Abaddon

"I should never have accepted that promotion." Abaddon grumbled as he rubbed his temples, his eyes closed,  brow furrowed. If he hadn't accepted the position of the Boss's right hand, this "girl" problem wouldn't be in his lap right now.  

Now that the Boss was aware of this unique situation, it was time for Abaddon to take matters into his own hands. There was no longer enough time to see what Nigel would turn up.

He headed down to speak with Agnes first, since she was the first one to report a sighting of the creature. He was headed toward the Receiving Room when he heard something that sent a icy chill down his spine. He stopped dead in his tracks. Was that... laughter?

"This can't be happening." He mumbled as he opened the door to the Coffin Room. He glanced around quickly. At first, everything seemed normal. Rows and rows of coffins lined the room, every one filled with someone screaming and begging to be freed from their claustrophobic prison. Except for one. One coffin, to the far left, was not screaming, but silent. Abaddon approached it slowly, putting his ear to the smooth wooden top to listen. At first, there was nothing. Could it be empty? They rarely had a vacancy in this room, claustrophobia is one of the most common phobias after all. He reached out and touched the lid gently, wrapping his fingers around the edge of the lid, he lifted it quickly.

"Kitty!" The girl sprang forth from inside the coffin, climbing up and over Abaddon with a swiftness for which he was ill prepared. Before he could react, she had launched herself leap-frog style over his head, running out the door into the hall.

"Stop! I demand you come back here at once!" Abaddon yelled as his mind finally caught up to the situation. He darted out into the hall, but he was too late. She was gone without a trace.

"I'm getting too old for this." He panted as he jogged down the hall, hoping to find something, anything, that would lead him to her. He poked his head in every door along the hall, looking for any signs of disturbance in the usual hellish chaos.

He checked in the Snake Room. Just a man screaming for help while being consumed by an 80 foot python. Nothing unusual here.

He checked the Surgery Room. There, he saw only the usual business, a demon in a surgical gown and cap, cutting open a woman and removing her organs while she cried in agony, begging him to stop. Status quo here too.

At the Fun House Room, he paused before turning the knob. Something in his ancient bones told him this is where the girl would be. He opened the door and stepped inside. Immediately he was met with a hall of mirrors. From somewhere to his right, he heard the distinct giggle of a small child playing hide and seek. "Here, Kitty, I just want to talk to you" he cooed in the softest, most unnatural voice he could muster. He saw a flash of pink and white to his left, but when he turned it was gone. Then another giggle behind him. 

Abaddon knelt down. He light his index finger like a match, using it to look closer at the ground. Seeing what he needed, he extended his lit finger to touch an arrow on the floor of the hall of mirrors. The arrow blazed with an orange glow, pointing in the direction of the exit. As he walked, the next arrow lit up to show him the way. After a few minutes, he had navigated out of the mirrors and into the next part of the fun house. The clowns.

As he stepped into the clown section, fully expecting to see several terrifyingly gruesome clowns waiting for their next victim. Instead, he saw no one. How strange, he thought. He crossed the room in seconds, reaching for the doorknob to the next section, when he heard it again. Laughter. This time, to his right. 

It was the stage door. This was where the demons prepared for their shift as terrifying clowns. They would discuss new scare tactics, share scare stories, and smoke cigarettes in between scare sessions. Abaddon reached for the knob and turned it slowly. Stepping inside he could see five clowns sitting in on couches and chairs, chatting like a bunch of friendly colleagues. One of the clowns had a small girl sitting on his shoulders. She spotted Abaddon immediately.

"Kitty," she giggled, as she jumped to her feet on top of the clown's shoulders. Abaddon raced across the room at full speed. Kitty leapt into the air and pulled the top half of her body into an open vent in the ceiling. Abaddon, seeing his target escaping once again, also leapt forward, grabbing one of her ankles before she could pull herself into the vent. Kitty's entire body immediately burst into bright blue flames, engulfing Abaddon's hand. 

"Yow!" he screamed as he let go of her leg and cradled his charred hand. He looked up into the vent, but as he suspected, she was gone, once again. He stared at his charred hand in disbelief. He could light his fingers like matches, but the blue flames of this Kitty girl burned his skin. How very peculiar.

"This little girl is going to cost me my job." He stormed toward the door. Suddenly, he stopped. Turning to look at the clowns, who were all staring, either at Abaddon, or the open vent in the ceiling. 

"Next time she comes here, you call me. IMMEDIATELY." He turned and slammed the door behind him.

"Lucifer's Lunchbox, what a grouch." One of the clowns said as he lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply.