Shadow and Crystal

Azreal jolted awake in a cold sweat. His heart raced like it was attempting to tear itself out of his chest. He panted, trying to calm himself down. ‘That memory...right after I was pardoned...’ He clenched the blanket tightly. Even though it had been years and he was a grown man now, his lungs and heart still constricted in panic at the reminded of what he had experienced that day. No matter how much time had passed, the memory of having his existence utterly rejected when he was at his lowest and craving human kindness remained as jolting and painful as the day it happened. It was like a raw, festering wound in his soul that refused to completely heal. Of all his awful memories, this was the most traumatic for him to recall; it was the moment he finally hit rock bottom and couldn't hold himself together anymore. 'Why am I having all these nightmares about my past all the sudden?’ Azreal wondered as he stared at the dusky ceiling. ‘It’s been happening more often lately. Is it because of what happened with Scath? Or because of the war? Or is it something else? Maybe this particularly dream just happened because we’re going to the capitol...I can't help but be reminded of that pain every time I go to Nacre...'

Azreal jumped as Mari let out a snore. He looked up to his right and saw the white-haired woman sprawled out so thoroughly that she was half hanging out of the bed. He looked at her peaceful face and gently rising back for a moment before rolling over and looking to his right. Sariel was curled up on the couch in a position that couldn’t be comfortable, similarly looking completely at ease in a deep sleep. Stretching himself out on the floor, Azreal pulled the blanket tighter around him and stared at the ceiling. ‘It’s fine. It’s just a bad dream. Who cares if it was real? It happened a long time ago. It doesn’t matter anymore. You’re safe. You’re with your friends and no one is going to hurt you like that again. You’re sleeping in an inn, not on the streets. You aren’t back in that place, and you never have to go back...you're not welcome in the cathedral anyway. I’d rather die than go back there...’ Azreal attempted to comfort himself as he drifted back into a fitful sleep.

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“Are you sure you’re alright?’” Sariel asked with a tone of mild concern. “You look rather green.” Azreal massaged his burning eyes. “Yeah, I just slept like crap last night.” Sariel took a sip of his coffee and eyed Azreal. “No, I’m not so soft that I can’t sleep on the ground anymore!” Azreal snapped. “I did sleep! It was just...a really bad sleep that made me even more tired."  Sariel shrugged. “Whatever you say.”

Azreal looked around the dinning hall. It was lively but, for such a busy inn, it wasn’t as crowded as he had thought it would be. “I’m starting to get hungry. If your girlfriend doesn’t hurry up, I’m going to order and start eating without her.” It was Azreal’s turn to shrug. “Doesn’t bother me. Mari should be down soon. I finally got her out of bed, but it will probably take her a while to get ready. She sleeps hard and was pretty out of it.” He ignored the 'girlfriend' comment that was constantly coming from Sariel's mouth these days. “I’m surprised. With how excited she is to see the capitol, I would have thought she’d be the first one up.” Azreal stirred some honey into his tea. “It’s a hit or miss. She’s a ball of energy that surpasses my brother, but she eats like a monster and sleeps hard. Well, I guess it’s not too strange. She must just burn herself out and need to reboot.” He smiled softly. “She’s an odd one...but I don’t hate that part of her. She brings excitement into my life, whether I want it or not.”

A yawn as loud as a lion’s roar interrupted the men as they talked. “Morning, Mari.” “Mornin’.” Mari mumbled, collapsing into an empty chair. “You need some coffee.” Sariel wasn’t asking a question. “Sounds good.” she murmured laying her head on the table. “Are you okay?” Azreal asked. “Yeah. Tired.” He chuckled. “If only you were quiet like this more often!” “Shadup”.

A waitress brought Mari a cup of coffee and Sariel became busy placing their breakfast order. Azreal added some sugar and cream to Mari’s cup. “Thanks.” “I know how you like sweet stuff. And you look like you could use a sugar boost right now.” Mari slowly raised her head and grabbed the cup. She took a deep drink and closed her eyes. “Mmm, that’s good.” Azreal rested his head on his hand and smiled. ‘She’s cute when she’s tired. Give it until the food comes and she’ll be back to bouncing off the walls and wanting to sprint to the capitol.’

