Troubled pasts' [1]

“Take care of yourself, okay kiddo.” 

A woman said as the train approached, its light and sound were like a peaceful warning in the distance. 

“Right, thank you again… Aunt-Emily.”

Keith said with a kind smile, a radiant smile, a joyful smile, but little did he know that she wasn't fooled by his grin, she could see right through it, she had lived with him for far too long to be fooled so easily.

She punched him gently on the head, trying to snap him out of his delusion of thinking he had deceived her, then she frowned.

“Listen you idiot… don't smile like that… it doesn't fool me at all.” 

She said as she moved her hand from his head. He turned down the smile and looked at her for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts, and then finally he spoke, his voice awkward as it cracked, his expression a little emotionless as his smile reappeared, it was like it had a busted switch.

“Hehe… was I really… that obvious?” He asked casually while laughing awkwardly.

Her gaze clung to him, a poignant mixture of sorrow and longing etched on her face. Her brows knotted, and her eyes brimmed with unshed tears, the corners reddening as she struggled to hold back her emotions. 

The pain of parting seemed to seep into her very being, her heart aching with a dull throb that echoed through her chest. 

She felt like she was leaving a part of herself behind, abandoning the young boy who had become her reason for living. The weight of her decision hung heavy in the air, a palpable tension that threatened to suffocate her. 

She knew she had to choose between staying with him, trapped in a life of uncertainty, or leaving to forge a new path, one that would ensure their survival. The choice was clear, yet the thought of separating from him felt like a knife to her heart.

“Keith, I'm sorry it has to be this way but I—”

Emily's apology was interrupted, her words faltering as Keith cut in, his eyes locking onto hers with a resolute grin. 

"It's okay, I know why you're leaving," he said, his voice laced with a determination to reassure her. "You don't have to explain. You've done so much for me already." His words were a gentle rebuke, a reminder that she had sacrificed enough.

As he spoke, his smile seemed to falter for a moment, a flicker of vulnerability flashing across his face. But he recovered quickly, his expression smoothing out into a mask of calm. 

"Please don't worry about me – I'll be fine." 

The words felt hollow, a fragile reassurance that threatened to shatter at any moment.

The silence that followed was oppressive, the weight of their impending separation settling over them like a shroud. 

Keith's eyes held a deep sadness, a knowledge that he would soon be alone, left to navigate the world without the one person who had ever truly understood him.

Emily's steps were gentle, almost reverent, as she closed the distance between them. 

Her arms enveloped him, holding him tightly as the tears she'd been fighting finally broke free. They streamed down her face, a bittersweet symphony of sorrow and love. 

The warmth of her body seeped into his, a comforting presence that seemed to anchor him. 

He was taken aback by the intensity of her emotions, the raw pain that radiated from her like a palpable force.

At first, he felt a pang of guilt, as if he were the cause of her distress. But as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close, he began to feel the weight of her sorrow settle onto him.

His mask of calm began to slip, his face trembling as he struggled to contain his emotions. 

The sound of her quiet sobs was like a crack in the dam, and suddenly his own tears fell, pure and clear. 

They streamed down his face, a cathartic release that left him feeling raw and vulnerable. 

In that moment, Emily's tears became his own, and he let go of the need to be strong.

He allowed himself to feel the pain of their impending separation, and the tears fell, a healing balm to his soul.

“I-I’m sorry for making you sad… I… I'm so stupid… I've been… nothing but a burden to you…” He said uncontrollably, his tears like raindrops, his nose crimson, his face shaking, his body shivering and his expression saddening.

“Don't apologize… My dear boy… you haven't been a burden at all… you are my sweet boy after all, my little Keith… My troublesome, kiddo,”

She sobbed and then she looked at him, his devastation a lethal injection to her heart, then she wiped his tears away with her thumbs.

“I'll call to check on you… every day, Okay kiddo.”

He nodded imperceptibly, then he backed away since the train had stopped right behind Emily. 

He wiped his tears while the people around them embarked on the train. 

Realizing this—they decided to wrap up their goodbye… or rather their heartfelt “see you soon”.

As the train's doors closed behind Emily, she gazed at Keith, her eyes locking onto his with a mix of longing and resolve. 

Her hand rose in a gentle wave, and Keith mirrored the gesture, his fingers lifting in a slow, melancholic arc. 

The train's sleek body slid into the tunnel, a silver snake disappearing into the darkness, taking Emily with it.

The sudden stillness was almost palpable, a heavy blanket that wrapped around Keith's shoulders. 

He stood there, frozen in time, as the station's sounds gradually returned: the murmur of conversations, the rustle of footsteps, the distant hum of the city.

The crunch of snowy gravel beneath his boots was a tactile reminder of his surroundings as he began his walk home.

The umbrella's canvas canopy above him created a cocoon of dryness, a small comfort in the midst of his sorrow. 

With each step, the sound of his boots echoed through the stillness, a rhythmic accompaniment to his wandering thoughts. 

