The Demon Lord’s Explosive Gift!

We would not stop until we had victory!

We agreed that we needed someone who could stand up to the highest standards. We needed someone who treated each dish with the respect of a butler to his master, someone like Fettuccine Alfredo, to teach all these talented students.

We risked the Demon Lord judging us disagreeably if we sent this distress call to his castle. But in gacha games, it’s best to report bugs, especially when performance is affected. And dear god, was our Spa in dire straits.

Fettuccine Alfredo was contacted. Somehow, using his charm, we hired a chef from the Demon Lord’s castle. I never could’ve expected such generosity from the Demon Lord who appeared so hard to please! In fact, I wasn’t expecting anything in return!

Though he refrained from commenting on the results of our first labor, it appears we’d proven ourselves well by gathering six amazing cooks!

As for the newcomer, many were taken in by his looks, but also his name.

He was a dashing gentleman in a tailcoat. Trails of neon lines crackled in space behind him, pointing to a possible relation to the Fairy species. He had no wings, though, ...Unless, they could be hidden under his tux.

“I am Escargot Blackwell, sir. Once but a drifting speck in the galactic deep, now, entrusted with Milord’s table... and your entire pantry.”

Half our staff fell over at the sight alone. He bowed with such elegance that even the carpets tried to straighten themselves.

“Blackwell… Top General of the Demon Lord’s army?!” gasped a startled Minotaur busboy.

“Why are you here?” A worried Human guest shrilled.

Blackwell gave a thin, razor-edged smile. “Do you suspect me of spying, good sir? If Milord wished it, I would have brought legionnaires to stand on your rooftops. The fact that I come alone is proof that this Spa is changing the world.”

That was fine by me. I cackled from my spring. “SHOW US YOUR MAD COOKING SKILLS THEN!!”

He most certainly did.

I was relaxing on top of my altar, celebrating the successes of yesterday’s feast with the new chef. Our restaurant was clattered with patrons ready to be astounded and fascinated.

“A new day begins! Now, for clanking pots and delectable smells!”

“You restocked last night, right, sir?”

“The test supply from yesterday was small, but we have a massive pantry; feel free to use it. It follows all regulations, it’s even ice-cooled with Abilities! The raw ingredients will surely be great for at least five weeks.”

“Ah, that? I was certain that was for me.”

“What are you getting at?” I watched as Escargot Blackwell, the world’s most handsome Fairy butler, began to slowly unbutton his immaculate white shirt.

“I devoured your pantry,” Blackwell said matter-of-factly. “It was an invitation gift, was it not?”

“You ATE it all?! You couldn’t have! Not in a single day! Hold it, stop what you’re doing! This isn’t that kind of Spa!! Aren’t you a Fairy?! HU!!” I inhaled sharply.

With a final flick, his shirt stripped open.

Where there should’ve been rock-hard abbs, there were hard-rock abbs! But also, a swirling black hole!!

He didn’t have a normal internal digestive system, but instead, a galactically powerful one!

Why was it whirling so hungrily? It couldn’t be that we were given an amazing chef and butler, only for him to be a good-for-nothing glutton?!

“You invite trouble if you get involved with Milord so easily.” He tilted his head politely. “I was a small black hole before Milord granted me this form. Now, I maintain it. If I do not feed by midnight daily… the void hungers.”

“Hungers?”

“Boom.”

A Goblin bouncer hurled the remains of a turkey leg to knock him out. It orbited twice before vanishing with a slurp into his chest.

“[Water Sphere Level 100]! EVERYONE, STAND BACK!!”

“HE’S A RAID BOSS!!” someone screamed from the crowd.

“HE’S RESETTING THIS SPA INTO A DUNGEON!!” another cried.

My waters sealed myself off with the butler in a giant hemi-sphere.

“Kazuki!”

“Master!”

They called from over the dome’s roaring waves, frantic to know what was wrong.

“It’s okay! Just some sudden office hours! I gotta discipline our new worker and teach him how we run things!!”

“No way…”

“Not like that, Rin!”

“Stay safe!!”

“This weak hemi-water-sphere will do nothing to stop my blast radius. Do you intend to test it?”

This damned Blackhole Bulter!

“Do you understand, Sir Kazuki? I am here as Milord’s eyes, but also as Milord’s mega-bomb if you ever fail to live up to the glorified expectations you have presented to our castle. If this spa ever loses business, you won’t be able to afford to feed me. That will spell the end for everyone here, all the way to the edges of town.”

“You– You suicidal freak! Do you have any idea how terribly our Spa’s ratings will plummet if the new handsome chef dies?! Live on! I will help you live on!”

“I shall, Sir Kazuki. If I ever explode, I’ll absorb everything and become larger. I quite enjoy living.”

“Huh huhuuhuuahh!” I hyperventilated. “You can live with that, but I can’t! Who knows what’ll happen if my Dungeon Core gets absorbed?! A challenge? A challenge, certainly as part of our first labor?! And you’ll live on?! Great to hear! We don’t have food today, but will drinks at the izakaya do?”

“That would work wonderfully. I beg that you forgive if I display an inebriated state today.”

“We were challenging my chef clients the other day. Seeing them so happy during the event reminded me once again of how much our clients love this place. The Demon Lord intends to test our spa, our heaven?! I invite this challenge fully! I’ll take on the Demon Lord’s challenge!”

