Hello, My Name Is...

I walk to the edge of town to the address written on the flyer. I suppose “address” is a loose term here. There’s maybe twenty small buildings and cottages in the area each marked with a name or number. I need to head out to the building furthest from the town center to the east. Coming across the end of the trail, I see a post with a crudely etched title in the wood grain. This is the Isekai House.

What lies before me is a cute little cabin complete with a wishing well and a beautiful forest backdrop. Something like this would normally be out of a fairytale, but I really miss home right now. And the book club. And potato chips. God I miss potato chips.

I’m still unsure if I even believe this is truly happening to me. The whole getting sucked into a fantasy world, of one of my favorite books no less, seems far-fetched enough, but the fact that I’m not the only one getting transported here? Does this mean that the world back home is suffering from a supernatural other world summoning crisis?? Or to the rest of the world, are we all just missing person cases?

I pause at the entrance to the Isekai House. This is really bothering me thinking about what Earth could be going through while we’re gone. Unless by gone… wait, could I be GONE gone? Is this some twisted version of the afterlife? Did I DIE in my sleep?! Oh God. If I’m dead then my mom is going to kill me. Maybe these people can help me get back to the real world? At the very least, I have to try.

I slowly open the door to the cabin. One loud creak and the interior reveals an odd collection of characters. A bunch of different fantasy species are gathered in a circle in the middle of the room. Elves, gnomes, orcs, and dwarves all chat amongst themselves. In fact, humans seem to be the most rare among this group! Some of them are resting on the floor while others are sitting in hastily assembled wooden chairs. All of them are now staring at me intensely.

“Uh hi…” I mutter the words barely coming out of my mouth.

These small words light a spark of excitement with some elves and gnomes chattering about my presence while others don’t seem too pleased. A particularly salty sulker leans against a wall in the corner of the room. When I look back to make eye contact with him, he turns away. I recognize that wardrobe though, it’s the mysterious cloaked figure from before! Wait, and did he blush? Turns out he’s rather shy for a broody little rogue. And low-key kinda cute? I can’t think like that though. When I get out of here I’ll probably never see these people again. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

I look up. I must have been hitting my hand against my head a couple times while thinking that because everyone is staring at me now. Great, I just met these guys and I’m already the weirdo.

“Are you okay, miss?” A polite gnome woman asks.

Oh this is embarrassing. Think of a good excuse while you can!

“Yeah, I’m alright… I just miss home is all…” I say lying through my teeth.

“Oh dear we all do..” the sweet gnome cooed. “But that is why we are here in this house. This is a way for us to come together and know that we are not alone. My name is Minerva and I host a gathering twice a month just for us real world folk. Alright, so since we have a new member let’s all introduce ourselves. Who would like to go first?”

“Alright I’ll start.” A bold hand reaches up. “Hi everyone, my name is Maddie and I’m an isekai.”

“Hi Maddie…” The whole group chimes in unison, some with more enthusiasm than others. I forgot that a lot of support groups did that call and response thing. It feels a little weird at first, but I guess it helps keep everyone engaged.

I raise my hand and speak. “I think I know the answer to this, but what’s an isekai? It’s pretty popular in manga now right?” My book club typically doesn’t read much manga, but before you raise your pitchforks and torches, it’s not that we consider them “below us”. Almost all of us just prefer novels instead and that typically does not include isekai. At least I don’t think it does... Wait, did I pronounce that right?

An older gentleman dwarf pushes up his spectacles and informs me. “An isekai is a genre in manga where the main character gets transported to another world. Usually it’s into an RPG or fantasy realm like this one!”

“So when we refer to people who came to us from the real world, the one that we call home, we refer to those people as isekais. And that’s why this group is the Isekais Anonymous. Anywho, let’s continue. Maddie dear?”

I didn’t even realize I interrupted her. Oops.

“I got isekai’d here about three years ago I think? It all happened when I fell asleep over a textbook. Anyways I’m a wizard in training so if you need anything just let me know!”

Just after listening to her talk, I had another question pop into my head. I raise my hand instinctually. I feel bad for doing this, but I have so much to ask! “Question.”

“Yes?”

“So is that how people come to this world? Cause I was also reading a book when I got ‘isekai'd’ here.”

“Not always, a common theme here is vehicular manslaughter I'm afraid.” Minerva says with resignation.

That’s an odd thing for a sweet little old gnome lady to say so plainly. Hearing the term vehicular manslaughter come out of that mouth was not something I had on my bingo card, but neither was getting isekai’d into my favorite book series. Seems like she isn’t wrong though; one by one the others start talking about their arrivals.