He navigated the crowded streets, while his mind wandered to the vast expanse of the unknown.

"America, huh?" he murmured, the word rolling off his tongue like a promise. "I wonder, will she like it there?" The sounds of the city swirled around him – the chatter of passersby, the wail of sirens in the distance – but his thoughts remained with the idea of a new world, a new life.

The neon lights of Shinjuku's nightlife cast a kaleidoscope of colors on the wet pavement, a reflection of the city's vibrant energy.

Couples strolled hand in hand, their laughter and conversation weaving in and out of the night air.

The smell of street food wafted through the crowds, enticing Keith's senses and momentarily distracting him from his thoughts.

Step, step, step, the city's rhythm began to synchronize with his footsteps. The crunch of gravel beneath his feet became a steady beat, a cadence that accompanied his musings. 

"Life sure is a maze, huh... It's full of unexpected twists and turns," he thought, his expression a mask of introspection. "One minute you're given a lifeline, the next it's yanked away... Aunt Emily was my lifeline... and now she's gone."

The irony wasn't lost on him – life had given him a second chance with his aunt, only to take her away again. 

The thought stung, but he couldn't help but smile wryly at the absurdity of it all.

As Keith walked, a fragment of his past resurfaced, a cherished memory that had been tucked away like a precious gem. 

His birthday, just a few months prior, unfolded before him like a warm, golden-hued snapshot.

The aroma of vanilla wafted through his mind, transporting him back to the moment Emily had surprised him with a small cake and a sleek smartphone. 

The room had been bathed in the soft, warm glow of joy, the kind that radiated from within. 

Emily's camera had captured the moment, freezing it in time: the first slice of cake, the phone's packaging being torn open, and the selfie they took together, their cheeks pressed together, their smiles intertwined. 

In that moment, time stood still, and all that mattered was the love and connection they shared.

As they sat down to savor the cake, the conversation flowed effortlessly, a gentle stream of words that wound its way through the afternoon. 

They talked about the latest anime, the manga he'd devoured, and his dreams for the future. 

The words spilled out like autumn leaves, rustling softly in the breeze.

This was a day etched in Keith's memory, a day that shone like a beacon in the darkness. 

For Emily, too, it was a milestone – the first time she'd seen him smile with abandon, his laughter and joy unbridled. 

The memory of that day lingered, a bittersweet reminder of the bond they shared. He continued marching at a steady pace, his boots crunching on the snow-covered path as he approached his aunt's house. 

The gate creaked shut behind him, and he noticed a figure knocking on the door. As he drew closer, his heart sank.

"Can I help yo—"

Keith's words caught in his throat as he realized who stood before him. It was none other than his mother.

A mix of emotions swirled inside him—anger, fear, and a deep-seated hurt. His voice shook as he spat. 

"What are you doing here?!"

His mother's expression was etched with pain, and she took a step forward.

 "Son, I—"

"Don't call me that," Keith interrupted, his voice rising. "You lost the right to call me your son a long time ago."

“Keith, I am your mother, why are you treating me like this?” She asked with a sad expression, while taking a few steps towards him.

The cold air seemed to vibrate with tension as Keith's eyes locked onto his mother's, it was as if his gaze cut through the air like well polished blades. He felt his stomach churn, his body tremble, and his heart freeze.

"Don't you dare play the victim," Keith snarled, his voice shaking in anger and fear as he took a few steps back. "You put me through hell, every single day, and now you have the audacity to act like I'm the one who's wronged you?"

The snowflakes continued to fall around them, casting a surreal silence over the scene. Keith's mother took another step forward, her eyes brimming with tears. 

"Keith, please understand—"

"Understand?" Keith's laughter was a jagged, mirthless sound, like the scrape of metal on stone. 

"You think I can just 'understand' after everything? You're not my mother – you never were. To me, you're just the woman who brought me into this abyss, then left me to drown in my own darkness." His words dripped with venom, each syllable laced with pain and resentment.

The air was heavy with tension, the silence between them thick and oppressive. Keith's anger seemed to seep into every pore, his very presence radiating a toxic mix of hurt and fury.

“I'm sorry Keith, please forgive—”

Before she could even finish her sentence Keith clenched his teeth and interrupted heartlessly.

“You’re so selfish… Asking for forgiveness just because it's hard for you to sleep at night, knowing that you had a child whom you wronged and treated like filth… do you remember what you used to call me every time he finished hitting you, 'what are you looking at, you f**cking demon' does that ring a bell?”

She flinched as her expression became fearful and reflective, all her wrong doings had come back to haunt her.

Her face shook, her hands trembling, her heart sinking as she looked at the boy who no longer saw her as his mother.

“You make me sick… I don't ever want to see your face again!”

With a burst of adrenaline, Keith turned and ran, leaving his umbrella behind. His mother shouted “Keith!” as she wailed, but Keith ignored her. 

The cold air stung his face, but he didn't feel it. He didn't feel anything except the overwhelming urge…. to escape. 

[To be continued…]