Realization 4

Someone like Kazama doesn’t just disappear. Maybe he’d get suspected, expelled, get sick, or whatever. But a guy like him doesn’t vanish in the air. And certainly not after an argument with one of the top students of the school. Which… Okay, maybe it has nothing to do with it. But the coincidence is alarming.

Scratch that, it feels too evidently related to be a coincidence! What the hell is going on?!

It’s not like I have any proof, or that Akamine has done anything but just do her own thing. She might have started dedicating more time to Kamishiro, but nothing really changed.

Kazama got on people’s nerves all the time, regardless of who they are or what they’re about. It’s not like Akamine is special in that regard either. The guy just hated a lot of things, and most people have some things going on. If that makes sense. It’s an understandable Venn diagram that I might be too stressed out to properly explain. But the point is that Kazama’s attitude was nothing new, he was scary, and so most people saw him at his worst.

Doesn’t help that I am already thinking about him in the past tense but…

“Hey, watch it!” While feeling like I’ve run out of time a week after Kazama’s mysterious vanishment, school life has already changed. The dudes scattered, unwilling to do their usual shenanigans without Kazama to give them a sense of toughness.

Meaning that, for the guys who Kazama represents a dangerous person, now the troublemakers are nothing but kicked dogs trying to go unnoticed.

“Do you have a problem? Are you gonna run to daddy, now that big bro isn’t here to protect you?” Tch. Even randos throw out their real feelings at us now. It’s hysterical that they would definitely not dare if Kazama was here. But I can’t laugh at the witless confession here.

Smack!

I shove the guy away, let him trip and fall on his butt. If he wants to act tough in front of everyone, then let him stand up and try to shove me back.

“Piss off, bastard. Or call a teacher to protect your sorry ass. I don’t care.” It’s a jungle out there, and I can’t have random people thinking that they can measure up to me. Not when they wouldn’t stand up for themselves under different circumstances.

No, forget that. I can already picture these ‘different circumstances’: I went through them before time rewound or whatever. And my gut is telling me to go straight to the one oddity I’ve faced both times.

“Ah, Senpai. Welcome.” Akamine seems fine. She says a couple of things to the girls she was just talking to, and they hurry to get away before I can even talk to them. They’re still kind of scared of me, it seems. “What can I do for you today?”

I try to speak up but I’m unsure about what to say. It’s not like I can tell her that I went back in time, or that I suspect that she did something to Kazama. To begin with, no one would believe that she did something to a guy like him.

She is the girl that everyone admires and is jealous of, the one that all the teachers praise. The pride of this institution. There is no way anyone would believe that my gut feeling is right.

“You look very distressed.” The girl insists and I can do nothing but stare at her delicate features turning into a frown. “Is something wrong?”

That question… Isn’t it way too insensitive, even coming from someone who doesn’t like Kazama at all?

“’Something wrong?’, huh.” I don’t know what I’m doing, but I feel like I’m right. I can tell in the way my skin crawls when I think back to those moments where Akamine became someone different, someone more… Abnormal. “My best friend is missing, Akamine-san. That’s what’s wrong.”

“I see… I’m sorry to say this, but I don’t think even the teachers know anything new.” The girl shies away from my gaze. “It’s quite strange, isn’t it?”

“Strange? No. It’s hella abnormal.” Again, it’s not like a dude like Kazama just… Vanishes. That’s just not how it is.

“I’m sure that Senpai knows him better, but is it really that out of the ordinary? As far as I understand, Kazama-san is someone who easily makes enemies.” Akamine speaks softly but clinically. Like she’s analyzing someone’s profile. Someone who she doesn’t personally know or has seen. “My first thought was ‘oh, maybe he fought the wrong people and got sent to the hospital’. But it has been more days than normal for the school to get a notice, hmmm…”

“Kazama doesn’t go around fighting people.” My reply is quick, a little too quick even.

“Is that so?” Although she looks very surprised, her tone doesn’t really share the same impact. “I guess I misunderstood him.”

Past tense…? Am I going crazy? Am I thinking too much about this?

“Kazama’s rough around the edges, but he’s not violent.”

“Could’ve fooled me.” This girl…

“No, seriously. It’s not like that.” I can’t help being pissed off, okay? Not because of Kazama being badmouthed, but because this conversation is starting to feel like the school’s idol has all but written Kazama off already.

When Urara-chan got missing, Kamishiro was quick to get worried. It wasn’t until a week later either. He went to me for help very quickly and presumably got busy searching for her the exact same day.

For someone so fond of that dumbass, Akamine sure doesn’t share that ‘naïve kindness’.

“As it were, that just means that I’m wrong about Kazama-san.” Akamine points out as she tilts her head slightly. “It’s indeed mysterious, but there’s not much that Senpai can do.”

I… Can’t really argue with that.

“I’m sorry.” Akamine adds after the silence is prolonged enough to tell her of how shitty things really are.

It feels fake.

“Nothing ‘I’ can do, huh…” It strikes me as ironic how soft Akamine is being with me here. We never saw eye to eye from what I remember, and she’d always be on the lookout for me or the guys. In case we were up to no good.

It’s too late to wonder about the reason why I’m back to this point, but my mind can’t stop going back to that moment. The utter ill will that this girl had for Kazama… For us, if we’re talking about the first ‘round’.

I can’t keep this up; I have no evidence or even a course of action. I thank Akamine for listening and retreat.

I need to clear my thoughts. It’s not like Kazama’s absence makes it all over, it just means that things have changed. Even if things aren’t the exact same as the first time they happened… Will they really become so abnormal simply because something out of the ordinary happened to me?

“There you are!” A kid-like voice reaches my ears as I walk by the courtyards of the school. It’s that under classmate that is glued to Kamishiro whenever he isn’t with any of the girls.

The guy gets dragged away from the sports club girl. Reine-chan, I think. I remember talking to her once. But nothing more.

She laughs off the scene unfolding in front of her, but she manages to catch a glimpse of me staring.

I wave my hand; she waves back hesitatingly. So I retreat even from this place as it seems that I’m not welcome even when Kazama’s missing.

“Senpai!” Ugh, Kamishiro saw? I need to get out of here faster… “Wait up, Senpai! Is something wrong?!”

There really is no end to the weirdness, huh.

“Just go with your girlfriend and don’t get in people’s business.” I don’t bother looking at him. It’ll just piss me off more.

“S-She’s not my girlfriend!” Right, he’d obviously react this way. I can almost picture him blushing madly. “She’s my—!”

I sweep my gaze around, trying to find something to distract myself with.

There is a girl looking in this direction through the windows, somewhere close to the student council room.

My gut feeling sounds insane. But I’ve never been surer about something in my life.

I returned in time, damn it! I know stuff even without proof! I just… How can I prove that I’m right?