Turning back to his companions, Sariel noted how Azreal immediately knew Mari’s preferences and the fond look on his face. “So, do you plan to go home directly after meeting the king, or are you going to need somewhere to stay?” He wisely avoided commenting on his observations. “I’m going to say we’re going to need to stay somewhere overnight.” Azreal looked thoughtful. “We’re going to spend the daylooking around the city together after I’m done meeting with the king. Knowing how excitable this one is, it’ll take the whole day and I don’t want to rush her since she’s never been to Nacre before. And there’s no reason that we have to travel home at night.” 

“I see.” Sariel dug in his pocket and pulled out a small silver key. “Here’s the spare key to my room. You’re welcome to stay the night on you’re return, too.” Azreal took the key gratefully. “Thanks, Sariel. This visit is important, but we’re not on an urgent timeline, so I’d like to be as leisurely as I can so we can enjoy ourselves a little. Not having to get home by nightfall or find somewhere to stay in the city makes it easier.” Sariel nodded at him. “It’s no inconvenience for me. It makes it easier for all of us if we trust each other and offer temporary lodging. Besides, after how you let me stay at your house and allowed me to join in that wonderful little party with your neighbors, it’s the least I could do.”

‘It’s odd,’ Azreal reflected. ‘I feel like...we’re friends now. If not friends, then we’re definitely teammates and comrades for real now. It’s strange hearing the word ‘trust’ come out of this ice-king's mouth, but he’s not wrong. As he put it before, we were only ever working together out of convivence and the King’s desire, but we actually know each other now. I guess being the sole survivors and spending a week injured with only each other to talk to is good for breaking the ice. Besides...Sariel saved my life. He could have left me behind, but he chose to risk his own safety to get me out of there.’ He looked at Sariel and Mari as they talked about the capital city, ‘I guess I have Mari to thank, too. I’d probably never have been willing to trust Sariel if not for her ability to assess his character. And I guess finding out that I had her and my family helped Sariel realize I was a human being with a life outside of being a mercenary that I never talked about, not just a hired blade. Although I may have gone overboard with singing my praises for Mari when I was injured and depressed in the infirmary...’

“Hey, Az.” Mari suddenly turned to him with her big green eyes, having already perked up from the caffeine. “What’s Nacre like? And the palace? Will I get to see the King with you, or no?” Azreal jumped. “Ah, sorry. I wasn’t paying attention. The city is...beautiful. I know Andressa is considered the most beautiful place in the kingdom, but I personally think Nacre is far prettier. It’s....like a big jewel, made of white stone and precious metals. The palace is...well they call it the ‘crystal palace’ for a reason. It’s made of crystal and covered in flowers and fountains and...it just really looks like something from a fairytale. The whole city does.” A fond look crept across Azreal’s face. Even if the city’s people rejected him and made him uneasy, the city itself was a marvel he couldn't deny enjoying. “I don’t think you’ll be able to meet the king this time, Mari. We need to talk about the war and serious stuff. I was thinking that I’d introduce you to one of my friends and have him entertain you while I’m in my meeting.”

Mari tilted her head. “You...have a friend? Besides me and Sariel?” Azreal rolled his eyes. “Me and Sariel only became more than work acquaintances a few weeks ago and I’ve known you for all of a month. But...you’re not wrong.” He huffed. “Other than you two, I’ve only ever had one real friend, because you know how I am with people. He works at the royal court. We initially met because of my job but...he’s a good guy. And interesting. Trust me, meeting him will be a hundred times more fun for you than meeting the king.”

“I’ll remember to tell him that next time I'm summoned.” Sariel intoned as he sipped his coffee. “Quiet, you!” Azreal snapped. “Okay, I trust you!” Mari beamed. “Besides, as long as I’m with you, it’ll be fun, no matter who we meet or what we do!” Azreal couldn’t help but feel a surge of excitement as his heartbeat sped up. “Y-yeah. Likewise...” Sariel took an obnoxious slurp of his drink. “Hey!” Azreal’s vein throbbed in irritation at the peanut gallery of one.

‘Maybe I should’ve just kept my big mouth shut about Mari, because Sariel is going to be worse than nanny at this rate!’