(Volume 3 Chapter 8: The cost of memories)( Volume 3 Chapter 9: The cost of memories II)

Father name: (Satoshi Fujimoto).....

After the talk with satoshi, shin walked toward his room...

................................................................

After entering his room he turned off the light...

 It just made the Lead Wall in his mind feel taller, colder, and more suffocating.

Narrator: (The Lead Wall is the physical manifestation of his amnesia, the barrier of the past)

 As he collapsed onto the bed, the silence of the mansion felt like a physical weight pressing down on his chest

 He could still feel the phantom sensation of the Father’s punch on his jaw a dull throb that felt more real than anything else in his life.

Shin  there in the pitch black, his eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling he couldn't see. 

For the first time in a year, the bed didn't feel warm.

 It felt like a stone slab. 

He tried to pull the covers up, but the fabric reminded him of the Maid he had just discarded.

 It reminded him of the strawberry shampoo he had just turned into the scent of ozone and death.

He stared at his hands in the dark.

 These were the hands that had just turned a Goddess to ash.

 The hands that had terrified the only people who ever gave him a name but because he didn't remember this he feel like he had did something worst in past....

Shin’s Internal Monologue: (Why does the air feel so heavy? 

 I’m in a house.

 I have a bed.

 I have a family... No. I don't. 

I told them I would kill them. 

I told her to clean the floor. I am... I am the worst...

But, still I will got what I wanted. 

 I have the promise of my memories. In thirty days, i would remember everything... so why does my chest feel like it's being crushed by a mountain?)

He closed his eyes, trying to find the garden in his mind, but for the first time, he couldn't see the blue flowers. 

He could only see the look of pure, primal fear in Yui Akari’s eyes when he had called her Maid.

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to force the vision of the Blur Girl to appear. 

He needed her.

 He needed to justify what he had just done to Yui and the Father.

Shin (Whispering into the dark): (Please... show me your face. 

Tell me it was worth it. 

Tell me that breaking them was the only way to find you...)

But the Blur Girl remained silent.

 For the first time, even her voice was gone.

 There was only the sound of his own heart, beating with a steady, rhythmic guilt.

The Morning After...

The sun rose over the mansion, but the light didn't seem to reach the dining room.

Kaito Arisaka (The Father) sat at the head of the table, his face looking ten years older.

 He was staring at his coffee, his knuckles still bruised from the punch he landed on Shin the night before.

 Beside him, the young boy sat quietly, poking at his eggs, sensing that the Big Brother he loved had been replaced by a ghost.

Then, the door opened.

Yui Akari walked in. 

She wore her uniform perfectly.

 Her hair was tied back tight too tight. 

Her face was a mask of professional indifference. 

The nosebleed was gone, the wound on her leg was healed, but her eyes were like dead glass.

Yui: (Breakfast is served, Master Arisaka. I have prepared the tea exactly as you like it.)

Kaito Arisaka: (Akari... so you are now going to act like before but i don't want this, please. Sit down. Eat with us.)

Yui: (I am the maid, sir. It is not my place to sit. I have much work to do today... a lot of floors to clean.)

She spoke the word clean with a gentle, tragic sadness that hung in the air like dust.

 When Shin entered, she didn't look away this time; instead, she forced a painful, shaky smile—one that looked ready to shatter into a thousand jagged pieces.

He looked normal again—the abyssal eyes were gone 

He looked at Yui, his lips trembling, wanting to say Good morning, wanting to play like they used to.

Shin said: (Good morning, how are you feeling....) 

But Yui looked up. 

She stepped aside, keeping her head bowed..

Yui: (Oh, Shin... you’ve finally woken up. I thought perhaps you’d sleep for two years. 

You really should learn a thing or two from your teacher—oh, wait. I forgot.

 You’re not my student anymore, are you? You’re just my... friend now. Right?

Ahhh)  Yui said, while giving a painful smile fighting to her mind, body to smile and don't cry....

Yui: (ok then let me bring some things that are nedded )

She laughed, but the sound was hollow and cold, like a winter wind howling through a graveyard.

 To Shin, the sound felt like a spark of hope; he allowed himself to believe she had forgiven him, blissfully ignorant of the fact that she was drowning in the blood behind her eyes.

Shin sat at his usual spot, but he felt like he was sitting a thousand miles away. 

