Just one more chance, please (Hai’s perspective)

Love was supposed to feel warm, wasn’t it? Like home, like comfort, like being seen. But with Drain, it felt like standing outside in the cold, waiting for someone to open the door.

I stayed. For months, I stayed. I convinced myself that maybe if I just loved him harder, poured more of myself into him, he’d notice. Maybe he’d finally see how lonely I was, how much I needed him to hold me the way I held him.

I gave him everything— soft touches, thoughtful messages, unwavering patience. I listened to every little thing that made him happy, but when I spoke, my words drifted into nothing. He never asked why I had been quieter lately. Never wondered why my “good mornings” became just “mornings” my “okay!!!” became “ok” and my “why” became “alright.”

And worst of all? Everyone else saw it but him.

My friends laughed at me, humiliated me for staying.

“Hai naku, ikaw talaga. Ang tanga mo” (Translation; Hai, you are such an idiot)

“Thought you said to love yourself more, what is this?”

“You deserve someone who actually gives a damn, not some boy who is damn stupid who can’t even see and accept you.”

I laughed it off but deep down, it hurt. They were right. I knew they were right. But I still defended him, made excuses, told myself, “He’s not that bad. He just doesn’t know how to show it.”

Until I couldn’t defend him anymore.

I knew I was disappearing emotionally and mentally.

So I made a decision. One more month. One last attempt before I let it go.

And as the days passed, I started retreating—not out of anger, not to hurt him, but because I had already mourned the love I never received.

I stopped filling in the silences. I stopped reminding him I was there. And he didn’t notice.

So one night, I simply said to him,

“I can’t be the woman you want.”

Ofc, that was not what I wanted to say so what I told him instead is, “I can’t stand being with you.”