“Many people here were hit by a truck.”

“Ice cream truck.”

“Pickup truck.”

“Tractor.”

What? How the hell does someone get hit by a tractor?! They move so slow!

“But that's not always how people come here…”

An unfamiliar voice trails off from the shadows. The room grows cold as a girl with fluffy cat ears and a dangerous grin starts talking from the opposite corner. She walks closer to the center of the circle as she talks. “The man named Jet over there got knocked unconscious at work, another guy stepped into a not so convenient convenience store, and me? Why I nearly drowned. Zero out of ten experience would not recommend.”

“Stop trying to scare her Azuki.” the wizard girl Maddie retorts.

“What?! She asked…” The lady with the cat ears crosses her arms and sticks her nose to the air indignantly. I don’t know why, but I get the feeling that this girl is trouble. “Anyways, you should thank your lucky stars you probably look the same as you used to. It sure took me a long time to get used to this body...”

She’s got a point. There’s a wide array of magical fantasy creatures here. Gnomes, orcs, elves, dwarves, cat people, but me? I still look like a human. Just plain ol’ June. I suppose that is for the best though. God, I stand out like a pigeon in a flock of swans.

Minerva chimes in clearly in attempts to try lightening the mood. “So dear, would you like to tell us about yourself?”

I look around the room to see who she may be making eye contact with. There’s no one behind me she’s talking to. Oh no, her gaze is fixed on me. Oh come on! I hate ice breakers in class.

“What me? You don’t want to hear my boring story…”

The whole room turns, looking at me with expectant eyes. Turns out they do want to hear my boring tale. I’m not sure what to say though. I really don’t want to talk, but they’re all staring at me. Well, here goes nothing.

“Alright, fine. Hi… I’m June…”

“Hi June!”

Oh God, it’s going to take me a while to get used to that. This time everyone said it in almost perfect unison. That kinda creeped me out. Anyways, keep going. Keep it brief.

“I got isekai’d here yesterday? I fell asleep rereading Emperor of the Lantern and poof now I’m here in the book world.”

“Oh my that’s quite a lucky coincidence! Not everyone here has read those books or watched the movies, save for our expert Spector, so you have a leg up on us with knowledge on this place. We may need to come to you for advice!”

Please don’t.

“Oh and if you don’t mind me asking, it’s a tough question, but what is something you really miss from back home?” The polite gnome lady leading the group asks. That’s such a difficult question to ask right out the gate and everyone is looking at me expectantly.

“Uh I’m not really sure.”

“It can be anything dear. Big or small!”

“I uh… I guess I miss…” come on June, think! And don’t say something stupid!

“Uh… potato chips?”

Everyone stares at me with blank expressions. Crap. Was that a bad answer? Oh of course it was! People who got this question probably answered with something sweet like missing their family or their job, but I said potato chips?? What is wrong with me?!

“...that’s a good one.”

What?

“Yeah I miss potato chips!.”

“I could kill for some BBQ flavored chips!”

Then one by one the room filled with people expressing their salty, starchy desires. I guess it wasn’t such a stupid answer after all! Well wait till they hear this, it will blow their minds!

“Right?! Oh and my local 8-Twelve store has these really good froyo machines. I sometimes dip my chips into a vanilla cup!”

Op- the room got quiet again. Was that too weird?

“...YEAH!!”

A lizard man expresses his agreement with so much enthusiasm. I don’t know who that guy is, but I like him! I never expected to meet a like-minded goofball here who can keep a conversation going with so much fervor. Nor did I ever expect to meet a scaly friend whose eyes move independently from each other. I don’t know which one to look at, but I don’t care!

Eventually everyone begins to chat excitedly about their favorite foods, appliances, and miscellaneous things they’ll miss from back home. We talked about toasters, hot dogs, carnivals, movie theaters, and more. I never realized how much of this stuff I took for granted and it felt so nice to talk about it with other people. It almost felt like I was back with my book club friends from the real world.

Alas, with my luck, all the good merriment had to come to an end. Just as things were beginning to feel light-hearted and happy, a massive tremor shook the building. A giant claw picks up a section of the thatching allowing parts of the roof to start falling down to us below. Oh, did I mention this claw was attached to an enormous green dragon?!

“Oh so rude! I swear dragons here just don’t know their manners.” Minerva the gnome calmly expressed her sentiments while a fricking dragon tore off the top of the building!!

“Alright everyone, so before the fight begins, let’s recite the isekai decree shall we?”

I may not be home and that’s okay

I’ll do my best while I stay

To work on me so that I may grow

So I can learn to be a hero

…I want to go home.