He looked at Yui, who placed plates on table

Shin’s heart felt like it was being squeezed by cold iron. 

//He forced his facial muscles to move to mimic the expression of the man who had played pillow fights and laughed over strawberry bubbles.

He looked at Kaito Arisaka, then at the boy, and finally toward Yui. 

He let out a small, hollow chuckle that didn't reach his eyes. 

His lips curved upward into a smile, but it was shaky, fragile, and looked like it might shatter at any moment.

Shin: (Hey... the eggs look good today, don't they? 

And, you are right, I think... I think I oversleep a bit. 

My head feels a little heavy.)

He waited for a response. A joke. A scolding from Yui about being lazy. Anything.

(Really? So you have accepted your mistake....

You really are stupid...

Haaahha) Yui let out a small, hollow chuckle that didn't reach her eyes, her lips curved upward into a smile, but it was shaky, fragile, and looked like it might shatter at any moment.

Yui smile didn't fade; it just became more painful.

It was the smile of a person standing in a burning building, pretending they are fine...

Shin: (Arisaka-san... after breakfast, do you want to finish that game of chess? 

I think I finally figured out your strategy. 

And Akari... if you’re going to the market later, I can carry the bags like before what do you say ?)

He whispered the last part, his voice cracking. The smile was still there—a jagged, porcelain mask.

Yui said: (Really? after so many days you asked this now? Ok but remember you would have to carry lot of bags than before after all, you have you are going to recover your memories 

so you absoultely need to make some memories to not regret later right?) again smile didnt fade but it just became more painful..

Shin couldn"t saw her sadness instead he thought yui has forgot everything..

He was now relaxed....

(Really? Thank god, let spend the time we had to end)

Kaito Arisaka’s hand tightened around his glass. 

The glass didn't just break; it shattered into jagged shards, cutting into his palm. 

Drops of crimson blood dripped onto the white tablecloth, mirroring the stain from the night before. 

He didn't even flinch.

And then he said a lie,

kaito Ariaka said: ( I am sorry about this.... 

i remembered my wife words again its so painful to remember something i couldn't save that time...

Please don't mind me i am going to treat my hand then walk toward my work)

After breakfast, the tradition continued—or at least, the ghost of it did. 

Shin and Yui walked toward the market. 

In the past, this walk was filled with teasing and shared snacks. 

Today, the silence was a physical barrier between them.

The market was bustling.

 People laughed, vendors shouted, and the smell of fresh bread filled the air. 

Yui moved through the crowd like a puppet on strings. 

She smiled at the grocer, she haggled for vegetables, and she laughed at a joke a baker made—but her eyes remained dead, like glass beads. 

Shin followed her, carrying the bags, trying to catch her gaze. 

Every time he stepped closer, she stepped away, maintaining a professional distance that felt like a thousand miles.

They returned to the mansion, their arms full of groceries. 

As they entered the courtyard, the air turned frigid. 

Eslimya was there, a silhouette of malice against the mansion walls. 

With a flick of her fingers, gravity reversed. 

Yui was hoisted into the air, screaming as she was flung toward the stone tiles from a height that would surely break her.

Shin reacted instantly. 

He dropped the bags, his speed a blur. 

He was there—underneath her. Yui closed her eyes, bracing for the impact, but then felt the familiar, strong grip of Shin’s arms.

Voom. 

She stopped mid-air, cradled against his chest. 

A small, relieved smile began to spread across Yui’s face. 

She opened her eyes, ready to thank him, ready to believe that he still cared—

But Shin wasn't looking at her.

 His eyes were wide, glowing with a frantic, desperate hunger. 

The Blur Girl had appeared just a few feet away, reaching out to him.

Without a word, without even a glance at the girl he held, Shin’s face twisted with obsession. 

He didn't just let Yui go; he threw her aside with a violent, careless shove, as if she were a piece of trash blocking his path.

Yui hit the cobblestones hard. The thud was followed by the sickening sound of snapping bone.

 She skidded across the courtyard, her white uniform tearing and soaking instantly with crimson as she crashed into the stone fountain.

Eslimya laughed, snapping her fingers. 

The illusion vanished.

Shin stood in the center of the courtyard, his hands outstretched toward nothing. 

The silence that followed was deafening, broken only by the wet, ragged sound of Yui’s breathing.

 He turned his head slowly, his movements robotic. 

