The Trial

The metal cage enclosed around them. Kanji hit it with the hammer, making a loud clashing sound. The hammer bounced back, and the cage wouldn’t budge.

I can’t modify it? How is that possible?

“If there is one thing even Izanagi could not escape, that is the clutches of judgement,” Justice said, “so, let us begin!”

He raised his arms. A movie-theatre-sized TV screen lowered from the darkness. White, pixelated text at the top of the screen read “Crime Toll:”

“You will be faced with a series of challenges ranging in difficulty, depending on your previous actions. I’m sure yours won’t be so bad, you’re so young after all. Let us start the tally!”

The words rolled down the screen in a red pixelated font, making a low beeping noise with the appearance of every letter.

OKIMOTO KANJI
MURDER X20
ARSON X105
THEFT X7
TRESPASSING X2
FLYING ILLEGALLY X2
NOISE VIOLATIONS X157
PUBLIC URINATION X1

“Eh… you did that, Kanji-kun?” Yuki stared at him.

“I-I don’t know what he’s talking about!”

HATANAKA YUKI
MURDER X379
ARSON X1049
THEFT X1

TRESPASSING X2
FLYING ILLEGALLY X1

JAYWALKING X10
NOISE VIOLATIONS X703

LITTERING X573

Three hundred seventy-nine? That can’t be good…

“OH! I did not expect that,” Justice said, “That is quite a list. And the verdict is…”

DIFFICULTY: IMPOSSIBLE

Impossible?!

“Ah, well… I suppose there was reason to be worried after all. So, let us begin!”

The area around the cage turned into a smudge of lights. A humming sound.

A crowd cheered. The cage disappeared, and they stood in the middle of a soccer field. A crowd of dark figures raised their hands.

“Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to our first challenge, a game of soccer!”

Soccer? What the hell?

“The rules are simple. The first team to score a goal wins! However, there will be a slight challenge. It will be the three of you, against perfect clones of the 11 top rated players of all time, in their prime!”

A zipping noise sounded as 11 figures formed to existence on the field one after another. Kanji did not know much about soccer, but many of the figures he recognized — two famous Brazilian players, the top Argentinian player, and the Portuguese legend who won 7 Ballon d’Ors.

“Yuki, do you know how to play soccer?”

“Kick the ball into the goal? What’s there to know?” Yuki scratched her head.

“Eh? But there are rules, aren't there?”

Pinky blinked.

“The first team to score three goals wins. And if you lose, you will die from instant cardiac combustion. Then, let us begin!”

The ball fell from the sky into Kanji’s feet. “W-wait! We don’t know the rules!” He said. The ball was almost instantly snatched away and kicked to the other side of the court. Oh, crap! Kanji turned around, but by the time he did, the buzzer already signalled a goal by one of the Brazilians.

“GOOOOOOOAL!!!!” Justice proclaimed.

How… how are we supposed to beat them?

“Ah, fuck this.” Yuki said as she raised her revolver. Bang. She shot the Portuguese player in the head. More gunshots sounded as she continued shooting one player after another.

“W-what are you doing?!” Justice said, annoyance in his voice, “this is a sports challenge! This is a clear foul! Stop!”

But the enemy team was already dead. Yuki took the ball, which was rolling quietly in the middle of the court, and kicked it. The kick sounded violent, like knocking out a baby. The ball slammed right into the net from half court. The buzzer signaled again.

She really does not miss…

The ball spawned in the middle of the courtroom. Pinky!

Pinky flew and stabbed the ball. Like a bullet, Pinky slammed itself right into the goal. Buzzer.

“Stop! Tsk, this is no good. It’s not fair at all this way!” the sound of a fist slamming against a desk sounded through the speaker, “I know! Let’s change the teams up a bit.”

A black orb floated above the court, near the bot’s goal. What is that thing? The arm of the Portuguese moved just a slight. A bit more.

The bodies dragged on the ground towards the goal. Twisting and rolling. As they arrived, they floated upwards, collapsing together. A ball of meat formed bit by bit, covering the entire goal. Hands around its front formed a pair of lips, and they opened.

“Marzipan!” The meatball roared, making the ground shake.

M-marzipan?

Yuki fired at it, the bullets burying into the flesh.

Yuki started running towards their own goal with the ball.

“Yuki?! What are you doing?” Kanji yelled, not sure whether or not to go after her.

“Stay there!” She yelled back.

Just before she reached their goal, she lifted the ball in the air, and kicked it high on its arc. It flew towards the meatball.

Switch. The meatball covered their own goal, and Yuki stood near the enemy goal. She received the ball mid air, slamming it inside with a bicycle kick.

“What? No, that’s impossible. That power belongs to…” Justice’s voice crackled, “You are not normal humans, are you?”

“Come on! Bring on the next one!” Yuki yelled, a mix of ecstasy and anger in her voice.

“Fine. I see no point wasting our time then. You will immediately skip the most impossible of impossible challenges. Trial by combat.”

Justice appeared above the field, floating. A blue line split him horizontally. He split into two orbs. A red one and a black one.

Darkness. Rays of blue light extending from top to bottom around Kanji.

