I Accidentally Triggered The Hyperkinetic Tomboy Route! (Part 1)

Heh…today’s finally the day.

It took months of hard work, but today, my dream is finally about to become reality.

I rip off my clothes, my mind filled with thoughts of Haruki as I step forward, baring my naked body to my old friend…

…the bathroom scale.

I look down.

One hundred sixty pounds.

My target body weight.

Finally achieved.

…And it couldn’t have come at a better time:

Unified Athletic Evaluation Day

The big day when all the sports clubs at Saishin Academy evaluate their members to determine who makes the starting rosters for this year’s competitions. Even some students not in sports clubs come just to watch.

And today, Haruki and I have been asked to participate first-hand in several evaluations—reporting on whether the sports clubs are meeting the academy’s standards of integrity.

And that’s where Plan C to isolate Haruki finally comes into play!

Forged in the fires of athletic competition, our bond will strengthen more than ever before!

More importantly, after all my training, I plan to absolutely crush the competition—so hard that Haruki will be left speechless by my athletic prowess.

He’ll be so impressed that he’ll start asking me for advice…begging me to train with him after school…

And that’s when I’ll finally have him in my clutches.

As I step off the scale, I mix my protein drink for the day—pouring in the powder, adding water, then shaking it vigorously.

I pull out my phone and scroll through my workout stats, struggling to hold back laughter at how perfectly everything has progressed.

My plan is flawless.

My genius knows no bounds.

Victory will finally be mine.

And there’s nothing anyone can do to stop me.

The weeks of abuse are over,

It will be me who finally monopolizes Haruki’s time.

And the harem will grovel at my feet.

I double over, my stomach starting to hurt as I lose control of my laughter.

Heh…heh heh…Ha Ha—HA HA HA—MWAHAHAHAHA—

“Can you shut the hell up and finish already? I need to brush my—”

The door swings open.

My sister freezes.

I freeze.

I am:

Naked.

Bent over.

Violently shaking my right hand out of view.

Starting at my phone in the other.

…

Silence.

Disgust.

Pure, unfiltered disgust.

She immediately slams the door shut.

“WAIT! IT’S NOT WHAT YOU—!”

“Scumbag! Enemy of women!”

…

…

…

Not my finest moment.

***

“Ubakawa, if there’s something more interesting out there than the industrial revolution, we’d all love to hear it.”

The class breaks into light laughter as I’m caught staring out the window.

“N-no sensei. Sorry.”

It’s not even the first time I’ve been called out today.

Embarrassed, I force my attention back to the front.

…only to be pulled away again by the steady tapping of a foot behind me.

Guess I’m not the only one who can’t keep their mind off the athletic evaluations.

I sneak a glance back at Arima Ayumi (有馬 歩), sitting behind me, staring out toward the school’s track in the distance.

Already the school’s star athlete just a few weeks into the semester, she fits tomboy archetype almost perfectly.

Tan, athletic build. Messy, boyish dark brown hair. Orange-brown eyes.

She’s one of the few members of Kojima’s harem I actually get along with—probably because she’s basically one of the guys. Fun, easy to talk to, full of energy—

…though not without her flaws.

Let’s just say she can be a bit…much.

Even on a good day she struggles to sit still. And now, with evaluations coming up, she’s just as checked out as I’ve been.

Her foot’s always tapping—but there’s a shift most might miss. When her mind drifts, it gets faster. Sharper.

Picking up on that telltale rhythm, I pinch off a piece of my eraser and flick it onto her desk to save her from the same fate I just suffered.

No reaction.

I flick another piece her way—this time hitting her square in the face.

Really?

Still nothing?

Left with no other choice, I peel off one final piece and take aim…

…sending it straight into her mouth.

She coughs it out immediately and looks over at me, flashing me a mischievous smile—then gives my chair a playful kick.

Ugh, she thinks I’m just messing with her.

I try to subtly nod toward the teacher, dragging a finger across my neck.

“Ubakawa, while I appreciate your concern for Arima safety, I assure you I have no plans to kill her for not paying attention.”

Again, the class breaks into laughter.

“You, on the other hand…”

“Well, if you’re struggling to pay attention, maybe this will help. For the next part of the lesson, you’ll be getting into your table groups for a discussion.

“I’d like you to brainstorm as many ways as you can—in detail—that the steam engine changed life at the time. Please make sure to take notes as you go.”