His gaze fell upon the fountain.

There lay Yui.

Her body was bent at a wrong angle, her market bags scattered around her like fallen petals. The red was spreading fast.

Shin: (No...)

He scrambled toward her on his knees, his porcelain skin turning deathly pale. He reached out to touch her face, but his fingers—the same ones that had just discarded her—were now stained with her lifeblood.

Eslimya: (Look at you, Shin. You chased a shadow and traded a soul. Tell me... was the air you just hugged worth the red on your hands?)

Tell me... was she worth the red on your hands?)

Shin didn't answer. 

He didn't even look at Eslimya. 

His gaze was locked on Yui’s closed eyes.

Shin (A broken, guttural whisper): (Akari? Akari, wake up. I... I didn't mean to. 

The girl... she was right there! 

She was finally there!)

Eslimya: (There was no one there, you pathetic creature. 

There was only your own obsession. 

You chose the ghost over the girl. 

You are a grave-robber of your own heart.)

Shin’s vision blurred. The "Lead Wall" in his mind began to crack, but not with memories—with pure, unadulterated regret. 

He pulled her limp body into his arms. 

The silence of the mansion was deafening. 

He used his healing magic and now she was perfectly alright like nothing even happend...

But, he realized then that he couldn't fix something with his powers. 

He could heal the body, but he couldn't heal the fact that he had prioritized a phantom over her life.

Eslimya: (What a scum...)

Shin’s healing magic flared. 

In seconds, Yui was whole again. 

But the trauma was just beginning.

For the next two hours—the time Yui usually spent resting—Eslimya turned the courtyard into a slaughterhouse of the mind. 

Every time Shin moved toward Yui, a new illusion of the Blur Girl appeared.

 And every time, Shin’s instinct won.

He watched, paralyzed by his own obsession, as a clone of Yui’s mother appeared and began to methodically torture her. 

He heard the screams. 

He saw the nails being pulled, the fingers being severed one by one.

 But as soon as the Blur Girl flickered in the corner of his eye, he turned his back on the screaming girl to chase the ghost.

When the illusion ended, he would run back, frantic and crying, to heal Yui’s mangled body.

Shin: (I’m sorry! I’m sorry, Akari! I’ll fix it!)

But as soon as the Blur Girl appeared again?

  He left her.

Over and over. 

Ten times. Twenty times. 

He became a doctor who only fixed the patient so she could be tortured again.

By the time Eslimya grew bored and retreated to her room, Yui was perfectly healed. 

Not a scar remained on her skin.

 But as she stood up to begin her evening chores, her eyes were no longer glass—they were a void.

Eslimya said: ((You don't even deserve to be called a man or rather a human..)

and then she walked toward the mansion to her room..

Shin carried yui who was not awake yet

And walked toward her room to place her on bed...

Shin laid her down on the bed. 

She looked peaceful, her breathing even, as if she were simply taking an afternoon nap.

Her memories was still there but her injuiries wasn't 

But Shin knew the truth. 

He stood by the bedside, his hands—which had just minutes ago been stained with her blood—now trembling as he tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

Shin (A whisper that didn't even reach his own ears): (Why did I reach for the blur? 

She wasn't real... she was never there. 

I am standing in a room with a girl I almost killed, and I can't even remember the color of the eyes I chose over her.)

He looked at his own reflection in the vanity mirror. 

He didn't see the Gentleman who liked strawberry shampoo. 

He saw the God who stood over the ashes of his own humanity.

Suddenly, a shadow stretched across the floor. 

He didn't turn around; he knew who it was.

Kaito Arisaka (Voice deathly quiet): (She’s breathing. That’s good. That’s very... convenient, isn't it, Shin?)

Shin turned. Kaito was standing in the doorway, his face pale, his hands clenched so tightly that his knuckles were white. 

He had seen it all—the fall, the throw, the illusion that Shin chased while his maid fell to her death.

Shin: (Arisaka-san... I... the vision...)

Kaito: (Don't. )

Kaito whispered: (Don't speak her name. Don't speak about your visions

At least for now)

Kaito stepped into the room, his eyes scanning Yui’s sleeping form. 

He looked at Shin..

Shin: (I can fix it. I’ll make it up to her. I’ll—)

Kaito: (You healed her body its great isn't it?

thank you for it...

 now you can rest in your room you are looking very tired...)