“I was expecting more pushback. Very well. It pleases me to reach a fruitful accord. Milord will certainly be pleased to hear this as well. Truly, you’re as kind as everyone says– Gurgle* Gurgle*!!”

“[Holy Geyser Level 50]! [Healing Flow Level 50!] Gahahaha! You must accept nutrients into your endless stomach, you say? Have more to wash down the food from the pantry! Fill! Fill yourself up with my waters!! You really are a bottomless drain, handsome chef of mine!”

Yes! Satisfying his palate was secondary!

The only thing I needed to keep our chef from exploding was to feed him the most desperate of desperate NEET diets!!

“It’s okay! I’ll add the occasional ice cube for crunchy texture! Gahahahaha!”

I released him and retracted my healing waters. He plopped onto the tiles, his gluttony fully exhausted for the moment.

“Wonderful! How wonderful! You must remain as my chef! You have produced fantastic results. I forgive the pantry mishap! If you keep it up, I’ll be right on my way to adding a personal food storeroom for you. Come on, what do you say, Blackhole Butler, new friend of mine?!”

“Burp*… yea, yes.”

“No way! Kazuki! Rin’s right! You really do swing that way, too!”

“Nooo!!”

“So, you’ll stay as our master chef?” Sharlotte asked, ready to delegate as much work as she possibly could.

Blackwell Escargot straightened himself from his top-down, bottom-up pose. “Prodigies are not rare, Sharlotte. The world crawls with them. The Demon Lord has dozens at his table. The Capital breeds them by the handful. There will always be prodigies in your opponent’s realm, and your business needs to be attractive enough to absorb them. You’ve gathered some talent, yes. But talent is not enough. What matters is whether your business is dazzling enough to lure them in, disciplined enough to keep them here, cultivating enough to turn normal into expert.”

My steam rippled nervously. “What is it, getting all bureaucratic all of the sudden?”

“It’s about the results of your first labor. In a sense, I was a gift,” Blackwell continued smoothly. “A prodigy offered to you by the Demon Lord himself. Do not assume your rivals will be so generous. They will hoard theirs. They will sharpen theirs. And you…” His eyes narrowed. “…you failed your first labor.”

The courtyard went silent, the weight of his words sinking like stones into my waters.

“In this case, what your cook-off trial represented was a chance to attract multispecies efforts, as well as these prodigies. And while you have, you needed a master prodigy to guide them. In this respect, you failed… This is what the Demon Lord will likely determine through my eyes. But I do not think this is the reason he failed you. Such a ruling tis’ too harsh. Your way of handling issues is certainly unique. Being the owner of a business conglomerate is not so different from running the household right under Milord. How to task jobs to people. How to make sure these people are satisfied while you stay in the seat of principality. You pass in these regards, but only if this were a single species Spa. Not with the way things are between the three of our species. News came to our chambers that a three-way fight between interspecies broke out.”

“You knew!?”

“The Demond Lord feigns his true wisdom. Nothing leaves his eyes. Especially when those matters concern his son. It is quite noble that you singled me out to protect your clients. I find it amazing that people respect you, and even fear your powers. But at the end of the day, you’re still a young business owner. With the stature you claim to have, such a role of handling the threat I presented should be delegated to your Orc bodyguards. Delegation, even if it may seem slothful, must be smart. From cook to bodyguard, delegation to priorities is the reason why a true Lord never has to leave their throne.”

‘You aren’t good enough’… wasn’t what he was saying. Through the judgment of the Demond Lord, Escargot Blackwell was saying ‘You can be good enough.’

“Do I have room for growth?”

“The Demon Lord has offered you the best of the three labors.”

“What do you mean? We failed, but there’s a chance for redemption? Tell it to me straight.”

“Did Milord not talk about the full extent of your first trial? That’s very like him. What I mean is that it also examined your ability to handle high stakes produced by the will of the people. In this case, handling issues presented at your Spa by your clients, from unexpected brawls to the demand for better facilities. I would personally score you in a neutral regard, but these times are not so forgiving for you to fail your first trial. You have no other choice but to pass your second and third labors if you ever want your human body back. For now, I shall walk with you, Sir Kazuki Suzu.”

“I’ll trust you to keep from blowing up.”

“You're earnest with others and yourself. I don’t dislike that, Sir Kazuki. As you come to learn of your weakness, you'll grow to be stronger than ever before.”

“It’s not just me, we’re all always bettering ourselves! Alright, Escargot Blackwell! Keep to your station at the new kitchen and work to perfect my six champions!”

“As you command. Also, one last thing before I begin. The Demon Lord is quite fickle and normally refrains from revealing his cards. Therefore, we won’t truly know if we passed this first labor or not. Even if we continue to endeavor in a second labor, and then a third, he may just be playing with us in the palm of his hand. That’s just the way he is.”

“I guess that confirms Fettuccine Alfredo’s previous statement about his Master being an asshole.”

“What?”

“That’s okay. We don’t stand to lose anything major, and neither does he. In fact, as a Spa, we are meant to entertain our clients.”

“I feel like you said something incredible.”

“I am. Even if we fail all three labors, I want to see him begging to come to dip in our pools.”

“You very well may. The same as how I appeared, if you can keep making him look your way, I’m sure he will eventually fall in love with this place too.”