist physiotherapists for family group activities promoting improved coordination for children with autism. Using this as a good excuse to express her lament that she wouldn’t be seeing much of Rin, Hitomi asked Rin for her contact to, uh... possibly share some books to read, since Hitomi surely had a sizable collection of peculiar books herself. (Latin, Greek, Finnish Gramar, Gregorian Chants, Byzantine Rites, et cetera.)

After a few meet-ups in libraries and coffee shops, Hitomi thought it was time to pursue Rin, and invited Rin to her apartment to see her collection of books. At the end, though, when Hitomi wondered if she could see Rin’s collection at Rin’s place, there was a very slight silence before Rin replied “I will tidy up my place first”.

As Rin didn’t give a precise date for seeing her books at her place, Hitomi met Rin again a few more times, and last of which was at the lake side of a very quiet park at Rin’s request.

“I was reading a very engaging book yesterday, want to hear?” Rin looked gently at Hitomi’s eyes. Thinking this as a perfect chance to bring them closer together, Hitomi eagerly nodded.

“During medieval times, some prisoners who behave too full-of-themselves would need to be ‘brushed clean’ before appearing in court again.” Rin drew closer. “Boiling water would be poured onto the skin, not too much, though, and a fine metal brush would be employed for the scouring,” Rin’s eyes became fiery and powerful. “Until the glistening white of the bone pleased the eye...”

“Hitomi, that’s the kind of peculiar history books in which I indulge. So?”

Was that disturbing? Of course it was! (thought Hitomi) ... however, when the burning eyes of Rin was mere centimeters away from her own, Hitomi’s mental debate was not whether she should fight or flight before a possibly dangerous pervert, but, hearing her own heart pounding and racing, Hitomi’s inner battle was (“could this, by chance, be indeed the reaction of meeting my first true love?!?!”)

Swallowing a couple of times before answering, Hitomi was almost paralyzed with, not fear, but nervousness, “I... I... think... I’m pretty... sure, that I... um... love you, but if that’s too soon, ... maybe it’s best to just say, I really like you. I think you are stunningly beautiful, and has a personality that makes me want to be drawn closer, while your intellect in awe-inspiring. May I please, have the permission to, um... like you a lot...” Hitomi’s voice trailed off as she stared at her shoes and wrung her fingers together.

“I am quite sure that I like you very much as well”, Rin sat relaxed, her eyes looking across the lake into the distance, “If you are not repelled by the books I read, maybe we can get along just fine. But a word of warning, though, I just broke up with my boyfriend half a year ago; we’ve been together since high school. And the reason? He said he’s not good enough for me. What’s that suppose to mean! I think I’m over him now, but if I sound bitterly harsh or feel insecure, that’s probably the reason, trying to drive people away from me before I am abandoned. Sounds like a lunatic, don’t I? But I’m quite certain I’m over it now. Don’t want to hurt you when I’m not yet ready to move forward. Wouldn’t be fair to you.”

Rin’s voice was more like a murmur by that time, and Hitomi didn’t know the right way to respond, so she leaned closer to Rin.

“Hitomi, want to come to my place and look at some books on peculiar subjects?”

“Uhn.” Hitomi nodded, and that was their first real date.

The next week, Hitomi didn’t know exactly what would be the right expression when beholding titles such as Forensics, Brazilian Jujitsu, Psychology of Domination, The Medieval Dungeon and Equipment, Suggestive Language and the Science in Hypnosis, and being unable to maintain a smile, Hitomi wondered if she would have nightmares that night.

“Hitomi?”

“Ah, ... yes?” She quickly brought herself out of the rampaging random thoughts.

“You have a very sweet voice, like glimmering sunlight on a mountain stream that flows over shiny pebbles. I would like to make you sing for me someday.” Whispered Rin as she drew close and gently held Hitomi by her shoulders.

“I... do like singing... and I guess I can see whether you like my Gregorian chant?” Hitomi thought it was a rather unpredictable change of topic.

