Chapter 18: The Protagonist Wants to Brighten Up Her Life

Maxine led me to an area near that old library where I’d once talked with the professor.

The place looked like an abandoned training yard, covered in dust and cracked ground that spoke of years gone by. The wind slipped through like a faint whisper, carrying a heavy air that made breathing harder.

“Talk. What are you really after with all this?” Maxine said coldly, her silver eyes stabbing into me like she was trying to read my soul. “I thought I made it clear I don’t want anything to do with you.”

Time froze. At least, for me it did.

Her fine black hair swayed slowly with the breeze, every strand catching the light like it was suspended in air. And her face… sharp, clear, impossible to ignore. Once again I confirmed it: her beautiful silver eyes were cold. They told me with silent cruelty—You’re a nuisance. Stay away.

And yet, behind that icy glow, I saw something else. Sadness. Pain. The weight of someone carrying too much and choosing to stay alone.

I understood. Being vulnerable with others… it’s terrifying.

“But it’s necessary.”

That voice… Dana’s.

I turned instinctively—and suddenly I was back in that memory. The day I first met her.

We had just finished talking—or more like, she had interrogated me. I had shared things I’d never wanted anyone to know.

Why did I do it? Because she was a stranger.

It wasn’t that I thought she was kind, or good. It was simply because we had never seen each other before. She didn’t know me, and I didn’t know her.

And that gave me the courage to open up.

“Look, I’m not a psychologist or anything. So I can’t tell ya exactly how the human mind works. God, I don’t even understand my own. One day I’m craving cake, and the next I’d die for chocolate.”

“…Huh?” I blinked, lost at her weird tangent. Honestly, I think she got lost too, because she smiled awkwardly.

“Ah, forget it. I just drifted off,” she laughed it away, then grew serious again. “My point is—it’s necessary to be vulnerable with people. Yeah, some will judge ya. But you’ll never know how many will reach out a hand unless you speak up.”

That was hard to believe. That’s why I couldn’t talk to anyone. I was scared they’d reject me again.

“H-How could they accept me… if I can’t even accept myself? I hate being like this. I’m weak… pathetic… I’m nobody. I’m just—glk!”

Before I could finish listing my flaws, Dana squeezed my cheeks tight. Not cruelly, but firmly enough to shut down my spiral.

“Cut it out already. Don’t ya ever get tired of constantly thinking, ‘I’m this, I’m not this, what do they think of me’?”

“B-But…”

“Shhh. Want to know a secret? People will only see what you want them to see.”

I didn’t really get what she meant.

She sighed and went on:

“Ya hate yourself because you believe the crap those assholes in yer class say. So prove them wrong. Shove their words down their throats until they choke on them.”

“T-That sounds… violent.”

“So what? Sometimes it’s good to be bad. Or… do ya wanna keep being like this forever? You really gonna let those bastards dictate your life all the way to the grave?”

“N-No,” I whispered.

“Exactly! I know you can be more than this cute little ball of nerves. You can be strong, determined… and beautiful.”

“B-Beautiful?”

Dana suddenly leaned in close. Her sense of personal space was nonexistent.

“Yeah. You’re pretty. A little makeup here and there and you’ll be a total heartbreaker.”

That sounded… nice. I wanted to like myself more. I wanted to feel pretty. But still…

“I-I don’t think I can do it alone. I’m not strong like you,” I said, because even though we’d just met, I already knew it: Dana was strong. Me, on the other hand? I was weak, lacking will. Someone who needed others. “I… I just want to have friends again.”

“That’s it? That’s the problem?”

“…Eh?”

“Then done. I’ll be yar life coach, if I have to. I’ll help you bloom into someone strong and beautiful, away from all this crap. You’ll be free.”

“W-What?”

I couldn’t understand why someone like her would want to be friends with someone like me.

“Screw those jerks. If you don’t have friends, then I’ll be your bestie. And if you don’t like it… too bad. You already lost, ‘cause I’m not leaving your side until you crawl out of your turtle shell... or ya don´t wanna kill yourself. EJEM! Get ready...!”

Dana paused, then suddenly burst out laughing.

“Pfff… ha, ha, ha! I just realized, I gave this whole speech and I don’t even know your name.”

“Eh? A-ah…” I realized the same thing, and her laughter was contagious, spilling from me like a spell. “Ha, ha… y-you’re right. I’m Julia Brand.”

From that day on, she kept her promise. She dragged me to malls, we spent afternoons putting on makeup, she even introduced me to more friends.

Eventually… I bloomed, just like she promised. She set me free.

She was my light.

And I want to give back to the world a little of that kindness and light she gave me.

I swallowed hard. My heart pounded like a runaway drum, but this time I wouldn’t back down.

I wanted to help her. I wanted Maxine to break free from her shell of rejection and accept the hand reaching out to her.

Just like I did.

