27 — Joezand's Trip

The stone capital is left behind, as the hard gray gives way to a lush green. The deep foliage could be seen via the single window in the carriage, the bushes and trees creating a beautiful scenery. The road below them was purely dirt, but it still had handy signs on the side of it every once in a while.

"So, about Kivul..." Joezand says. "How are the people there?"

"Haven't you said that you read about it?" Agnes questions. "The people are backwards and stupid. What else did you expect from a village in the middle of nowhere?" She leans in. "How did you even get interested in Kivul in the first place? I can't imagine the village is described much besides being on the border and barely livable."

"Why did you come again?" Joezand sighs. "Don't you have your own duchy to run? Is bothering me that important to you?"

"Because the Empress knows my useless loser brother would probably get himself killed, so she sent the smartest person in the royal family to take care of the dumbest!" She smirks at him. "By the way, when I say my useless loser brother and the dumbest, I mean you. Not Florian, although he is the second dumbest. Just making sure your small brain can comprehend."

"You only have two—" He stops himself. "Yeah, yeah, whatever." He sighs. It's going to be a long trip. He turns to Iaomai and Anneliese, who are rather quiet. "So, I imagine there are some other villages and cities on the way, right? Are we stopping by those?"

"Whenever possible." Anneliese says. "But we're taking the shortest route, so they're few and far between."

"Why are we doing that, again? It can take longer if it makes our life easier."

"Because I requested it." Agnes says. "Unlike you, I actually have responsibilities. So I made sure we go there and back as quickly as possible."

"Oh, shut it." He grumbles. "What if we need to rest and restock?"

"We could take turns sleeping here on the carriage." Anneliese says. "I also brought blankets and such."

"Or we could go camping if needed." Iaomai says. "And I can forage for food. Being a devotee of Turken, I have quite the green thumb."

"Turken?" Joezand asks. He remembers Lorelai saying the name. "That's one of the gods, right?"

"That's right. Turken is the god of nature and animals. He's also the creator of both animals and mistals, so his opinion of humanity is... quite poor."

"I see. I don't know much about the gods, with the exception of Sunnaria. Ever since I lost my memories, at least." Joezand replies. "I've heard about Agnes talking about mistals, but I'm not sure what they are either."

"Oh my god, you're so gross. Stop listening in when other people are talking." Agnes rolls her eyes. "Mistals are big, brutish, dumb, disgusting, stinky mutts. Way back when, we had way bigger beasts and animals. Some of them non-consensually assaulted human women and gave birth to the abominations we call the mistal. I personally think a mercy kill would do them good, but they're too useful for that. So we keep them as slaves instead."

"That's a bit of a rough description." Iaomai scratches his neck awkwardly. "But they're half man, half beast. Those are the mistal."

"A bit rough? It's completely ridiculous and inhumane, that's what it is." Joezand says, turning to Agnes. "You talk like they're at fault for these beasts having done that. What's wrong with you? They have consciousness, don't them?"

"Oh please, you can barely call it a consciousness." Agnes says. "Some masters tried to make mistals learn language, or math, or anything, but their brains are so slow that they'd probably take ten years to memorize the alphabet."

"Yeah, and I'm sure that the abuse they suffer have nothing to do with that, right?" Joezand rolls his eyes. "I knew you were an annoying twat, I didn't realize you're an actual monster."

"Go and cry about it, then." Agnes says. "I'm a businesswoman. I find no pleasure in suffering, only money. If nobody wanted to buy them, I would certainly outlaw them to get some more support from the pansy humanitarians in my duchy. Blame the masters, not me." She says with a chuckle. She starts to scratch her chin for a bit, before looking to her butler with a smile on her face. "By the by, Iaomai! Since my idiot brother doesn't know anything, so could you enlighten him on changelings? Those might sneak up on him someday, after all!" She looks directly at Joezand with a haughty look on her face.

"What does that have to do with what we're talking about?" Joezand asks.

"Let Iaomai speak, puh-lease!"

