Quirky Quixotic Quest

Saturday. I woke up early, splashed water on my face, and slathered deodorant all over my body. Everything needed to be absolutely perfect.

Not that it was a big deal. Just a date, right?

Who was I kidding? I’d never been on a date before, and I had no idea what to do. Should I dress up in a nice suit? Slick back my hair?

No, we were going to an arcade and a manga café, not a black-tie restaurant. Even so, I spent a lot of time in the morning washing and preening. Looking at myself in the mirror, I thought I looked pretty good. Black slacks, a black T-shirt, and an unbuttoned plaid shirt over that. My hair was neatly combed, so I mussed it a tiny bit.

Popping a breath mint, I left the house. A short train ride later, I made it to our agreed-upon meeting spot. Naturally, I was twenty minutes early. The guy’s supposed to show up early, right? That’s just polite.

I had no idea what I was doing. Everything I knew about dating I learned from anime and manga. My dad wasn’t even around to give me an awkward lecture and outdated advice.

Good thing I got there early too, because Blooming Flame Blossom arrived shortly afterward. Like always, I didn’t see her approach.

“Hey, Sei. You’re here early. As pumped as I am to hang out?” By now, you’d think I’d be used to her throwing her arm across my shoulder, but I still tensed up. There was just something about her that always put me on edge.

Even so, I was looking forward to seeing her in cute clothes. We were on a date after all. Wasn’t that part of the charm, getting to see a girl wearing something besides the school uniform? To my dismay, she was dressed in her bright red robes. She looked no different than when I saw her during club. What kind of girl would come to a date in battle clothes?

Then again, she obviously wasn’t a normal girl. I shouldn’t have expected anything.

“Something like that. Should we hit the arcade first?”

“Lead the way, my man.”

Her eyes sparkled as we entered the arcade. “Whoa, there’s so many games in here. Hey, check it out, guns!” She ran over to a lightgun cabinet and pulled out both pistols. “Bam! Bam! Bam! Hey, what the hell? They’re not working.”

Had she seriously never been to an arcade before?

“You gotta pay first. Here.” Taking my phone out, I held it up to the payment terminal and put in a few credits. “It’s for two people. We each take one gun.”

“Yeah, let’s do this.” Handing me one of the pistols, she took careful aim at the screen. When the game started, she fired away. “Boom! Headshot. Did you see that? Sheesh, how many bad guys are there? Hey, what gives? I’m out of ammo. This gun doesn’t have enough ammo for all these dudes.”

“Point the gun up and pull the trigger to reload.”

“What the heck? That’s not how guns work.”

Despite her enthusiasm, she wasn’t very good. My credits held out just long enough to get her through the first level. Thankfully, when the screen faded to black, she thought it was over. Dropping the pistol back into its holder, she literally ran to the back of the arcade.

“Cool mechas! How’s this one work?”

“It’s connected to the Internet. We fight against people playing in other arcades.”

“Let’s smoke ‘em.” Taking a seat, she immediately began pressing all the buttons. Seemed she still hadn’t figured out how payment worked, so it once again fell to me. “Oh, I get it, This is how you choose your mech. What do these numbers mean?”

“The mechs with higher numbers are stronger, but you’ll lose more points when you die.

“Then we should pick the better mechs and just not die.”

“Doesn’t work like that. No matter how good you are, you’ll end up dying more than once.”

“In that case, I’ll choose the weakest one and kill them a bunch.”

Before I could explain the problem with that strategy, she locked in her pick. The timer was nearly out, so I picked a mid-tier mech.

“Got you now!” As soon as the match started, she rushed off toward the nearest enemy. Then, a second later, she laughed. “You were right, Sei. You really do die a lot in this game.”

⁂

“That was so much fun!”

It was late afternoon by the time we left the arcade. Blooming Flame Blossom had insisted on checking out every cabinet and asking how they worked. Once she grasped how to pay, she started doing it on her own. Good thing too. I definitely would have run out of money halfway through.

She didn’t even blink at all the money she was spending, though.

Just like when we entered the arcade, her eyes lit up when we walked into the manga café. This time though, it was as though I could see flames reflected in them. “That’s a lot of paper,” she whispered. “I bet it would burn very easily.”

“Maybe we should eat somewhere else.”

“Relax.” She elbowed me. “I’m not a psychopath. I wouldn’t do something like that. Besides, I love manga.”

Wandering further into the store, I noticed someone familiar working behind the counter. “Roshiki. Good afternoon.”

“Oh, Seishin! Welcome.”

