Chapter 16:

Kasumi totally goes to the mall

Former Magical Girls and their Daily Lives


Kasumi stood in the middle of a mall. The mall was your average mall. People were walking around. The shoppers shopped. The sun was shining. And the clock was ticking.

Then a little Hedgehog Scout approached Kasumi. The girl was half the height of Kasumi and wore the Hedgehog Scout uniform, complete with her sash and all of the badges she earned were sewed on the sash.

"Hello, would you like to buy some cookies?" the girl asked, holding up a box of cookies.

Kasumi looked at the cookies. They were snickerdoodle. She didn't like snickerdoodle.

Without hesitation, Kasumi pulled out her pistol and shot an entire clip into the girl's chest. Kasumi reloaded and emptied the new clip into the limb body. She stood there, blankly staring at the body.

All of the customers continued to do what they were doing beforehand. Kasumi looked around. There was a store that sold chocolate chip cookies. It was called the Chocolate Chip Cookie Store. She went to the store. She liked chocolate chip cookies.

She looked at the first display for chocolate chip cookies. She had a gut feeling that she couldn't afford it. She couldn't tell for sure because the numbers were in Spanish.

"Boujour," a maid wearing a bike helmet greeted Kasumi, "Como estas? Ik ben Maria. Ik ben katten."

"Sorry, I don't need help. I'm looking for soup. You know, the chocolate chip kind."

"Ja," the maid said. Her helmet was a little bigger since the last time she spoke. She pointed at the red exit sign that hung from the ceiling.

"I hate you," Kasumi said, smiling.

Kasumi walked to where the exit sign pointed. She found an elevator door. She pressed the button next to it, and the door opened, revealing that it was full of jello. She walked into the jello.

Kasumi opened her eyes in the jello, and she was in the sky. Pretty clouds in the sky. However, she didn't appreciate being in the sky. A tax collector approached her while she was in freefall, asking her if she found Jesus yet. She responded that she thought that He was in the soup aisle, turning soup into wine. The tax collector informed Kasumi that this was a felony, put on a pair of swimming goggles, loaded his shotgun, and ascended upwards.

As she saw the ground quickly approach her, she realized an issue with all this. It wasn't her turn to move. How could she forget? How stupid is she? She promptly stopped falling a few inches from the ground.

She waited. She had this weird feeling. Do you know how you feel when you are reading or something and then you suddenly stop for no reason, and you feel like everything is moving really fast but also really slow? You don't feel disoriented or anything. It's just a weird feeling. Am I the only one who ever felt like that?

Nothing told Kasumi that it was her turn now. She kinda just felt the heartbeat of the universe signal her. Normal people won't understand.

Anyway, she fell on the grassy lawn. The grass slowly entangled her until she couldn't breathe. An army of fire ants slowly approached the girl. Kasumi tried to figure out how to get out of this situation, but before she figured out that she was actually asleep and dreaming, a man with a lawnmower passed by and destroyed the violent grass. Kasumi thanked the man for his help, but he couldn't understand Japanese so he kinda just ignored her.

Kasumi dusted herself off and looked around. There weren't any buildings around. Well, there was one. It was a convenience store with a large yellow sign with black text. What the text was Kasumi didn't know. It was in English.

She entered the store. She saw normal convenience stuff. There was snacks, super glue, the King James Version of the Bible, a man dressed in a big costume made to look like a big brown shopping bag, big coins made to crush people's feet, a signed copy of the dictionary, and a framed picture of your mom dropping you as a baby.

Since Kasumi was looking for soup, she went to the clothes aisle. But unfortunately, there were only clothes. Kasumi seemed in distress.

"Hey," some girl said. Kasumi didn't recognize the girl. The girl was a short Mexican girl with an acne attack on her face. "Don't worry too much about it. The world is going to end soon."

The floor immediately cracked, revealing a massive machine that ran on gears. Kasumi and the Mexican girl both fell in the hole. The darkness overtook the light, and Kasumi never saw the other girl again.

What Kasumi saw next was Risa, but this Risa wasn't normal. She seemed to be run by gears, but her flesh was still organic. The movement seemed to be awkward.

"Want to play hopscotch?" Risa asked.

"Sure," Kasumi responded.

There was a hopscotch drawing on the sidewalk behind her drawn in chalk. I was crudely drawn, but it was still usable.

"We should play quickly, however," Risa said, "There's a lot of water over there." She pointed at the massive wave of water that tore through the neighborhood. With the wave, there was also a massive black stormy rain cloud that destroyed every building it touched. The buildings would immediately collapse like they were already rigged to explode, but there wasn't any explosive to be seen.

"Ah, yes," Kasumi said after seeing all of this, "If the water touches the hopscotch drawing, it'll wash away all of the chalk, and we can't play anymore."

Kasumi threw the first rock onto the hopscotch drawing and jumped on the hopscotch on one foot. Once she reached the rock, she stopped to pick up the rock. Unfortunately, she couldn't because there wasn't a rock, but in its place, it was the bullet-riddled body of the little girl she killed.

Kasumi felt a massive amount of regret.

"No no no no. Please don't do this to me. I didn't mean to do it. Get me out of here! GET ME OUT!"

Sunlight gently touched Kasumi's eyes. She opened them to find that she was in her futon. She believed that she was back in the real world and that she was fine.

"Hey, Kasumi, come eat breakfast, you sleepyhead," Risa said from the kitchen.

"Okay, I'm coming," Kasumi replied, getting out of her futon and already forgetting what happened. She acted like it was a normal Thursday.

Parsatag
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