He’s Just Like Me for Real!

For once, ever since I’d been isekai’d in the world of Erudios, I finally had an undisturbed, dreamless sleep, and I’d savored every moment of it… until something so bright somehow managed to flash me even in my sleep. Next thing I knew, familiar voices started growing louder near me.

“Argh, what did you do to it?!” asked Sloane.

“I-I don’t know! I just barely touched it!” said Dahlian.

“Turn it off! It’s burning my eyes! Get it away from me!”

“How do you even turn off a light crystal?!”

“Ugh, it’s so bright, I can’t see anything! Just cover it up with something!”

“Uhh, oh! I got it!”

The blinding light and noises finally settled down, but it was already too late for me. Thus ended my precious slumber.

Huh, I almost sounded like Sloane for a moment there.

“Uuugh, thus ends my precious slumber,” Sloane mumbled.

Yep, I called it.

I scrunched my face, groaned, and fluttered my eyes open to find Sloane and Dahlian slumped on a couch and breaking into a sweat. The cushion right under Dahlian also happened to glow pretty brightly. It somehow reminded me back when I tried to poorly hide my game console from my parents.

“Ugh, what’s with all that ruckus?” I grumbled, rubbing my eyes and slowly sitting up.

Sloane sighed. “Well…” He glanced at Dahlian and back at me. “I’m not good at explaining things, so I’ll let him do it,” he said, drifting back to sleep.

“Eh?! Oi! Get your lazy ass back up!” Dahlian yanked him by the scruff, but the elf had already left for dreamland. He clicked his tongue and dropped him back on the couch. “Ugh, how does this guy fall asleep so quickly?”

I scratched my head and turned to the glowing bag resting near the entrance. “So Sloane came back with the light crystals, huh?”

“Yeah, he came back a while ago. I also told him everything we’d gone through too.”

“Everything? Including the meeting with the queen?”

“Yep, everything.”

I blinked at the sleeping elf. “And? What did he say?”

“He agrees to avoid trouble with them too.”

“Really? That easily?”

Dahlian shrugged. “I mean, he hates fighting, if you already can’t tell by now.”

That’s just like him, alright. “That’s a relief then.” I glanced around the room and turned to the windows, where it framed the afternoon sky.

Wait, it was still afternoon?

I turned back to him. “Wait, Dahlian, how long was I out?”

“An entire day. Good morning, well, afternoon, by the way.”

“Huuhh?! I was out that long?!”

“Yep! You and Sloane totally slept like a log! Good thing that ring solved your floor phasing problem, yeah?”

“Oh, yeah, that’s nice and all, but Ashrenne and Lora didn’t come back yet?”

“Not yet.”

“Uh, shouldn’t we be worried? Ashrenne always checks in every morning, right? It’s already afternoon! And Lora’s still wanted by the royal guards!”

Dahlian scratched his head. “On second thought, yeah, maybe we should find them after all, but… uh, I’m only good at hunting wild animals, not people, man.”

“I’m not good at finding anything at all…”

I glanced at the sleeping elf and back at Dahlian, who mimicked me. He and I didn’t even exchange a single word, but our faces mirrored each other’s ideas.

I ever so silently stood up, walked over to the table, and scribbled a message on the back side of Ashrenne’s note. I walked back to the couch and locked eyes with Dahlian before we both turned to the sleepyhead.

We didn’t need to count down at all. We simultaneously hooked our arms with Sloane and promptly dragged him out of the couch.

“Mmrph… what?” Sloane mumbled.

“Alright, let’s go and touch some grass!” I said.

“Huh?”

“We’re off to a new adventure!” said Dahlian. “And you're coming with us!”

“Eh? Hwhuheh?” Sloane blinked at each of us before facing the entrance door that ominously drew closer, the warm sunlight behind it ready to embrace him. “Wait, no! My precious sleep!” He frantically squirmed around. “Please! Spare me! Noooooooooooo…!”

⮽⮽⮽

“I wanna go back to sleep…” Sloane muttered for the umpteenth time, stumbling and swaying around. “The sun’s way too bright…”

“C’mon, you just haven’t been out in the sunlight for a while,” said Dahlian, patting his back.