"O-Of course, Duchess Agnes." Iaomai starts. Even he seems to be getting uncomfortable with how she is. Which is weird, because he should be the one most used to her. Is this... not her normal? "Changelings are beings created by Schaffa, one of the worst of all demons." He quickly thinks if that's the demon he's going to fight, but remembers no one else is in his brain to answer him. Bummer. He really misses Sunnaria. "She's long since disappeared, but the changelings remained." Oh, that's better to hear. "They're invasive and deceptive, being able to mimic a human near-perfectly. There are some blind spots that every changeling lacks, but it seems to be different from person to person."

"Hmm, interesting." Agnes says. "I wonder if someone changed all of a sudden that would imply they're not the same anymore, huh?" She looks directly at Joezand.

"Is that..." Anneliese says, clenching her fists. "Is that what you think is happening here?" She exclaims. "Joezand's kindness is still the same. Even if he changed, I can still tell you he's the same person inside."

"Oh, you poor, poor little maid. The true Joezand is probably dead in a ditch, uselessly rotting and growing mold, while this monster took his place." Agnes says with a smile. "Oh, such a tragedy! The blind spot of this changeling is most obvious! He forgot to make the useless prince useless!" She says in a theatrical manner. "Anyway, I vote to kill him and go back to the comfy palace. Anybody in?"

He can't tell if she's serious or not.

But still...

"Ha. Ha! Hahahahahahahahaha!"

He laughs.

"Really? That's your big deduction?" Joezand says between chuckles. "I didn't think you were so unimaginative that you can't even fathom people changing. It must be the scary monster that took my place!" He continues. "Hahahahaha, is that it? And here I thought you were smart!"

"What? Y-You..." Agnes says, the smile from her face vanishing. "I AM smart, you little prick! Who do you think you are to tell me I'm not? I bet you never even finished a single book!"

"Hahaha, oh, man. That's hilarious." Joezand says, wiping his eyes. "Yeah, sure. That's what's going on. You figured it out!" He mocks her, as she gets red in the face. Is that really what makes her embarrassed?

"S-Shut up!" Agnes exclaims. "I-It's a valid theory! People don't change out of nowhere!"

"You haven't seen me in how long again? Assuming it's out of nowhere is so unscientific." He says. "People don't stop in time when you can't see them, you know?"

"B-But everyone said it was out of nowhere! Agatha, Thaddius, even Cecilia!"

"Biased words from people who didn't really believe I could change in the first place." He waves away her words. "Most of the work is internal. People don't see it until the results start rolling in." He looks at her, raising an eyebrow. "And why were you so antagonistic if you thought I was a changeling? Shouldn't you be happy about it?"

"Happy?!" Agnes says, offended. "Why would I be happy?"

"You hate Joezand." Joezand replies. "You hate your stupid, useless, good for nothing brother. And then comes a version of him that is, in your words, 'not useless.' Why do you care at all, then?" He leans back into his seat, putting his hands behind his head as he smirks. "Or... Oh, no! Do you actually care about your brother? The moron that can't do anything right?" He mocks, and she grows even redder.

"T-That's not... Ugh..." Agnes groans. "W-Whatever! You're stupid, anyways."

"Not able to argue back?!" He says. "Gee, where's the Agnes I knew? She always had a way of talking back! Maybe you're a changeling too." He chuckles again. "Pfft, hahaha. Changeling."

"Ugh, shut up already!" She crosses her arms and pouts. "Moron..." She murmurs.

He does decide to stop there.

It's not a bad theory at all. It is, in fact, very plausible.

What, is she going to think that he came from another world? That's stupid.

Still, he found Agnes' weak point. And he didn't even have to go for a low blow.

He looks at Anneliese, and she's looking at him with a glint in her eyes. Her eyes quickly look away, while a blush coats her face. She really likes when he stands up for himself, huh? Seems like the previous Joezand didn't do that a whole lot.

Which makes him feel kind of bad. The previous Joezand went through all this abuse daily, and just... Took it? No wonder he ran away.

He shakes his head, dispersing his thoughts. It's better to enjoy the moment of peace and quiet that he built as the carriage leads them all towards their destination.