19-The 100-Yen Hostage!

[Scene: The Supermarket Parking Lot]

Chi-chan was walking alone, humming a tune. She was holding a 100-yen coin which she found under the vending machine.

Chi-chan: "I will buy one a Premium Chocolate Ball. I'm so rich."

Suddenly, a rusty white van screeched to a halt next to her.
The side door slid open.
Two men in ski masks appeared. Kidnapper A (Tall) and Kidnapper B (Short).

Kidnapper A: "Hey, little girl. Want some free candy?"

Chi-chan stopped and  looked at the cheap lollipop in his hand.

Chi-chan: "What Flavor?"

Kidnapper A: "Uh... Grape?"

Chi-chan: "Trash! I demand Matcha or Salted Caramel!"

Kidnapper B: "She’s bratty! Definitely a rich heiress! GRAB HER!"

They threw a jute sack over Chi-chan.

Chi-chan: "HEY! THIS FABRIC IS LOW THREAD COUNT! IT ITCHES! UNHAND ME!"

SLAM. The van sped away.

[Scene: The Abandoned Warehouse]

Chi-chan was tied to a chair in the middle of a dark room. The single lightbulb swayed above her.
Her snake tail, Hebi-o, was also tied up (with a rubber band).

Kidnapper A: "Alright, brat. We know your parents are loaded. Look at these clothes! A silk Chinese dress! Very fancy."

Chi-chan: "It’s 100% Polyester from Don Quijote! Now, untie me! My circulation is cutting off! If my leg falls asleep, I will sue you for medical damages!"

Kidnapper B: "Boss... she’s not scared. She’s critiquing the rope knots."

Chi-chan: "This is a Granny Knot. Amateur. Use a Double Fisherman’s Loop if you want to hold a Chimera! Do you even have job experience?"

Kidnapper A: "Shut up! We are calling your parents!"

He grabbed Chi-chan’s phone (stolen from her pocket). He scrolled to contacts.
There was only one contact: "SCARY LANDLORD."

Kidnapper A: "Dialing..."

[Scene: The Shop - Tea Time]

Rinka was sipping tea. The phone rang.
She picked up.

Rinka: "Antiquities Shop. We don't buy used underwear. Goodbye."

Kidnapper A: "WAIT! DON'T HANG UP! We have your girl! The blonde tiger-brat!"

Rinka: "Oh."
(Sip)
Rinka: "You can keep her."

Kidnapper A: "Hah?! No! This is a kidnapping! We demand a ransom! 10 Million Yen!"

Rinka: "Ten Million? She’s not worth ten yen. She eats three times her body weight and breaks furniture for fun. Honestly, you’re doing me a favor. Make sure you feed her."

CLICK. (Rinka hung up).

[Scene: The Warehouse]

Kidnapper A: "She... she hung up."

Chi-chan: "SHE WHAT?! THAT WITCH! CALL HER BACK! TELL HER I AM WORTH BILLIONS! TELL HER I KNOW WHERE SHE HIDES HER DIARY!"

Kidnapper B: "Boss... the snake on her butt is looking at me. It’s... smoking a cigarette?"

Hebi-o (Snake Tail): "Got a lighter, buddy?"

Kidnapper B: "GYAAAAAH! THE SNAKE SPOKE! IT’S A DEMON!"

Chi-chan: "Finally, you notice! Now, I am bored. Entertainment time!"

Chi-chan flexed her muscles.
SNAP.
The cheap ropes snapped like wet pasta.

Chi-chan: "You dare tie the Nue with hemp? I tear steel with my teeth (no she can't)!"

Kidnapper A: "She’s loose! Get the taser!"

Chi-chan: "Taser? I EAT LIGHTNING (no she don't)!"

Chi-chan jumped onto the table.
Chi-chan: "Secret Technique: TIGER-FANG-CROTCH-KICK!"

WHAM.
Chi-chan drop-kicked Kidnapper A directly in the "family jewels."

Kidnapper A: (High pitched squeak) "My... legacy..."
(He collapsed).

Kidnapper B: "Monster! Stay back!"

Chi-chan: "I’m hungry! You promised me candy! WHERE IS IT?!"

Chi-chan pounced on Kidnapper B, biting his arm.

Kidnapper B: "OW! GET HER OFF! SHE HAS RABIES!"

[The "Rescue"]

Suddenly, the warehouse wall exploded.
CRASH!

Poko burst through the brick wall.
 She had transformed into a Giant Police Car (with legs). A mecha-police-car-tanuki.

Poko (Mecha-Car Form): "WEE-WOO WEE-WOO! JUSTICE HAS ARRIVED!"

Kidnapper B: "A TRANSFORMER?! WHAT IS HAPPENING?!"

Poko (Mecha-Car Form): "Chi-chan! I came to save you! ...Wait, why are you biting the bad guy?"

Chi-chan: "Poko, grab them! Shake them until money and candy falls out!"

Rinka walked in through the hole in the wall, holding her Iron Fan.
She looked at the scene:
Kidnapper A was crying on the floor.
Kidnapper B was being chewed on by Chi-chan.
Poko was a car with legs, honking loudly.

Rinka: "...."

Kidnapper A: (Crawling to Rinka) "Please... save us... take her back... we’ll pay you!"

Rinka: "Pay me?"

Kidnapper A: "Take it! Take all our wallet money! Just get this demon child away from us!"
(He threw his wallet at Rinka).

Chi-chan: "Wait! I demand a pay! I did the work!"

Rinka: "I see."

Rinka picked up the wallet. She counted the cash. 5,000 yen.

Rinka: "Request accepted. I will remove the pest."

Rinka walked over to Chi-chan.
She grabbed Chi-chan by the back of her neck (like a kitten).

Chi-chan: "Let go! I haven't finished robbing them! They have a van! We can sell the van!"

Rinka: "We are leaving."

Kidnapper B: "Thank you! Thank you, scary lady!"

[Epilogue: The Walk Home]

Chi-chan: "Rinka... you hung up on them. You said I wasn't worth 10 yen."

Rinka: "It’s a negotiation tactic."

Chi-chan: "Liar! You were going to leave me!"

Rinka: "If I left you, who would I use to test my new cursed chainsaws?"

Chi-chan: "That’s not comforting! Also, I’m hungry. Buy me the chocolate ball."

Rinka: "Use your own money."

Chi-chan: "The kidnappers took my 100 yen coin!"

Rinka: "Then starve."

Chi-chan: "RINKAAAAA! I HATE YOU!"