“Psst—Ubakawa, can I borrow a pencil?” Arima whispers.

I pass one back to her.

SNAP!

“Uh…can I borrow another pencil?”

“...Do I even need to ask what happened to the first one?”

“Sorry.”

The brute can barely control her own strength.

“Ubakawa, can I get a pencil too?” I hear Yuka ask from my right.

I pass her one, then glance over.

She’s looking lovingly at the pencil I just handed her but already has another one on her desk.

“Wait, you already have one, why did you need mine?”

She stares at me blankly for a moment.

SNAP!

“I don’t have a pencil.” she says, splitting hers clean in two.

…Yeah, I don’t have the energy to waste figuring out what game she’s playing.

Behind her, Daina now leans toward me.

“Can I borrow a pencil too?”

“Really? You too? You’re usually so much better than they are about—”

SNAP!

She makes a very deliberate show of snapping it in half right in front of me.

“That’s for ditching us at the library yesterday. Consider us even.”

Haruki chimes in from the desk next to Yuka’s.

“Can I get one too?”

“You’re holding one right in your hand!”

“No fair—why do all your other friends get pencils and not me? Are we not friends anymore?”

He pouts like a spoiled child.

I drag a hand down my face with a groan, then relent, gently tossing him a pencil.

He fumbles the catch, scrambling to grab it—

SNAP!

…Are you—

SNAP!

“Uh Ubakawa…I need another pencil.”

Frustrated, I aggressively place one down on Arima’s desk, then walk over and place one on Haruki’s—no way I’m risking another failed catch.

“Alright, we’re done. No more borrowing—”

I reach into my pouch for a pencil of my own.

...Nothing.

…

I sigh.

Defeated, I slowly make my way over to Takahashi.

“Can I…borrow a pencil?”

“Pfft, how do you forget to bring a pencil to class, man?

You’ve really gotta come more prepared than that.”

Again, I sigh.

“Thanks…I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

I shuffle back to my desk, and our group—me, Yuka, Haruki, Arima, and Daina—push our desks together.

“Okay guys,” I start, any enthusiasm I had completely drained. “Anything unique we can put down? Something less widely known about the time period?”

“Well, as someone who comes from a long line of cattle ranchers,” Daina begins, “My grandpa says the steam engine is actually why American steaks are so big. Before the steam-train, cows in America were tiny—the size of dogs. But once trains started moving, they were only allowed to put a certain number in each train car, so they had to breed them to be bigger.

Daina’s head is tilted up, eyes scrunched—a dead giveaway anytime she’s fibbing.

“Then what about the dogs in America, did they used to be the size of cows?” I ask sarcastically.

My rebuttal goes completely ignored.

“Wow, Daina, really? That’s so cool!” Haruki says.

“Yeah, I didn’t know that either!” Yuka adds.

“I could really go for a steak right now,” Arima says, mouth watering.

“Ooh! What’s your favor—?”

I cut her off.

“Guys, can we stay on topic? How about we build off Daina’s, uh…remark? We could talk about how the steam engine helped transport food, for example. Those early trains were quite reliable relative to carriages, and moved at like, twenty to thirty miles per hour—that’s pretty impactful.”

“So what you’re saying is…steam engines have nothing on Arima?” Haruki jokes.

“Oh, stop it, Kojima. I'm nervous enough about today as it is.”

“Guys please—can we stay on—”

“Wait, why are you nervous? Everybody knows how amazing you are.”

“Which is why I don’t wanna let ‘em down! Everybody’s counting on me! I gotta make Saishin proud, ya know?”

“Still…I wish you’d learn a bit of moderation. You worry me sometimes. You don’t always have to push yourself so hard for our sake.”

“You worry too much, Ubakawa. I can handle it! Hand all your burdens to me, and I’ll carry Saishin to victory!”

She grabs her arm and flexes.

“Just think of me as everyone's reliable big sister!”

“Well, sis, if you don’t mind, before the teacher gets mad, maybe we can get back on—”

“It’s a little later for that, Ubakawa.”

Uh oh.

“First, I’d appreciate it if my five problem children could try a little harder to stay on topic.”

“Sorry, sensei,” we all apologize.

“Second—that’s three strikes, Ubakawa. Meet me in the hallway after class. I think we have something important to discuss.”

“...Yes, sensei.”