Souvenir

The flight terminal was crowded with all kinds of people coming and going, speakers blasting all sorts of announcements that didn’t matter to me anymore. It took two hours for Cole and I to fly back from Italy to England, but it was enough time for my body to be sore since I’d done nothing except sit in my seat watching a show on the flight.

Coming back from Florence, the amount of my baggage I carried had increased by one luggage bag because of all the souvenirs I’d bought. So I stepped out of the airport, dual-wielding my luggage bags to the taxi waiting area.

As Cole and I were waiting in line for our ride, I texted Lena that I’d landed and that I was coming over to get my key. I didn’t expect to get an answer right away; it was ten o’clock on a Thursday after all.

Though it was kind of strange that Lena still hadn’t answered the message I’d sent before. It was a message from me telling her that I would be returning soon, plain and simple, and yet there was no sign of her reading it. Was she so busy with her work that she couldn’t spare the time to message me back? If so, I hoped that she would get enough rest.

Soon enough, the line was free, and we got on the taxi after putting our luggage into the trunk. We gave the driver our destination, and he took off.

Forty-five minutes went by, and I was at my destination. I grabbed my stuff from the trunk and walked for another ten minutes, and there it was, Lena’s place. I pressed the doorbell and waited. Soon enough, someone came to answer the door.

Lena poked her head out of the door. Her eyes landed on me and looked left to right.

“Hey–”

I was barely able to utter my greeting before she dragged me inside, closed the door and let out a sigh.

“Why did you do that?”

“N-No reason...”

I tilted my head, failed to guess the reason behind her action, so I brushed it aside for the time being.

“Anyway, how have you been?” I went in for a hug.

“I’ve been good.”

But the hug I received felt insincere with a light touch on my back, in contrast to her usual warm, tight hug.

“I sent you a text before, but I’m not sure if you saw it,” I said as I pulled away from her.

“Oh, uh... I’ma... I’m a little busy... um... with my... work,” she claimed.

I accepted her answer with a nod, despite it sounding like an excuse.

We stood there and stared at each other. It seemed the fact that she didn’t read her message was true, and it appeared that she’d forgotten that she still had the key to my house.

“So, um...” I rubbed the back of my neck to ease the awkward tension. “Can I have my key back?”

“Oh! Right, right.”

Lena went upstairs and came back with my key and returned it to me. I inspected it before I put it in my coat pocket.

“By the way...” I unzipped my bag and pulled out a souvenir I bought for Lena. “I got you a souvenir!”

I handed the box to her, and she received it.

“Thanks...”

And she put it to the side.

Did she not like it? No, she didn’t even look at it properly, so how would she know what it was?

“Aren’t you curious what I got you?”

“Huh? Uh... yeah.”

She looked at the box, pulled the ribbon away and opened the lid to see the contents.

“What is it?”

“It’s a gift set for body care. There's cologne, body cream, bath gel, all in melograno scent, pomegranate in Italian because it’s an Italian brand.” I differentiate each item by pointing them out bottle by bottle.

“It looks nice. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

Still no hint of excitement.

It was weird. Lena was a quiet person, but right now she was unusually quiet. Normally, she would try her best to keep the conversation flowing, but now she responded with short, simple words and stood there awkwardly as if she was forced to be in this conversation.

What was on her mind that made her act like this? Family problem? Work problem? Or maybe me problem somehow?

“Is there something wrong?”

“No! No. Nothing.”

Still, she didn’t speak out. I thought we were close enough for her to open up to me, but maybe it was one-sided feelings on my part. Even though we’d kissed, that didn’t mean she would be open with her problem; physical intimacy and emotional intimacy were two different categories after all.

Seeing her reaction today, it felt like the best choice was to return home for the time being. It was clear that she wasn’t comfortable with being around me, but the reason for it remained unknown. It pained me to see her openly avoid me like this, but I didn’t want to force her to tell me why, so it was better for me to go home; I needed to check on my guppies to see how they were doing too.

