No Point In Wishing

I wasn't sure why, but I ended up following Harumi back to her apartment. The conversation seemed to flow easily after guzzling a few frigid coffee milks and walking beneath the stars along the Sumida River. Harumi mentioned that the warehouse I had been staying in was often used strictly for drug trading and storage, as well as harboring special women once in a while for prostitution before selling them to a buyer or trafficker. Naturally, she explained that Charlotte would blow a gasket if she learned I was using that space as a sleeping quarters, so my best bet would be to hang out with her until I received an official rank among the few battalions run by the Saiko-komon or Wakagashira members, namely Kazuya, Nobu, Takeshi, or Harumi.

She saw to it that I was fitted in loose pajamas for sleeping, and was fed a deluxe-sized convenience store curry katsu meal with a side of milk because I was, and I quote,
"Skin and bones."

I did my best to act unfazed upon hearing that term for the fourth time in just a couple of days, but the annoyance was starting to slip through.

"I'm not skin and bones; I'm just... petite for my age."
I responded with a slight scowl.

"Then why could I see your ribcage through your tummy in the bath, Mika-chan?"
Harumi retorted with a smug grin.

"Because, I haven't eaten in days. That onigiri from the warehouse was the only real food I've seen since Monday."
I snapped back, forgetting that normal people don't skip meals for days at a time.

"Since Monday?! You're just proving my point! Normal people don't go days without a decent meal."
Harumi took a generous swig of her beer.

"Like I said, I'm not a normal person. You get used to the feeling of skipping meals when you don't have them readily available."
I finished my katsu, gulping down my milk to help ease the spice on my tongue.

"That's not going to slide on my watch, 'kay? You'll be so plump that you'll have to start dieting soon if you keep eating my kind of food."
Harumi let out a chuckle, finishing her beer and reaching for a second can.

As if! The day that I get fat will be the day that I die.

I stood from my position under her chabudai table, flopping down onto her sofa with a small groan.
"I'm not used to stuffing myself this much. I think I'm going to be sick."

"See?"
Harumi mimicked my position, laying directly beside the couch with her beer still in hand.
"You're already putting on some weight. Guys like a girl with a bit of chub on her lower tummy, Mika-chan."

I grimaced at her casual body comment, and scowled harder at the mention of boys.
"Gross. I don't have any interest in guys."

Harumi erupted into laughter, as if I had said something funny. Perhaps, it was the beer making her giddy.
"That's such bullshit! You're at that age when everything is awkward, aren't you? Unless you're like me, that is."
Her lips curled into a sly smirk.

"Like you? In what way?!"
I shot my head up, curious as to how she thought I resembled her in any way whatsoever.

"You know... like how I'm into girls?"
She sipped her beer with that same smirk plastered on her face, her tired eyes begging for a good gossip.

"What?! N-no! I..."
I could feel my face turning red.

What does it matter, anyway?! The only men I've truly found handsome are Kazuya and Shun Oguri! But girls?!

"It's fine, Mika-chan."
Harumi let out a high-pitched yawn, letting her head rest on the tatami.
"Boys, girls, it doesn't make a difference to me. You're unique, and I like that."

"I'm not trying to be unique..."
Even I could hear the pout in my own voice. Luckily for me, Harumi had drifted into a peaceful sleep, leaving me with a burning crisis about my own... preferences.

At least she's quiet now. Charlotte was right; Harumi is a total problem child.

* * *

I hadn't been used to waking up so routinely in my previous life before joining the yakuza. Kazuya's words resonated with me as I sat before Ninagawa Charlotte,
"You didn't know how easy you had it."

He was right. My head was throbbing with drowsiness; Charlotte's long fingers casually drummed against Harumi's chabudai table as she explained what exactly I would be doing for my apprenticeship period.

"Normally, sakazuki ceremonies happen months, sometimes years, after your apprenticeship; however I tend to do things a bit less formally than what could be considered proper."
She let out a long sigh, seemingly conflicted about how exactly she would be testing my loyalty and obedience.
"With nobody to vouch for you, and no family ties to sever, you've put me at quite a crossroads, puppy."

I could feel my brow furrowing at her lack of preparation.
"I'm willing to do just about anything, boss. Even if said things aren't exactly normal for a girl my age."

"That's exactly the thing, puppy."
She brought a match to the bowl of her pipe, puffing like a chimney as Harumi set three coffee mugs on the table.
"Normally, I just send my Kobun out with Kazuya or Nobu to do some loansharking or drug trafficking... but you're not exactly the intimidating type. You're small, frail, and practically adorable."

I definitely wasn't fond of being called adorable, but I knew better than to respond angrily.
"Why don't you just send me anyway? I'm sure with Kazuya behind me, they'll get the message."
I spoke against the rim of my mug, wincing slightly at the temperature against my lips.

"Precisely. Though, Kazuya has better things to do than train Kobun. He's already given me quite the attitude over it in the past."
Charlotte's lips hovered over her mug, slowly creeping into a sultry grin.

"Something on your mind, darling?"
Harumi spoke, casually leaning her head on Charlotte's shoulder.

"Indeed. I think I have the perfect client for our little puppy."
Charlotte pulled her cellphone from the sash of her kimono, bringing it to her ear as she stared deeply into my unblinking eyes.

"Kazuya, I need you to come pick the puppy up from Harumi's place. Take her to Jin's ramen shop for her first official test."
Without giving Kazuya time to respond, she shoved the phone back into her sash, giving Harumi a few disgustingly exaggerated kisses.

"Jin? Is he some kind of... easy target?"
I stared at my coffee, trying my best not to watch their intimate tongue-sucking.

Gross.

"Just follow Kazuya's lead and you'll be fine. Now, scram."
Charlotte didn't so much as look up from her kisses, waving dismissively like I was an annoying pet.

"Yes, boss."
I stood up and headed outside, not wanting to spend even a second longer in their company.

Just what exactly am I supposed to be doing in a ramen shop? Charlotte seems more like a dictator than a boss, using her expendables to make a profit. What a bitch.

The pencil skirt of my suit was starting to bother me, not giving me proper legroom to squat against the wall as I waited for Kazuya. I began to wish I had something a bit more breathable, like those sailor uniforms that all of the girls my age wore when going to school.

If I had parents, maybe I would be chatting with girls my age about the latest trends at my school desk right now, fanning my collared shirt with a notebook to dry the sweat stains so that my crush wouldn't see my bra through the fabric. If I had that kind of life, I'm sure I would have never ended up meeting these odd characters.

The honking of a car horn snapped me from my trance. It was Kazuya, looking absolutely pissed at having to pick me up for something so mundane.

"Get in, brat. I've got better things to do than babysit!"
He practically screamed at me.

I could see the dark circles under his eyes as I slid into the passenger seat. I dared not ask about Jin's ramen shop until we arrived. Until then, I would simply appreciate Kazuya's amazing taste in music.