It’s Only Fair That We Get To Steal It Back

The truck sped along the carved passage molded among the mountains, practically a safe with wheels. The unknowns it carried, hidden from my quasi-omniscience, stuck out like a star in the barren space.

E.T. held Raven in a princess carry as they hovered over the vehicle, though the oni mask on their faces ruined any semblance of romance. Their flight was owed to the shawl on E.T., a magical artifact called the hagoromo, also known as a feather mantle.

To not lose to him in this talent show, I prepared Junk-o’s wall-climbing jacket for Raven. Pestilence had recovered it from the police, shedding a few fake tears about wanting to remember her friend. The coat wasn’t just a trophy and a fashion statement; once Raven alighted on the truck with a clank, the jacket kept her from falling off.

Oh wait, her sense of social consideration must have fallen off, because she whispered to me, “I won’t be part of the stealing. Since you totes seemed into this, you should do it.” She wouldn’t be paying me by the hour; that much was certain. It was annoying that she shoved it all onto me, but I didn’t complain, since she wouldn’t be much help here anyway.

E.T. stuck around in the skies after dropping Raven off, circling to the back of the trailer. He unsheathed a blade from his belt and aimed it at the rear doors. Clouds gathered in the previously clear sky above, and a precise bolt of lightning plunged from the heavens to break apart the electric lock.

The doors swung open with the motion of the truck. And a swarm of gunshots burst forth. Two guns from the sound of it, matching the transportation plans, but I was still on edge. I couldn’t be sure if the plans I grabbed with quasi-omniscience were the most updated version. This was while the blind spot still pulled a veil over the truck interior. I needed to comb through every nugget of information, those muffled shouting and faint vibrations from movements, all for an ounce more certainty.

Waiting at the edge of the roof, I watched E.T. shake off the barrage of projectiles. The shawl was obviously bulletproof, but the guards kept shooting at E.T., with nothing to show for their efforts. I could almost see E.T. smirking through his oni mask.

“Are those… gunshots?” Raven whispered.

“Don’t do anything if you want to live,” I replied. Perfect timing. The continuous barking of the weapons stopped. Hands gripped onto the edge, I dropped off and swung myself inside.

Behind a pile of cubic metal boxes, the two guards were reloading their firearms with a click. I lunged forward in time to snatch their guns away; years of disarming experience worked like a charm. And with a graceful spin, I flicked the pistols off onto the road.

I could have threatened them with the guns, but that would have risked the guards wrestling them back. A risk that was particularly likely with the help of their magical rings.

The metal boxes stirred at first, then they launched at me. Deadly as shrapnel, a direct smack in the head, and I could die of blood loss. The magical rings on each of their fingers worked together to grant telekinesis. To use the limited slices of the magic pie on the guards here, the item must just be that valuable.

I ran along the walls of the trailer, taking full advantage of the ability of my jacket, but the boxes wouldn’t give me a break. Persistent and slightly annoying, maybe I should’ve bought the Hand of Glory. That would have completed the heist in mere seconds.

Another question blared in my mind: where was the magical artifact we were supposed to steal? Only the guards and metal boxes, nothing else. And they were acting too carelessly with the cubes. Or were they? With the presence of the artifact, I had no access to their inner worlds.

A strong current brushed past me, sucking the air out of the compartment; suffocating, as if my lungs would pop out of my mouth. Still, the jacket kept me firmly on the wall, whilst my metallic assailants were extracted from the equation, scattered out onto the trail, some even dropping out of the concrete bounds into the embrace of the dry grass.

Straining my eyes open against the current, I caught a glimpse of E.T. directing the wind with his blade. His stunt gave me near certainty that the magical artifact was the Heavenly Sword of Gathering Clouds. Yeah, the name was a mouthful; Cloudie sounded better.

Returning Cloudie to its sheath after a job well done, E.T. swooped down to check the contents of the dispersed boxes. The truck continued its sail along towards its destination with me still inside, and E.T.’s figure got smaller until a turn in the path slipped a chunk of mountain between us.

