Cringe from the dumpster

A video cassette tape was dropped into a dumpster. A few days later, some dumb college students fished it out. Upon returning to the dorm, the students watched their prize on the TV. Little did they know just how cringe it would be. 

...

“G’day mates! I bet you’re gathered to hear my tale and research. I’m Drop Bear Dumbee! Australialand’s number one zoologist!”

*Note: This man has no zoology degree or license. He is just some wacko that runs around in the Outback*

“For years, I’ve always wanted to know one thing regarding Australialand Wildlife; why is the Yowie, called the Yowie? Ya see, I’ve always wondered why it was called the Yowie. Sure, some call it the Yahoo, but it’s always been the Yowie for me. Then I found a breakthrough! In Japan, yaoi means boys love. Then it all clicked. The Yowie, must be into yaoi... Roll the intro!”

The camera panned over to a shirtless man drumming on glass bottles before panning back to Dumbee, who began to sing and dance. "In the Wild outback, heard ya gotta pack, cuz everything's out to kill ya, mate. Bring a didgeridoo, and a coconut too, and boomerang, boomerang, rang, rang, rang, rang. Do a kangaroo hop, like a breaking Raygun, yaoi kiss a capybara in a dingo pack. Eat your eucalyptus leaves and watch the crocs, cuz DBD's in a land down under! Da,da,da,da,da,da, DOWN UNDER! Crikey mates! I smell a barbie! Might be a yaoi yowie cooking capybara meat. Tornado like a tazzy devil n' kangaroo box, drop kick like a drop bear on Ares rock, and bite like a spider from a skull in a hole. Cuz DBD's in a land down under! Da,da,da,da,da,da, DOWN UNDER!"

Had those that decided to watch this movie not sworn an unbreakable vow that they'd all watch this masterpiece to it's end, they'd have scrambled to turn off the TV in that instant.

"Welcome back, mates! Today, I found me..."

...

BZZT!

“That was the dumbest shit I’ve ever watched,” a good-looking young man  growled after the video ended.

"Cringier than Cringe over here," another jibbed as he pointed towards a fat bespectacled young man with long scrawny arms and a hideous bowlcut.

"The occults would love it. I'll deliver this to them," a purple-haired girl smiled.

"Do not torment our eyes and ears with that cringe," Cringe sneered as he ferociously typed on his computer.

"You're one to talk, you flamewarring incel," a beautiful girl with long black hair scoffed. 

"Guess I'll throw this back in the trash and burn it. The world doesn't deserve to be tormented by this," the good-looking young man grumbled as he got up and walked towards the TV.

"I don't think it was THAT bad," the purple-haired girl pouted. 

"Save it, Petunia. Roux's right. That shit's gotta go," the black-haired girl huffed as she flicked her hair.