“I guess I’m bothering you while you’re working. I’ll get going then.” I zipped up my bag and pulled out the handle. “Call me if you need anything.”

Before I turned away, she grabbed onto the hem of my sleeve. Her eyes filled with worries, but her mouth shut close, keeping the worries from spewing out.

“Never mind... See you later...”

And she let me go.

As soon as I stepped out of the front door, the door behind me closed.

Each step I took away from that house added a weight of worries to my heart, wondering about Lena’s change in her demeanor.

I kept mulling it over as I walked to the bus stop. The moment I arrived, I turned in the direction I came from.

‘The last time I talked with my friends was like this, wasn’t it...’ I couldn’t remember what our last hangout was like. I only remembered getting on the subway and never seeing them again.

Back then, we spent a lot of time together, but one day we came to understand that deep down we didn’t care for each other, only sticking together because that was what we’d always done. So naturally, after we graduated, we stopped talking after a few months.

Would Lena and I turn out like that too? ...No, obviously not. The time we spent together was enjoyable, so why would she suddenly want to leave me? Perhaps the way she acted today was a reflection of my past self, so my brain reached that conclusion because it sensed a pattern.

I shook my head to get rid of that thought as I got on the bus.

It was when I sat down that my phone buzzed.

Cole sent me a message, or rather a link. A link to an article that talked about my “secret romance” with photos attached as evidence.

‘So, that’s the reason for her strange action...’

She was shy, so I understood that she might be shaken up to see herself plastered on the internet without consent.

“I gave you that beanie because I know something like this would happen,” the message from Cole read.

“She was cold. What did you want me to do?”

“Gave her your coat or something.”

“Then I would be cold!”

After the initial playful back and forth, we discussed the way to deal with the situation. For now, we choose to stay silent and watch the reaction of the news publisher, as well as the request for my appearance in an interview.

I put away my phone and hung my head back on the backseat. A long drawn-out sigh left my mouth, but the anxious feeling didn’t go along with it.

That was a mistake on my part. If only I was more aware of my surroundings. If only I hadn’t asked her to kiss me...

While the article was published by an obscure celebrity gossip site, it would soon blow up because people loved the topic of celebrities’ secret relationships, especially when it came to a person of my caliber.

To me, this problem was small, not even worth paying attention to. All I had to do was dodge the question every time it was brought up, and that was it.

In fact, it might work to my advantage because with people wanting to know more about my “secret relationship,” the name Rachel Glintwood would become a keyword that could guarantee clicks and views, so all sorts of news outlets and talk shows would want to get their hands on me.

I was more worried about Lena. Being someone who lived quietly, away from the spotlight, she wouldn’t have the experience on how to deal with finding her presence being plastered on an article without consent.

From the looks of it, she must’ve been scared of all the attention she would get if she were to be identified. Being in a relationship with a famous person brought all sorts of attention, good and bad, and I doubted that she would like it because of her meek personality.

It would be hard for her to be identified, however, with the photos being so low quality, plus her face was fully covered. The only real way they would be able to find her was when they saw her with me.

Wait a second... because of the article, there would surely be paparazzi following me around, knowing that I was holding onto a juicy secret. That would be the most likely way she got discovered.

That explained why she acted so skittish, looking back and forth behind me, pulling me in so she wouldn’t be seen with me. To think that she was able to reach that conclusion. How smart of her.

However, I wanted her to at least tell me in advance that she was planning to do that. Seeing her look at me with such fear in her eyes made me feel like I’d done something very wrong to her, making her avoid me because of that.

I should tell her off for this and also discuss with her what we should do so that she could feel safe.

‘It’s fine. Everything’s gonna be fine.’ I kept telling myself that to soothe my anxiety.

We might have to stay away from each other for a while, but we could still talk on the phone. She might still haven't read or answered my message, but gave it some time, and she would text me back, no doubt.

There was no way she would leave me, especially after all the good times we spent together. All I had to do was wait for her. But for how long, I wonder...