“That’s not what I meant, though. But not for a few years, not until we’ve both finished our studies, and have made life long commitment to be officially together.” Rin chuckled lightly.

And Hitomi blushed and was rather embarrassed, thinking of the day that Rin would make her sing for Rin’s own enjoyment.

And that day never came. Fast forward two years, Hitomi and Rin both knew that something is missing in their relationship. They had fun with traveling, going to Anime conventions together, cooking, drawing and painting, but something is missing. Rin indulged herself very frequently in whispering into Hitomi’s ear, describing in graphic detail, the sensations that she would one day inflict on, and engrave into, Hitomi’s body, and watched the fear that would pour out of Hitomi’s almost hollow eyes, but something is missing.

Tomorrow will be THE day. Tomorrow Hitomi will meet Rin by the lake side in that quiet park again, and they will end it. They can still go to Anime conventions together, share books and try each other’s cooking, but there will never be the day when Rin makes Hitomi sing and takes Hitomi as her own forever.

Maybe Rin can still coax Hitomi to visit a Haunted House at an amusement park and see Hitomi cry out of fear, but no more than that.

Tomorrow will be the day. Hitomi retires herself into bed, and thinks of Rin’s fingertips on her arm, and Rin’s lips on her neck, and Rin’s whispers in her ear, and when their foreheads touched...

Hitomi, after quite a while of tossing and turning, finally drifts asleep, and has a dream that feels disorganized and illogical and... has a background of crying babies???

“Ugh, that didn’t feel like I’ve rested at all!” Hitomi muttered to herself as she opens her eyes.

“Am I still dreaming? A cavern? Why? My, I feel tired...” Hitomi looked around and saw tiny rooms dug out of the stone walls of a huge cave, with children, children everywhere (!), being care for by those seeming to be daycare staff, but in cosplay clothing(!?!?)

Hitomi tried to get out of bed, and seeing children’s shoes in front of her, she tried to push those aside with her feet so she could look for more appropriate ones for herself under the bed, and saw a child’s legs and feet move as part of her own body.

“Heh????!!!!”

“Ah, dear Kagami, you’re awake! Here’s your clean clothes for today, see you at breakfast time~” A cheerful daycare staff smiled at Hitomi as she passed by the open room.

(“Great, I’m a tiny child named Kagami now. Just. Great. Yup.” her thought went.)

Hitomi has had her fair shares of boring dreams. From Grade 7 to second year university, she has had dreams where she would go to school, work on assignments, write exams, walk home, do chores, only to wake up and redo all the aforementioned tasks in real life. Booooorrrriiing...

However, Hitomi has found one aspect for certain: she never gets to enjoy food in a dream. Her dream would end as soon as she is about to enjoy gourmet entrees. If she dreams of eating a stale dry sandwich, she would continue dreaming, but if appetizing food is about to be consumed, she wakes up without exception.

Hitomi had mixed feeling when she saw fried mushrooms, gourmet Italian sausages, fried Irish soda bread, spinach quiche, prosciutto and fine melons at breakfast time. (“Those are some of my favorites when I was traveling in Europe. Well, here comes waking up.”)

Hitomi placed some prosciutto into her mouth with a piece of melon.

“MmmHmmm! Delicious! I wonder if they also have three year aged Gouda...”

“Kagami, you say that every time you have dry cured ham.” Said the daycare staff as she served crepe to another child. “Why do you call cheese Goodah anyway?”

“Ick”, Hitomi realized that she was eating good food and not waking up, “I wonder what’s going on.”

************************************

Hi Everyone,

Here’s my first chapter. If you are from the Netherlands, please auto correct “Goodah” to “How-dah” in your mind. Yes, I know I shouldn’t use the letter H here. International Phonetic Alphabet would mean using [x]. My apologies.

Thought bubbles are quotations in brackets. I didn't want to constantly type "she thought", so that was the temporary solution.

Hitomi