“I’m a nocturnal elf. I was never used to sunlight to begin with.”

“Well, I’m a demon, and I’m still not fully used to living with humans. I thought I would hate it, but it’s not so bad after some time, y’know?”

“Mm, good for you, then.”

“Hey, I’m just saying you’ll get used to sunlight!”

“I highly doubt it, but I appreciate the attempt to encourage me, though.”

Dahlian tossed a slight frown as Sloane walked ahead of him with his shoulders hunched and his eyes glued to the ground. He passed me a look, saying, “How’d this guy survive without sun for so long?”

I returned a casual shrug and continued walking in silence, observing Sloane’s back.

Despite not knowing much about him, his whole demeanor awfully reminded me of my old self back in Tokyo: distant, quiet, and aloof to everything around him. The way he dragged his feet and slouched his back made it look like he’d been carrying something pretty heavy on his shoulders for a long, long time, just like I did.

Aside from the fact that he might as well be one of the best assassins in Grovendale, I didn’t forget he also fought in the War of Florathea and lost his home. These were the only pieces of lore I had about him, but maybe that might be enough for me to figure him out. I could only hope there’d be an opportunity for him to open up.

Clinging onto this thought at the back of my mind, Dahlian and I idly chatted away and tried our best to make Sloane at least smile for once, but that sadly never came to pass during the trip.

Eventually, Sloane stopped before a black, wrought iron gate and said, “We’re here.”

Dahlian and I stood beside him and looked up at the entrance of a church. A pair of angel statues with bows and arrows rested right past the gate, guarding a cobblestone path with hedges leading to an open churchyard.

“Oh boy, a church, huh?” Dahlian murmured, scratching his head. “I’m not good with these places… Uh, are you absolutely sure they might be here?”

Sloane shrugged. “I sensed some traces of their presence still lingering around here.”

“So it’s our lead,” I said, scanning around. “This used to be the church of Florathea, right?”

“Yeah, Ashrenne told me this city used to worship her before she went berserk,” said Dahlian. “Now they’ve switched to worshipping the goddess of summer, Ardoris.”

“I can’t imagine how pissed Florathea would be if one of her churches switched sides.”

“Haha! Right? If I were her, I would… send my followers… to…” Dahlian blinked as a sense of dread started creeping into his voice. He widened his eyes at Sloane and me, and our minds clicked together. “To… mess up this place, and… punish the traitors… Oh no.”

“Oh no,” I repeated.

“Uhhh, you guys think those priests are doing okay?”

Sloane narrowed his eyes. “After the recent wave of lunatics attacking the authorities, I wouldn’t brush past the idea that they would raid the churches as well. Just in case, ready your weapons, you two.”

“Are you kidding me?!” I sputtered, my body trembling on impulse. “I’m still not cut out for fighting!”

“Me neither.”

“As if! You’re a bona fide assassin!”

Sloane squinted at me. “I don’t know what you think assassins are, but we’re not warriors.” He looked away, his gaze downcast. “We never confront conflict head-on. We’re weak, cowardly, and utterly pathetic…”

“Huh? Sloane…?”

He shook his head and went ahead. “Never mind me. I’m just rambling.”

Dahlian elbowed me. “We’ve already faced them before and did just fine, didn’t we? You also gotta stop lying too.”

“Huh? That’s because we had Wymond and Entrophys backing us up,” I murmured.

“No excuses, pal! Take that ring off and get ready to fight if we have to!”

Damn it, why does this world have to be based on an action RPG… I reluctantly took off my ring and drew my sword out of my head. I swallowed and gave Sloane and Dahlian a silent nod, who returned the gesture.

Sloane pushed the gate open and took the first step before we did, and once we entered, a strange gust of frigid air brushed past us. We all shuddered and looked around.

We all assumed Florathea’s followers could still be lingering around and lying in ambush, but no. There was something worse waiting for us after all.

To our horror, the angel statues’ eyes flashed red and aimed their arrows directly at us.