Chapter 14: An Alchemist with Explosive Problems

Our next quest was, on paper, the simplest one yet. We needed to identify a strange mineral that miners in Rockfall had uncovered. According to the quest description, the only person in the region with the expertise to analyze it was an alchemist named Chloe who lived on the outskirts of town.

"Finally, a normal quest," Rina said, stretching her arms. "No bandits, no silent mages, just a simple visit to a nerd."

"I resent that!" the Grimoire piped up from Luna's backpack. "We mages are intellectuals, not 'nerds'!"

We found Chloe's workshop easily enough. It was the only building with a constant, thin plume of purple smoke rising from its chimney. As we got closer, we heard a small fump sound, followed by a puff of green smoke from a window. Then a high-pitched "Oopsie!"

We knocked on the door. It swung open to reveal a young woman with wild, curly brown hair, a pair of soot-smudged goggles pushed up on her forehead, and a lab coat covered in stains of various alarming colors.

"Oh, hello!" she said cheerfully, wiping a chemical-stained hand on her coat, leaving a new blue streak. "Come in, come in! Watch your step!"

We entered her workshop, which looked less like a laboratory and more like the site of a very colorful explosion. Glass beakers bubbled ominously on benches, strange liquids dripped from the ceiling, and every surface was covered in a fine layer of glittery dust.

"I'm Chloe," she said, shaking Kenta's hand with way too much enthusiasm. "Sorry about the mess. I was working on a potion of enhanced tidiness, but I think I might have gotten the proportions wrong." She gestured to a corner where a broom was aggressively trying to sweep a sentient dust bunny into a corner.

We showed her the mineral. Her eyes lit up with scientific curiosity. "Fascinating! The crystalline structure is unlike anything I've ever seen! I'll need to run some tests."

She proceeded to run tests with the grace of a rampaging golem. She dropped the mineral into a bubbling beaker, which immediately turned plaid and started singing off-key opera. She tried to chip off a piece with a hammer, missed, and shattered a shelf full of potions, creating a small, contained rainbow-colored explosion that made all our hair stand on end.

Through it all, she remained impossibly upbeat. "Oh, dear! Well, that's another theory disproven! Science is fun!"

After an hour of barely-contained chaos, she finally had an answer. "It's a Catalyst Crystal!" she announced proudly. "It can dramatically amplify the power of any magical reaction! It's incredibly rare! And incredibly volatile!"

As if to prove her point, the crystal, which she had left sitting next to a beaker of what she called "Bouncy Juice," began to vibrate.

"Ah," Chloe said, her eyes wide. "We should probably leave."

We scrambled out of the workshop just as it erupted in a massive, glittering, non-lethal explosion that covered half the street in a thick, sticky, pink foam.

A few minutes later, the town mayor was there, along with several angry-looking guards. "Chloe!" the mayor yelled. "That's the third time this week! You are a menace! I'm officially evicting you from Rockfall!"

Chloe looked sad for a moment, then her face brightened. "Does this mean I'm free to travel?" She looked at us, her eyes sparkling with an idea. "Say! You're adventurers, right? You must encounter all sorts of rare ingredients and dangerous situations! That sounds like the perfect environment for field research! Can I come with you? I promise my explosions are mostly harmless!"

We looked at each other. Kenta, the useless leader. Rina, the brawler. Luna, the mute mage with her talking book. And me, the unlucky ex-goddess. A clumsy, explosion-happy alchemist would fit right in.

"Welcome to the team," I said, resigning myself to our fate. "We're probably all going to die."

"Hooray!" Chloe cheered.