A small, grassy island. Birds chirped, and the sound of flowing water. The grass swept in the gentle wind. Kanji extended his hand, as an orange butterfly landed on his fingers. Green hills stood in the distance, beyond the river, surrounding the island.

“Well. Well. Well well well. Who do we have here?” A reedy voice sounded behind Kanji, Yuki and Pinky.

They turned.

A red figure, horned, with long nails and a thick long beard stood. Its head was goat-like, all but the beard. And next to it, a mature looking woman in a white dress, a black halo floating above her head, a pair of white wings on her back, and a wide greatsword in her grip.

“Our enemies, it seems.” The woman said gently.

“I’ll take the one with the hammer. I don’t want to hit a girl.” The red figure said.

The red figure snapped his fingers.

The garden disappeared. The floor was an infinite checkerboard, and the darkness extended skywards.

Kanji stood with Pinky and the red figure. Yuki and the woman were nowhere in sight.

What… What is that?

“What is that? Not a very polite way to address anyone.”

Huh?

“... can he read my thoughts? Yes, yes he can. After all, I am Equality. It wouldn’t be fair if it's only you hearing your thoughts, would it?”

Kanji’s eyes widened. “But… I can’t hear your thoughts?”

“Of course not! Your hammer makes you so much stronger than me after all. Why would I need to give you that privilege?”

How am I supposed to fight against that?

“Oh, and I almost forgot…” Equality said as he extended his arm to the side. A grey liquidy substance exited his palm. A copy of Pinky formed right next to him.

“Of course, it wouldn’t be fair to go two on one?”

Kanji’s face went pale.

“So! Let us begin!” Equality sprinted towards Kanji. Grey Pinky flew in a circular path. Pinky flew directly at Grey Pinky, intercepting it.

Kanji swung the hammer at Equality’s head as he approached. He ducked. A punch drove into Kanji’s chin. A rapid swarm of punches followed one after the other. Every time Kanji tried to dodge it, the punch changed course. If he tried to block it, the other hand slipped in. A final blow to the nose threw Kanji sliding on the checkerboard floor. Iron taste in his mouth.

How is it even possible to fight that…

“That’s right, you can’t beat me.” Equality laughed, “The illusion of the strong is, that being strong means you are more powerful than the weak. But that’s completely backwards.”

The Pinkies rolled and struggled, trying to spear one another desperately.

I need to try something else. Pinky! Break!

Pinky’s pupil moved over to Kanji, and he flung himself from his counterpart towards Equality. The spear neared inches from his chest. He leaped out of the way at the last moment. A red blink in his eye. A giant, red sickle dropped from above, penetrating Pinky’s chest and trapping it against the ground.

Pinky!

“One down. And one more to go.”

Kanji hit the ground with the hammer. Checker-colored spikes stabbed towards Equality from the ground. Equality sidestepped every one of them with ease.

Equality raised his hand. A sickle appeared in it, and above him another giant red one appeared. “What? Haven’t you learned yet? You reap what you sow.”

Equality swung his arm downwards and the sickle impaled Kanji’s stomach. His gut hurt like it was being eaten alive by an ant swarm. The sickle backed up, lifting him. He slowly and painfully slid off of the blade. Gasp. Snakes spread across his wound, sewing and sealing his stomach.

“Oh? You know the snake’s technique? No wonder you reek so horribly of strength. It means I’ll just have to go again, and again, until even the snakes will abandon you.” he said as he lifted his sickle once again, ecstasy in his eyes.

I’ll just swap it!

Swap.

Kanji’s hammer was replaced with the sickle. He swung his arm, but the giant red one didn’t appear.

“Huh? I can’t use this thing.” Equality swung the hammer, doing nothing. “I’ll just use this one.”

Swap. Equality swapped the sickle right into his hand.

“What? It’s unfair only for you to have that.”

Stab. Stab. Stab. The sickle stabbed Kanji’s torso again and again.

“You reek of strength…”

The pain was unbearable. All he could focus on is himself. But out of the pain, an unexpected calm emerged. A thought.

Wait…

Why am I trying to be so clever…

When I’m supposed to be stronger?

“You call that being clever!” Three giant sickles appeared above him.

I just need to keep doing my own thing. Inspiration… Inspiration… I know!

The sickles flung forward. Smack. They hit against the bars. Equality and his sickles were surrounded by a steel cage.

“Eh? Where’d you bring that from?” Equality said.

I think this is close to how Justice did it. And now… meatball…

The cage curled inwards, bending and surrounding him, getting smaller and smaller.

“Meatball? What are you thinking about?” Equality said shakily, “Wait, stop! Stop!”

The cage collapsed into a tiny steel ball and clinked as it hit the floor. Blood pooled around it. The gray Pinky disappeared.

Kanji was back in the garden. The angel-like woman flew in the air with her flaming greatsword, exchanging swings with Yuki, who stood out with her Katana, trying to receive her blows.

Yuki yelled as she seemed to notice Kanji. “Kanji-kun! This one is Freedom!”

She’s not using the gun?

As the woman dove towards Yuki, she suddenly teleported, and appeared to be diving from behind her, and impaled her back with the blade.