This time, I wouldn’t chicken out.

I wasn’t that scared little girl anymore.

I wouldn’t let Dana down.

I’d make sure my feelings reached her—loud and clear. Clear enough to break through her shell.

I took a deep breath, gathering every ounce of courage I had.

“I admit it… I didn’t help you ‘cause I’m a good person. I did it because… I feel like we could really get each other. Plus, I don’t wanna see you all lonely, ya know?”

Maxine raised an eyebrow, baffled.

“What the hell are you talking about, weirdo?”

I inhaled, filling my lungs.

“What I mean is—” I shut my eyes, then opened them wide, ready to shout it out. “MY NAME’S KATHRYN VON ADELHEID! I’M A DUMB NEN WHO KEEPS GETTING INTO TROUBLE!”

Silence fell. Only the echo of my words bouncing off the walls remained.

“…What?” Maxine muttered, brow furrowed.

“I’M A LONER THAT NOBODY HERE WANTS AROUND!” I shouted, my voice cracking. “MAYBE I DON’T UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING YOU FEEL OR WHAT YOU’RE GOING THROUGH, BUT…!”

I drew in one more breath and let out what I’d been holding back all this time.

“BUT I WANNA BE YOUR REAL FRIEND!”

Silence again. Heavy. Uncomfortable.

“Seriously? All this for that? I don’t buy it.”

“It’s true! I’m not lying. I just wanna be your friend.”

Maxine began circling me slowly, her steps echoing against the ground. She looked at me like a wary hound, inspecting every inch of me, searching for cracks in my words.

One loop. Then another. Until she leaned in too close, her breath brushing my face.

But this time, I didn’t flinch. I held her gaze steady. Every word I’d said came straight from my heart.

Maxine tilted her head.

“…So, why do you want us to be friends? I still don’t get it.”

I looked down, though my voice stayed firm.

“Because I don’t have any friends. The first time… I lied. I wanted to believe I wasn’t being childish or selfish, so I convinced myself I was doing it for your sake. But no. It’s for me. It’s ‘cause I don’t wanna be alone. And if it helps you too… then even better.”

She looked at me calmly, though her eyes were still cold.

“…You’re selfish, huh?”

“Totally,” I admitted without hesitation. “Sorry. But I’m not giving up. You can turn me down now, but I’ll just keep coming back with new ideas until you say yes.”

Maxine’s brow rose, surprised at my stubbornness.

“That’s called harassment.”

“It doesn’t count if it’s me!”

“Why not?”

“‘Cause… I’m the protag, duh!”

An awkward silence stretched out.

And then…

“Pff… ha, ha, ha!”

I froze.

Was she… laughing?

For real?

“W-Was what I said that funny?” I stammered, cheeks burning.

Maxine’s smile was genuine, almost mocking, but warm.

“Nothing…” she said, still holding back laughter. “It’s just… ha… I can’t believe everything you’ve done was just ‘cause you were lonely. Do you know how many days I’ve spent trying to figure out what the hell was in your head? I expected something deeper. And what’s with this ‘being the protagonist’ thing… How old are you, seriously?”

My lips trembled into a smile.

This was good, right?

I’d seen her smile. That had to mean things were going well.

“So what do you say? Wanna try being friends? C’mon, we both know you need a little fun in this place, and who better for that than someone who kinda gets what you’re going through here.”

“Hm…” Maxine stepped back a bit, but never broke eye contact.

She crossed her arms, rolled her neck until it cracked, then pulled out a small device from her pocket. She glanced at it, then looked back up as she started walking toward me.

“I guess… I could use a little fun. I’ve already maxed out every game I own.”

“D-Does that mean we’re frie—?”

Before I could finish, she pressed a finger to my lips.

“Nah. Not yet. I still don’t trust you. Friends is a strong word. Let’s just say… acquaintances.”

Tears welled in my eyes. But not from sadness.

That was her way of saying she was giving in, little by little. That I wasn’t alone anymore. That neither of us was.

“Th-Thanks, Maxine!” I mumbled, clumsily wiping my eyes.

She sighed, but there was a different glow in her gaze.

“You’re welcome, Kathryn… You know what? Your name’s kinda complicated. I’ll just call you Ryn. And you can call me Maxi. That’s what my acquaintances use.”

Just like that, Maxi started walking back toward the Academy.

My heart gave a little leap of joy.

Maybe we weren’t friends yet, but this was definitely the start of something. I was happy, but at the same time, a shiver ran down my spine. Why? I just… felt like the System was watching me. If it’s even possible for a black dialogue box to do that.

I wondered why it hadn’t shown up these past few days.

Probably scheming something bad. Good thing it didn’t pop up now.

Lost in my thoughts, I stood frozen like an idiot—until Maxi’s voice snapped me out of it.

“Move it, kitty.”

“W-Wait for me!”