Without a hesitation shin walked toward his room with just thought of blur girl...

Kaito whispered: (shin....you healed her....but you killed her trust. And frankly? I think you killed yourself today, too. Look at you. You’re a ghost haunting your own life.

I will never give you the blame for this or not that vision after all, i  was once like that.....

But, still the way you are treating yui is just~~~)

After entering his room he lay on his bed and then,

(Was that girl really important for me so much that i destroyed my connection with a girl who i have crush on?

Yes, i realized this eight months ago that  I want to hold yui , i want to feed her food, i want to have the family with her

and make her believe i would never leave her ~~~

But, i know i would leave her not because of blur girl but because of the memories i would recieve once again......

Blur girl is just a girl who would help me recovered my memories of the things i wanted to do so bad and also a girl who i love very much)

He didn't fall asleep till the night...

And then after so much time just laying on bed with nothing in his mind..

He finally stood and then begin walking toward the yui room....

And then he used his power to got into her room..

But, this time not in half sleepiness but fully awoken....

After entering a locked room which was completely dark he could saw yui awoke...

Then he used his power to make her sleep....

And he begin walking toward her and then knelled beside the bed of her..

His hand trembling as he tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

He again used his powers to make him invisible this time...

He hold her hand and begin pat her head...

He was numb to his own emotion, oblivious to the feelings he held for yui~~~a void that wasn't just for her, but also for blur girl as well...

He fall asleep after some hours with holding the head of yui and pat her head...

Next morning, yui awake and feel something on her hand and also something holding her hand..

She couldn't see shin

Shin eyes suddenly opened, he leave her hand which he was holding and got in his room as fast he could...

Yui suddenly feel light now so she thought of it as nothing important...

Like always she had mask of happiness on her face but inside her was only pain....

She saw everyone with a smile on her face and played with shin as they both played before....

And then while they were walking like always...

Eslmiya standing where she was yesterday....

Eslimya smiled again..

Then she made illusion of blur girl like yesterday

And then also created a clone of yui mother walking toward yui with knife in her hand to stab in yui stomatch while shin choose blur girl over yui....

He heard many screams of yui behind him but ignored them as he walked toward blur girl...

And after some time blur girl illusion was once again disappeared..

As he moved his eyes behind him..

The courtyard was no longer a place of stone and water; it had become a factory of red.

For the second hour, Eslimya didn’t just use force—she used Identity. 

As Shin walked toward the shimmering, fake light of the Blur Girl, a clone of Yui’s mother appeared behind the real Yui.

 The clone didn't speak. It simply gripped Yui’s hand with a strength that shouldn't exist.

Yui watched in silent horror as the Mother began to dismantle her. 

One by one, her fingernails were peeled back.

 Then the fingers.

 Then the hands.

 The pain was a white-hot sun, but Yui’s eyes were locked on Shin’s back. 

He was only ten feet away, walking toward a shadow.

When the illusion of the Blur Girl flickered out, Shin would turn back. 

He would see the pieces of the girl he once played with scattered across the fountain.

 He would run to her, his face a mask of frantic, lying grief, and use his power to bond her bones back together.

Yui (Voice cracking, blood bubbling in her throat): (Shin... don't worry... I a—)

Her words were cut short.

  Thrum. 

The Blur Girl appeared again behind Shin.

Without a second thought, 

Shin’s head snapped toward the ghost.

 He didn't even let Yui finish her sentence. He placed her aside—literally pushing her healing body away—and chased the light.

This time, Eslimya changed the game. 

The clone that appeared to torture Yui wasn't her mother. 

It was a Clone of Shin.

Yui had to watch the face she loved—the Gentleman face—look at her with cold, empty eyes as it began to tear her apart again. 

The psychological weight was heavier than the physical pain. 

By the time the two hours were up, Yui had died and been remade dozens of times.

 To her, Shin was lower than an insect.

Eslimya: (What a disgusting creature. 

You don’t even wait for her to stop screaming before you turn your back.

 I’ve destroyed her rest, her mind, and her heart... and you helped me do it.)

She walked away, leaving them in the silence of the setting sun.

Yui stood up. Her uniform was clean thanks to Shin’s magic, but she could still feel the phantom sensation of her eyes being plucked out. She didn't look at Shin. 

She didn't ask for a hand. She simply adjusted her apron and began to walk toward the mansion.