“Oh hey, I remember you,” Blooming Flame Blossom said. “How come you’re working here? Do you like manga too?”

“My family owns the place. My grandpa moved to Japan because he loved manga and wanted to open his own cafe. But yes, I like it too. I can recommend some, if you’d like.”

“Please do,” I said. “I’d appreciate that.”

“OK. Right now, we have a special where you can each get two hours for one hundred yen. Are you registered with us?”

“It’s my first time, actually. Do you take school ID?”

“Yes.”

While I fumbled for my wallet, Blooming Flame Blossom summoned hers with a flourish of her wrist. From my angle, I couldn’t peep her legal name, but Roshiki’s eyes went wide with recognition. “Is there anything else I can get you?”

Blooming Flame Blossom mimicked me in ordering a sandwich and drink. Then we made our way to the open seating area. Along the way, I grabbed a few manga off a shelf without even looking. We sat down at a table and I flipped one open.

“Hey, let me borrow that.” Blooming Flame Blossom grabbed a manga from the top of my pile. Only too late did I see the title.

I Have a Crush on My Tomboy Childhood Friend With Middle Schooler Syndrome, but She Treats Me Like Her Pal

The girl on the cover even looked like Blooming Flame Blossom, with long red hair and eyes that burned with passion. The, er, biggest difference was the size of her chest.

“This is hilarious.” Blooming Flame Blossom’s voice was filled with excitement, like she was a child getting away with something behind her parents’ backs. “Check it out. The main character dresses like you.”

Great. Both of the characters resembled us. Could it get any more awkward? Then I looked at the page she was holding out. Sure enough, he was wearing a similar outfit. But he was also drawn very small in the corner of the page.

The heroine was front and center. More accurately, her massive rack was. The two of them were in a manga café (why, oh why?), and the main character had tripped, splashing soda all over her.

“Why do they have a manga like this just sitting out on the shelf?” I yelped.

“I know, right? Kinda makes you feel like an adult, hanging out in a mature place like this.”

That was her takeaway? Maybe it was better than getting embarrassed over it. Or perhaps she was putting on a front so things didn’t get awkward between us.

She was still reading it when Roshiki brought our food. The elf looked from her to me, as if she wanted to ask a question, but I just shrugged.

Setting the manga aside, we ate our lunch in silence and carried the dishes to the return station. I took my eyes off Blooming Flame Blossom for a second, and next thing I knew, she was striking up a conversation with Roshiki.

“Do you have the next volume? I really wanna see what happens next.”

“I don’t think it’s out yet, but if you like that one…”

Turning away in embarrassment, I saw a young man in a sharp suit stop in front of the door and peer inside.

“Is that Yuumondou?” I asked. “What’s he doing here?”

“Oh shit, we gotta hide.” Blooming Flame Blossom grabbed me by the sleeve and pulled me toward the back of the café.

“You can use one of the private rooms,” Roshiki said. “There’s nobody else here anyway.”

Blooming Flame Blossom pushed me into a private room and closed the door behind us. “I was having such a good time, too,” she whispered. “Why’d he have to show up?”

“Forgive me if this is a stupid question, but why do we have to hide from him?”

“If he catches us in a place like this, he’ll tell our parents about it. I don’t know about you, but mine are super strict. They would not approve of me reading lewd manga, and if they learned I was spending my free time alone with a boy, they’d put me on an even tighter leash.”

“Then why’d you invite me out today, if they’re that strict?”

“This is going to sound silly, but I was always jealous of the close friendships boys form with each other. Girls can be close too, but boys are so much more straightforward with each other. They do what they want, say what they mean, and when they get mad at each other, they duke it out and make up afterward. I wanted that for myself.”

After hearing an explanation like that I couldn’t blame her. I understood where she was coming from, but…

“Male friendships aren’t as simple as you make them out to be.”

“I know that, but haven’t you ever wanted something similar? Our friendship could be like that.”

“When you put it like that, it sounds nice. I guess we could give it a try.” Raising my hand, I offered her a fist bump. The smile that appeared on her face was the biggest I’d seen all day.

“Friends for life.” She slammed her fist into mine so hard it hurt.

At that moment, Roshiki opened the door. “Your brother left. All clear.”

Hold on a second. “Your brother?! If Yuumondou’s your brother, that means you’re…”

Why hadn’t I seen it before? Was it because her hair and eyes were different, or because she acted like a completely different person? When I looked closely at her face though, there was no doubt.

“Oh ho ho ho ho,” she laughed nervously. “I thought you realized. This is certainly awkward.” A second later, she teleported away.

That was how my first date--which wasn’t really a date--ended.