The cyclone inside subsided, and so the guards could stop using their magic to hold their ground. Strange. I couldn’t read their mind for their next move. My own presence wouldn’t stop my quasi-omniscience from reading my surroundings, so something else close by must still be interfering.

The artifact is still in the truck. This conclusion gave me a sudden chill. Only the two guards and I remained here; the rest of the items had spewed out through the storm that E.T. raised. Could it be on the guards? No, I should think about other possibilities first.

“Can we get off the truck now?” Raven whispered under her breath while the guards were busy regaining their composure. I almost forgot that the body belonged to her. Before I could speak into her mind, the oni mask started sliding off Raven’s face.

Even though Raven had also disguised herself with makeup under the mask, the safest bet was still to keep her face hidden, especially with a security camera watching from the corner of the ceiling. My hand moved by reflex, slapping onto the plastic surface and clutching it in place.

After failing to expose my face, a guard launched himself at me, poised to throw a punch once close enough. I stepped upwards along the wall to dodge the attack, but that turned out to be a trap. The moment one of my feet left the metal surface, the second guard struck me from a distance with telekinesis. A force had grabbed onto my body like an invisible hand, tearing me from the wall entirely, too abruptly for my magical jacket to keep up.

The leftover momentum hurled me out of the truck. Raven’s shriek didn’t help, and the disconcerting motion nauseated me. My limbs flopped in search of any shred of support. I was getting closer to falling out. A deadly blur dwelled underneath me. It was the texture of asphalt blended together by speed.

I wouldn’t survive the impact. No, that’s a lie. I actually would. Raven would lose her life, and I would take over her body. The mere possibility of Raven’s death electrified my brain. Before I could be reminded of the deaths happening around the planet, I reached for the ending point of the wall, commandeering all of Raven’s muscles in this minuscule time frame.

Two of my fingers barely tapped the metal wall. That was enough. My jacket worked its magic, and those fingers stayed glued to the surface. It was worth it to feel if my arm was being torn apart. I managed to latch onto the truck, albeit dangling off the wall like a live fish bait, not an ideal position to defend myself from.

The jacket adapted to the constant telekinetic pressure on me and on my mask. With more leeway, I still wasted no time in gripping onto the edge with my free hand. Fighting the wind against my skin, I shifted my body to maneuver my feet to the outside surface of the truck. Since I had no clue where the magical artifact was, it was best for me to stay hidden. The telekinetic ability required a clear line of sight to use.

I stretched one hand to join my feet on the smooth and wobbly surface. No matter how reliable I knew the jacket was, scenarios of it failing still flashed through my mind. With reservations, I commanded the hand to let go of the truck's edge.

But it didn’t.

Raven was interfering, asking her hand to hold on for dear life.

“Let go!” I yelled, almost speaking her name.

A guard grabbed onto my sleeve, so I punched him in the face. The other one stayed at the back, pushing me with his telekinesis. I willed my hand muscles to move. They budged, sliding off the metal surface; friction opposed me at every slightest of progress.

Until I finally overpowered Raven, and the hand flew free. I scrambled to walk up the metal wall onto the top.

“Get me out of this place, Death-san. You totes know a way to leave here, right? We’re about to fall off!” Raven screeched.

“We have to finish stealing first,” I said.

“No! We have to leave now!” Spoken like a two-year-old, and acting like one too, her panic drove her to rush towards the drop. I hijacked her leg muscle to trip her.

“Calm down.” Well, these two words didn’t calm her at all, but before I could dwell on my use of clichés. My neck was locked in a chokehold. One of the guards followed me up here.

His telekinesis wasn’t powerful enough for flight, but he must have climbed along the truck ledge. While I was distracted by Raven, he snuck up on me. I struggled with everything I had, hitting and kicking and even biting, but Raven’s physique fell short. The world around me darkened, and quiet swallowed up Raven’s mind.

But my awareness persisted as always, unaffected by the tug of unconsciousness. Rather, I waited for Raven to fall dormant, because that would be when the tide of the fight turned.