Yui moved through the mansion like a ghost.

 She scrubbed the floors where her own blood had been just minutes before. 

Her hands were steady, but her heart was dead.

Satoshi Fujimoto stood in the hallway, watching her. 

He saw the way she didn't flinch when Shin walked past. 

He saw the way she smiled—that jagged, painful smile—whenever someone looked at her.

Satoshi: (Yui... stop. The sun is down. Go to your room. I’ll finish the cleaning.)

Yui: (It is my duty, Master Satoshi. I am being paid well. 

A maid does not leave her post just because she is... tired.)

She used the word tired to cover the fact that her soul had been shredded into pieces.

That night, Shin did what he always did. 

He used his powers to slip through her locked door. 

She was awoke...

Shin used his power to for fall her sleep....

He sat by her bed, invisible, and reached out to pat her head. 

He wanted to feel the warmth of the girl he had let die twenty times that day.

 He wanted to pretend he was still the Gentleman who cared for her.

Shin (Whispering into the dark): (I’m here, Akari. I’m still here.)

The cycle had become a grotesque rhythm.

 For twenty days, Shin had been a spectator to his own betrayal, a man who built a sanctuary for a ghost while letting the living rot. 

He would pat Yui’s hair in the dark, whispering, "I’m here," a hollow lie that tasted like ash, while by day, he abandoned her just to walk toward blur girl.

But today was the twenty-ninth day. 

The final countdown.

Eslimya appeared, her yellow eyes gleaming with the anticipation of one final, glorious shredding of Yui’s soul. 

She conjured the illusion of the Blur Girl, a soft, beckoning light in the distance, and simultaneously summoned a clone of Yui’s relative, a blade glinting in the pale sunlight.

Yui didn't scream this time. 

She didn't even flinch. 

She stood with her eyes fixed on the horizon, her face a desert of emotion. 

She had died so many times that the concept of fear had withered away.

The relative’s clone lunged, hand reaching for Yui’s throat.

Shin, as always, began to drift toward the Blur Girl. 

But as his fingers brushed the empty air of the illusion, he stopped.

 He turned. 

He saw the blade inches from Yui’s skin.

He didn't cry. 

He moved with the terrifying, fluid speed of a predator. 

He caught the relative’s clone by the wrist.

The look on Shin’s face was not the Gentleman’s smile, nor was it the hollow confusion of the Blur Girl’s devotee.

 It was Abyssal.

His pupils bled out into his irises, turning his eyes into twin, weeping pits of black nothingness.

 His jaw set in a line of such absolute, bone-chilling fury that even Eslimya took a step back, her smirk faltering.

He didn't just kill the clone; he erased it.

 He tightened his grip until the clone’s hand turned to dust, then with a flick of his other hand, he tore the illusion of the relative of yui apart as if it were nothing more than wet parchment.

The garden fell into a deathly, ringing silence.

"Akari," he whispered, his voice trembling with a raw, broken vulnerability. "I... I saw. I finally saw."

Yui looked at him.

 There was no relief in her expression. 

There was no joy. 

She stared at him with eyes that had seen their own entrails dragged across the stone too many times to count. 

She simply blinked, her face a mask of porcelain perfection.

She turned away, her movements steady and devoid of life. 

She didn't acknowledge his protection. 

She didn't care that he had finally chosen her. 

To her, the man who had let her die twenty times was already gone; there was only a stranger standing in his place.

"The tea will be cold if we stay out here, Master Shin," she said, her voice completely devoid of melody.

She began walking back toward the mansion, her footsteps silent. 

Shin stood alone in the center of the garden, the crushing weight of twenty days of carnage pressing down on him. 

He had saved her today, but he realized with a jolt of pure terror that he had left her soul in the courtyard, lying in pieces that he could no longer heal.

Tomorrow, the memories return. 

And Shin, finally realized that the price of those memories is the one person who gave him a name.

Last day.........

The morning......

Shin opened his eyes and begin walking with no emotion or expression.....

Shin didn't informed anyone 

He just walked toward eslimya....

And then,
(So, are you ready? If yes then let's go in)

There was a portal to some other place........

Shin said : (Yeah, let's go bitch 

I want my those fucking memories back right now i am tired...)

Eslimya and shin walked in the portal...

Volume 3 chapter 8 & 9 ended

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